A/N I know this storyline is getting tiresome. I am just running out of new Burzek stories but very interested about the promo for 7x19 hmm wonder what is going on with Adam...This is my take on it.
He wouldn't say he was avoiding Kim, they just hadn't spoken since she gave him the hockey tickets. He couldn't figure out why she had given them to him in the first place.
This was the first night they were able to have off in awhile now, most of the team was heading to Molly's. He noticed Kim ducked out a bit early, he didn't get a chance to ask her if she would be coming out tonight. She hadn't been out since the miscarriage, at least with the team anyway. Their personal relationship had been halted and he didn't know how or if he should attempt to rekindle it. Kim seemed very hesitant to go there again so he was just trying to respect her boundaries.
Kim was panicking, she had a date tonight, she reluctantly agreed to go out with some guy her sister had been wanting to set her up with. She knew she wasn't ready for anything beyond dinner and maybe drinks. She could barely speak to Adam, let alone a stranger, she was only going to shut her sister up. She knew the rest of the team was going to Molly's, she would head there after dinner.
Kim said she would meet, Drew, at the restaurant. She luckily fit into her black dress and her comfortable but great looking black heels. She was a few minutes late, he was already sitting at the table waiting for her. He stood as she approached the table, he was at least cute, she would have to thank her sister for that.
"Hi, Drew? Kim, sorry I am late." Kim said as she shook his hand.
"Yes, hi Kim, no worries. It's good to finally meet you, I have heard a lot about you." Drew said.
"Oh, all good things I hope." Kim smiles. She already is dreading this.
Drew smiles back. Kim needs wine, lots of it...
Adam is with the team at Molly's, Kim hasn't shown up yet. Not that he was watching for her but he guesses it was noticeable as Kevin leans in to comment.
"Doubt she will be out tonight, dawg."
Adam hangs his head. "I know, just haven't had a chance to talk lately."
Kevin just nods feeling for the former couple.
Dinner with Drew didn't go as poorly as she thought.
He was in insurance but surprisingly not boring. He had travelled and was very into rock climbing. No kids, never been engaged, no drama that she could find.
Kim had left out the baby stuff and thankfully her sister had too. He didn't ask about it anyway. Her profession had intrigued him and not scared him away like it would most other men.
She was considering a second date with him as they were walking out to their vehicles when he made a move.
Drew's hand moved from her lower back, on the way out, to her hand.
"I had a great time tonight, Kim." Drew smiles as his grip tightened on her wrist.
"Me too." Kim replies tensely. She glances down at her wrist as Drew leans in to kiss her. Kim jerks back, catching Drew off guard.
"What are you doing?"Kim asks harshly as she grabs her wrist to her chest.
"Sorry, I thought I was picking up some signals." Drew smirks.
"No, I was considering a second date but not now." Kim says horrifically. She backs herself into the restaurant again. Adrenaline pumping as she watches Drew getting into a vehicle to leave.
Kim quickly makes her way to her car and heads towards Molly's. She really doesn't want to be alone tonight, she hopes her team is still out.
Her heart is still pounding in her chest as gets out of her car, all but running to the entrance of Molly's.
She sees Kevin's large figure at a table near the back and all but runs to him. Adam sees her and notices the wild look in her eyes, he is ready to go to her, as she bounds up to Kevin as she tries to fit her arms around his large figure.
"Burgess, I didn't think you would make it." Kevin says surprised. She uses the hug to close her eyes and wills herself to calm down.
Kim pulls away slightly. "Um, yeah I had this thing to be at but wanted to swing by before I headed home." She says as she tries to pass off her reaction. "We haven't all been out in ages, was hoping you all would still be here." Kim smiles.
Kim finally notices Adam, her heart starts racing once again. She hopes he can't still read her, she knows how that must of looked. She glances around the table looking for a seat, the only open one was next to Adam. She slips into it quickly, waiting for someone to come take her drink order.
"Hey, how are you?" Kim asks Adam and she nervously scans the bar for a waitress.
"Better than you clearly, you look like you have seen a ghost, everything ok?" Adam says and he cocks his head to the side straining to get a good look at her.
"Yeah, yeah just out of breath I had to park a fair bit down the street." Kim explains. She knows he isn't buying it but he lets it go.
"What are you drinking? I am out so I'll go grab them from the bar." Adam leans in to her.
"Just a beer, thanks." Kim says as Adam gets up to go get their drinks. She stands up and shrugs her jacket off, revealing her black cocktail dress.
Kevin gives a low whistle and asks "damn girl, what were you up to?"
"Oh, some friends just had a dinner party." She answers smoothly as she glances down at herself. She thinks Kevin has bought her answer thankfully.
Adam returns with their drinks and as she reaches for her glass, he notices the reddish purple marking along her wrist.
Kim winces as she turns her wrist, quickly switching hands mid reach.
"What happened there?" Adam gestures to her arm.
"Oh, caught a punch blocking my face the other day." Kim quickly blurts out as she looks down at her arm she has brought down to her lap.
"Ah" Adam replies. He takes a swig of beer and watches her. She knows he doesn't believe her but he won't go there.
Thankfully, Kim has calmed down by the time they are all ready to leave. She says her goodbyes and decides she better hit the bathroom before heading home. When she comes out Adam is standing in the hallway with her coat.
She tilts her head at him with a slightly furrowed brow, silently asking why he was still here.
"I just wanted to make sure you were actually ok." He says answering her silent question, gesturing towards her arm.
"Actually no, I haven't been since everything. Would you mind coming over tonight?" Kim asks hopeful.
Adam looks like a dear in the headlights at her request. Kim quickly backtracks.
"Not like that, just talking?" Kim reassures him and herself.
"Oh, ok." Adam says, the relief flooding him a little.
Adam follows her out of the bar and to a waiting Uber. The ride to her place is quiet and awkward. He side glances at Kim, unsure if she feels the same way. She is staring out the window seemingly oblivious.
Kim has never felt this awkward around Adam. She can feel something has shifted with them, she is regretting asking him home with her. All she can do is stare out the window while wringing her hands hidden in her lap.
The Uber pulls up to Kim's apartment and they both get out, the awkward ride over both sobering them up slightly. Kim unlocks her door and she holds it open for Adam, and closes it once he has made it to the living room.
Kim speaks first, "Adam, I don't know why this suddenly got so tense and awkward. If you want to leave, feel free, I am sorry for dragging you all the way here." She sighs deeply.
Adam just shakes his head shoving his hands in his pockets and rocks back on his heels. "No, I think we need this, What happened tonight?" Adam flops on the couch as Kim moves to the chair to sit close to him.
"I was on a date..." Kim starts hesitantly, feeling out Adam's reaction to her statement but his facial expression is unreadable.
Now staring at her feet Kim continues, "It was going well until we were about to leave, I think he thought he would be coming home with me tonight, he got a bit rough and I had to set him straight." She glances up at Adam and she can see his jaw clenching and unclenching as they rest on his fisted hands, listening to her speak.
"I am not ready to be back in that world yet. It made me realize that I had what I wanted and I threw it away." Kim says blinking back tears and looking Adam in the eye. His hands have now dropped to his thighs while his eyes stare right back at her.
"Kim" Adam starts, "I appreciate the sentiment but this last round with us, if you can even call it an us, wore me out. I can't do this again, we have always just come back to each other because it's easy and familiar. I have never stopped loving you, never stopped wanting you, never stopped hoping that this time was the time you would feel all that back for me. Even you carrying our baby didn't make you want to try with me again." Adam chuckles at the thought. "I deserve better than that, I deserve someone who wants me, who wants a family with me, who loves me as much as I love them. Everything that happened made me realize what I want, I wanted all of it with you and you didn't seem to want it with me. So Kim, I am letting you off." Throwing her own words back in her face.
Both have tears flowing down their faces.
"I wanted you to hear it from me, believe me this is not how I thought it would happen but here it goes, I met someone and I think it could go somewhere and I want to follow it through, I'm sorry, Kim." Adam watches Kim as she wipes her tears and sniffles.
She nods, "that's great, Adam." She chokes out trying to hold back a sob.
"Thanks." He replies.
Kim wants to desperately ask what she is like but she doesn't. He is right, she has done all the things he said, maybe she has just been doing this because it is easy and familiar.
"Well I should probably get going." Adam says as he gets up and moves to the door.
"Yeah, thanks for coming." Kim replies politely. "I'll see you at work." She smiles her lips only forming a tight line.
He glances back at her before he closes the door to her apartment and he reaches to stroke his hand down the side of her face. Kim leans her head into his hand, he can't help himself he moves closer to place one last kiss to the top of her head. Kim's eyes close taking in all the things that she will never get to experience again.
He pulls away and Kim feels like the world drops out from beneath her.
Adam mutters one last "Goodbye, Darlin." as he closes her door and her dam breaks. She slides down the door and is curled up with her knees tucked tight into her chest and she cries. It really is over, she has lost him forever.
A/N : In a way I hope this is what happens, she is starting to play too many games with him. He is genuinely a great guy and I don't know why Kim can't just accept him or thinks that he isn't for her. She can't keep flip flopping.