Even the Dead Need a Break
If there is one good thing about this social distancing thing, it's that I am basically forced to stay at home and write Fanfiction. So ya'll can expect a more consistent upload schedule. So, thanks for that, society.
Luigi's Mansion 3 is owned by Nintendo.
"Ghosts, they're everywhere."
A Toad screamed in terror at the sight of a Greenie brewing coffee in his kitchen. The Greenie simply waved hi at the Toad while it waited for the coffee to finish.
"Sure, they're friendly, but the ability to faze through wells raises a myriad of security questions."
The Toad screamed again as he saw more ghosts showing up, asking him for sugar, sitting on his couch, and paying his taxes. This had to stop.
"Luckily for you, E. Gadd Electronics has you covered."
Dialing a number on the phone, the Toad called in the ones who would save the day, and a construction crew of other toads, along with a few ghosts, arrived at his house.
"Thanks to our patented Ectoplasm Repelling Alloys, our ghost proofing team will line the walls and doors of any building, turning them into impenetrable walls that no ghost can faze through. Say goodbye to all those sleepless nights, worrying that a ghost may suddenly break in."
An army of ghosts constantly bumped on the walls of the house like flies bumping into glass, all the while the Toad slept the night away without a care in the world.
"E. Gadd Electronics! For all your undead needs!"
Once the commercial was over, the channel returned to its regularly scheduled program: True Ghost Stories. A show about family's recounting terrifying encounters with the supernatural. For the ghosts watching the show, it was one of the best comedies ever made.
"Say, am I the only one who finds that commercial ta be just the slightest bit offensive? I'm just wondering." Captain Fishook asked the other residents of the room, while on tv, the wife was slowly approaching a banging cupboard.
"Well, the reasons behind it are legitimate." Serpci said from her spot on the couch, taking a bite out of her chips as the wife entered the kitchen. "With our powers, most people would want to upgrade their security."
"And it helps with keeping in ghost prisoners. I would have killed ta have that technology back in my day. Line the walls and the bars, and no ghost would be able ta escape." MacFrights pointed out from the other side of the couch, watching in anticipation.
The wife slowly opened the cupboard, over dramatic music backing the scene. When the cupboard was fully opened, the music stop, since there was nothing there. Sighing in relief, the wife closed the cupboard door… and was overcome with mind numbing terror when a ghost was standing behind it.
As the woman shrieked in terror, the three ghosts watching the show laughed uproariously.
"PFAHAHAA, aaagh, the classic fake out, ye gotta love that one." Fishook said as he calmed down.
"Indeed. I remember when I did that to the excavation team that found me. Yes, they dropped one of my favorite vases, but I consider it a worthwhile sacrifice."
"Oh, there you are!" Chambrea popped her head through the door, getting their attention. "Steward wants us for another meeting. Miss Serpci is invited too. You're going to love what he's going to show us."
Giving each other looks of excitement, the three ancient ghosts followed the maid out of the room and towards the elevator, leaving the television on. If they had stayed a few seconds longer, they would have had a good laugh at the wife finding the illusion of a dead body in her bathtub. That was another good one.
"- and then the man wakes up to his missing skeleton and has to somehow maneuver himself to reclaim it from the evil doctor who stole it. I still have to figure out the mechanics behind that one, but I do believe it would make a great scene."
Ignoring Morty's ramblings about his film "Doctor's Without Borders," the other ghosts chatted about with each other, in a good mood due to how well the season had gone for them. They were mainly discussing their vacation plans for the slow Season, which was fast approaching. Unbeknownst to them, their plans had already been made for them.
The sound of the door opening caught their attention, mainly because they so rarely needed to actually open it, and they saw their favorite VIP guest/savior, Luigi, along with his brother… err Merlo-no, Marco, uhm… Red Luigi? Yeah, that, enter the room.
"Hey, everybody!" The green plumber greeted the gathering of ghosts, who all happily returned it with ones of their own. He and his brother stood in front of them to deliver them the news they wanted to give. "You guys must be wondering why we came over."
"Indeed. I was in the middle of planning my week off." Amadeus Wolfgeist said. "Hopefully you have a better idea other than "struggle through artists block." The pianist received a reassuring pat on the back from Morty.
"Well we definitely do." The red ex-plumber handed out the tickets to the ghosts one by one and watched with a smile on his face as they slowly realized what was in their hands meant for them.
"You're sending us on an all expenses paid weekend stay in Delfino Island?!" Kruller glowed as Mario and Luigi gave nods of affirmation. "That's, like, the number one vacation spot on "Odyssey Across Vacation Destinations!" How did you get these?"
"I'd, uhh, not get into that."
Excitement grew amongst the ghost as they stared in awe at their tickets, new plans brewing in their minds over the possibilities this vacation could offer them. Sampling the local delicacies in order to expand his ghostly pallet for Soulfflë. Gaining inspiration from the sights and venues for Amadeus and Morty. Getting to examine the local plant life for research for Dr. Potter. Everyone's minds were racing with what they could do.
"Is there a catch? Will we owe you our souls? How much cash do you want?" Ginny and Lindsey clamped their hands over Nikki's mouth as she started to spout out her suspicions on the too-good-to-be true offer. Luigi just chuckled at the middle triplet's antics.
"No, no, this is all because you've been working very hard these past few weeks. Plus, with everything that happened with Mr. Graves last time, me and my bro thought you guys could use a break." The green plumber smiled bashfully at the looks of gratitude the ghosts were giving him.
"We've already talked with Dr. E. Gadd, and he says it's okay to go." Mario presented the door out of the meeting room to the ghosts. "So, what are you waiting for? The plane leaves tomorrow in the morning, so you better start packing!"
With excitement and cheer coursing through their non-existent veins, the staff at the Last Resort started to leave the room, giving their thanks to the Mario brothers for their gift. The two brothers could only share a lighthearted chuckle between the two as they saw the ghosts spread out across the hotel.
"You have the best ideas, bro."
"Heh, definitely."
"And I expect you to keep the piano clean and my musical sheets properly organized. If I see anything even slightly out of the ordinary, I will shove you into a toilet. Understood?" Amadeus threatened hisballet goobs, having finished packing his bag with notebooks, hair care products and some of his finest suits. The lead goob of the group simply gave a dopey salute as the pianist left the auditorium.
"And I need you to make sure my baby's room remains in the temperature I've written down for you. If I find even a hint of distress in my precious babies, I will be serving moron to them as an apology for leaving them with said moron. Understood?" Serpci threatened the slinker who she was charging with the care of her precious snakes. When the slinker responded with a nervous salute, satisfying Serpci, she grabbed her bag, made her way to Gloria, who had finished packing all her clothes, wigs and mixtapes. They looped their arms together and left for the lobby.
"And I need you to follow the instructions exactly, otherwise, what happens to my plants will be on you. And let me tell you, Venus gets cranky when she doesn't get her feed on time." Dr. Potter threatened the oozer in charge of taking care of the doctor's greenhouse in his absence. The oozer nodded fearfully, briefly glancing at the titular plant, and flinched when she looked at him. Satisfied, Potter grabbed his rucksack full of botany textbooks and equipment for analysis. There were a lot of things he wanted to investigate on that island.
"And I need you to keep an eye on the others and make sure they follow the cleaning schedules to the letter. Otherwise… no, wait, forget I said that. I don't know why I would punish you guys for something so silly." Chambrea and the hammer she was charging with keeping the cleaning staff in line shared a chuckle at the ludicrous thought. She waved goodbye at the hammer as she left the floor, grabbing her bag filled with magazines, cleaning supplies and empty spaces in the event something interesting caught her attention enough to take back. She made her way to the museum floor to pick up Ug, who, while not having anything to take with him to Delfino, was very excited at the prospect of getting things to take back.
"Ah, the salty sea. Soon, you and I will be reunited at last." Fishook stared long fully at the bus, already imagining himself gracefully swimming in the ocean's of Delfino. Next to him, MacFrights dragged a sack that was full of weapons and armor towards the bus.
"Well, while you enjoy yer time gallivanting with the marine life, I myself shall be doing something productive with my time. Vanquishing the deadly beast of the sea: The Great White Shark!"
"Ya can't bring weapons with ya, Mac."
"What!" The king turned to the owner of the comment, Clem, flabbergasted at the insanity of such a rule. "Since when did they create such a blasted rule? A king can't be seen without at least one sword hidden on their person?"
The mechanic paused from stuffing his luggage into the bus's luggage compartment, which judging by the squeaks was full of rubber ducks, to lean on the vehicle. "Aeroplanes and metal objects don't really like each other. By the way, Fishook, ya might wanna figure out what ta do with that hook of yers if ya wanna get on the plane."
"But I feel naked without it?" The floating ghost shark hugged his hook protectively.
"Luckily for you, my ancient historical friends, I have solved the problem for you!" And there came Morty, wheeling a trolley filled with cases of filming equipment out of the hotel. "I asked Luigi if perchance I would be able to bring my personal instruments of creation, and he said that they had contacted the airport and struck a deal with them. As long as we pack our most dangerous or fragile of objects separately, they will deliver them to the hotel we are staying in, free of charge!"
MacFrights and Fishook let out sighs of relief. Thank goodness for that.
"If I may, Mr. MacFrights?" The old king was startled by Ginny, who had spoken up from right behind him. In the background, Lindsey and Nikki were dragging their large amounts of luggage towards the bus. Well, Lindsey was doing most of the work, while Nikki discreetly snuck some of her cargo onto Lindsey's stack, to the latter's ignorance. "But I don't think you can just go into the ocean and kill a shark. That's, like, super illegal."
"On several, hurk, levels too." Lindsey finally dropped her cargo on the floor, glaring at Nikki before addressing the king. "Apparently, they're endangered."
"But there's a service on the island that lets you wrestle sharks." Nikki added with a wicked grin on her face.
"That shall do!"
As the others lined up into the bus, leaving Clem to store their stuff, the mechanic examined the suspiciously large pile of luggage the girls had brought with them. "Girls."
"Yes dad?" x3
"Whatcha bringing with ya? Cuz I'm pretty sure ya three don't have nearly enough stuff ta need this many bags."
"Oh, it's nothing incriminating. Just clothes and junk."
"Also magic stuff! As professional magicians, we have to stay in tip top shape constantly, you know?" Nikki and Lindsey hurriedly explained.
Not at all satisfied, Clem turned to the youngest of the triplets, who was looking very nervous under his gaze. He used the secret weapon of his that always made Ginny automatically spill the beans of whatever scheme the sisters had planned out of guilt: The Eyebrow Raise of Doubt!
"… It's prank stuff." Ginny hung her head in shame. The Eyebrow Raise of Doubt never failed to get the truth out of her. One of the bags, as if on cue, fell off the pile and landed open, letting all of the chattering teeth, joy buzzers and jack-in-the boxes spill out.
"Grab the bags with yer clothes and take em inside. Ah'll bring everything back inside." The triplets hung their heads in shame, grabbed their bags and did as they were told. As soon as they were out of sight, Clem started grabbing the bags, casually tossed one of them into the open luggage compartment and carried them towards the lobby.
"No orders?"
"Nope."
"No to-do lists?"
"Only the one you make for yourself."
"Oh, so like, until I get more orders?"
Kruller groaned as he tried, and maybe failed, to explain to Steward the basics of what a vacation entailed. Working for Hellen really did another on the poor bellhop's psyche.
"Ugh, you guys say vacations are supposed to be for de-stressing, but now I'm even more stressed. I'm still getting used to the new status quo, I can't handle this much autonomy!"
"Well, if you can't handle thinking for yourself, why don't you just follow the brochure?" Johnny Deepend, currently carrying his luggage on his biceps, piped up while exiting the elevator, having overheard the conversation.
"Is-is that an insult? Cause I feel insulted right now."
"Nah, it's just a suggestion. I pretty much always just follow the stuff on the brochure when I go on vacation. Don't you always carry that kind of stuff on your person, Kruller?"
Understanding the swimmer's idea, Kruller dug inside his pocket for the brochure for Delfino Island he had picked up from the gift shop. He handed it over to Steward, who examined the contents inside. A look of understanding came over him as he read up on all that he would be doing on his vacation, specifically the order it was set on. Something to tell him what to do!"
"Oi! Ze bus is fully packed! We are leaving now!" Chef Soulfflë shouted from outside. "You do not want to incur my wrath by making us late to the airport, non?!"
Kruller and Johnny rushed to the bus, leaving behind Steward to give the remaining employee's their final orders.
"You guys all know what to do, right?"
The goob, hammer, oozer and slinker all gave him a salute and an affirmative nod. Finally satisfied that the hotel was not (probably) going to be a molten wreckage when he came back, Steward made his way to the bus, genuinely looking forward to this 'vacation' thing in Delfino Island.
The oozer peered through the window, watching the bus leave with its passengers and drive into the horizon. When she could no longer see it, the oozer gave a thumbs up to the group. "They're gone!"
"Is the doc gone too?" The hammer asked.
"Yup. Heard he left for some sort of science symposium in Beanbean." The slinker answered.
"Welp, I guess all we can do is do exactly what our bosses told us for the whole weekend."
They all nodded to the goobs comment, letting silence wash over the empty lobby.
…
…
The goob calmly took out a lampshade and planted it over her head as the other ghosts spread the news across the hotel. It's party time!
Next time, the ghosts enjoy the luxuries of the tropical vacation destination that is Delfino Island, and cap it off with a party. And absolutely nothing goes wrong in the slightest.
Also, I think when I finish this story, I'll be dropping off the LM3 fandom in order to focus on writing stories involving my OC's! It's about time I started using these goobers more often.