Aubrey grabbed her phone off the nightstand and turned off the alarm before it could sound. She rolled to her back and stared up at the ceiling, wishing she could turn off her mind for just a second. She blew out a breath of air as she ran her fingers through her hair.
It had taken her forever to fall asleep and she was only asleep for what felt like seconds before she startled out of a dream and hadn't had any luck sleeping again since. She had remembered the dream so vividly in the first moments of being awake before it started disappearing as dreams tend to do, leaving her with tiny fragments that continued to blur as time went on.
She was with Stacie (because of course Stacie would appear in her dream). Stacie was just as she had been when Aubrey saw her earlier in the day, walking across the quad, only now Aubrey was at her side walking with her. She can't remember what they were talking about but she does remember how she felt comfortable, relaxed in a way that Aubrey has never actually felt in real life.
Aubrey squeezed her eyes shut and latched onto a dream fragment, her mind conjuring up Stacie, the brunette walking close to her and looking at her with a smile and a sparkle in her eye. Stacie laughed and Aubrey wished she could hear the sound. Stacie let her hand drop from where it was hooked on the strap of her backpack so that it was hanging at her side as she moved slightly closer to Aubrey, causing the backs of their hands to graze each other.
Aubrey's eyes snapped open and she forced her body to get up and go through the motions of preparing for a run. She needed to do something to get out of her head. She wondered what the hell her problem was and how on earth a stupid photo managed to cause such a disruption. Even if it was a really cute photo - a photo that seemed, to Aubrey, to be placed carefully enough so that it was exactly eye level as Stacie sat studying and the blonde found herself imagining that Stacie's eyes drifted to it often when she started getting stressed with her homework or was stuck on a problem or just needed a second to refocus. Aubrey shook the faint smile off her face in an exasperated motion as she put in her earbuds and turned the volume up high enough that she could focus on nothing but the music.
Chloe watched Aubrey discreetly out of the corner of her eye as they walked to rehearsal, careful to make sure she wouldn't notice that she was being observed. Chloe could feel the anxious energy coming in waves off the blonde. She's used to Aubrey being uptight and stressed but this was something different. Aubrey had been distracted since she saw that photo and Chloe was just trying to figure out what was going through her mind and what she could do to help her along. Chloe was sure that Aubrey was a lost cause without her.
First things first, Chloe wanted to get Aubrey out of her own head. Nothing good comes from her staying alone up there for too long.
Chloe grabbed Aubrey's hand and started swinging their arms playfully in between them, not letting Aubrey pull her hand away when she tried. Aubrey hated holding hands with anyone and Chloe knew that more than anyone else because Chloe loved holding hands and tried often but even when Aubrey was drunk and more affectionate, she still didn't tolerate hand holding.
"What are you doing?" Aubrey questioned as she looked at their linked hands. She tried to tug her hand away again but the ginger tightened her grip.
"Trying to get you to pay attention to me," Chloe said with a pout. "Whatcha thinking about?"
Aubrey reached up with her free hand to smooth the already smooth hair in her ponytail - something she did compulsively when she was nervous. She tugged her hand hard, finally succeeding in breaking it from Chloe's grip. She slid her arm across her body to hug her waist so her hand was as far away from Chloe's reach as she could manage.
"I'm just thinking about all the work we have to do to get these Bellas ready for a real performance," Aubrey said lightly.
"We'll get there." Chloe skipped up to the door of their rehearsal space. "We've already come so far!" Chloe turned to grin at Aubrey as she grabbed the handle of the door but one look told her she had already lost the blonde, who was staring straight ahead at the now open entrance. Chloe watched her take a deep breath before crossing the threshold.
Aubrey marched to the front of the room without looking around to see who was already present. She swung off her backpack and opened it to grab the binder inside. The binder was a Bellas bible of sorts. It was packed full of music, choreography, rehearsal tips and various activities to urge group cohesiveness. Aubrey kept her back to the room and flipped through the binder as if she was looking for something but she wasn't even paying attention.
Stacie had already been in the room when Aubrey and Chloe walked in. She had been talking to Fat Amy but her eyes tracked the blonde as she made her way to the front of the room. Something seemed off about the Bella leader. And the way Chloe stood there staring after her confirmed Stacie's suspicion that something was up.
Aubrey finally turned and surveyed the room. Stacie had watched Aubrey do this almost daily for a month. Her eyes always started with Stacie and eventually came back around and ended with Stacie, without fail. It always made her heart swell. Stacie's brow furrowed as Aubrey's eyes skipped over her and didn't return.
The blonde eventually got into her regular groove as the Bella leader and she was able to almost block out any outside thoughts. Her eyes kept drifting toward Stacie but Aubrey was able to avoid any direct looks. After an extensive warm-up she got the girls working on choreography. She was taking a sip of water and looking at the binder for real this time when Chloe approached her.
"You need to deal with Stacie."
Aubrey coughed on the water she was swallowing. "What?"
"Look!" Chloe pointed towards the brunette and Aubrey took a real look at Stacie for the first time that rehearsal period. She was hitting all the proper markers with her bottom half but her arms were all off as her hands touched all over her body.
Aubrey set down her water bottle with a huff and stomped over to Stacie, immediately in fix-it mode.
"Stacie!"
The brunette stopped her moves and looked at Aubrey, grinning innocently.
Aubrey crossed her arms with a frown. "Do it again."
Aubrey ignored Stacie's smirk as she started moving through the choreography sequence. The brunette's hands moved suggestively over her body for several seconds before Aubrey reached out and grabbed her. She ignored the spark she felt as she touched Stacie's skin. "No."
Stacie looked down at Aubrey's hands on her arms and looked up again, her eyes sparkling mischievously. Aubrey quickly let go of Stacie's arms and crossed her own over her front, commanding Stacie to start over. Stacie did and the second her arms started going off course again, Aubrey reached out and corrected them. She did this several times before she noticed Stacie was biting her lip to suppress a laugh.
"You're doing this on purpose!" Aubrey said incredulously as she stepped back.
Stacie let out a low chuckle that made Aubrey's stomach flip. The brunette looked directly at Aubrey, started the sequence again and completed it flawlessly, better than Aubrey had seen from any of the others. Stacie finished with a flirty shrug as she winked at Aubrey.
Aubrey's mouth opened in flustered shock as she tried to figure out how to respond but before she got a chance, Chloe was calling everyone's attention to the front of the room. Stacie grinned at Aubrey again, brushing her shoulder against Aubrey's as she went to take her normal place over by Beca.
Aubrey stayed rooted in place off to the side of the room, vaguely aware that Chloe was addressing the group. She blinked several times before she started moving to the front, finally keying in on what Chloe was saying.
"... and so Aubrey and I would love to have you all come over to our place tomorrow night. We'll provide the food and drinks. Just show up!" Chloe grinned and an excited murmur went through the group as everyone started gathering their things to leave.
Aubrey quickly approached Chloe. "What the hell, Chloe?" Aubrey hissed.
"What?" Chloe asked innocently.
"You can't just invite all these people over to our place without asking me!"
"I did ask you. Don't you remember?" Aubrey looked confused. "I asked on the way home from the movies and you agreed and then I asked if you were even listening to me!"
"Oh." Aubrey chewed her bottom lip. "Oh yeah. I must have forgotten."
Chloe knew Aubrey didn't forget because Chloe knew she had never actually asked but she figured Aubrey deserved it for ignoring her over the past several conversations. If Aubrey was going to stop paying attention to what she was saying, Chloe was certainly going to use it to her advantage.
Aubrey caught herself staring out the window for what seemed like the hundredth time in so many minutes. She was curled up on a cushioned bench in a cozy window seat nook in the kitchen. Her back was against one end of the bench at the wall and her knees were pulled up close to her body. It was Aubrey's favorite place in the whole house to read. She looked down at the book resting against her legs and read the same page for the fifth time, trying hard to concentrate.
Aubrey had already cleaned and prepared drinks and snacks and whatever else she could think of in anticipation of the Bellas arrival. Since they probably wouldn't show up for another hour, Aubrey thought she could distract herself by reading but it wasn't working.
Aubrey heard Chloe fiddling with the speaker system and suddenly music filled all the common rooms in the house. It was a pretty impressive set-up and the blonde had a sneaking suspicion that Beca had something to do with it. She wondered how many times Beca had been in her space without her knowing - and worried that Chloe felt she couldn't tell her.
Aubrey sighed and placed her bookmark in her book before setting it on the small table in front of the little nook. She stood up and surveyed the kitchen again with her hands on her hips, making sure she wasn't missing anything. Her eyes flitted across the various alcoholic options arranged on the counter. Aubrey wasn't a big drinker; it wasn't good for your vocal chords and it wasn't good if you wanted to stay in control. But Aubrey was tired of the anxious knot in her stomach and she wanted to loosen up, just a bit.
She grabbed a bottle of cinnamon whiskey and twisted open the top before pouring a double shot into one of the small disposable cups sitting off to the side. She brought the cup to her lips and threw the shot back before she could overthink it, swallowing it quickly with a slight grimace. Aubrey stood there for a few minutes, knowing that whiskey hits her fast but also burns out fast.
It's quite amazing how quickly Aubrey's face flushes when she's been drinking. Aubrey could tell it was already starting because she felt her cheeks burning. She reached out for the bottle again, her hand hesitating just slightly before taking hold and pouring another double shot. She set the cup down, still uncertain, and carefully screwed the top back onto the whisky. Screw it. This time when Aubrey drained the cup she didn't grimace.
"Are you starting the party without me?" The unexpected voice made Aubrey yelp and drop her empty cup before spinning around, one hand reaching out to the counter to steady her from stumbling and the other moving to cover her heart. Stacie stood there casually with her head tilted, a lopsided smile on her lips.
"You scared the livin' daylights out of me," Aubrey breathed out. She could feel her heart hammering against the hand on her chest.
For the first time ever, Stacie heard the slight lilt of a southern accent in Aubrey's words. She wanted to figure out where it came from; she wanted to hear it again.
The brunette chuckled softly. "Sorry about that."
Stacie walked towards the counter and looked at the bottles, easily grabbing the one Aubrey had chosen, and poured herself what had to be a triple shot. She turned to look at Aubrey, taking in her extra rosy cheeks and noticing her hand was still over her heart. Stacie lifted her cup slightly away from her in the motion of a toast and winked at Aubrey before easily emptying her cup as if she was drinking water.
"You're early," Aubrey observed when she finally found her voice.
Stacie looked at Aubrey intently for a second, making the blonde suddenly feel a little too exposed. As if reading her mind, Stacie looked away and casually strolled around the kitchen, taking an inventory of what was there. "Chloe asked me and Beca to come early to help set up." Stacie hooked a thumb into her pocket and Aubrey's eyes took in her tight shirt with ample cleavage and her tighter jeans. "But it looks like things are good to go here." Stacie smirked at Aubrey before she turned to take a seat at the small table by the window.
Aubrey felt rooted in place as she had watched Stacie saunter around her kitchen. She didn't know what to do or how to act. She turned to straighten the already straight bottles of alcohol. She tightened the cap on the whisky that was already half gone.
"Are you reading this?" The difference in Stacie's tone made Aubrey turn towards her. Her voice sounded light and bright, like an awed girl, instead of the low, casual-cool tone she had been using before.
Aubrey found herself moving towards the nook as she watched Stacie pick up the book. The brunette turned her head towards Aubrey with questioning eyes and Aubrey realized she hadn't answered her. Her head was spinning a bit.
Aubrey nodded and sat next to Stacie at the table. "Mhm, yeah."
"This is crazy! I'm reading this book right now too!" Stacie's tone was equal parts disbelief and giddy excitement as she grinned at Aubrey. Aubrey found herself smiling back, unable to help it.
Stacie flipped through Aubrey's worn copy of Atlas Shrugged until she got to where Aubrey had placed her bookmark. "Hey, we're even about in the same place. Wow. This is really crazy."
Aubrey was watching Stacie's hands flip through the book. Her cheeks felt so hot. Her brain took a second to catch up with what was happening and she realized she should probably say something, anything.
"How are you liking it so far?" Aubrey asked, twirling the ring on her index finger. Stacie glanced up at the blonde. Aubrey didn't seem as surprised as Stacie by this incredible coincidence. There are millions upon millions of books in the world! What were the odds? Stacie tilted her head and regarded Aubrey carefully. Her rosy cheeks reminded Stacie that she had been drinking when Stacie found her and the brunette didn't know how much she had before. Stacie shrugged off her wonderment about the lack of reaction in favor of thinking about the fact that she actually had Aubrey in front of her, talking to her.
"It's really intriguing so far. I like reading it, it has my attention, but I don't know how to feel about what I'm reading yet. Does that make sense?" Stacie scrunched her nose.
Aubrey nodded. "Do you think you need to agree with a book's philosophy to enjoy the book?"
Stacie watched Aubrey twirl the ring around her finger before looking up to meet her eyes. "That's… not something I've ever thought about before." Aubrey could see Stacie's mind working so she waited patiently. The brunette shook her head slowly. "No, I don't suppose I'd need to agree. If it got me thinking, truly thinking, well, wouldn't that be the point?"
A faint smile ghosted Aubrey's lips. Her face was flushed and her eyes were slightly glossy but she was still present with Stacie. She leaned toward the brunette and whispered, "Keep reading."
Stacie leaned in too. She lowered her voice but she wasn't quite sure why. "Have you read this before?" Stacie's eyes flicked down to Aubrey's mouth when the older girl's tongue briefly wet her lips.
Aubrey leaned closer and Stacie sucked in a breath, absurdly thinking that the Bella leader was going to kiss her, but Aubrey just stretched her arm and slid the book out of Stacie's loose grasp, pulling it towards herself. Aubrey trailed her fingers across the front of the book. "This is one of my very favorite books."
Stacie almost missed Aubrey's words because she was too focused on the beauty of the girl in front of her. Stacie didn't often have the opportunity to be able to closely scrutinize Aubrey's face and she wanted to memorize every detail. She felt Aubrey looking at her but it took her a second to finish her complete scan before she brought her gaze to Aubrey's eyes; eyes that she couldn't quite find the words to describe, the color of something she couldn't quite seem to name. Aubrey held the eye contact almost defiantly and time seemed suspended for a moment.
Aubrey broke their gaze when the doorbell rang. She blinked several times before standing and moving away from the table. The alcohol buzz had gotten her through the interaction relatively unscathed but she could feel it fading away and with it, the little courage she had.
Stacie watched Aubrey back out of the kitchen, hugging her book to her stomach, before ducking out and going down the hallway. The brunette crossed the room to the entrance of the kitchen and peered down the hallway after her. She watched Aubrey slip into a door at the end of the hall and made a mental note of what she assumed was the blonde's bedroom before she was suddenly tackled out of nowhere by Fat Amy.
"Legs! Let's get this party started." Fat Amy rubbed her hands together while she looked at her drink options. "Want me to make you somethin'?"
Stacie knew a drink from Fat Amy was dangerous. Her gaze flicked down the hall to the still closed door at the end before turning to Fat Amy with a big smile. "Hit me with the best you got."
Stacie didn't see Aubrey emerge from the room but a while later she spotted her seated at the end of the couch in the living room, talking casually with Chloe and Cynthia Rose. Stacie grinned when the ginger got up and left the space next to Aubrey open.
Aubrey's head was turned to her right, still talking to Cynthia Rose who was on the other couch, when she felt the cushion shift beneath her. She turned as a thigh pressed against her own and met Stacie's amused eyes. Stacie held out a cup to her.
Aubrey took the cup instinctually and noticed Stacie had one of her own. Aubrey ignored the tiny somersault her stomach did thinking Stacie got the extra drink just for her.
Aubrey smiled and realized a few beats too late that she was staring into Stacie's eyes. She cleared her throat and looked down at the clearish peach liquid in her cup. "What is this?"
Stacie laughed. "I have no idea. Fat Amy made it. I can only taste the alcohol; I think there are several kinds." Stacie brought the cup to her lips and took a sip. The brunette swayed slightly and her shoulder pressed against Aubrey.
"How many of these have you had?" Aubrey searched Stacie's face, quickly bringing her eyes back to her drink when Stacie bit her lip.
Stacie chuckled lowly; Aubrey's ears picked up on the sound even though it could barely be heard over the music. Aubrey was beginning to love that sound. She felt her cheeks warm.
"I've just started my second," Stacie said, bringing Aubrey back to the moment. Stacie lightly pushed against the bottom of Aubrey's cup to bring it closer to the blonde's lips. "Try it."
Aubrey quirked an eyebrow. "Peer pressure isn't cool Stacie."
Stacie dropped her hand and Aubrey watched her eyes widen while she started shaking her head. "No, you don't - I mean, you totally don't have to…"
Stacie stopped floundering when Aubrey chuckled; there was a teasing glint in the blonde's eyes as she brought the cup to her lips and took a gulp that Stacie immediately knew she was going to regret. The brunette felt Aubrey literally shudder against her as she swallowed the liquid before the blonde leaned forward coughing. Stacie laughed loudly and reached out to pat Aubrey's back.
"This is… disgusting!" Aubrey sputtered. She became keenly aware of Stacie's hand, which had transitioned from patting her back to rubbing light circles. Aubrey wanted to lean into the touch but instead took another gulp of the liquid.
"Stop drinking it then!" Stacie laughed as she took a sip of her own drink. She watched in a sort of impressed awe when instead of stopping Aubrey finished her drink in a few more swigs.
"Stacie!" Both Stacie and Aubrey turned to the voice and watched Beca march across the room towards them, closely followed by Chloe. Aubrey felt Stacie's hand leave her back.
"Hey Becs!" Stacie grinned. She started to take another sip of her drink but Beca took it out of her hand. "Hey," Stacie whined with a pout, reaching to take the drink back.
"What happened to not drinking tonight?" Beca passed the cup to Chloe and out of the reach of Stacie.
"Aubrey started drinking before anyone was even here!"
"Aubrey isn't the one who told me not let her drink tonight, is she?" Beca turned to Aubrey. "Are you drunk?"
Aubrey's eyes narrowed. "That's none of your business. I don't need a babysitter."
Beca rolled her eyes. "Don't let her drink anymore." Beca left without another word. Chloe looked back and forth between Aubrey and Stacie a few times before turning to follow Beca.
"Why didn't you want to drink tonight?" Aubrey asked, her head swimming slightly as the alcohol started to work its way through her system.
Stacie leaned in closer to Aubrey. "I don't even remember," Stacie murmured. "Sober Stacie makes questionable decisions."
Aubrey leaned in too. "Are you sure it isn't because Drunk Stacie makes questionable decisions?" she teased. Stacie shrugged, smiling. Aubrey's eyes went to Stacie's mouth. "You have a pretty smile." She hadn't meant to say it out loud.
Stacie's smile widened into a grin. "Oh, is that so?" Aubrey nodded almost absentmindedly before her eyes snapped away from Stacie towards the kitchen where something had just crashed.
"It's hot in here. Isn't it hot in here?" Aubrey stood up quickly, the sudden shift in cushions causing Stacie to topple slightly into the space Aubrey had just been occupying. By the time Stacie had righted herself, she'd lost sight of where the blonde went.