A/N: This is my first attempt at writing a story so please excuse general errors like grammar and such. I have wanted to write a story for a while now and I figured now was as good a time as any. I have so many plot ideas that I may end up jumbling a few of the together so if at any point it seems like there is more than one story going on...you know why.
Constructive criticism is of course welcome, but if you hate the story just don't read it, there are literally countless other ones on this site.
I'm hoping to update chapters fairly frequently, so if this story develops a fan base stay tuned for more chapters. On that note Part ll coming very soon.
The Harry Potter franchise belongs to J.K Rowling all the characters, (magical)place names and general world are the property of her. Although who knows, knowing her she may just make this meta.
Enjoy.
Chapter 1 - Epiphanies & New Beginnings Part l
Emerald eyes stared back at me as I stood, motionless in front of the sink in the upstairs bathroom of number 6, Privet Drive. Normally I'm not one to take much notice of my appearance, vanity not being a trait I had the luxury of developing in my formative years and even throughout my tenure at Britain's premiere Wizarding School I never felt the need to 'clean up' as it were. However as I look at the face of the man in the mirror even I can't help but grimace. My raven black hair while usually perpetually windswept and somewhat unkempt now falls lamely to the side of my head and nearly reaches my chin. My skin is pale, more so than usual, as if I hadn't seen the sun in weeks, which is technically true, my lack of appetite has caused what little fat on me to disappear, which highlights my high cheekbones. I don't need to look down to know that the rest of me isn't much better. What's worse is the stench, which after two weeks of wallowing in self pity has become unbearable. So much so that it even starting to bother Hedwig, and not wanting to upset my feathered friend I hauled myself down the hall to to the bathroom.
I walk over to the stall and turn the water on setting the temperature to somewhere between mildly warm and blisteringly hot. I return to the mirror and focus on my hair which is too long for my tastes. I knelt down to the cabinet under the sink and opened the door, I grabbed the pair of scissors which I know from memory are on the middle shelf beside the teeth whitening kit Dudley got last year after realising his teeth had become yellow and in an attempt to not be found out by his smothering parents purchased it using a portion of his weekly allowance.. I grab my hair as if to tie it in a ponytail and cut off what I estimate to be about three inches. I bin the dead ends and strip down before entering the now steamy shower. I spend a solid ten minutes and a fair portion of the soap scrubbing my body in order to get rid of the built up grime and dirt, then with a comb and liberal use of shampoo I untangle and clean my knotted hair, with this done I close my eyes and let the water run over my body. As I felt the rivulets of water run their course over my skin I began to think about the series of events which had plagued my every waking thought for the past week, not that my unconscious thoughts weren't taunted by similiar thoughts..
Firstly, my idiotic half cocked attempt to sneak into the Department of Mysteries to save my Godfather, the closest thing I had to family left in this world, from the clutches of the most powerful dark wizard to walk the earth since Herpo the Foul along with a number of his inner circle, veteran magic users whose body counts numbered in the hundreds. Of course being the Gryffindor that I am, I charged head first with nothing more than a ragtag team of students, who I had trained, as my backup. What happened next would have been a surprise to absolutely nobody with any common sense. It was a trap, Voldemort had taken full advantage of my weakened mental defenses after a round of Occlumency lessons with Snape and planted false images of a captured Sirius being tortured by his deranged cousin. We miraculously managed to sneak into the Ministry and began our trek into its murky bowls, about a dozen of them were lying in wait for us in the Hall of Prophecies, where they began to pick us off one by one. Perhaps I had underestimated the abilities of the Death Eaters or overestimated the abilities of my classmates, likely both, but they stood little chance against the onslaught of the Death Eaters who quickly cornered them and would have killed them had I not broken their formation with a surprisingly fast series of bone-breakers and blasting hexes and charged through their lines forcing them to chase after me and leave my friends in a spent heap under the watchful eyes of two of their own. They chased me to a dark empty atrium which had nothing more than a veiled mirror in its space. They had me pinned under my overcharged shield charm, when Voldemort glided into the hall exuding an air of victory as he commanded his minions to stop. He then gave me an orb, which seemed to be infused with mist. He told me that a prophecy was made before I was born that pertained to the two of us, one which entwined our two souls in the mischievous machinations of fate herself. He told me that should I wish to learn of my fate I need only peer into the orb, and seeing no other choice and my curiosity peaked despite the situation that's what I did. When I looked into the orb I felt an unknown force reach out to my mind and drew me into the very core of the orb, in their I heard the echoes of a ghostly voice reverberating around my mind "Born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies... and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will born as the seventh month dies." I looked up as the voice left my head, Voldemort was looking at me with some eagerness in his eye. "So" he rasped. "How does it end". I realised despite the fact that my head was still spinning from hearing the prophecy that Voldemort had never heard the prophecy in it's entirety and that something was preventing him from looking inside the orb. So in either the most moronic or brazen move of my life to date,I looked him straight in the eyes and spoke clearly "You will never know" before pivoting and with all the strength I could muster smashed the prophecy on the ground.
Next thing I know I am on the floor writhing under the power of Voldemort's Cruciatus, for how long I couldn't say but the pain is something I won't ever forget, it felt like searing hot knives were piercing every inch of my skin, it was one hundred times worse than the basilisk venom and I can still feel phantom pains even now nearly a week and a half later. However it did not last forever, it did not end by the good graces of Voldemort however but by the timely intervention of the Order, led by an enraged Sirius who was closely followed by Dumbledore. The battle which ensued was somewhat of a blur but I remember clambering to my feet high on adrenaline and firing any spell that I could think of as I made my way over to Sirius. Dumbledore had engaged Voldemort and the two magical giants had removed themselves to a larger area so as to have more room to unload their expansive arsenal of spells on each other. Meanwhile the Order using their greater number began to command the fight, causing a number of the Death Eaters to turn tail and run. Included amoung this was my opponent Alecto Carrow who I was fighting evenly up to that point, her dis apparition distracted me enough that I didn't even notice a banisher leave the wand of Bellatrix until it was too near for me to do anything about it. The pain I expected to greet me never came as Sirius in an act befitting a Gryffindor had pushed me out of the way of the curse taking it in my stead and being thrown effortlessly through the air towards the mirror. From my place on the floor I watched as time seemed to slow down as Sirius' body slowly disappeared through the Veil. Bellatrix in an acknowledgement of her accomplishment then proceeded to sing a jaunty tune in her apparent victory. "I killed Sirius Black...I killed Sirius Black". I saw red as I charged at Bellatrix firing spell after spell at the witch who laughed maniacally as she skipped around my spells and led me out of the hall towards the atrium where the battle between the Light Lord and the Dark Lord was being fought. Spells of epic magnitude and effect were being flung around like schoolyard jinxes. Even now I still feel humbled by the level of these two wizards.
Voldemort, who already appeared to be winning the duel, was reinforced by Bellatrix who began to throw vicious looking curses at the already pressed Chief Warlock, thinking I could even the bout by joining the fray I started to throw curses at the Dark Lord. I soon realised my mistake when he turned his wand on me and started firing spells which I couldn't even begin to identify, but could guess were all deadly in nature. I was forced to resort to a protego, which lasted a total of fifteen second under the onslaught of Slytherin's descendant. It seemed that my saving grace was Voldemort's desire to find out the contents of the prophecy as, immediately after my shield dropped he invaded my mind with the force of a battering ram and attempted to possess my body so that I would give up my secrets. A battle in my mind ensued and it took every ounce of will I had to force the darkness from my mind, but in the end after a mental tug of war battle pushed him from my mind. Then darkness.
I woke up two days later in the Hogwarts infirmary dazed and confused, but feeling clearer than I had in years, my body felt lighter and my thoughts more focused, even my vision was fixed. However this euphoria lasted all of five minutes when I realised that I had lost the only father figure I had ever had in my life. I became numb, I couldn't comprehend the reality of my situation, this was not helped when after being cleared by Pomfrey I was ushered up to Dumbledore's office where he proceeded to explain the contents of the prophecy, and how I was fated to fight Voldemort as only I could truly beat him, and how Voldemort had kept himself alive by creating a number of Horcruxes, a foul piece of Soul Magic which would tether a person's soul to mortal plains through the use of soul containers. If this wasn't already enough The Chief Warlock in his ultimate wisdom had decided it was in my best interest to return to number 6 in the name of keeping me safe instead of taking me someplace in order to prepare me for my inevitable face off against the Dark Lord. This thought brought forth the only bit of emotion I had felt since Sirius disappeared through the Veil as in response to my sudden spike in frustration my magic lashed out wildly and launched just about every trinket, book and smaller piece of furniture outwards, crashing against the wall. Dumbledore's surprise at this magical outburst briefly matched my own, before disappearing and transforming into a more contemplative look. He then suggested, that damn twinkle in his eye that I would need to continue my lessons with Snape in the fall and then excused me to go rest in my dorm for the last night before summer break.
Everything from then till now has become a bit of a blur, with the train ride to King's Cross being held mostly in silence despite Hermione and Ron's attempts to get me to talk. I was just not in the mood to talk quidditch with Ron or humour Hermione's attempts to play Freud. So after halfheartedly saying goodbye to the other members of the Golden Trio and shrugging at Hermione's vague explanation on why they would not be able to correspond over the summer I made my way over to a waiting Vernon who said nothing and just turned on his heels and walked to his car. In the car ride home Vernon who, sensing my disposition decided against antagonising me, and only spoke to say that he, Petunia and Dudley would be leaving tomorrow for a sun holiday in Southern France and that I would be on my own for most of the summer.
Returning from my memories I open my eyes and feel that the water has gone cold and figure that it's probably about time that I get out of the shower. I towel off already missing the use of drying charms, and curse the ministry and their infuriating Underage laws. I return to the mirror and brighter eyes greet me. Looking in the mirror I spot a noticeable difference, my skin whilst still too pale for my liking is atleast not marred by dirt and grime, and my hair has returned to it's silky appearance. My cleaner look however seems to highlight my underfed appearance. This is easily fixable I realise, thanks to shite British weather there is no one around to restrict my meal times. I exit the bathroom and head down the hall to my bedroom, or rather the Dursley's spare bedroom which they so graciously allow me to stay in during the summer months. Sparse would be an understatement. Like every room in number 6 it is meticulously well maintained, but that is where the similarity ends. Whilst the other rooms in the house were furnished from floor to ceilings there existed only a few pieces of furniture in this room; a cot, a wardrobe, a chair and a desk. My trunk and Hedwig's cage are the only things that belong to me in this room. Going over to the wardrobe I pulled out an old set of Dudley's old clothes: a pair of Levi's that are faded and have a hole at the left knee and a shirt with the name of some punk band Dudley liked for all of one week two summers ago. Both articles of clothing despite having not fit Dudley for the last two years are still slightly too big on me, although fit a damn sight better than they usually do.
Now dressed I sit in the chair and put my feet up on the desk, I tilt my head back and stare blankly at the ceiling. That shower had done wonders to clear my foggy mental state I realised suddenly. My thoughts were no longer jumbled together, but instead seemed to be organised and compartmentalised so that just thinking about anything of importance didn't give me a headache. That brief wisp of mental focus I felt after waking up in the infirmary seemed to have returned with a vengeance. Using this focus I began to look at the events of the last two weeks in a completely different light. Firstly Sirius, I had been drowning in guilt since the events surrounding the revelation of the prophecy, I had been blaming myself entirely for his death. However I realise now that it is not me who is to blame for Sirius but rather Bellatrix, she was the one who fired the spell which did him in, not me. I understand that some part of me will always blame myself for what happened, if I hadn't fallen for the Dark Lord's ruse then none of this would have happened, and the closest thing I had to a father would still be alive, but Sirius wouldn't have wanted me to sit around moping and he certainly would not have wanted me to blame myself. In fact he probably would have just laughed it off and said to avenge him and to have some fun while doing it, which is exactly what I would do. Secondl the prophecy, fate it would seem truly likes to have her fun with me. Now normally I would be inclined to say that the prophecy was a complete hoax, especially considering the source, but Dumbledore, while not exactly the poster child of honesty, would not tell me it was true if it weren't. So then it would seem that the fate of the Wizarding World rests in my hands, a teenager who while better with a wand than most my age doesn't even hold a candle to the skills of a prodigious Dark Lord with over fifty years more experience than myself, who Dumbledore thinks I can defeat him with some unknown power which I honestly think he believes is love or something equally ridiculous like...friendship. No this would not do, I wasn't going to sit around twiddling my thumbs until my eventual face off with Voldemort and hope everything will just turn out ok for the good guys. If Dumbledore wasn't going to train then I will just have to get stronger myself. I could no longer afford to be just another one of the flock waiting patiently for the shepherd to lead me to greener pastures.
Where to begin was the big question, the old me would probably have wrestled over this for a day or two before asking Hermione for help and then going off to play chess or gobstones with Ron, but with this new focus and knowledge of inevitable events I hurried over to my trunk to get some parchment and my self inking quill. Returning to the desk I began to write a summary of my skills when it came to the different branches of magic, and what I needed to gain in each of these topics by the end of the summer.
Transfiguration : Knowledge of the theory up until fifth year is passable at best, practical abilities are good enough to make me an above average student, however the spells we have learnt until now have little practical use in battle so time needs to be spent going over the theory from previous years and mastering all the spells that we have been taught before teaching myself the topics of the NEWT classes which deal specifically with implementing transfigurations in duels. This needs to be done as transfiguration is the basis of Battle Magic, a branch of transfiguration that few even begin to learn but those who do become proficient are usually regarded as legends, Dumbledore comes to mind.
Charms: Similar to transfiguration my practical abilities in charms far outweigh my theoretical knowledge. Emphasis on revision will need to be made before being able to progress onto more advanced charms work, like dueling charms and elemental magic.
Potions: My knowledge and proficiency are both above average... when not in Snape's classroom. As it stands I am unlikely to have made it into the NEWT class after purposefully botching part of my practical OWL so that I wouldn't have to endure another year with Snape. This might be one of the best decisions my old self had made as this free time could now be given to other subjects, and to researching and brewing medical potions and salves which I will eventually need in the future.
Defense Against The Dark Arts: This class is probably my academic saving grace and is where in both theory and practical I am actually ahead of most Hogwarts students. Despite this however I am still well below where I need to be. When it came to this subject what I needed to work on most was my spell repertoire, I had probably less than twenty spells which I could use that had some sort of use in a fight. All I needed to do was remember the glimpse of the fight I had seen between Dumbledore and Voldemort to know that this would be nowhere near enough. The sheer quantity of spells those two knew and the individual damage each of them caused was simply mystifying. While two weeks ago this would have intimidated me, now it inspires me to commit my whole being to reaching their level...and surpass it.
Occlumency: Now I understand the importance or rather the necessity of acquiring good mental defenses, and while I'm reluctant to return to lessons with Snape unless I can find some guide to the art, I can do nothing for now except practice the mind clearing technique Snape was trying to teach me, who knows maybe my new mental clarity would lend itself to allowing me to more easily practice the art.
Sitting back I read over my work, this will be a good start for now and would allow me to add things as needed. Thinking for one last minute if there was anything else, absentmindedly rubbing my arm as I did so. I realised with a start that I was beginning to lose what little muscle mass I had gained over the year and added physical conditioning to the list of things I could work on. Increasing my physical stamina would likely increase the time I could last in a duel. Besides with the Dursley's gone there is nothing stopping me from eating right and staying fit. With that done I stood up from my seat and stretched out my limbs and paced the room. A tapping at the window interrupted any train of thought. I opened the window and was greeted by my feathery companion who playfully nipped at my fingers when I went to pet her. "Hello to you too girl, did you enjoy your hunt?" I asked stroking under her beak affectionately. She chirped back in a response I knew to be positive. "Things are changing girl."I whispered. "I have no choice but to change with them, for better or for worse, will you stay with me" she responded with a look that said of course she would. I grinned, then setting Hedwig down on the perch in her cage I made my way over to the cot and clambered under the covers. Good, I thought to myself as I closed my eyes, because ignorance is no longer bliss and I will do everything in my power to bring this world into an era of peace. It will be an arduous journey but for once the path ahead of me is clear. I know what I must do. With that thought I drifted off into the lands of Morpheus.