Start again

[A/N] This is the sequel to What it means... If you haven't read it, it might be a good idea to start there, but I think you can follow this story without the prequel (although I am not responsible if you don't understand at one point!) I hope you will enjoy this story as well! The characters are older, around seventeen, and, I warn you, the story has nothing to do with the manga or the anime, contrary to the prequel.

I'm using more of my imagination for this one, and so far, I am having a lot of fun. I hope you will as well!

Obviously, I do not own Naruto, but Hana is truly mine.

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Enjoy and stay safe,

Oblix.

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Prologue – And Learn

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Many things have changed since that day. The feeling of betrayal, the anger, the yearning, for a start. Haruno Sakura was once a childish little girl. She remembers the laughs, the sugar-glazed cakes of her father, the taste of fresh strawberries that still somehow reemerges on the tip of her tongue every time she has the occasion to lie in the sun and look at the changing forms of the clouds in the sky.

Then, she met people who changed her and she became a naive teenage girl, a young kunoichi full of life. Someone who was always clinging to the light, looking at things with a rational yet positive approach. She was loving with all her might, caring with all her love. She remembers the laughs, the splashes of ramen broth on her face and the soft touch of his lips on hers every time she glances at the picture on her nightstand.

Sometimes, she wonders what happened to her old self. If she just vanished to never come back or if there is still hope, somewhere, someday, for her. She takes a sip of sake and observes her already drunk sensei through a lock of pink hair. Her blond pigtails are falling perfectly on either side of her generous breasts, her cheeks are red, just like the tip of her nose, and her eyes, half-closed, do not seem to register anything anymore. And yet, Sakura knows not to be fooled by that look.

"Drink," the woman orders, eyes still not quite looking at anything. "I won't let you waste good sake."

Sakura sighs but drinks down her cup anyway. Then, she wipes her mouth with the back of her hand and leans forward on her elbows, the table tilting a little bit toward her when she does. "Tsunade-sama. You wanted to talk to me."

Her sensei suddenly claps her hands on the table, the half-empty (or half-full) bottle of sake almost falling under the impact and one cup losing some of its liquor. Sakura sinks into her seat when she feels the looks of strangers on her. "You're no fun, really. I should have chosen Yamanaka. She may be talentless, but at least, she knows how to have fun."

The pinkette rolls her eyes at that, her arms now crossed over her chest, but does not say a word. She learned the hard way when to keep quiet.

"These are dark times to be alive, Sakura."

Again, she stays silent as a shadow passes above their table, taking away the remnant of playfulness that was still present on their features, replacing it by seriousness.

"I might not be here forever."

"Tsuna–"

"I need to know that I can count on you to protect the Leaf."

Slowly, Sakura unfolds her arms and leans forward on the table again, taking one of her sensei's hands in hers with furrowed brows. "What are you talking about? I'm your apprentice. I'll be by your side."

The woman suddenly grabs Sakura's wrist, her manicured nails penetrating the skin painfully under her iron grip. "Stop your bullshit, Sakura. Stop acting like a self-doubtful little girl. You're not my apprentice anymore, but a truly powerful woman who already surpassed her master. And now, I need you to promise me to protect the Leaf. Swear that you will, no matter what."

Sakura blinks a few times, now completely forgetting the nails still leaving marks on her pale skin. "Protecting the Leaf," she repeats, nodding after a brief pause. "I swear."

"By any means possible."

"Right… Tsunade-sama, I'm not sure I understand why you –"

"You have to take the initiative and kiss them first."

"W-what?"

"Another drink, miss?"

Sakura jumps in her seat when the waiter appears from nowhere and clears the table in front of her.

"She won't take anything else, because she's boring, but I'll take another bottle of that sake."

The man turns to Tsunade and after bowing respectfully, he murmurs a shy of course Hokage-sama and scurries away.

Then, the blonde nonchalantly interlaces her fingers together and leans her chin on them. "We can't trust anyone right now." Sakura glances back at the flustered waiter before returning her gaze on her sensei, wondering just how drunk the woman really is. She shakes her head and is about to object when Tsunade's whisper reaches her ears. "Danzo." Sakura's eyes widen. What about him? Has she finally found something? "Protect the Leaf from Danzo."

A door closes and Sakura jumps again, glancing in its direction as her hand reaches for her stammering heart, but the waiter comes back at the same time and the young woman redirects her attention before her, where Tsunade is offering a generous tip with a rude wave, as if to ask not to be disturbed again. After accepting the money with a low bow of his head, the man returns behind the bar and the blonde's gaze falls on her. The two woman stare at each other for a while, until the older one breaks the silence.

"What are you thinking?"

Sakura mimics her sensei's posture, interlacing her fingers in turn, her chin resting on them. "That you are insane."

With a smile, the blonde reaches for the bottle, fills her cup, empties it in one gulp and fills it again. "And?"

"By protecting the Leaf, what do you really mean? Being the head of the hospital, the next Hokage (we both know it won't happen), or protecting Naruto?"

Tsunade drinks down her cup and sighs, her eyes closed. "You already know the answer to this, Sakura. I don't need you at the head of the hospital. Shizune can do that."

"Mm. But I can't protect him. Not alone."

"With a little bit of luck, that lazy copy-cat will be there as well."

"And what about Sai?"

"I already gave him another mission."

Sakura gulps, glances left and right, and leans above the table, her nose almost reaching the other woman's face. "A mission? Tsunade-sama, what's going on? What did you find out? Is this about Jiraya-sama's death? Do you know something we don't?"

At the mention of her deceased teammate, Tsunade sits taller in her chair and bites the inside of her cheek. Sakura knows she has just crossed a line, but she really needs to find the meaning of it all, because right now, she does not understand anything.

"Be careful, Sakura. And be prepared. Because when the time comes, and it will, I probably won't be there to fix everything. You need to be ready, to sleep with an eye open, the take your shower with your weapons next to your soap. We are at war, Sakura. It's only a matter of time before everyone notices."

Suddenly, the woman stands up, empties her cup in one gulp and takes the bottle in an inelegant swing before loudly pushing her chair with her foot and exiting the bar, staggering through tables and people.

Now left alone, Sakura stays seated, gaze lost in the distance. She just does not know what to make of all this. Tsunade has always been the kind of woman to dramatize a lot, that is for sure. But somehow, today was too real, and the pinkette cannot continue to believe that it is simply the sake talking…

She does not know how much time she spent staring at the void, but eventually, the waiter comes back to see if she is going to order something else, and she takes this as her cue to finally leave the shabby bar. While walking back home, she notices that her head is slightly buzzing and that she feels like she is floating, and she wonders if these are the little alcohol she drank doings, or if the heavy feeling that this is the end of the world is slowly draining her of her last bit of energy. She sighs and wipes the sweat beading from her forehead. It is not quite dark yet, but she missed the sunset again.

When she walks past her old street, she stops and stares at the familiar alley, with its lovely flowers and lazy cats. She wants to take it. It is faster and it carries a lot of memories, good memories, but she can't, she just can't. She swallows her tears and turns on her heels, using the long way home and closing her eyes when a soft breeze passes and flutters her green summer dress. Slowly, she unties her hair, the action giving her goosebumps as long locks cascade down and graze the uncovered skin of her neck, shoulders and back. She continues her way until she reaches a familiar ramen stand and a boisterous laugh reaches her ears, the sound stoping her dead on her track. She slowly approaches the stall from where she can see spiky blond hair, her heart already feeling lighter, but then she notices a pretty black-haired girl sitting next to the young man and decides to retrace her steps back to the road. With the weight on her shoulders returning, Sakura resumes her walk and tries to ignore the feeling of loneliness that is slowly adding up to her other problems.

She cannot remember how she finally reached her apartment; she probably was too lost in thoughts. Now in her bath, Sakura tries to forget everything. It is so unusual for her to have a night off that she should not be losing it by stressing out about inexistent threats. She sighs and sinks deeper in the hot water, closing her eyes as she feels her limbs relaxing. Every time she hears something about a threat, a danger, an unknown villain, she cannot refrain from worrying about him. She knows he managed to defeat Orochimaru, but he still never came back. She caught snippets of stories about what he was doing, and even if she despises everything she heard and the man he became, she worries about his safety. She knows he would be safer (and happier) inside the village, with his team, his friends, with her. But then, a wise voice inside her head, reminding her of another lost friend, tells her to worry about herself and herself only. This threat is in the village anyway, she remembers abruptly. Sasuke is safe. She is not. She has to be careful.

She does not know since when her head is underwater. When she realizes it, Sakura reemerges with a gasp and after coughing the liquid out of her lungs, she outstretches her arm, her naked body half out of the tub hanging in an inelegant way as she reaches for her pouch. When her fingers finally close on the small bag, she retracts herself in the warmth of the bath and leaves her weapons in balance on the side of the tub, next to her soap.