A/N:Hello all! Welcome to my first story! I'm not much of a writer, but i hope you enjoy this story anyway!
Disclaimer: I don't own the show or any of the characters, that righteous title goes to Eric Kripke. Btw sorry this chapter is so short, I'm working on new chapters..-_-
Sam: Age 14
Dean: Age 18
John: Age unknown -_- (srry)
The Thoughts of Sam Winchester
Sam Winchester felt as if he didn't belong. His dad and older brother were hunters, and enjoyed it. Sam never enjoyed hunting. He wanted to go to college and have a normal apple pie life, but his father would never let him and he didn't want to leave Dean. Dean, he was Sam's whole world. He cared for him in a way their father never could. He took care of him when he was sick, was proud of him when he got good grades. Overall, Dean was the best parent/older brother/best friend Sam could ever ask for. He never told anyone how he felt. He was too scared to hear what his family might think. 'Weak' 'unstable' 'Not family' He already knew that about himself, did he really need the people he cares about the most saying it to him? He let the tears fall as he slowly slid his blade down his arm.
"Sam! You ready yet? Hurry up! Dads waiting for us!" Dean yelled to his little brother. His little brother sammy. He knew that something was wrong with sam. Call it his sixth sense or Big Bro Intuition, but he just knew. Their dad didn't understand Sam was well he did. "Yeah, I'm coming Dean!" He heard Sam yell. 'What's up with you sammy?'
Sam didn't know what to do. Blood was rushing down his arm and fast. He had to clean this up in about , what? FIVE minutes? 'Oh god. Oh god what did i do? Dean's gonna kill me' Sam cleaned as fast as he possibly could without drawing any suspicion from Dean. "Sam! Get your ass down here!" "Uh yeah Dean! I'm just brushing my hair!" 'hopefully he bought that' Sam thought as he waited for a response " Yah, yeah Samantha! Just hurry up kay?" His voice cracks from relife "Y-yeah yeah, Dean! Thanks!" Sam quickly cleaned up the self inflicted wound running down from his shoulder to his elbow. 'Well, looks like only sweatshirts and long sleeved from now on' Sam though bitterly as he tried pushing that sick, sick feeling. He couldn't describe it, but when he ran that knife down his arm, he, he liked it and was absolutely disgusted with himself. He finished cleaning and dressing his wound and threw away any proof of what he just did.
Sam went downstairs to his waiting brother. "Finally Sammy, I was starting to think you were growing a new head'a hair in there." Dean said as he saw Sam walk downstairs. "Sam? You there man?" Sam snapped out of his thought and was greeted with Deans worried face." Uh yeah, Dean. 'Course I'm ok!" Sam said with the fakest smile ever. "Just spacin out." Dean didn't look convinced for a second, but then masked it with a typical Dean grin. " Wow Sammy, maybe you should get your head outta the clouds, huh?" Dean said with his usual tone. "Heh, yeah maybe i should." Sam said silently thanking whatever god was up there. Sam started walking out the door to where the impala was waiting. 'Sammy, whats goin on?' Dean thought bitterly to himself as he watched Sam's retreating figure.
End of chapter one.