By Grandpa Norlander
Little Bo Peep has lost her sheep and doesn't know where to find them.
Leave them alone and they won't come home, 'cause Chuck Norris is sure to find them.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall,
Chuck Norris had scrambled eggs and lamb chops for breakfast.
Itsy Bitsy Spider climbed up Chuck Norris' snout.
Down came the fist and wiped the spider out.
Chuck Norris does not like spiders.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water.
Chuck broke Jack's crown and pushed him down,
And round house kicked Jill who came tumbling after.
Chuck Norris does not like people stealing his water.
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, eating her curds and whey.
Along came I spider, and sat down beside her, then Chuck Norris Round house kicked it away.
I told you, Chuck Norris does not like spiders.
Baa Baa Black Sheep have you any wool?
Yes sir, yes sir, 20 bags full,
One for my master, One for the Dame, And the rest for Chuck Norris, so he doesn't round house kick us down the lane.
Little Jack Horner Sat in a Corner Because Chuck Norris put him there!
Hididdle diddle, the cat and the fiddle Chuck Norris threw the cow over the moon.
Then Chuck ate Jack Horners cake, with the knife, the fork and the spoon
Jack be nimble,
Jack be quick,
But it won't do you any good Chuck Norris will, just as he should,
give you a round house kick.
There was an old woman who lived in a shoe Had so many machine guns, she didn't know what to do.
So she gave them to Chuck who shot at some ducks,
And scared them so bad they did poo.
Jack Sprat could eat no fat,
His wife could eat no lean.
Chuck Norris will try like a cat,
To be nice and not be mean.
Peter Peter pumkin eater,
Pow! Don't eat Chuck's pumpkins
Chuck Norris likes to use the S-word,
You know, Sword
Mary had a little lamb,
I emphasize had.
Chuck Norris likes lamb chops
Another Jack Sprat:
Jack Sprat could eat no fat,
His wife could eat no lean.
Chuck Norris used a baseball bat,
And their clocks he did clean.