Disclaimer: We do not own Naruto, no matter how much we wish we did
Title: Don't Procreate without Protection
Summary: So yea. Boruto and Sarada created a literal god. Now lets see how that went.
RinneShariByakuTenseigan. I don't think I can even pronounce this shit. Anyways, a friend and I thought it would be a good idea to make this bullshit. Enjoy! Or not, I don't care.
Flash forward to when Sarada is going through the labor of going through labor. Boruto held his wife's hand and after a few minutes, a literal god was born. Of course, they didn't know that other than the massive wave of chakra that shifted the planet out of orbit by 20 inches and pulled the moon so close that the sea was starting to look like the sky. The land of the waves for a split second atomized, while the land of the sea flash boiled, all together killing hundreds of people.
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Old man Fish-Cake San. We finally got to where the fandom didn't want us to go. Anyways, Naruto is about to die but don't worry, this is just some shit fanfiction.
"Naruto-kun, any last wishes?" Hinata cried out, holding her husband's hand.
"Uhhh… Can you delete my browser histor-" he ded.
On the sidelines, Sasuke quietly muttered, "This is so sad, Alexa play Sadness and Sorro-."
Sasuke's head slumped forward. Hinata rushed over to him.
"Sasuke-San you alright?" Hinata asked.
Activating byakugan, Hinata realized that Sasuke's heart stopped beating.
"Dammit Kira*…" she muttered under her breath.
After realizing that Naruto was ded, Hinata remembered that Kurama was supposed to emerge in about….. 5 minutes. Hinata rushed Naruto's body outside of the hospital to Training Grounds 666. After a bit of waiting, there was a bright flash. Kurama had emerged.
"Heya Kurama!" Hinata exclaimed.
"I- I'm free?" Kurama inquired.
"For a bit…." Hinata whispered. Hinata then led Kurama to where Boruto's "child" was "born".
"TIME FOR SEALING 4.0 BISH," Hinata exclaimed and sealed Kurama in Boruto's "child".
"FUCKyyou not again," Kurama yelled as he was sealed.
After realizing that Sasuke also got deded, Hinata quickly did some grave robbing, Grade SSS+ surgery and boom. 3 minutes later, Hinata had 2 eyes, one sharingan, two byakugan, and one rinnegan.
"S-s-so much power. I can use PAIN TRAIN, the kage bunshin is superior tho… Oh well, I'll cope with this."
A quick chakra burst alerted Hinata to the following danger and with the intensity of the blast, all four eyes popped like water balloons, Hinata slumping to the ground in pain. With no eyes at all, she deded herself to be with Naruto-Kum who was already with his ho Sasgay in Ninja heaven.
The baby then cast a genjutsu on everyone in the hospital, making them think they had already vaccinated the baby and shit.(i'mnotaantivaxxeriswear) However one nurse didn't get the memo, and stuck the needle inside the baby.
The baby then yelled, "RinneShariByakuTenseigan! You are in my line of you're so fucked!"
The hospital began to shake and the eyes of the baby had become a mess of colors. The masonry crumbles, while the nurse gapes in shock. Boruto and Sarada rush to comfort the baby.
"Chibaku-Amaterasu-Kage-Twin-Tailed-Bijuu-Dama-Rasen-Shuriken!" the baby yelled while doing hand seals.
The night sky glowed with the power of GTFO, the sun suddenly rising and the moon became black with flames. Sarada then threw the curtains open.
'OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH SHIT' was the collective thought of the entire world as the moon came hurling to the ground.
When it finally did, the world stopped. The camera zooms out, the earth still spinning in place, when suddenly the Earth aquires a second asshole and the world explodes, chunks of it flying across the great expanse of space.
Two giant vertical white lines appeared and the catastrophe stopped. A white box appeared in space.
Delete world permanently? |
Are you sure you want to delete "What the Fuck is This" |
| This world will be lost forever! (A long time) |
|_Delete_ |
|_Cancel_|
A white flash appeared and when the reader looked back, there was nothing. Not even the emptiness of space was there. As the reader closes the tab for the fanfiction, their eyes open, revealing a hideous abomination of patterns strewn across the eyes.
"Remember kids….use protection!"