Professeur Cheverie,
I regret to inform you that I will not be able to attend your lectures this week. I know this will come as a shock to you as I have never once missed one of your classes. (Of that I am completely certain. Have I missed any? Never mind.)
In any case, I wish to assure you that my reasons for excusing myself are quite valid. Yes. They are, that is, they consist of, well, they certainly do not consist of hijacking the recently deceased Monsieur Lamarque's funeral procession and building a barricade with a riot of other wayward students in protest against the king. Not at all.
You have come to know me very well over the past few years. You know my philosophies and my desire for peaceful change, certainly nothing violent. Barricading and singing clearly anti-monarchy songs is simply not in my nature. Ask Barthélémy Joly. He's not violent in the least. He's a hypochondriac, for goodness sake. Hypochondriacs are the least violent people on the face of the planet, except maybe poets.
Speaking of which, Joly will be unable to attend your lectures this week as well. He will probably send you a letter of his own, but I thought it would not hurt to inform you in advance. Strange how that happened, is it not? Both of your most faithful students will be absent. I hope this does not disrupt the normal flow of your classes.
In any event, I also wish to inform you that there is a slight (actually quite large) chance that neither of us will return to taking your lectures. Ever. You have been the most excellent professor I have had the pleasure of learning from. Will you join in our crusade? Never mind, forget that last part.
Sincerely,
Jean-Marie Combeferre