Drumming Noise

"Tch, about time you woke up."

When Izuku fully opens his eyes, he is greeted to the sight of Kacchan's glorious naked chest. "G'morning, nerd." Izuku's line of vision travels to the source of sound, only to meet eyes with Kacchan himself, laying on his side with his head perched on his hand. He smirks at him, knowingly.

Izuku swallows. "Kacchan," he says, because he can't seem to connect with his brain right now; the 'error' sign prancing around like an overexcited cat. It's bad enough Kacchan renders him speechless by simply being in his proximity. Kacchan now is creating explosions in head like he owns the place.

"Kept me waiting long enough," he sighs. Then, Kacchan shifts his weight, pushes Izuku flat on his back and holy moly climbs on top of him.

Izuku simply lies there, paralyzed.

Kacchan situates himself parallel to Izuku and makes himself comfortable. Izuku tries to look up as best as he could with his current position, because looking down is bad for his heart and -uhm- something else. Yes, the headboard is preferable to the perfect view of-

"Eyes on me, Deku." Kacchan grabs each one of Izuku's wrists and guides his hands from their place on his sides to rest on his waist. Izuku meets Kacchan's fiery red eyes and feels his face explode in heat. The intensity of the look on Kacchan face, and the feeling of their bodies flush together, forces him to avert his gaze again. Izuku yelps, butterflies threaten to erupt from his throat.

"Stop running." Kacchan growls and slams both elbows to either sides of Izuku's face, caging his head between his biceps. It absolutely does not help that Kacchan's upper body is very well-built with impressively toned arms. Having been stripped of options, Izuku finds himself staring into Kacchan's sharp features, drinking up the beauty of his…everything, and feeling the warmth of being enveloped around him. He's trapped. "That's what you want, isn't it?"

"I'm- Kacchan, I-."

"Why don't you do something about it then, huh?" Kacchan edges closer, and Izuku can feel his breath on his lips. His hands tighten around his waist. "You know better than anybody how much I hate waiting."

A beat of silence stretches between them, breaths quietly mingling. Kacchan makes a harsh sound at the back of his throat.

"Dammit, shitty Deku. Make a move already. I fucking dare you."

And, without a second thought, Izuku dives in to capture Kacchan's lips.

"Hmm, Kacchan."

Izuku wakes up to a pillow stuffed to his face and wrapped in his arms, and not in fact, Kacchan. Hm, so it was another dream after all. Disappointing, but not surprising.

He gets up to get ready for his day feeling more energized than usual for a 5am start. Starting his morning by seeing Kacchan is always bound to leave him in a pleasantly good mood. Yes, dream-Kacchan may not be real-Kacchan, but any Kacchan is better than no Kacchan at all, in Izuku's opinion. Besides, dream-Kacchan has his perks; Izuku can't complain. He does, however, feel a jab of guilt for objectifying Kacchan in his dreams like this, but he barely has any control over dream-Izuku when dream-Kacchan is involved, so really, it is a losing battle, anyway. So, he makes it a point to be extra respectful towards real-Kacchan in the meantime to atone for his traitorous subconscious mind.

Izuku powers through his morning routine, feeling optimistic about his day. His patrol partner is Kirishima, who is both efficient and a pleasure to have for company. Their shift is unremarkable at first until they clash with a street gang of 15 or so members. Their combat skills are mediocre, but they use their numbers to their advantage, hoping it will overwhelm the duo. Not the fair fight Izuku and Kirishima are looking for, but when is that the case? Izuku finds that his demeanor helps carry him well throughout the fight, as he pulls on his stamina reserves less violently than usual. Not only does he control the situation before backup arrives, but he also manages to wrap everything up just as his shift was ending, an unusual, yet welcome feat.

It was a good day, really, which was alarming enough to leave him slightly suspicious. He waits for the inevitable turn of events to hit him like a falling boulder.

And, it does come.

In the form of a phone call.

He is in the locker putting his hero costume away, when the phone vibrates in his pocket. He pulls it out as he balances the duffel bag on his shoulder and looks at the screen. Hm, an unsaved local number. Unusual. He presses answer.

"Hello?"

"Deku! Hi, it's me, Melissa. Long time no see," a chirpy voice comes from the other line.

It takes him a second and then a smile climbs its way to his face. "Melissa, it's so nice to hear from you! It's been a while. How have you been?"

"Pretty good. Just landed here in Japan, actually. I'm on my way to the hotel right now. The 27th Annual Hero Support Technology conference is running this entire week and I was lucky to be invited to give a talk about our latest invention. Just thought it'll be a good opportunity to see you." She lets out an airy laugh. "So, you free this weekend?"

Izuku hums, giving it a thought. Kirishima waves him goodbye, mouthing 'see ya later' as he takes his leave. Izuku absentmindedly waves back.

Misinterpreting his silence, Melissa speaks again, "I know it's such short notice, but I don't fly to Japan often anymore, and I would love to see you again. Hard to believe the last time we hung out was almost 4 months ago."

"Oh, it's okay. I don't think I will be working Saturday, and I could probably take Sunday off. Whatever time suits you is fine by me. And, wow, has it really been that long since my internship?" Chuckling to himself, he swings his locker close and sits on the bench to put his shoes on, balancing the phone between his shoulder and ear.

"Perfect! I've already booked you and your boyfriend a room at the hotel. I saw his name on the invite list, so I thought I'll go ahead and get you two a reservation in advance. It's not terribly far from your agency so it should be a nice weekend getaway. I even added a special guest plus one package so you can bring one of your friends. What do you say?"

"Melissa, you really don't have to-" He short circuits, almost dropping his phone to the ground. Hold on, what was that first part again? He really hopes it's the wax collecting in his ear making him hear funny things. "um, ah, who d-did you say I could bring with me?"

"A friend and their plus one. Oh, and your boyfriend, of course."

His what?

He straightens up, confused panic settling in the forefront of his mind. As far as Izuku knows, he does not have a boyfriend. How can Melissa speak so confidently about a partner that clearly does not exist? He rakes his brain trying to remember if there is any weird rumor about him flying around in the media lately and comes back blank. Surely, he should have some idea about this proposed relationship considering- oh.

Oh no.

And then it hits him. The falling boulder.

He gulps, "oh, you mean Kacchan?"

"Yes, and I understand you like to keep your personal life private, so I checked and the press coverage for the event is minimal. Hopefully, you'll get to enjoy your time without anyone bothering you for a scoop." Her laugh echoes through the speakers again.

And because he is both a coward and a fool, he replies, "of course!" His voice comes out shrill and jittery, his mind going on full panic mode. He can barely focus on this conversation anymore.

"Okay, you can call me on this number while I'm here. I'll text you the timetable of the event and location. Let me know if your boyfriend can make it or not…"

Oh yes, his boyfriend. The person whom Izuku is currently dating. His long-term partner. Izuku's significant other. Kacchan.

"…Alright, see you then!"

Izuku zones back in, eyes still wide in terror, "Bye!"

Should Izuku have been more aware of how certain terms translate and are interpreted in English? Maybe. Should he have been more careful using the word 'partner' when referring to his childhood friend in the context of a conversation about significant others? Probably. Should he have asserted himself more strongly when he was misunderstood by his friends and colleagues later on? Okay listen- so he might have made an itty bitty tiny mistake. It isn't even that bad. He can totally fix this. Absolutely.

Yes, Izuku is royally screwed.

To put it simply, this is all a rolling snowball of misunderstandings that went on for longer than it was socially acceptable for Izuku to correct. So, now the snowball is horrifically massive, and he can't run away from it anymore.

You see, he doesn't exactly remember the conversation that went down when this fuckup started. He was on his month-long internship in America and all what he recalls is that, back then, his English was subpar at best, which led to the very unfortunate, very wrong idea that he was somehow dating his childhood best friend. He didn't even realize his mistake at the time. Not until it was brought up again in a casual discussion, and Izuku just blanked, too surprised to correct Melissa, nodding bashfully. The second time it was mentioned, he tried to clear the misconception around him and Kacchan's relationship but was rudely interrupted by an emergency call. That third time he was too vague to make a lot of sense, so he just brushed himself off out of pure embarrassment. The time after that didn't happen, because by then it was too late.

Izuku is not a coward, he tells himself. He is just awkward and maybe a tiny bit socially inept. The point is, he didn't think an error as measly and harmless as this would amount to anything in the grand scheme of things. It was one of those passing lapses that will fade with time and he'll never have to deal with again, right?

Wrong.

He's currently stuck trying to fake a boyfriend (and not just any boyfriend), for a conference weekend to prove to his friend that this hypothetical relationship is, in fact, very real.

Or he could just tell Melissa the truth.

And handle the utter humiliation of his inadequate conversational skills.

And the mortifying explanation of this months-long misunderstanding.

God, why did he wait so long to say something?

Standing outside the door of Kacchan's apartment first thing the next morning, Izuku thinks he must be out of his ever-loving mind to think this is a good idea.

He essentially forced himself between a rock and a hard place leaving him with only two viable options. Explaining the situation to Melissa and asking her to cancel the reservations she made for the weekend or trying his luck with Kacchan to see if he'll agree to the arrangement in favor of a free hotel stay. Oh, and saving face, that too.

Fairly speaking, him and Kacchan have been on much better terms ever since their last year at UA. Izuku may even dare to call what they have a 'friendship'. They're on different agencies, yes, but they often liaise on big missions. Sparing matches, shared training spaces, and the occasional meal out with friends keep them in frequent contact, which Izuku is grateful for. They saved one another countless of times and got each other's backs in the toughest of battles; Izuku certainly can't ask for a better hero partner.

(Partner. Here is that word again.)

He considers this as he rings the bell. Surely, Kacchan wouldn't greatly mind this proposition.

He hears a groan on the other side before the door is violently flung open, leaving him in the presence of the explosive blond.

Feeling like a toddler caught with the cookie jar, he exclaims, "Kacchan! Hi." His fingers twirl together. "Great day we're having, yeah?"

Kacchan gives him a blank stare. Izuku faintly hears the rain banging heavily on the roof, and offers a nervous smile hoping it covers up for his not-very-intelligent greeting. He's off to a great start.

"Deku, someone better be dying for you to come bother me after I just finished my shift." Ire is readily simmering in Kacchan's tone, giving Izuku the impression that maybe this is, in fact, a very bad idea. He is jeopardizing his safety with each passing minute.

But right now, Izuku's fear of disappointing his friend with false expectations far outweighs any fear he has of Kacchan's fury. He would rather fight off explosives than have the inevitably awkward conversation to follow with Melissa, so he continues speaking, "so there is this event happening this weekend, and I heard you were already going, so I was just wondering if you'd like to come with me as my hero partner." He gulps, "and, maybe, just maybe, only if needed, and is absolutely necessary, pretend to be my boyfriend." His voice grows smaller and smaller with every word, the last one barely audible, and he averts his gaze to fixate on his red shoes instead of the blonde's fiery eyes.

After a pregnant interval of silence, Izuku looks up only to find Kacchan studying him intently, face neutral.

Then, he goes to shut the door.

Panicking, Izuku reaches out, placing his foot in the entryway, and continues, "wait, I can explain. Just give me a chance, Kacchan!"

"Did you lose your fucking mind somewhere on your way here?" Kacchan is trying to pull the door close against Izuku's grip, but after ten seconds of struggling, he concedes just as Izuku is gaining the upper hand, "Fine, thirty seconds. Make it quick, nerd. I don't have all day."

Stepping back from the door, Izuku takes a deep breath, "okay so, when I was on my internship in America, I used to work with Melissa and this group of really cool American superheroes. My English wasn't the best back then, so I must've said something that got misinterpreted or didn't translate well. The thing is, I didn't realize that until a little while after and by then I didn't know how to correct this. I tried. I really did, but the flow of conversations never allowed me the cha-"

His mumbling is interrupted with a smack to the head.

"Breathe, you idiot. Your face was going blue."

"Sorry…"

"So, you said something dumb and now you're too chicken to own up to it."

"That's not true! I did try, but now it's too late to fix it. Melissa already made reservations for the weekend, and the conference is going to host so many important hero figures, so I can't just tell her now. It'll ruin her plans. Also, it'll make me look kind of stupid." His voice drops in volume again.

"You are stupid. What the fuck, Deku. Just tell her you fucked up."

"I can't, okay. Please help me, Kacchan. You don't really have to do much, and you get a free hotel stay with a ticket to the biggest hero support technology conference in Japan. You can also bring a friend, if you want. It will be low-profile, barely anyone there we personally know, and no media coverage. Please."

Izuku clasps his hands together and gives him his best pleading look, eyes gleaming, begging him to understand.

Kacchan looks uncharacteristically somber for a second before he asks, "What about Round Face?"

Izuku blanks for a moment, then he realizes what he's referring to. "Uraraka and I ended things a long time ago. I'm sorry; I thought you already knew." Izuku is certain his entire group of friends is aware of their breakup. Surely, Kacchan must have heard the news going around.

"Fine, I'll think about it. Give me a day."

Deku rarely ever surprises Katsuki anymore.

Sure, maybe back in their first year at UA, Deku was able to get the drop on him a few times, but things had been different then. Naturally, Deku has always been a creature of habit. He packs the same lunch every day, jogs the same route whenever he trains, shops for groceries on his way home from work in the same shop the same day every week (it's Wednesday, by the way). Katsuki can sometimes even predict what Deku is going to say before he opens his mouth. But that's only because Deku talks too much, and on occasion, forgets that he has already told him about these 'really funny' anecdotes he's so proud of. Katsuki lets him, and acts like he hasn't heard the one about 'the exploding can of beans' three times before. (That's only because he doesn'tcare though; this has nothing to do with Deku and how excited he gets when he thinks he's being funny. Katsuki doesn't care.)

It suffices to say, Deku is predictable.

So, when he knocks on his door at six in the goddamn morning, asking Katsuki to be his boyfriend -No, asking him to pretend to be his boyfriend, you can't blame Katsuki for being thrown out of balance.

(Katsuki should have said no right there and then. What was he thinking?)

His first thought was that Deku is fucking with him. Why else would he ask him? It doesn't make any fucking sense. Nevertheless, as Deku explained himself, it became plainly obvious that he just messed up. Katsuki wanted to believe this was a prank set up by Dunce Face and his squad of idiots, but the sincerity in the nerd's words conveyed how much distress the situation placed on him. Which Katsuki doesn't really get, because the solution to that problem is relatively simple. But Deku has been weird about this stuff lately, ever since the slipup he had in his televised interview a few years back. Admittedly, the nerd has never been the best at being put on the spot, but that one time had been a particular low.

Needless to say, Katsuki may not get it, but he understands. Whatever goes on in the nerd's head renders him too scared to get on with simple shit. It doesn't make sense to him, but that doesn't matter. He is not going to be the one to push him into situations that make him uncomfortable. That's not his business. The boyfriend thing however-

"Can't believe they're still going on about this, sheesh." Kirishima scoffs at the news outlet before he changes the channel. He makes himself comfortable on Katsuki's couch, stretching until he's fully lying down. "Doesn't it bother you, Bakugou?"

Katsuki ignores him in favor of mincing the garlic. Stupid Hair decided to stop by for dinner in his apartment before Katsuki starts his night shift, which is normally fine except he's being an unhelpful lazy bum right now and it's annoying.

"Woah, look at that! Midoriya went all out on those goons from yesterday. Seems like some news channels are just as impressed as I was. Gotta admire Midoriya's manly spirit when he really gets down to it." Perfect, shitty hair brought up Deku all on his own, so Katsuki has an excuse to ask his question without making it look like he's been thinking of the nerd all day, because he obviously wasn't- fuck you.

"Oi, Kirishima," he calls from the kitchen. "How come no one told me Deku and Round Face are no longer smacking faces?"

Kirishima sits up and gives him a look, completely unfazed by the ungraceful description. "Dude, they broke up months ago, before Deku headed off to the States. I'm surprised you didn't know; you hang out with Midoriya all the time."

"Don't be stupid. We work together. Why the hell would I know something like that?" Katsuki interrupts, defensively. It's not like he pries on Deku's personal life like a nosy housewife. That's beneath him.

"Besides, you get weird when we talk about…y'know." Kirishima makes vague gestures with his hands, like he has a serious case of heartburn and is trying to not puke. He walks to the kitchen and takes a seat on the stool next to Katsuki. "What brings this up all of a sudden, hm?" He shoots him a knowing smile, and Katsuki feels exposed.

So, without really thinking, he blurts out, "Deku asked me to be his trophy boyfriend for the weekend." He slams his knife on the counter, snapping the broccoli he was cutting in half. It felt oddly satisfying.

Kirishima blinks in confusion, and then lights up like a Christmas tree. He jumps on the counter, and grabs Katsuki by the shoulder, shaking him in excitement. "Bro, I'm so happy for you! Congratulation on your first ever date. Midoriya is one hunk of a guy; he's going to treat you so well." His smile is so bright and blinding, Katsuki almost feels bad for misleading him. Almost.

"It's fake. He wants me to pretend for the sake of his stupid mouth and his stupid friends and this goddamn conference weekend." He snaps back, pushing Kirishima off. He should've been clearer from the get go, but how does one go about explaining that mess?

"Wait, you mean the one being held in the Ritz-Carlton in Kyoto? The event with specialty invites to the top hero support companies in the world? Oh my gosh, bro, can I come too? Pretty Please?"

"I haven't decided if I'm going yet. Besides, my agency got an invite, so I don't need shitty Deku's permission to be there." Okay, so his agency didn't get a free hotel stay with the invite, but whatever.

"Well, you haven't said no to Midoryia yet, which means you are considering it, isn't that right?" He shoots him a toothy smile. Cheeky bastard.

"What the fuck. Of course not! Like hell I'd let myself be stupid Deku's boyfriend." Katsuki channels his anger in brutally chopping the carrot.

Kirishima casually leans on the counter. "Well, if you need any advice on dating, I know someone with extensive experience to enlighten you with. You know, the real deal, courtesy of his amazing girlfriend." He not-so-subtly points at himself, and if Katsuki was the same man he was at high school, he would have burnt him to crisp by now. But, he's a different person, so he settles with a glare.

"Fuck off."

"It's cool, bro. It takes a lot of skill to pull off a believable relationship, so I understand if you're too scared to commit. I totally get it. Poor Midoriya is just gonna have to find an alternative."

"I'm not scared of anything," Katsuki seethes.

He's not scared of Deku. No-fucking-way. He is just very annoyed at the side effects of being around Deku. He can't get within a one-kilometer radius of him without a persistent banging in his head threatening to blow his eardrums. It's like a drumroll with no finality, or pots and pans clashing together. It drives him off the wall.

The sound wasn't always this loud and obnoxious. It started off as a gentle thudding noise he can easily ignore, a slow hum in the background of his thoughts. But like a river flowing after the winter months, it cascaded into a harsher, more brutal wave of chime, ringing in his ears, no longer dismissible by sheer force. What's worse is all the shitty nerd has to do is brush shoulders or smile at him, and it sends his mind into this blurry of white noise.

He couldn't understand why this was happening, so the best plan was discretely avoiding Deku, the obvious source of all his problems, until whatever-what-was-wrong with him went away. So, he started taking different shifts, avoiding his usual routes, making excuses to miss friends' get-togethers. To place the cherry on the cake, he thought the effects would wear off if he stayed away from Deku, but the moment he sees his name on his phone, or plastered all over the news, the drumming would start again. So, that plan meticulously failed.

If there is one thing Katsuki values in his life, it is his sense of control. And this 'thing' had been nothing but a nuisance. Last time he was involved in a big villain attack, he missed his AP shot because fucking Deku decided it was a dandy idea to give him a high five in the fucking midst of battle. He couldn't concentrate on his aim after because of that nerdy miasma broccoli-head is emitting like a poisonous gas.

And, then the nerd went ahead and started dating Round Face, and all the annoying ringing turned into something else Katsuki can't be bothered to examine in himself for too long. Distractions. That's what all this was, and Katsuki will be damned if he let something as lowly as this get in his way of becoming the number one hero.

So, no, he's not scared of Deku. He's not scared of anything. He'll show them. He'll be the best goddamn fake boyfriend Deku has ever dreamed of.

"Fine, I'll fucking do it." He slams the top on the pan with more force than necessary. "But you and Raccoon Eyes are coming with me."

It's late evening when they make it to the hotel.

Izuku was meant to finish his shift at five, but that is rarely the case with how unpredictable hero work is, so two hours later he trudges his small suitcase into the car for a two-hour ride. Kacchan and Ashido are less fortunate than him, so Izuku and Kirishima have to wait around for another hour so the duo can finish up their statements, get cleaned and clock out. Kirishima was the designated driver, with Izuku as his guide, which seemed like a reasonable combination at first, but apparently, Izuku's instructions are 'too complicated' and 'where is north, dude? My car can't go up' so they end up losing the road at least three times. He begrudgingly lets Kacchan handle the GPS after the fourth time. It goes without saying, by the time they make it to the hotel, it's almost midnight and they're exhausted.

"Deku!" A voice echoes through the lobby, getting Izuku's attention. Melissa approaches the group of pro-heroes as they make their way to the main reception. "I'm glad you and your friends were able to make it. I hope you had a good journey."

"Oh, Melissa, you really didn't have to wait for us. It's pretty late." Izuku moves to greet her as his friends stretch and make themselves comfortable on the lounge chairs.

"Nonsense. You're my guests and I won't go to sleep before I make sure your settled in."

There is a tall man standing right next to Melissa and is staring Izuku down as he shakes her hand. His expression is neutral, but he gives off a very scrutinizing aura. "Is this your friend?" He asks, feeling awkwardly observed by the gentlemen in a suit.

"Actually, this is Alfred. He's is going to be your personal butler throughout your stay." She turns to the man known as Alfred. "This is Izuku Midoriya. I trust you will make him and his friends feel welcome."

Alfred bows down for Izuku and his companions. "Of course, Ms. Shield. That will be my upmost pleasure."

"That's not really necessary." Izuku waves his hands around, hoping to get his point across. He told Kacchan Melissa will be busy most of the time, so they won't have to pretend to be a couple for long, but this development complicates things. The butler is likely informed about Izuku's relations to the guest, which means they must maintain the act the whole time they're around him. This is bad.

"I insist." Melissa turns to the rest of the group. When Izuku twists around, he is confronted with Kacchan glaring daggers at him having heard the whole conversation. This is very bad.

"I've met most of you before, except…"

Ashido takes her que and flashes a peace sign. "I'm Mina Ashido. Hero Name, Pinky. It's nice to meet you! From what I've heard, we're gonna get along wonderfully." She sends a wink in Melissa's direction.

"She's my girlfriend," Kirishima adds, his grin ridiculously proud. Their joy is so infectious, Izuku finds himself smiling too. Kacchan sticks out his tongue and looks away.

"Well, it's well-past midnight so I won't keep you for long. Alfred, please show them to their room." Melissa frowns suddenly. "Yes, one last thing. The hotel is fully booked due to conference so they, unfortunately, couldn't get you guys two separate rooms. I understand how inconvenient this is so I'm really sorry. I do have four spa vouchers as an apology from the management though. I hope that's okay!"

Izuku jumps to respond. "It's absolutely fine! You've done enough, Melissa. Now, please, go get some rest."

"Yeah, it's chill." Kirishima agrees.

"Oooh, a spa day is exactly what I need right now!" Ashido exclaims.

"Alright, then." Melissa concedes. "Have a good night, everyone. Deku, I can't wait to hear your speech on Sunday."

His what?

"Huh?" Izuku feels his heart drop to his stomach. Where is this coming from? Hasn't he suffered enough already?

"Remember our conversation on the phone the other day? I asked you about it, then. It's relatively informal, but you don't have to do it, if you really don't want to."

Oh, yes, Izuku pretty much checked out the moment the word 'boyfriend' was mentioned in their previous exchange. He honestly can't remember anything after, and he's starting to feel slightly bad for it.

"No, it's fine. I'll do it." Deku says.

"Haah, I'm not sharing a bed with fucking Deku." Katsuki turns around from the bed arrangement to face Kirishima. "Shitty Hair, you're with me."

It seems that the room only has two double beds pressed against the wall, implying that the four occupants are going to have to share. What a bullshit setup. Katsuki deserves his own bed, in his own room, away from these losers.

Kirishima takes a breath and clasps both of Katsuki's shoulder to look him directly in the eyes. "Bro, I love you. I really do. You're my best bud and you mean the world to me. I'd take a bullet for you, throw myself at a train for you, drink a month-old expired carton of milk for you. Well, maybe not that, you're on your own with the dairy. My point is, our manly bond is very important to me, and in any other circumstance, you will be my first choice." He gives a dramatic pause, and Katsuki feels his eyebrow twitching. "But I'd rather sleep next to my girlfriend." He punctuates his speech with a toothy grin. "Sorry, dude. Good luck, though." He sympathetically pats him on the shoulder. Funnily enough, he does not look sorry one bit.

Pink Hair goes to link arms with him. "Looks like I win this time, McExplody." She giggles as she drags Kirishima away and Katsuki is fuming. How dare Shitty Hair throw him away like this. Is this how betrayal feels like? Fucking fantastic.

"If you want, I'll sleep on the armchair so you can have the bed. That way you don't have to share with me." Deku pipes up from behind him as he stations his luggage to the side. He's avoiding eye contact, which only aggravates Katsuki more.

"Hell, no. Quit the sacrificial game, Deku. You're not fucking up your spine on my expense." He strides to where Deku is standing and grabs his shirt to drive the point home. "You're sleeping with me."

Deku stammers and tries to look at every direction, but Katsuki's. What is wrong with him? Katsuki can't be that unpleasant to be around. He may be sweaty, but he just showered after his shift, dammit.

"Okay," Deku finally chokes out. Katsuki lets him go and heads to the bathroom.

"Just stay on your side, and I'll keep to mine."

Izuku prides himself on his planning skills; it is, after all, one of his greatest strengths. This, however. This is not it. He didn't account for this. Why didn't he account for this? Sure, it makes sense for Melissa to book a double bed considering- oh, no. Oh, god.

When Kacchan stretches his leg, it brushes against the back of Izuku's thighs, and he thinks he might just die right there and then. His heart starts playing a high-pitched melody. Izuku wonders if Kacchan can feel the vibrations through the mattress.

Contrary to Izuku's imagination, real-Kacchan is nothing like dream-Kacchan. For starters, Kacchan moves. A lot. And he kicks. Hard. Izuku spends the first hour just dodging hands and feet coming at him from every direction. It's worse than training, because while Izuku knows enough about Kacchan in combat to rival him, he's clueless and at a huge disadvantage to Kacchan in bed.

He's currently feeling Kacchan's knee dig ferociously at his lower back. Izuku tries shuffling further to the edge of the bed to avoid the offending object, but Kacchan's knee finds its target again. Izuku sighs.

He looks longingly at Kirishima and Ashido lovingly enveloped in each other and feels a tad bit jealous. Ashido appears to have the same issue as Kacchan, but Kirishima just adjusts around her accordingly. She has a leg thrown over him as she hugs his torso from behind, looking content. The covers are in disarray, and Kirishima snores very loudly, but it doesn't disturb Ashido from her sleep. The scene in front of him was so tender, it filled him with glee. He is just very happy for his friends.

Maybe, Izuku is going about it all wrong by facing away from Kacchan and making himself as small as possible. Thus, he turns around and watches Kacchan, who's sleeping on his back. Then, before Izuku has time to adjust to his bearings, Kacchan moves and throws an arm over him, essentially trapping him, face only inches away from his own. Izuku doesn't dare breath. Kacchan's features appear quite different without the creases he constantly spouts between his eyebrows. His lips are parted as he exhales slowly. He looks almost…peaceful. It's alluring.

Izuku doesn't get a lot of time to admire his face, because next thing he knows, Kacchan is moving again and violently shoving him off the bed with one swift kick. He hits the ground with a screech and a loud thud. His suffering, thankfully, doesn't disturb any of the occupant of the room so he drags his sorry ass to the closet, searching for any spare blankets. Izuku decides his only chance of getting any sleep is to take to the armchair.

His intimate dreams of sleeping with Kacchan can rest in peace.

Katsuki wakes up to the persistent sound of the doorbell grinding on his nerves.

He groans. Whoever the brave bastard is, they're about to lose some fingers. Nobody disturbs Katsuki on his day off. Groggily, he tries to pry his eyelids open only to stare at an unfamiliar ceiling. Rays of sunshine filter through the curtain and spread on the walls.

"Sir, breakfast!" A voice echoes, distant and faint. In the background, he hears an out-of-tune melody of snores. Suddenly, it dawns on him.

Fuck.

It's Alfred, the stupid butler outside.

Now, fully awake, he whips his head to both sides as he feels around the bed. Nothing. He props himself on his elbows to peak at the floor. Empty. Where the fuck is Deku?

"Sir, can I come in?"

"Hold on one fucking minute," he yells back, hoping it'll wake the others up, but no. Kirishima and Ashido are soundly asleep on the other side of the room, completely undisturbed by his shouting. Shit, Deku chose a dandy time to disappear like this.

He sits up, finally noticing Deku slumped on the love seat in the corner, mouth hung open as he snores. What the fuck is this idiot doing? He can't let Alfred see him like this. He'll probably think Katsuki is some shitty boyfriend who kicks Deku out of bed or something. Ugh, the sacrifices he must do for the nerd.

"Psst, Deku," he shout-whispers to his comatosed hero partner to no avail. "Shit, now's not the time." Taking the pillow laying innocently on the bed, he aims it at Deku's head with the great precision that comes with years of combat. It hits him square in the face, successfully shaking him out of his slumber. "Deku," Katsuki hisses, patience running thin.

Deku blinks, distraught. "Huh? What? Five more minutes, please."

"Hey, fuckface," he tosses another pillow at him. "Come to bed before I kill you." The bell rings again. "Move your ass." Katsuki sure hopes the nerd feels the murderous intent he's emanating across the room. This is ridiculous. Who even arranged for this breakfast-in-bed bullshit in the first place? They are in this whole fiasco because of Deku's stupid mouth, and now he's going to blow it over some shuteye. Fuck this. Bakugou Katsuki is not about to look bad because the shitty nerd decided to play the martyr.

"Can someone like, get the door, please?" Kirishima stirs, slowly blinking his eyes open.

"Breakfast is here, sir. Can I come in?"

"Yeah, sure!"

Katsuki freezes.

Fuck.

Izuku seems to finally come to his senses at that moment, although still in his sleep-muddled glory. "Kacchan!" that's all the warning he gets before Deku throws himself at him, literally. He body slams Katsuki onto the mattress, instantly knocking the air right out of his lungs. He feels like a flattened pancake being crushed by a brick wall.

They hear the door being opened.

"Dumbass." He tries to wiggle from under Deku, voice hoarse. "Quick, look at what stupid hair is doing."

Deku sneaks a peak at the couple resting peacefully on the other bed. Kirishima has his arm around Ashido as she lays on his chest, head comfortable at the crook of his neck. "Oh."

Wrapping both his arms and legs around Katsuki, Deku flips onto his back, sequentially holding him in a blanket burrito. Laying on top of Deku, with his face pressed to his broad chest, Katsuki grits out, "that's not what I meant." How did the idiot manage to untangle the hotel sheets from under the mattress?

"Mr. Midoriya, I hope I'm not interrupting anything. Would you and Mr. Bakugou like some breakfast, or shall I come another time?"

Moustache, Pink hair and Peas-for-brain are all watching them with a pointed interest and Katsuki feels his face burn at being seen like this, tangled in the sheets with fucking Deku. The drumming noise comes back, load and clear in his head. He shoots up (or tries to, considering the iron hold Deku has on him. Fuck him and his ridiculously beefy arms), fighting the sheets as he struggles to wiggle himself out of this mess.

"No, it's okay. Breakfast sounds nice right now". Deku seems unfazed by the ruckus as he lets Katsuki slid off and sit on the edge of the bed. The thudding beat is ever so persistent in his head; it's the embarrassment. It must be. Deku is just so fucking embarrassing.

Kirishima and Ashido are already sat up, pressed side by side, with a large tray, decorated with a plethora of small dishes, propped up on the bed.

"Leave the food on the counter and go," Katsuki says to the butler, before Deku gets any ideas.

Katsuki is starting to think this will be harder than he anticipated.