One day all was well in the Mushroom Kingdom, the sky was clear and birds chirping was all that can be heard. Mario and Luigi were on a sort-of vacation from Brooklyn relaxing under a tree. "Man it don't get no better than this eh, Luigi?" Says Mario.

"Well except for watching the New York Yankees game absolutely wasted." Said Luigi.

Suddenly all peace was disrupted with a loud, unrelenting "Waaaaahhhhh!"

"Oh shit, not again." Says Luigi looking at a tall slim figure standing before him. "Wario's brother!"

"No it is I Waluigi I'm not even related to Wario for your information!" Waluigi angrily proclaimed.

"Then what the hell are you if you're not Wario's bro?" Mario asked.

"I'm nobody!" Waluigi replied.

"You got that right!" Said Luigi.

Waluigi got pissed, "I was just gonna rob you for your lunch coins but now I'm so pissed off I'm gonna kill you! Wha ha ha ha!" Waluigi plucks out a bob-omb and throws it at the Mario bros. Mario picks the Bob-omb up and throws it back. "You know you're not too bright!"

"Oh fuck me! Waaaaahhhhh!" Waluigi tries to make a break for it, but the blast send him blasting off into the sky Team Rocket style.

"Won't Waluigi learn he'll never be relevant or be playable in Super Smash Bros.?" Luigi Asks.

"Only when he get as smart as mushrooms."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Later in that night Waluigi was hanging outside a bar for Mario enemies, unable to be served there because he couldn't rob Mario's coins. As if things weren't bad enough, laughter was heard inside Waluigi peers into the bar, opening the door slightly only to find some Shy Guys on stilts making fun of his extremely lanky legs. Waluigi grabbed a passerby Bob-omb, lights the fuse and lobs it into the bar. He shuts the door and blocks the exit, loud knocking and screams were heard then a massive bang. Waluigi opened the door once the silence kicked in and overlooked the damage he caused. The bar was reduced to rubble and the charred dismembered body parts of everyone who was inside. Waluigi then got an idea of how to make the world finally take him seriously.

The next day at a gas station outside Toad's Turnpike Waluigi pulls in to fill up his Waluigi Racer. After he fills her up, he sneakily takes the hose behind his wheels for obscured use. He then goes into the station to pay.

"I'd like to pay for my gas please." Waluigi said while trying to hold back an acid reflex because the though of paying any amount of coinage disgusts him.

"That'll be 10'000 coins please, say that's not a big car do you really need all that gas?!" Said the cashier with suspicion.

"That's because my car is like the Tardis and it actually needs a lot more than it looks..."

"Oookay, I guess that makes total sense..."

Waluigi pretends "Oopsey daisy I forgot my coins in my ride I'll be right back."

Waluigi dashes to the car and hops behind the wheel. He equipped a fire flower then he drives off, throwing a fireball behind which ignites the gas and blasts the whole the station into a smoking crater. Waluigi snickers with a sinister smirk as he drives back into town.

A few minutes later Waluigi reaches his apartment carrying several Chuckola Cola bottles filled with gas from the former station but then he realizes he made a mistake. "Oh fuck me! I forgot to buy Kleenex for my Bob-Molotovs!" Waluigi remembers that the only tissues he had were under the bed, crumpled up and filled up with wank stains. "Nasty but they'll have to do!" Waluigi digresses as he unfolds a badly spunked up tissue sheet. He inserts the tissues in the neck of each bottle thus creating his devastating weaponry.

At Wario's pad in Diamond City, Wario was just done bathing his lardy ass in a tub filled with gold so then he goes to weigh himself. "240 lbs? Yeah! I just lost weight and I didn't even diet or exercise! Wa ha ha!" Though Wario didn't realize he the scales were set to measure Kilograms not Pounds.

Outside, The Waluigi Racer parks outside of Wario's pad. Waluigi lights up the tissuse sheet of the Bob-Molotov.

"Hey-a Wario, ya like-a some Chuckola Cola? Come-a get it you-a fat fucking pig!" Waluigi puts the Bob-Molotov on a sling shot and shoots it through Wario's window.

"Oh boy! Free Chuckola Cola!" Wario came waddling to the bottle slobbering his fat disgusting lips.

As soon as he realizes that the bottle was really a fire bomb Wario let out a "Waaaaah!" and tried to run away but after two steps Wario stopped and hunched over, wheezing for air while clutching his chest.

"Why... Huff! Am I... Hahh! Suuuuuch... Puff! A fat... Herff! Bast..." Before Wario could finish his last sentence his house exploded into flames. Wario became a human fireball, then he melted into a large gross pile of fat.

"That's for making everyone think I'm your brother!" Waluigi shouted driving the hell of the vicinity.

When Waluigi in safe distance he then stops and pulls out a leaf of lined paper. "Now who next?" He ponders whilst crossing a name off the paper.

Waluigi arrives at his next destination at Nintendo Headquarters in Kyoto, Japan. "This is for not giving me an important role in any main series game!" Waluigi yelled lighting up another Bob-Molotov and then shooting it up high into near the top of the building.

On impact the building took minimal damage from the fiery explosion as it turns out the building was made out of thick layers of Nintendium. Police sirens were heard in the distance and Waluigi knew it was time to get the hell out of there. He saddles up in the Waluigi racer and heads for the exit only to be blocked off by the cop cars. Waluigi crashes head first at top speed and in the shock of the impact he accidentally shoots a fireball into the sack of his Bob-Molotovs which triggers a miniature nuclear explosion leaving very unrecognisable remains of the "hero" of the story. Shigeru Miyamoto then exits the building and urinates on the carcass.

The End