Episode 1 - Getting to Know Your Inner Freak

Freakazoid took a moment to examine his new surroundings.

"Huh. Bonded to a nerd again. But he's an otaku for once, that's new, I can work with that," the cyberspace-borne superhero said to himself. He then looked towards the bedroom window. "Now just where am I these days?" he mused as he pulled out a pair of binoculars and took a look outside. His observations darted all over the place.

"Hmm...Mt. Fuji...KIMONO GIRLS...the Budokan...KIMONO GIRLS...bullet trains...KIMONO GIRLS...KIMONO GIRLS...KIMONO GIRLS...Of course, it all adds up: I've somehow emerged in Tierra del Fuego!" The sight of a sign that said Welcome to Tokyo-3 made him realize his slight mistake. "Waitasec-Tokyo-3? What happened to the first two?" He then aimed his binoculars where, sure enough, he did see the skylines of Tokyo-1 and Tokyo-2. "Boy, things've really changed in the time I've been out of the loop. That Second Impact thing must've done a number on ol' mother Earth." He then put his binoculars away. "I sure could go for some tacos right now."

At that moment, Freakazoid vanished in a flash of light, leaving a confused Kensuke where he was standing.

"Huh?" he wondered, rubbing the side of his head. A small feeling of panic emerged as he quickly dashed to the bathroom and locked the door. He then turned to look in the mirror, thoroughly examining his face.

"Wha-what's going on? What's happened to me?" he wondered.

Yo, Kensuke! a voice called from out of nowhere. Kensuke turned about, looking for the source of that call.

Getting warmer, just look down here! the voice said, causing Kensuke to warily look down towards his stomach. Nervously, he slowly lifted up the front of his shirt. What he saw made his eyes go wide, as the face of Freakazoid smiled back up at him.

"HI THERE!" Freakazoid greeted enthusiastically.

"AAAHHH!" Kensuke cried out as he pushed the front of his shirt back down. "NONONONONO! This isn't happening, this isn't happening...!"

As he turned back around, Freakazoid spoke again.

Now let's see you unzip your head! he implored.

"WHAT?!" Kensuke asked, bewildered.

You heard me, unzip your head! Like this! Freakazoid replied as his gloved hand popped out of Kensuke's mouth and proceeded to unzip Kensuke's head, revealing Freakazoid's underneath. Freakazoid then looked our way.

"Still pretty gross, right?" he asked. Kensuke somehow managed to then grab hold of the zipper and zip himself back together. The fact that he did so further left him frightened.

"Don't do that!" he said, only for Freakazoid to unzip his head again.

"Do what?" Freakazoid teasingly asked, while Kensuke zipped himself back up again.

"Stop unzipping my head!" the otaku replied, further unnerved. "This REALLY can't be happening..." At that moment, he heard a knock on the door.

"Kensuke?" Toshio Aida, the boy's father, said on the other side of the door. "Are you okay in there?"

CRUD! Kensuke thought. How to respond..."Uh, I'm all right dad, I just uh...it's just a zit! Nothing more! Just freaking over nothing!"

"Okay then," Toshio replied, his legs crossing as he squirmed, "but do you think you can freak out somewhere else? I have to tinkie."

Kensuke then opened the door and exited the bathroom, much to his father's relief, and headed back into his bedroom. Once in, he closed the door and started pacing nervously back and forth, almost overwhelmed by what was going on.

"Okay, there's gotta be an explanation," he said to try and reassure himself. "Maybe it was just a short-circuit, and the brightness on my computer was up all the way. That's it!"

Sorry, kid, it's real all right, came the voice of Freakazoid. Kensuke, upon hearing that, collapsed onto his bed.

"Man..." Kensuke sighed. "Great...so, what exactly are you, anyway?"

Oh, what, you haven't heard? Freakazoid asked in a dramatic, faux-Shakespearean fashion. Surely even you've heard tales of the wacky derring-do of Freakazoid?

Kensuke's eyes widened upon hearing this. "Wait, Freakazoid?! As in THE Freakazoid?!" He bolted back up from the bed. "The superhero? The one who disappeared before the start of the millennium?!" His eyes remained wide as the revelation sunk in. "I thought you were just a rumor!...And based in America, last I checked."

Well, you're right on the money both ways! Freakazoid said. It's true, I did call Washington, D.C. home, back when I was 'rooming' with a geek like you. (I oughta check in on Dexter, now that I think about it.) He then slipped on a pair of old party glasses shaped like the number 2000. Then came New Year's Eve, 1999...Take it away, Paul!

The scene then cut to a study occupied by one Paul Harvey, leaning on his desk, a pipe in-hand as he addressed us, the audience.

"Where was Freakazoid all this time indeed?" Paul asked rhetorically. "Why was this boy in red long underwear with a high voltage hairstyle gone for the first decade and a half of the twenty-first century? To answer these questions, we must go back to before the dawn of the new millennium..."

A flashback ensued as Paul recounted where Freakazoid was on the final night of the twentieth century.

"On that very night, Freakazoid had separated himself from his human alter-ego Dexter Douglas, and dove headfirst into cyberspace to fight one of the biggest villains to emerge on the web: the Y2K Bug, who was threatening to plunge the world into a new Dark Age by ruining the entirety of the global computer networks. It was a long, dragged-out, and at times completely silly showdown, with neither foe giving way, until finally, Freakazoid managed to stop the Bug by pointing out the wonders of the world he'd be depriving people of, like the Biggest Ball of Twine in Minnesota, or the Nathan's Famous Hot Dog-eating contest. Moved by Freakazoid's words, the Bug surrendered and was imprisoned in a floppy disk, shipped off to parts unknown. What Freakazoid didn't know was that due to the length of time he'd spent fighting the Bug, the pathways to return to the real world had closed as new system upgrades were installed the world over. Thus, Freakazoid was stuck in the Web, keeping up with the world as much as he could, becoming aware of the years that followed Second Impact. This accidental exile also gave him a lot of time to indulge in his hobbies, and catch marathons of a lot of classic, wholesome television...

And now you KNOW The Rest of the Backstory...Good day!"

With that, the scene shifted back to Kensuke's bedroom.

"Did we just seriously go through a flashback?" Kensuke asked, bewildered. "And hold on-didn't Paul Harvey die six years ago?"

Kensuke, my man, THAT is the beauty of both stock footage and dubbing by a professional voice actor with a good sense of imitation, Freakazoid explained as he then began to address us. "How about a big hand for the amazing Paul Rugg, everybody!"

Upon hearing that, applause ensued as Paul Rugg, in a live-action sequence, gave two thumbs-up from his spot in a recording booth.

Kensuke merely scratched his head in confusion, before returning to the main point of the conversation.

"So now you're back, and I basically trade places with you whenever trouble's afoot?" he asked.

You betcha, kid! Freakazoid replied. And that is your first lesson in 'Superheroing with Freakazoid'! Basically, we each have a code phrase that controls the transformation. Need me to fight some crime? Simply say 'Freak Out!'. When all's said and done, I just say 'Freak in!', and you're back in time for dinner. Buckle up, Kensuke, 'cause we've got a looooonnnnggg journey ahead of us. I can smell it in the air, the public's in the mood for a hero now, and I've got a lot of evil-doers to battle, cats to save from trees, reruns of Svengoolie to catch up on! Stick with me, kid, and everything'll be A-O-KAY!

Kensuke face-palmed as he shook his head. "And they said the teen years are the most challenging..." he lamented.

To be continued...