A few blocks down the road at a private facility for photography Serena is finishing up her interview.
"We would be happy to have you on the team to help with scheduling and paperwork, Serena, but I know for a fact that you've also been in front of the camera for work before. I also know you stated you don't wish to do that any longer, but if an opportunity presents itself and we need an extra person, would you step up?" Rachel, the manager asks.
"Well, certainly. I won't deny an opportunity, especially for the company," Serena replies.
"Wonderful. Glad to have you with us," Rachel says.
"Glad to be here, thank you," Serena responds as she shakes Rachel's hand, gathers her belongings and exits the building.
As Serena makes her way to her vehicle she's fumbling for her keys and accidentally bumps into someone. She looks up from the ground to see a handsome man rising from the ground himself and dusting off his slacks.
"Are you alright?" The man asks as he extends his hand out for Serena to take. Serena does take it and nods her head.
"I'm so sorry, I was looking for my keys instead of where I was going," Serena says.
"Quite alright. Happens to the best of us. I'm Henry."
"I'm Serena."
"Nice to meet you," Henry says.
"Well, I wish I didn't have to knock both of us down in order to meet, but likewise," Serena says with a laugh.
Henry laughs a little too.
"Are you working here?" Henry inquires.
"Just got the job," Serena replies.
"Well congratulations. I guess I'll be seeing a lot of you then," Henry says with a smile and wink.
Serena just smiles back and blushes slightly.
"I do have to run, but could we swap numbers? Just in case," Henry says.
"In case of what?" Serena asks.
"In case I need to be knocked to the ground by a beautiful woman again," Henry replies.
Serena softly gasps, but then smiles shyly.
"You're quite charming, but I do already have a prince," Serena says.
"Lucky guy, but still, just in case you need a friend. This job can be overwhelming at times," Henry says.
"Fine, just for the sake of having a new friend," Serena agrees.
They exchange numbers and then head their separate ways.
Dan is currently still in his room only now he's eating a large bag of chips on his bed and drinking a large glass of chocolate milk when he suddenly hears his phone ring. He picks it up to see Serena's name appear. Dan answers it and Serena informs him that she got the job. He congratulates her but does ask why she didn't mention to him this morning that she planned on skipping out on the cafe altogether. Serena explains she thought she would go, but changed her mind last minute. Dan wonders in his mind if that's really true, but lets it go and instead decides to take Serena out to celebrate tonight. Serena becomes excited and says she can't wait to see him in a bit before hanging up.
Dan wipes crumbs off his shirt and the chocolate mustache from his face. He gets up from the bed, strips down, walks into the shower with a change of clothes and washes away the dirt from his body. Dan also tries to wash away the feeling of guilt and confusion, but can't seem to.
A few minutes pass and soon Jenny hears a knock at the door. She opens the door and is surprised to see Serena there.
"Hey, how are you?" Serena asks Jenny.
"I'm fine. How are you? And Dan? How are you and Dan doing? Jenny asks.
"Well, I'm fine and so are Dan and I. I got the job by the way!" Serena replies.
"Oh, congratulations! Come inside," Jenny says.
Serena walks inside and Jenny closes the door behind her.
"Where's Dan?" Serena inquires.
"In his room," Jenny replies.
"Oh. He mentioned he's taking me out to celebrate tonight," Serena says.
"Oh, great. Well, feel free to head inside. I'm sure he's expecting you," Jenny says as she walks down the hall and goes into her room.
Serena walks up to Dan's door, but then stops when she feels her phone buzz. She pulls it out of her pocket and gazes down at Henry's name. Henry has texted her a photo of a magazine shoot she did a while ago with her photo on it and says he knew she was gorgeous but had no idea she was an actual model. He also asks her if she'll be modeling along side him at work. She replies no and said she applied for a front desk position where she'll mainly be setting up schedules and filing paper work. After replying to Henry she knocks on Dan's door, but when nothing happens she opens the door and steps into his room. She gets confused when she doesn't see Dan, but then realizes he's taking a shower once she hears the water running.
"Dan, I'm here!" Serena shouts.
Dan, who's almost through with showering suddenly hears Serena's voice from his room announcing she's there.
"Alright, almost done!" Dan shouts back.
Dan quickly shakes his head, wipes away more tears from his face, turns off the water, grabs a towel while drying himself off with it and changes into the new clothes he had brought inside with him.
Dan opens the door and walks into his room. Serena smiles at him and embraces him in a hug. He hugs her back and then pats her on the back while congratulating her once more.
"Thanks," Serena says.
"So, how about a quick stroll through the park and then your favorite restaurant?" Dan asks.
Serena nods and they both head out the door, walk through the hallway and then exit through the front door. Dan locks the door and also quickly texts Jenny to let her know where he's going. The two head into Dan's car and drive to the nearby park down the street. Once there they exit the car, hold hands and walk through the park and over to the lake where they can see some ducks waddling around, children riding on their bikes and couples walking around. They make their way to a bench and have a seat together on it.
"This is nice," Serena says as she takes a deep breath while smiling.
"Yeah," Dan says.
"Did you have to wear that shirt, though? It's a bit wrinkled and it doesn't match your pants. Also, what's with your hair? Did you even dry it?" Serena asks.
"Whoa, what's with the attack? I think I look fine," Dan replies.
"Well, you look fine, if we were staying at home," Serena says.
"Wow, classic, Serena. You always do this. Can't you just be with me for me? And if it was so important to you about how I looked why didn't you say anything back in my room?" Dan inquires.
"Because I felt we were in a rush and I didn't really notice until now," Serena replies.
"You mean you didn't notice until other people were looking," Dan says.
"What is your problem, Dan? You think you're so smart, yet you can't match your clothing and you don't bother to make sure your clothes aren't wrinkled. Plus, I feel like you should have been ready before I got there. And why did Jenny ask how we were? Did you mention something to her that would have led her to believe we're not okay?" Serena asks.
"Just calm down, Serena. I'm sure Jenny only asked out of curiosity and if it's so important to you I'll drive back home and change," Dan replies.
"No it's fine, I'm used to it," Serena says.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Dan inquires.
"You know Dan, they offered me to model at the job, even though we agreed I wouldn't because it was way too stressful for me last time, but maybe if I had you there with me modeling along side me I wouldn't feel so stressed, but they would never take you looking like that," Serena replies.
"Looking like what?" Dan asks angrily.
"Unkempt," Serena replies.
"I'm done. I'm not sitting here just to listen to you tell me how I don't look good enough according to your standards. But then again it's not your standards, Serena. If it were, you would never have dated me. It's obviously other people's opinions that matter and I don't know what happened at your interview today, but I have a feeling you're coming out with all of this because of something that happened there. Whatever it is, though, I don't really care. Can we just please leave?" Dan says.
"Serena?" A man walking towards the two says.
"Henry?" Serena replies.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" Henry inquires.
"I'm here with him."
"Your boyfriend," Dan chimes in.
"Right, sorry Dan. That's what I meant to say," Serena says.
"Ah, so you're her prince charming," Henry says to Dan.
"I don't know about charming, or prince, but I am her boyfriend," Dan replies.
"I just met Serena today at work. Lovely girl. Are you two celebrating her achievement in getting hired?" Henry questions.
"We were," Serena replies.
"We, yeah, we were, but I actually have to run. Serena, I'll take you back to my place to your car. Are you coming?" Dan asks.
Serena thinks about it for a moment and then responds. "Dan, I know what you have to do is important, so I won't take up any more of your time. I'm sure Henry could give me a lift."
"Of course, but it would be a shame not to celebrate your new employment. Would you allow me to show you a good time?
Serena freezes for a moment, unsure of what to say, but then looks over at Dan and narrows her eyes at him.
"Sounds fun," Serena replies as she grabs Henry's hand and walks off with him, leaving Dan in the dust.
Dan feels humiliated and in the past he would have run after Serena to stop her, but this time he just watches her walk away with Henry and somehow feels very calm. He wonders if it's because the argument he and Serena had is for the moment over, or if it's because he no longer feels extremely guilty being with her after being with Chuck. Perhaps, though, it could be because she makes him feel so stressed, so low about himself and makes him feel sad. He wonders why he feels unloved and no spark anymore for Serena. He also wonders if Chuck was right when he said there was no spark that lasted enough to become a flame.
He starts to really question his love and his intention of being with Serena in that very moment. Is he just with her because she caught his attention and was nice? Because she's still beautiful, but not so beautiful that he can't look at anyone else and not so beautiful that she melts his heart. When Dan holds Serena, there's comfort he feels. When Dan held Chuck, there was passion he felt. When Dan kisses Serena, he enjoys it and he feels turned on, but when he kissed Chuck, he felt alive and his whole body felt as if it were on fire. Dan smiles at the thought of Chuck and he starts to wonder how he's doing right now.
Meanwhile, Chuck and Blair are almost finished setting up for dinner.
"What are you doing?!" Blair spits in disgust at Chuck who is setting out blue plates onto the table.
"What?"
"The table is white with white cloth and you dare to set blue plates onto it? Are you out of your mind? Why do I deserve to deal with such stupidity!" Blair says as she quickly picks up all the blue plates and stomps off into the kitchen.
"Blair, they have white flowers on them, I thought it would look fine," Chuck states as he follows her into the kitchen.
"Normally, I wouldn't care because you're not that stupid to just grab random, plain, blue plates to set them onto a completely white set dinner table, but Chuck, these are obviously a much better choice," Blair replies as she holds up a white plate with pink flowers designed onto it.
"My apologies, I didn't see that one."
"They were behind the ones you chose," Blair says as she rolls her eyes and walks quickly past Chuck.
Chuck watches Blair as she storms back off to the table and wonders how he was ever able to put up with her unappreciative, loud and cruel personality. He then remembers that she can also be sweet, brave and cunning, but lately it seems as though her bad traits outweigh her good ones. Chuck thought he loved Blair, but perhaps the love she filled in his heart wasn't strong enough to stay and so it slipped out without warning, yet Chuck is still here; still with her, when moments before his heart felt full and bright with Dan and that feeling is still there.
"Hey, I feel it, too," Dan says as he stands next to Chuck holding his hand.
Chuck blinks twice and looks at the imaginary Dan before him that his mind has produced.
Blair suddenly drops a plate by the table as she hears a piercing scream from Chuck in the kitchen. Blair rushes in with a look of bewilderment and concern etched across her face as she sees Chuck washing his hands repeatedly, while also splashing water onto his face.
"What happened?! Are you hurt?" Blair questions as she runs up to Chuck and looks him over.
Chuck freezes, then calmly turns the water off and dries his hands and face with a nearby towel.
"Sorry, there was something on my hands and face."
"What was it?"
"How should I know? It was just disgusting so I washed it off, obviously."
"Well, your foolish behavior lost me a plate!" Blair shouts in Chucks face as she once more storms back off to the table.
Chuck rolls his eyes and starts walking back to the table where Blair is, but stops when he sees imaginary Dan smirking at him to his left. Chuck closes his eyes and shakes his head.
"Chuck, what are you doing now? Stop wasting time! They'll be here any minute!" Blair says as she walks past him and rushes up to her bedroom.
Chuck opens his eyes while scanning the room for the imaginary Dan and sighs in relief when he can't find him anywhere.
Back in the park where Serena left him in the dust is Dan as he walks along the path trying his hardest just to breathe from the suffocation he feels from Serena treating him like trash and then throwing him away. He also feels suffocation from Chuck as his feelings keep growing for him with each step he takes.
Dan suddenly stops walking, closes his eyes, throws his hands in the air and screams at the top of his lungs in frustration.
Dan then opens his eyes quickly at the sound of a baby crying to the right of him.
"Freak," A woman pushing the crying baby says as she quickly walks by while giving Dan a dirty look.
Dan sighs and pulls out his phone looking through the contacts until he realizes the name he's looking for isn't there. Dan pushes on Nate's name and quickly sends him a text asking for Chuck's number. Nate replies soon asking what for and Dan just says Chuck has something of his. Nate soon gives him the number and Dan starts to feel guilty for lying, but then realizes he isn't. After all, Chuck does have something of Dan's; his heart.
Back at Blair's place Chuck is currently sitting on her couch with his eyes closed picturing himself far away from everyone while sipping on alcohol to his hearts content. Speaking of his heart, Chuck wonders how it even works. Chuck's been with Blair this whole time and as hard as he's tried to feel happy and loved with her, instead he's felt lost. Blair seemed perfect, she's beautiful, strong, ruthless, determined, yet she never made Chuck feel like he was any of those things. She made him feel very small at times.
Chuck thinks about Dan and how he easily made him feel like brand new for the first time and that he could be or do anything he wanted. Chuck thinks back to how Dan bravely came over to him and asked what's wrong and was even willing to put their differences aside in order to be a friend to him. He then thinks back to how hot Dan looked soaking wet from the rain and even though Chuck was freezing from the rain, it wasn't Dan's car that made him warm up, but instead Dan's arms around him holding on tight. Chuck never saw Dan as anything before, but the way Dan looked at Chuck today made his heart want to burst right out of his chest, for no one, not even Blair, has ever looked at him like that before. Dan looked at Chuck today with soft, understanding, compassionate, brown eyes that melted him right on the spot.
However, Chuck was scared. He's always been with girls and had been known to be somewhat of a player, but now with Blair he thought he had finally found the one and when he started realizing that he may have made a mistake being with her he couldn't figure out why. Blair truly had it all and for a while did make Chuck swoon, but soon Chuck realized that he was more interested in the attention he received for dating Blair rather then the attention Blair actually gave him. To Chuck, Blair seemed more like a partner in crime then a partner in love. He just wasn't attracted anymore, but then again maybe he was never romantically attracted to her to begin with.
Yet, falling for a guy, especially if that guy is dating Serena would be risky. It could hurt his status forever, not to mention his friendship with Blair and Serena, but he doesn't want to lose what he felt with Dan either. Chuck suddenly opens his eyes and reaches into his pocket for his phone due to it alerting him of a message. He looks at his screen in bewilderment as he starts reading a message from an unknown number. The unknown number is telling Chuck that it's Dan.
Dan is asking if Chuck is okay and said he got his number from Nate. Chuck quickly replies saying he's fine and not to text him anymore.
"Why not?"
"Because you were a mistake."
Back in the park Dan sighs in frustration once more and decides to walk back to his car and head home. As Dan is driving home he considers leaving Chuck alone, but his heart seems to be forbidding it. Soon, back at Blair's place, her mom and new love interest finally arrive and with Chuck they all have a nice meal together. Blair and Chuck be sure to put on a good show and afterward Chuck drives home. When he arrives back at his place he kicks off his shoes, shuts his phone off, crawls under the covers of his bed and cries himself to sleep.
The next day rolls in and Dan turns over in his bed awoken from the alarm set on his phone. He hits snooze and buries his face deep into his pillow, however the moment of feeling warm and cozy in his bed is short lived due to Jenny throwing his door open and jumping onto him screaming for him to wake up. Dan shoves her off, yet complies with Jenny as she then laughs and walks out of his room. Upon waking up, Dan wondered if what happened between him and Chuck was just a dream, but remembered it too vividly for it not to actually have happened. Dan should feel upset about this fact, yet he can't hide the joy within him at the realization that everything he did and felt with Chuck was real; not just a dream.
Meanwhile, Chuck never went to sleep and is currently sitting in his bed with five empty beer bottles laying around him. Chuck wondered all night why he can't just move on from Dan and it took him till the early morning to realize that it's the same reason as to why he doesn't love Blair. It's a feeling. You can control your words and your actions. You can choose to speak or be silent and you can choose to do something good or bad or nothing at all.
You can even choose to change your mind; your thoughts, but you can't turn a switch off within yourself that allows your feelings to go away or change because they're not produced within your mind; they come from your heart; your soul even and you just can't change that; nobody can. A feeling stays with you forever like a memory. Chuck moves himself from the bed and quickly jumps into the shower and tries to wash everything away, even though he can't. He steps out, gets dressed and leaves his humble abode to enter the busy, dirty, loud and blurry streets of the city that never sleeps. Chuck walks for a while and his vision starts to clear from all the drinking and he slowly starts walking normally again.
Chuck looks around and wants to scream, but doesn't feel like drawing any unwanted attention. Chuck looks over to his right and notices a familiar vehicle pulling up to the curb.
"Have a good day, babe."
"Thanks, you too."
Chuck watches as a strange man kisses the brother of Serena and then walks away up into a building.
"Chuck?" Eric says.
"Oh, hey," Chuck replies with a wave of his hand.
"What are you doing out here so early? And why do you look like some kid in college who took too many body shots at three in the morning?"
"Are you speaking from experience?" Chuck questions.
"Obviously," Eric replies with a wink.
Chuck rolls his eyes. "Right, well it's not my best day."
"Would some company and another alcoholic beverage with a splash of orange juice help?"
"You drink mimosas?" Chuck scoffs.
"All the fruity people do," Eric replies with a smirk.
Chuck rolls his eyes again. "Let's just go before I change my mind."
Chuck enters Eric's car and Eric begins to drive. As they drive along they both stay silent as Eric concentrates on the road and Chuck concentrates on his hands folded neatly across his lap.
"We're here," Eric proclaims as he parks in a lot.
"This place?" Chuck questions with alarm.
"I heard you along with Blair, Nate and Vanessa came here the other day and I was rudely left out, so I'm coming here now with you," Eric replies.
"Dan was here, too," Chuck says under his breath, although Eric picks it up.
"Oh ,yeah. I forgot about him because Serena hadn't come due to an interview, but I guess Dan did show up, too," Eric says.
The two step out of the vehicle and head inside the Golden Rose Cafe. Chuck follows Eric to an empty booth in the corner and the two sit down facing each other. Eric grabs a menu by the corner of the table and begins to scan it over.
"They have good food here, expensive naturally, but good. What did you all order when you were here?" Eric questions.
"Blair ordered mimosas, caviar and eggs benedict for everyone. I'm not really hungry, though, so I'll just take the drink," Chuck replies.
"Hey, it's never good to drink on an empty stomach. Have something or leave. I won't be responsible for your stupidity when you get more drunk and pass out."
Chuck narrows his eyes at Eric. "Fine."
"Good morning, can I take your orders?" A woman says as she comes by their table.
"We'll both have one glass each of mimosas and the eggs benedict," Eric says as he closes the menu and hands it over.
The woman nods and walks away.
"So, why do you look like crap?"
Chuck scoffs at Eric. "Why should I have to explain myself to you?"
"Because I'm trying to help. Instead of being your usual cold self, maybe open up a bit and show me your warmth," Eric says as he folds his arms across his chest in annoyance.
Chuck sighs. "Look, I seem to be having a slight problem and don't know how to make it disappear."
"Is this problem a thing or a person?" Eric inquires.
"Neither; it's a feeling," Chuck replies.
Eric unfolds his arms across his chest and lays them by his side suddenly intrigued. "How are things with Blair, Chuck?"
"Why would you bring her up like that?" Chuck demands.
"Well, you said your problem is a feeling. Are you still feeling good with Blair?" Eric asks.
Chuck wonders if Eric can sense he's having problems with Blair. Chuck wonders if he can trust Eric.
"Can I ask you a personal question?"
"Go ahead," Eric says.
"Your drinks," the woman from says as she places mimosas in front of Eric and Chuck.
"Thank you," Eric says to her as he puts his lips up to the drink and sips on it waiting for Chuck to reply.
She nods and walks away.
"How did you know you were gay?"
Upon hearing Chuck ask that Eric chokes on the mimosa and starts coughing.
"Are you alright?" Chuck questions alarmed.
"I'm fine," Eric says as he stops coughing.
"Why would you ask me that?" Eric questions.
"Just curious," Chuck replies.
Eric looks at Chuck with confusion, but answers him regardless.
"Middle school. I used to try and date girls back then, but it just never felt right. One day I became friends with a boy and it turned out that boy was gay and made a move on me. At first I was disgusted and frightened, but then I couldn't stop thinking of him and so I went back to him and realized I felt more with him than I've felt with any girl before. It probably would have worked out great with him, too if he hadn't cheated on me and then asked if we could be friends with benefits. I almost foolishly agreed, too due to not knowing any better, but at the last moment I realized my worth and walked away."
"I see," Chuck replies.
"Why, are you gay?" Eric questions with a laugh.
Chuck stares at Eric and he wants to tell him no and laugh it off, but how can he.
Eric continues to laugh, but then stops when he notices Chuck isn't.
"Hey, why aren't you laughing?" Eric asks.
"Maybe I don't think it's funny," Chuck replies.
"Your food," the same woman says as she brings them the eggs benedict and sets it in front of them each and then walks away.
"I don't understand. When everyone found out I was gay all I got was judgement for it. Everyone laughed at me, you included," Eric says.
"I know. If I knew back then what I know now, I wouldn't have judged you; I wouldn't have laughed. I'm sorry," Chuck says.
"What is it that you know now that you didn't before?" Eric questions.
Chuck stares at Eric in fear for a moment and then sighs. "I didn't know being gay was something I could be. I didn't realize that it wasn't weird or disgusting, but rather normal and much more than I've had; much more than I ever knew I needed. It's not something I'm used to, but I can't seem to get the feeling of being attracted to another man out of my mind or heart and it scares me."
Eric stares at Chuck in disbelief. Eric wonders how a person like Chuck could ever be gay, but then realizes he never knew the same of himself long ago.
"Chuck, this is pretty shocking information, but listen, you don't need to be scared. Yes, it's a scary thing, especially when you're new to it and going through it alone, but you're not alone anymore. Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me this. I'm not sure what happened, but if you're still with Blair, you should probably end things with her. Even if whoever the guy is that you're attracted to is still confusing you because you don't really know if it was just a one time thing, you should still tell Blair the truth; she deserves that."
"I know she does, but it wouldn't just be hurting her if she knew the truth," Chuck says.
"What do you mean?"
"The guy I like, it would hurt the person he's with, too," Chuck replies.
"Oh, so you're both cheating. Well, good news is it would hurt whoever he's with, but that's not your concern. I mean, it's not like you know the person he's with."
"Actually, I do," Chuck says.
"What?"
Chuck looks down in shame.
"I think I'm confused. I'm understanding now that both you and this other guy cheated on your partners, but for how long? And who is this other person and how do you know the person he's with? Chuck, what exactly happened?" Eric questions.
"The guy and I had a one night stand. He was really nice to me and looked at me like no one else has before. And maybe others have, but I never noticed it until he did it. It was raining and he looked hot and I kept feeling things when he touched me and one thing led to another. Basically we did it in the back of his car and it couldn't have been more romantic. I loved every second of it, but it happened yesterday after coming here with the others," Chuck replies.
"Wait, so you randomly met this guy after being here yesterday? I mean, if that's the case then maybe take more time to get to know him. However, breaking Blair's heart wouldn't be the worst thing you could do, no offense. She's just kind of evil." Eric says.
"No offense taken, however it's not only her heart I'm worried about breaking."
"Right, you said you know the person who's with the guy you like, but whoever it is I'm sure they'd be fine. You shouldn't worry about it too much," Eric says.
"It's Serena," Chuck says.
Eric stares at Chuck for a moment not believing what he just heard. "Serena? My sister?"
Chuck nods.
"Wait, that means the guy you like is, Dan?"
"That's right," Chuck replies.
"Well, that actually changes things," Eric says.
"What?"
"Look, Serena can be a pain, but she's still my sister and you're right, this would break her heart. Forget what I said, just throw it out the window. Make sure you really like Dan before you break up with Blair and before Dan breaks up with Serena. If my sister is going to get hurt, she should get hurt for the right reason, which would be her boyfriend and you actually having true feelings for each other. Don't let this be an experimental game that when you're finished Dan goes running back to Serena causing her unnecessary pain. You have to make sure your feelings are true first," Eric says.
"So you suggest I keep up this secret until I know for sure?"
Eric nods. "I know you cheated, but it's going to hurt them more if you cheat and then come crawling back," Eric says.
"Who knows, maybe they both would laugh it off if that happened," Chuck suggests.
"I know my sister. She would be humiliated, regardless of whether anyone else knew or not. Please, Chuck, figure it out first and then if you wind up not actually liking him you can tell Blair and Dan can tell Serena; then they might laugh it off."
"What if I just ask for a break from Blair?"
"That's too suspicious. You know Blair, she would probably ask a million questions and hire a private investigator after you," Eric says.
"Well, that's true," Chuck agrees.
"Look, I'll help you where I can, just please keep this a secret for a little while longer, for my sister's sake," Eric pleads.
Chuck nods in agreement.