"I love you," Sirius had whispered against his lips a long time ago—

—against reason, against promise, against peace, against hope, against happiness, against all discouragement that could be.

Charles Dickins, Great Expectations

. . . .

2nd of January 1981

James watched Sirius with an odd fascination, noting the way the artificial light of the streetlamps engulfed him like a damned halo, and blood – divine and pure – seeped at the edges, proclaiming the darkness to be his birthright.

'Sirius was beautiful, and his lips—'

James groaned inwardly, trying to think of anything but those lips.

Sirius, to his credit, seemed to be focused on their mission and intent on ignoring James' wandering thoughts, ever the vigilant. His eyes were scanning the empty street from their hiding place by the forgotten alley, tucked away into the corner of some decrepit building used for storage.

"Stop thinking about my lips," Sirius whispered furiously – a pause, then he added, "I know I'm beautiful, mate."

James frowned, and crossed his arms stubbornly. "Stop violating my thoughts then – besides you promised you wouldn't use Legilimency on me!"

Sirius took his eyes off the street for a second to glare at him. "I'm not doing it deliberately, it's like you're practically shouting it my direction…"

"What? I'm not," James protested.

Sirius shot him another dark look, before he turned back to the empty street, ignoring him.

Silence fell between the two wizards hidden by the night, and James was left to the mercy of his inopportune thoughts. It was always about Sirius, the ruddy wanker tormented him even in dreams.

James narrowed his eyes, glaring at the back of Sirius' head then—"We've been here for over an hour already. If there ever was a meeting, we've been misled and it's not here!"

Sirius groaned and raised his hands in frustration. "I'm going to fucking kill you if you don't shut up."

"But Sirius—"

"Quit whinging!"

James pouted – outright pouted – and crossed his arms like a petulant child, much to Sirius' astonishment.

'Fucking bastard, I'll teach him—'

"I can read your stupid thoughts," Sirius said through gritted teeth. "Would you shut the fuck up?"

"Your mother is stupid!" James retorted.

This time, Sirius faced him directly, his eyes staring wide at James then he chocked, trying in vain not to laugh aloud least their cover gets blown. James bit on his lower lip to keep himself joining his best friend.

It took him a minute to collect himself, but Sirius grinned at him, all sharp teeth and tempting lips that looked tinted with blood. Before James could control himself, he lunged forward and slammed their lips together, their hips rutted involuntarily as James used his body to press Sirius against the filthy brick wall.

Sirius kissed him back just as ferocious, one of his hand grabbed James' shoulder and the other went to cup his jaw. His touch was gentle, the warmth radiating off him nearly blinding.

The friction nearly drove James mad, who sought his relief or rather tried to.

Sirius, the cruel-hearted son of a bitch, pushed him off and kept his hand on James' chest to keep a safe distance between them. He didn't even try and hide his arousal, the bulge noticeable even in dim lighting.

"What – you're not getting some with Lily?" Sirius mocked, his tongue darting out to lick his lower lip. The smirk that was on his lips told James enough.

Sirius was enjoying it.

'Bastard!'

James groaned, and his head fell back against his side of the wall with a thud. "Harry takes up most of her time. Heh, what can I say – he is my son after all. I can't exactly complain..."

A flicker of something went through Sirius' eyes, something that looked like remorse. James tensed at that; a remorseful Sirius was a stiffy-killer, and James was far too horny for that shite.

"Fuck me," James whispered.

The desire to be close to Sirius, to touch him and kiss him was overwhelming his senses, his magic seeking that of Sirius, needing him in all the ways that were so sinful and yet, utterly innocent. It was love at its' purest, and that was something James believed wholeheartedly.

Sirius' grey eyes, so ancient and heavenly – Black – darkened ever so slightly.

James smiled softly at him, triumphant.

. . . .