Okay so my sister is basically in love with John Phoenix both on the internet and in real life, like, I mean she's OBSESSED with him. It really can't be healthy to be so sexually attracted to a Phoenix Wright sprite recolor. But love is love so I wrote this story to commemorate their 2 week anniversery, enjoy babes ;)

One day John Phoenix was waiting at a crosswalk. His legs were wobbly. He was taking deep breaths. His heart was pumping like Arnold Sharwtsniger. Why? Because he was in love, why else?

The girl of his desires was standing across the street. She was about 5'2 and had hair, clothes, and shoes. If you looked up "girl that John Phoenix was in love with" in a dictionary you might see a picture of her. I mean if your dictionary has pictures in it, mine does.

"W-what is this illogical feeling?" John Phoenix said. He had never felt like this before. And god, over a girl he jus saw for the first time from across the street? He was angry at himself. Mooning over some random girl! It went against all his higher beliefs in logic and junk like that!

He tried closing his eyes to get her out of his head, but that just seemed to trap her in there... All he could see in his mind's eye was her. The way she flipped her hare... the way she was chewing like 5 pieces of gum at once and then spat the wad onto some guy's shoes... the way her eyebrows were really patchy because she had some kind of weird genetic thing going on...

His eyes shot open. He licked his lips. Damn, he had to get himself some of that! So he started running across the street and she also started running across the street BECAUSE THE SPIRIT OF THEIR LOVE WAS DUAL but tragedy struck and that tragedy was a CLOWN CAR!

Yes an evil clown car was running people over. It kept chasing trucyfan6969 around and trying to kill her. This made John Phoenix angry. He didn't like it when cars did that. So he stopped the car with his the tip of his pinky finger then shattered the windshield and pulled the vehicular assassin out by the neck.

It was... Manfred von Karma dressed as a birthday clown?!

"But why daddy?" sobbed Franziska as trucyfan comforted her. "Just why?"

"Because me no liek dat ship it bad me kil ppl" say Manfred von Karma. God the darkness that could cloud a man's soul... it gave me chills just writing that dialog.

"Manfred I should have known you would escape prison and be cringe." John Phoenix said. "You die now." And he jumped into the air and volleyball spiked Manfred's sissy old man corpse down an open manhole and he got eaten by alligators.

"Thanks for saving me, boo," said trucyfan. "Let's kiss."

And kiss they did. THE END

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