Episode 4

It was the afternoon and the hotel was bustling. For one reason or another over two dozen patients came in at once and Charlie was losing her mind. Vaggie did her best to keep up with the demand but care work is difficult to achieve when it's 13-1. Alastor had barely been in the house for a week, and Angel Dust had been filming every day for Valentino. Husk, was Husk, so his demeanor hadn't changed a second. Everyone was stressed and tired, all except one hyperactive little pixie.

For Niffty housework was a kind of time trial. In a morning the floors were swept, windows cleaned, dishes done and meals prepared. She got rid of all of Angel's excess hair and cleaned up after Fat Nuggets. She dove into Alastor's swamp-like estate and made it sanitary. She did all of the laundry for the staff and pressed her masters' suits one by one. For a to-do list that long she cleared it up fast, and by noon everything possible had been done.

"Gotta clean this, and this and this!" she chanted to herself. "There's a spot here and here and here and here and done and there's nothing left. What's next?" She looked at her checklist again. Every piece was checked off. Another time again. "I see. So what now? What now?"

Niffty went into the refurbished ballroom to find Charlie in a classroom like environment. Her students sat there slackjawed as she went over the religious text personally transcribed for her to see if any good virtues could be squeezed out of it.

"The point I'm trying to make is," Charlie said. "Is that lying and not telling the truth are the same thing, so if you're half truthing some shit you're doing a disservice to your peers. Now, let's sing a sound about-. Uh, Niffty?"

Charlie looked down to see Niffty dusting off her pant leg with a cute little smile. She looked up with big eye. "You have great calf muscles."

"Yeah." Charlie took a step away but Niffty just followed her. "Is there something you want?"

"I've cleaned every square inch and everything is in tip top tippy toppy tip shape. Now what?"

"What?"

"What do I do now?"

"Wait for another mess?"

Niffty walked over to one of the desks and pushed some papers on the floor. "Like this?"

"No."

"You demons are so clean," Niffty complimented, rubbing one against her wishes. She got kicked into the wall for that.

"Yes, I've taught these wayward souls the meaning of good hygiene." Charlie said. "Now they are shining beacons of light in this dark world."

A guy in the back spoke up. "Every second of my life is agony."

"See?" Charlie presented it like some sort of accomplishment. Then again, Hell was known for its terrifying filth. "So yeah, just do whatever Al would ask you to do around the place. And please leave me to my work."

"Something I'd do at the old house..."

Niffty found herself on the couch watching television. Some commercial kept playing over and over again with its bad jingle and strange messaging. By the forty five minute mark she couldn't keep watching them over and over again. She pulled out her sewing needle and cloth from the lounge nightstand. The ol' reliable.

"What should I sew? Anyone?" She asked the empty room. No answer was given. "I know, I'll sew a quilt. It's getting cold after all. I'm hot." She checked a mirror. "I am hot." Then she grumbled. "Not enough for men though." The party hit her self esteem rather hard. "Focus Niffty. The design, what is it?...I know! My best friends...Do they count? I think so?"

She pondered this while sewing at the same time and despite having the attention span of a small dog she spent four hours making masterpiece. She even put in all the bells and whistles to create something magnificent. Once folded out the results were lifelike: a group portrait of all of the staff, including Alastor, Charlie, Vaggie, Husk and even Angel.

"Ah there you are Niffty," Alastor said. "I see you've been hard at work today. I have a request for you if you'd be so kind to listen."

"Ooh, Mr. Al! Look, I made a quilt with everyone on it. Isn't it great?" She asked.

Alastor gave it a brief glance. "Yes yes, it's very nice. A quick inquiry. Did you happen to clean my room this morning."

"Yep, it was on the list and I did everything perfectly."

"I'm sure you did darling. Please, let me clean my room from now on. Everything is very particular in there and you almost tripped certain, ahem, countermeasures inside."

"Oh I know where they all are so you don't have to worry Mr. Alastor."

Alastor patted her on the head. "Now now deary. You know how important privacy is to me. Let's establish that, alright?" He pulled back and waited. The girl started to vibrate from the thought of not cleaning. He tapped his microphone. "Testing, testing. Did it feed through Niffty?"

"Yes, sir." Niffty kept smiling but she had taken some minor toll.

A scream came from outside followed by a pig's. Angel and Husk burst into the parlor. "Hey short stuff, Fat Nuggets is on the loose." Angel said. "Help me clean up the shit he leaving around. Also, any of you gotta net?"

"Uh, um..." She looked up at Alastor. Remember the first and foremost rule, she thought before putting a smile back on. "Sure! Let's catch a little piggy!" She blew out the door and Angel followed.

Husk went up to Alastor. "Eh, so this is where she's been all day," he said. "The fuck she been doing?"

"Looks like she's been busy stitching." Alastor held up the quilt.

"Another one?"

"Yes indeedy. I don't remember what happened to the one of the servants back home."

"That's your fucking problem." Husk gave it a good inspection. "Heh, funny how she thinks we all look so nice. Do I look this happy to you?"

"It's amazing what one see's from another perspective," Alastor said. "We may never fully understand her."

Alastor walked out. As he left the two could hear Charlie calling. "Niffty, do you know when dinner will be ready?

Husk continued to examine the pastel design. He flipped it around and puzzled over it. "She didn't put herself on this one either."

The next day came and Niffty was back in front of the television. Without Alastor's room to worry about she finished by morning and had lunch at the ready. This was unusual. The job of a housewife was never to be finished. While she rotted her brain with Hellevision she saw her quilt placed in the corner. It was wrapped up in a ball. That would not do, so pressed and folded it into a neat square. Still there was no place to place it. A teardrop fell.

"What's this? She wiped it away. "Eww that's gross. How am I supposed to be cute when I'm leaking?"

"Niffty? Hey Niffty?" Charlie called out. The parlor door opened. "Great, there you are Niffty."

Niffty turned around on the couch. She unfolded the quilt to hide her face. "I made something nice."

"Please, not right now," Charlie said. "I gotta get back to class immediately. We need groceries. Can you drop by the store and grab these things?"

Charlie handed over a list of items and a wad of cash over the quilt and in front of her face. Niffty stared at it for a second until she let go of the quilt and took the money.

"Okie dokie!" she said. "Oh boy do I need some sun I am so pale even though Hell has no sun. I'll take that. Okay bye!"

She slammed the door in a heartbeat, leaving Charlie creeped out. "What was up with her?"

Niffty got on the next bus to go through Pentagram city. The city had its way of changing every once in awhile. Some areas never changed like the aristocratic villas in the northeast point or the royal castle to the north, but the west side and the southeast looked completely different. This was likely due to the age of new residents coming in and replacing the ones lost during each extermination.

Normally the grocery store would be down the street and it would take about twenty minutes to get everything asked. That's not where Niffty was going. She was going somewhere, but nowhere certain. She just needed the bus ride to drop her off somewhere so she could take her mind off the anger building up inside her precious heart. Let it be a valuable lesson to everyone that a little disobedience once in awhile keeps the urge to stab a loved one to death with a steak knife away for awhile.

Her destination ended up being the southeast side of the pentagram. The landscape changed from diners and clubs to futuristic gadgets and fashion boutiques. Very fancy. Niffty's curiosity flourished in this new environment. She was a Luddite like Alastor, but it was more of a money problem than philosophy. The bright lights and sounds were like crack to her excitable mind and the wonders of cheap plastic phones with spotty coverage tempted her.

Inside the store an owl demonness was buying a phone with her friends."What kind of shit are you trying to pull on me? Why is there a mark up sticker on top of the mark up sticker?"

"What are you talking about?" said the imp behind the counter. His foot nudged the price labeler out of sight. "That's what it's always been marked."

"It was this price fifteen minutes ago."

"Well now it's that price. Come on, you're a rich girl. What's a little extra of daddy's money gonna hurt?"

The demonness grew twice in size. "That's a good question. Let's find out, imp."

She raised her leg and lifted it over the small red creature when a thud from outside caught their attention. The lot were presented with Niffty's face smearing against the wall.

"Can I help you?" asked the demon clerk.

Niffty went across every corner and side of the window until she disappeared from view. A few seconds later she crashed through the roof.

"Hi, I'm Niffty!" she said with debris all over her. "Everything is so pretty here and nice. How much is that thing? Or that? How much money do you need?"

"Uh, all of it." said the imp. He was ready to take the wad but then got crushed by the demonness's talon.

"I just had a thought," she said. "If we just take it we'll have more money to spend later."

The five of them were about to leave when they noticed Niffty oggling them with her puppy dog eye. "Is she just going to keep doing that?"

"Allow me to handle," said the owl demonness. "Excuse me darling, but could you be so kind as to look somewhere else? We're very important people and in quite a hurry to get to the next shop. So if you don't mind deary."

"Wow that was a great Al impression!" she replied. "Except you need to laugh more and add that American 'e' to the sound of your voice like this: 'eeeeh', 'eeeeeeeh!'"

The group was confused by this small lady. "You know the radio demon?" the owl demonness asked.

"Yesireedy."

She stood there blank faced. "What's the color of his underwear?"

"Red."

"What's his favorite thing to look at?"

"Red things."

"What does he love more than anything?"

"Himself."

She was taken aback. "Wow. I can't believe you know the Radio Demon."

"Lucky girl you," one of the friends added. "That monster is so dreamy."

"To know that the Radio Demon is so close to someone so, you."

"Yeah right?," the snake faced friend said. "Who knew the Radio Demon had associates with as little fashion as you. You look like a grandma."

"Now now Belinda," the owl demon said. "It's not grandma style, it's retro. It's a style that some of the newer Overlords are angling toward." She leaned over and reached out her hand. "Natasha's the name. Charmed."

"Hi, I'm Ni-!"

"I heard you the first time." She reached over and shook Niffty's hand, who was the size of a small toy compared to them. She then shrunk to a size that wasn't bumping against the ceiling. "Say, would you like to go shopping with us? My treat."

"Wow really? Why? What's the catch? The scheme? I'm not stupid! I swear, but yes."

"Oh just as a gesture of a good friendship."

"Hold up hold up, real quick." The friends huddled around each other and pulled in Natasha. Niffty stood a few feet away.

"Uh girl," a bat demon said. "What are you doing? That bitch has crazy written all over her. Let's bail and get some pizza."

"Please, that's not very ladylike. I am nobility." Natasha replied. "This misshapen creature is acquainted with that sexy tyrant my father is working with right now. He always says I should be more, diplomatic so to say. So I say let's play dress up for a day, squeeze all of the juicy details out of her, dump her off back home and then we get pizza." She walked over to Niffty and picked her up by the dress. "Alright kid, let's get you something nice."

"Yay!" Niffty wiggled in place as she was brought over to the higher class side of town.