RE: I own nothing but Amara and the small subplot, the rest belongs to the creators of Law and Order:SVU
A/N: thanks very much for clicking on my story, it starts slowly and there's no a huge amoung of action or fluff in this first chapter. It's shorter than my chapters usually are, they're normally around 5,000 words, I should be updating in about three days. This is more like a prologue.
Chapter 1: Drapetomania
The amount of time that she'd spent stupidly smiling that day made her scoff, and beside her, her brother leaned forwards, palm on his knee as he curved his gave around to give her a lilting look, "what?"
She handed him the photo, "I just... I don't know why you brought these with you Fin."
He took it from her, glancing to it, "c'mon... I'm just tryna' to remind you what you left behind."
"You're never gonna give up are you?" she asked with a huffing laugh, green eyes bright as they met her brothers', "I can say with all honesty that that was the worst birthday of my life, all the pictures you have to chose from, and this is the one you've chosen?"
His hazel eyes scanned the photo and finally a smile quirked at his lips, "'cause this is a moment where I feel like, we were really being us."
In the photo, Fin had his arm around Amara who wore an obnoxious yellow suit and was holding a bottle of scotch up high. Fin himself was slightly tipsy and the green homburg hat that his ex had given him as a present was practically falling off the side of his face. They were both on Fin's couch, the thing was about as hard as a piece of cotton so the cushions were practically swallowing them.
The funniest thing about the photo was probably that Amara's dog Paetan had her head shoved into Fin's crotch.
Glancing around the café she shook her head, "yeah, well, you can blame Derek that those days are over. He kicked me out of my own city."
"He didn't kick you out Mars, you could've stayed," he said, "you coulda' pressed charges."
"Yeah," Amara murmured, "I could have. But... I didn't want to go to court, I didn't want to testify, I just wanted to leave it all behind."
He nodded, he'd heard the story before, "you still gettin' texts from the guy?"
Amara shook her head, "nah, I think he cooled a bit. Maybe found another hobby?"
"Another hobby or another girl?" Fin asked sharply.
Amara flinched.
Two years ago, Amara had dated a guy called Derek Fletcher. He'd seemed like a decent enough guy at first, but after awhile things got tense. Amara was what her brother liked to call a tough cookie, the guy had knocked her around a bit, said some things, and then, after one especially hard hit, she'd knocked him down and moved out.
Problem was that Derek never really left Amara alone after that. Things started happening; her partner in work got mugged, she started receiving threats and, then, the polar opposite, love letters. She'd left because she'd never been one to start a fight and went to California, and she'd loved it there. But Fin had never let it go.
He'd claimed that the lack of response from her part encouraged Derek, and even if it didn't he needed charges to be pressed. Because if he moved on to another girl, it'd be on her. He was right, of course, Fin was practically always right. But he also didn't know the full story.
"Let it go Fin."
He did, momentarily, "so when are you movin' down here?"
She smiled, in affection, "I want to, I really do Fin. But despite everything... I don't feel safe when I come down here."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means that..."
"Self defence training, your training with Paetan, your training to become a cop... you're a frickin' powerhouse Amara," Fin counted out on his fingers, "and that's not to mention you got me, I'm not your everyday cop, you know that? New York, SVU. I worked hard to get there man, don't tell me that some bum that lives off of his girlfriends' is gonna scare you."
Amara raised her brows at him, taking a moment to think. Because she didn't have time, nor did she want to have the conversation again, "yeah... yeah, look Fin, I gotta go. I told you I was only passing through and I've gotta make it to Sage's birthday so I can at least drop off the present, huh?"
He stood from the bench, pulling his dress shirt down, "a'right then. I know you have to rush so just a quick goo'bye but remember, anytime you wanna come down sis', you're welcome."
She was pulled into one of her older brother's bear hugs where she, for a moment, wished she could come home. But the moment ended and she nodded at her brother, "text me..."
"When I get to there, when I get out and when I make it home."
"Yeah," Fin said, pridefully with no shame, "you know the drill, now, be safe and don't do drugs."
She laughed as she turned away from him, "not really something I had in mind Fin. Gotta run. Catch up with you later."
So, she left him, her coat billowing out behind her and tempting her even further to turn back and glance at him. But she didn't, because she didn't want to change her mind about leaving.
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It took longer than usual to get off of the Verrazano and she was quick to realise why. Cars were being let through slowly as three cops signalled them through and stopped one every now and then. She was signalled.
"License and registration please."
She handed them over with no further comment alongside her badge but she apparently surprised the man hovering over her window, "you're on the force?" he asked, curious, "what's bringin' ya' down? All the way from Cali?"
"Just a birthday party and some politics," she told him as he handed the items back to her, "thanks."
"Well, everything seems to be in order Miss. Keep on your way and I assume I don't need to talk to you about speeding?"
She smiled, "no, you don't."
Sage McGonal had been Amara's friend since the first grade, but time had passed and it had been more than awhile since she'd seen her. But, they'd always kept in touch. When they'd had time they'd been able to skype but when time got busy, they settled for chat over text.
She knew that Sage would like her present. It was her twenty fifth, a big day, so the dress, the necklace and the scrapbook had been chosen and Amara had paid meticulous attention to detail. She'd pushed the good memories into those plastic pouches in the hopes that Sage would always, always remember. The time they went to the fair, got cut in line and then were given double portions of cotton candy. The first time Sage had put on make up and had come out looking like a bloody snowman.
Good memories.
Sage was her soulmate. Both of them had their problems but they'd always been able to confide to each other. When Sage had come out, when her parents had been disappointed that she was different, Sage had spoken to Amara. And when Amara had learned that the man that she'd wanted to marry was really, nothing, like who she thought he was, Sage was the shoulder she could cry on.
So for a moment, when she reached the house, when she saw the flames, when she heard the screams. She thought, maybe... maybe if I turn back, if I don't ask, if I don't look, if I don't go... it'll be okay. But she went, she heard, she saw, and that day, she lost a half of her soul.