Well, helloooo, hello, hello! It's been 84 years… since I've written something that was not work-related :D - Sheesh, I've become very rusty at this…
Ahem, ahem… Take two:
So, hello my darling readers, here I am again. Writing a Dramione fanfiction for you to hopefully enjoy! Very much in contrast to "The Blood Letter", which was very dark themed, this story is going to be rather humorous. Very light hearted, sometimes a tad bit cheesy, but regardless! I hope you enjoy.
Just for caution, I'm going to be rating this story as M. –There shouldn't be anything too graphic, eventually the characters will swear and get drunk, but just in case some scenes get too gross or detailed… I'm sticking to that rating.
Please note I'm from Germany and English is my second language, so there will probably be some minor mistakes.
Enjoy your reading, and hopefully you'll have a laugh! x
The Nanny Who Lived
Chapter I: Childbirth
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It was a very special day: The day little Scorpius was born.
Hermione thought that giving birth in the Wizarding World was going to be different than in the Muggle World. Innocent her, she thought she would be given a potion, and a birth-giving spell would be cast on her pregnant belly, and so, her baby boy would be born. No contractions, no pain, no pushing. What a pure, innocuous thought.
It was just like in the Muggle movies she had seen in her teenage years: There was moaning, screaming and nurses rushing everywhere. And yes, just like in those movies, the midwife taking care of a healthy birth course was being encouraging and annoying the hell out of her:
"Come on, Hermione, you're doing so well! Push!" The woman said, "Push!"
The nerve of that obstetrician!
"HAS A DEMENTOR SUCKED YOUR EYES OUT, LADY!? I AM PUSHING!"
It wasn't Hermione talking: It was childbirth. As soon as she came to her senses, she apologised for her harsh words.
"Oh my goodness, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I don't mean it like tha—"
And as soon as the force of the contraction hit her, it was childbirth overwhelming her right mind once again:
"-Oh, for the love of FUCK!"
"I can see the head!"
"YOU HAVE BEEN SAYING THIS FOR OVER AN HOUR! AM I BIRTHING A HAIR BALL!?"
Really, that poor nurse was only trying to cheer her up. Obviously, being that she had helped other women through childbirth, she was used to being harshly yelled at, and at a certain point in her career, the experienced practitioner had learned to smile it off and keep doing her work.
"Push! Come on, just give me one more push!"
"I SAID I AM PUSHING! SWEET AND HOLY MOTHERFUCKING MERLIN."
Draco… Well. Draco had known Hermione for a very long time, and knew well enough when to keep his mouth shut. Of course, there would be uplifting words every now and then, things like "You can do it" or "almost there!" Additionally, her husband was wiping the sweat off her forehead. But seeing the state his wife was in, the blonde preferred, for his own safety, to only let out light-hearted, bright phrases when necessary. Which was often enough! - He wanted and needed to be supportive for Hermione. And being supportive as he was, the Slytherin held the Gryffindor's hand and caressed her thumb in a reassuring manner.
The medical assistant tried to convince Hermione to press once more:
"Okay, we're going for one final thrust, you're almost there. Take a deep breath in!" Hermione did as commanded, "And a ten second push!"
The young man tried to help as well.
"Come on, you can do this, Hermione!"
Hermione glared at him.
"I CAN DO THIS, BUT YOU CAN'T DO ME AGAIN."
"That..." Draco was left quite speechless, and so his brain had to improvise a sentence that was not going to upset her any further, "…That's the spirit?"
Just at that very instant, Lucius and Narcissa had apparated themselves in the room with a little special something. They wouldn't have wanted to miss their grandchild's welcome to the world.
"I heard Muggles enjoy this dish. It may help you with your recovery, as it has carbohydrates. I heard they have good energy value." The witch said, while holding the bowl, "What was it called, again? Sungetti, spetetti…? Oh dear, I only recall the brand's name: 'Mom'."
Lucius tuned in to Narcissa's train of thought and also started to list random names for that very specific kind of pasta.
"Maybe 'Stundetti', darling?" Lucius offered.
"No, no dearest, not quite that… It ended on 'etti', that I know!"
Hermione couldn't take it any longer. It was too much of a stupid situation to ignore.
"YOU MUST BE KIDDING ME! YOU'RE DISCUSSING A TYPE OF PASTA WHILE A BABY IS COMING OUT OF MY VAGINA?" She yelled, fuming, "ARE YOU SERIOUS?"
Lucius gasped and raised an eyebrow, as he had misunderstood her last question.
"Dear, Sirius died quite some time ago…"
Before the brunette could say anything else, another contraction hit her.
Stress, surprise and disbelief were all visible on Draco's face. The blonde was at a total loss of words, his jaw dropped and all he could do was shake his head in incredulity. On one hand, his parents had come without prior notice, and at that, with a bowl of Italian noodles on their hands. On the other literal hand, he was holding Hermione, checking on her, and trying to witness the birth of his child. On an additional note, the midwife was very clearly holding back a giggle. – It was a very surreal, and certainly embarrassing situation.
Neverminding the circumstances, Narcissa and Lucius carried on with their witty debate.
Rolling his eyes and intending to ignore the ridiculous scene that was taking place, Draco checked on Hermione once again. Hermione's groans were getting louder. And her grip on his hand was very firm. He could feel from the increasing tightness of her grasp, that that one contraction kept going stronger and stronger. And right there and then, both of them knew, the baby was almost there.
"Sadetti?"
Placing a kiss on her temple, Draco inspected her appearance: She seemed exhausted. Her hair was messy, her face was red, some veins were to be seen on her forehead, that was how hard she was pushing. Palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms were heavy…
"MOM'S SPAGHETTI!" Narcissa shouted suddenly.
Pop!
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That first cry.
Draco and Hermione remembered very vividly. After hours of contractions, tears, sweat and screams, baby Scorpius was finally there with them. After nine months of gestation, after nine months of patience, their tiny bundle of joy had arrived.
That first time holding him in her arms.
Exhausted and excited, overjoyed and very carefully, Hermione held her newborn in her loving embrace. She cried and laughed at the same time as she was rocking him and welcoming him to the world, a sense of happiness rushed through her spine. She had so much love to give, and felt so motherly.
With a notable sense of pride and delight, Draco's heart melted as he saw his son in his wife's hold. With a bright smile on his face, and a tear in the corner of his eye, Draco slightly caressed his baby's platinum hair that looked so much like his.
It was the perfect picture: Scorpius was so small, and he looked so safe in his mother's arms. In a loving and synchronous motion, Draco kissed Hermione's head as she kissed her baby's temple.
And then, the realization hit them: They had just become parents. They now had to take responsibility for that tiny wizard. And it was such a heart-warming, loving, yet scary recognition.
And they were happy.
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Grandparents. The elderly people that took care of their grandchildren and allowed the spoils that the parents didn't agree with. Chocolate frogs? Bertie Bott's? Jelly Slugs? Name it. The grandparents were the ones with whom the grandchildren loved spending their time with.
Lucius and Narcissa were thrilled with baby Scorpius. He was the spitting image of Draco when he had been born: Platinum blonde hair and a grumpy little face. Delightful. Adorable. Malfoylicious.
"Congratulations, dear." Narcissa looked at her son, "You are going to be an amazing father, I'm sure of it. And you did an excellent job, Hermione, darling. I am certain that you will excel at being a mother, as well."
Lucius nodded in agreement at his wife's statement and congratulated the pair. The older man then proceeded to hand over the plate of pasta to the new mother.
Hermione giggled, handed Scorpius over to Draco, and took the dish. As she was eating, she wondered:
"I just need to know how you came to the idea of coming to witness the birth of your grandchild with a bowl of spaghetti."
"Well…" Narcissa put her hand on her chin, as if she was looking for a plausible answer.
The family laughed it off. Maybe it was for the best.
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HEEEEEEELLLOOOOOOOO!
Well, that was the first chapter! :D Hope you liked it! I have to admit, I actually had a lot of fun while writing this. Maybe a tad bit too much, haha :D
Don't worry, the next chapters will be longer, hopefully. I'm just giving you a slow start, as I don't want to forcefully fill in every chapter too much, otherwise I feel like it's hard to read.
I'm hoping that I'll come with chapter 2 soon! x
Thanks for reading guys! You rock! :) x
Skyselisse