Genius Billionaire Playboy Philanthropist
"Please, just confirm this for me," Xavier said in a tired and unbelieving voice. "You have been given metaphysical knowledge about important world events, by, in your own words, some form of higher power." I just nodded. He rubbed his temples, "If not for the fact that I have looked into your mind, I would be inclined to call this complete rubbish."
"Sir, the only reason I came to you is because I needed to find someone I could trust with the information in my head. I can help a lot of people by just telling them what could happen." I interjected. Xavier at least looked intrigued.
"Tell me, , who do you wish to help? Yourself?" Well duh, I mean seriously, who else?
"No Sir, but with the knowledge I have I could save the world ten times over." A blatant lie. Baldy sighed,
"Very well, then I believe I should have you meet
my godson." Wait, who the hell is he talking about? I don't wanna meet some obscure-ass mutant. I didn't even know he had any family except Mystique
"Your godson? Professor?"
"Yes! My godson, his name is Tony Stark. You probably know him as Iron Man." Wot…
For the two hours we had to wait for Stark to get here I made conversation with Xavier.
"Professor, you're the most powerful psychic alive. Is it possible you could help me with these new powers that I've been given?" He was confused,
"Help? In what sense?" He asked.
"Well, you did say you couldn't access that knowledge. Is there any way for you to manipulate it? Maybe fix my mental structure before the information damages me." This was really important. I don't know how most SI's forgot about this shit. You basically have twice as much information in your head, most people are gonna forget that real quick. I needed to do this fast, even the most minor details were important, especially considering the time period. If I play my cards right I could stop the waste of time that was Iron Man 2 and also have Tony Stark in my debt.
"Very well then, prepare yourself." Xavier said as he put two fingers on his temple.
Suddenly I'm standing on a cloud of pearly white. It was beautiful, absolutely jaw dropping, and ever-expansive, or in Layman's terms; The Hyperbolic Time Chamber from DBZ on crack. The Astral Plane made every LSD high in the world seem cheap in comparison. There were wisps floating around and every time I touched one of them I remembered something from my new life. The odd thing was, there were no memories of my old life…
"Is this my mind?" I asked aloud,
"It sure is." I jumped at the voice behind me, there he was, Charles Xavier standing on his legs.
"W-what about my-uh-special knowledge." I asked. He smiled benignly,
"That is the conundrum, I need you to concentrate on those memories now." Xavier commanded. I did just that, the strange thing was, the closer I got to remembering the further they went away. It was as if someone was trying to keep them from me. I tried to play a bit of tug-of-war with it and fetch the memories, suddenly I felt a massive force help me in my imaginary tug-of-war (Probably, Xavier). Almost instantly, a black ball was in front of us. It was warping everything around it, almost causing the rest of the plane to shatter. It behaved just like how 4-D objects are theorized to behave, it's volume turning into a singularity and then expanding in oscillations.
Wait, how did I remember that? That was something I skimmed off a paper I was reading in Berkeley two years back. Then I noticed the Professor, the guy was sweating like he was in the Infernos of Hell! Jesus, whatever he was doing, well…
It certainly was doing something, I could sense it. My mind suddenly felt heavier, as if someone just turned the wisps of information into solid crystal. The whole landscape of the Astral Plane changed from a cloudy void into a massive crystal building. Then, it started shaking.
"Uh- Professor, What's going on?" I asked
"I'm afraid I don't know…" He said mystified. All of a sudden we heard a bird's cry and everything went up in flames. Oh, fuck.
"DO NOT CHANGE WHAT YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND TRESPASSER!" A voice boomed, once again the scenery was different. Instead of a crystal structure or an infinite void we seemed to be standing in the middle of a massive black painting…
Of a God-Damn phoenix! I suppose this was the Phoenix Force's way of saying don't fuck with me? I was unsure, but then I noticed everything else; My mind-scape (If you would call it that) was now something straight out Star Wars or Tron. Neon lines of white flowed around, the entire floor area was gray and the lines seemed to form patterns for miles. I would have enjoyed the view more, but I was suddenly slammed out of my mind.
I saw that we were back in Xavier's office, the professor himself looked pale.
"Wa-Was th-that the being that gave your power?" He asked shakily, well, best I tell him yes.
"I think so. What did it do?" I asked, Xavier looked thoughtful.
"I believe IT, enhanced your mind." Oh cool, that's nea-HOLD UP WHAT! What the hell did 'enhanced' mean. I didn't want some super bitchy hot mess of a celestial being to make me it's host! Then it started happening.
Suddenly, my mind was working at a million times the speed of light. A few moments back I only knew the concept behind the arc reactor; basically a combination of cold fusion and particle acceleration to generate a plasma current. Now? I could probably generate the core Tony needed with the necessary supplies. I was essentially smarter…
Now, I don't mean to toot my own horn or anything but, before this enhancement and this new life I already had an IQ of 139. With this new enhancement the Flaming Chicken made? I was probably Terrence Tao's level of genius. I was one inch closer to what I wanted, OMNIPOTENCE.
"So, who's the kid?" We jumped. Tony Stark, the inglorious bastard himself. Truth be told, he looked only somewhat like Downey Jr. He was at least 2 inches taller than Downey and had a younger face, which I guess was to be expected. "Charlie?" He asked.
"Oh! Yes, um- This is Alexander Pyke. He came to meet me due to a special condition he has." Xavier explained, Stark raised an eyebrow.
"So he's a mutant?" Stark asked.
"Oh no, his power is something much different. What intrigues me more is how you got here so quickly? My, it's only been half an hour."
"Took the suit." Stark smirked out, any man with a brain could guess what suit he took.
"Amazing piece of technology, truly. From Washington to Upstate New York that fast. Your father would be proud," Xavier said with a smile. Stark grimaced, really that guy had some serious daddy issues.
"He might have been, probably would've given me a long lecture about how I should have marketed it or something." Stark said off-handedly, Xavier sighed.
"Tony, you may not like to believe it but, Howard truly was convinced of your potential. He said that you would be the one who would take his vision to new heights." Stark scoffed. The Professor just shook his head. "But, that isn't the reason I've called you today. Alexander, please do tell him what you know?" Oh yeah. Real smart idea, put me in the limelight. What the hell do I say? Screw it; best to quote the film science.
"So, Mr. Stark? How much steady Palladium isotope poisoning have you gotten from the neutron damage in the glow-ball on your chest?" I asked smugly. Stark looked alarmed and a bit concerned.
"How the hell do you know that?" He roared out.
"I believe that's something we should elaborate on, Alexander here, has a power which allows him to see important past and future events. His control over this ability seems nearly impossible. Moreover, it is not a mutation." Xavier explained as Stark looked at me with wide eyes.
"Do you… Do you know how to help me?" He hesitantly asked.
"That thing in your chest. It's based on unfinished tech." I said. Stark scoffed.
"No it was finished; it's never been particularly effective until I minituarised it and put in my chest,"
"No, from what I can tell, your father believed it to be a stepping stone for something greater. He planned to kick off an energy race that was going to make the nuclear reactor look like a triple A battery. He thought you were the only one with the potential to finish his work." I said, Xavier looked at me surprised which he really shouldn't be considering what I told him. Stark shook his head,
"I don't know where you're getting your information, but, he wasn't my biggest fan. This was the same guy who's favorite day was when he shipped me off to boarding school. So pardon me if I take what you're saying with a grain of salt."
"No, that's where you're wrong. Professor!" Xavier looked at me, "Show him what I'm projecting right now." Xavier nodded. I was trying to show Stark those Stark Expo bloopers where Howard said his greatest creation was him. Calling back to that actually, that meant that Tony was probably his biological son then, unlike the comic books where the plot device known as Arno Stark existed. Y'know come to think of it… The Phoenix Force did more than just raise my intelligence; I'm able to completely recall everything that happened in my old life perfectly now, I'm pretty sure I was also thinking faster considering that Stark was still in whatever trance the Professor had put him in. Not too bad actually, the Phoenix Force liked me enough to enhance me which meant that was one Celestial Being who wasn't out to kill me and I also had Stark and Xavier near me. I had to become famous enough now that nobody like S.H.I.E.L.D or HYDRA could 'disappear' me.
"Gah!" Stark's cry broke me out of my thoughts, he looked straight at me. "Ok then Nostradamus, how do I fix myself?" he asked.
"Your father theorized an element with an atomic weight of 204 whose formula is contained in the old Stark Expo diorama. If Feyman's postulates serve right, after element 132 the rest will all be stable." I said as Stark quirked an eyebrow,
"M.I.T?" He asked, I scoffed.
"M.I.T is for pussies. Berkeley." Stark's eyes got a glint in them. Xavier laughed.
"Yeah? Well one of those pussies made the greatest suit of armor in the world kid."
"The same guy who thought keeping an Arc Reactor in his chest was a bright idea? Give me a break."
"Berkeley is full of idiots who can't operate a damn telegraph, you should respect your seniors kid."
"When I meet them I will."
"While this is great and all. I would like to get back to the matter at hand. Alexander, you wish to do good in the World and you fear what might happen if unpleasant parties obtain your power. I have a suggestion," Xavier interjected.
"Let's hear it Charlie." Stark said
"Tony, why don't you adopt Alex?" WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? Is this guy serious? Actually…
It isn't a bad idea. Being close to Stark means being close to Stark Tower during the Invasion. It would mean a shitton of money as well.
"Charlie, you can't possibly be serious. I sure as hell don't want some dickless wannabe-Baba Vanga brat who studied from Berkeley as my adoptive son." Tony said pleadingly. Seriously tho, Berkeley was the best. As soon as I got the legal permission I was gonna send M.I.T to Al Qaeda. Those cunts had the balls to reject me.
"I assure you Tony, you and Alex would get along well. I believe Alex has no problem with it either." Xavier rebutted.
"Actually… No, it is a good idea, I have the knowledge to stop global threats and you have the muscle. We're both smart enough to not bore the shit out of each other. I'm also mature enough so I won't be a hassle and we could be a good duo. Plus I just saved your life." I added. Stark narrowed his eyes,
"That remains to be seen, your miracle cure is a bit far fetched in reality." That is probably true in his case. The guy had been trying elements for months and some guy rolled around with a cure? I would take it with a grain of salt as well. Come to think of it the whole situation was way too fast to be normal. I get Xavier trusting me and all, that was his own confidence in his telepathy and my first rate acting, Tony trusting me made no sense. Why would this guy trust some random kid when the man who was a mentor to him betrayed him a few months back? I pondered about that for a few moments about that while Xavier and Tony argued.
"Fine, I'll adopt you." He acquiesced.
"All right, I'm not gonna call you Dad though." I said. He smirked,
"Just call me Tony and we'll be fine Nostradamus Jr."
"All right Mr. 'Genius Billionaire Playboy Philanthropist', let's get to work on that element then…" I have to say, my luck is on fire right now. I got Stark Industries, I got a brain boost, I got Xavier as a friend, and Tony Stark as an adoptive father all in one go. I still think Tony was a bit wary of me, then again, him accepting so easily showed his reckless headfirst demeanor. What the hell, the guy was awesome excluding the fact that he studied in the pussiest institute ever. I was on Cloud 9, Tony Stark meant Alexander STARK! That meant my own Iron Man suit, the Extremis Virus, and most probably a super AI. Now all I had to wait for was the Invasion then I would have 2 Infinity Stones in my hand. Y'know what I should probably go to 177A Bleecker Street as well…
Jesus, so much work, such little time…