THE JOURNAL CHAPTER TWO

I DON'T OWE CRIMINAL MINDS OR THE CHARACTERS

"You were my first my last. There shall never be another you. You are a lifetime you are my life"—Malika E. Nura

Washington D.C 1989

Hotch was standing by the window of what he once called his home, he and Haley had been talking for hours, and now he beginning to get a headache. They kept going around in circles and he just wanted this particular conversation to be over; his first instinct was to run, but that was not an option obviously. He wasn't even sure why he had agreed to come over and talk to Haley in the first place; he should have known it would turn out this ugly. But deep inside him, he felt guilty and he had managed to convince himself that he owed her that much.

Haley and he had broken up about six months ago; well technically Haley had ended the relationship. She said that he was too busy and his new job with the ambassador was taking up all of his time. They hardly had time to spend together and he was always working, either that, or he always dropped everything he was doing as soon the ambassador called. She was also furious because their plans to get married had been placed on hold again. This on itself, opened a hold new pandora box, as they have been dating since high school almost eight years ago and Haley was so eager to get married and start a family.

The truth was, he wasn't really sure he wanted to marry Haley anymore, things have changed over the course of eight years, he was no longer that naive teenager who was smitten with her beauty. Even though his short career, he had seen much, the cases he had worked as a lawyer and a prosecutor, had changed his life. He had a different idea of life and what a family should be like, and to be honest with himself Haley wasn't the kind of woman he pictured himself with. She was immature and selfish, she was constantly picking fights and she was incredibly self-centered. He slowly started pulling away from her and things just weren't the same anymore. This, of course, was something Haley became aware of almost immediately, and she started even demanding more of his attention

He was used to this kind of behavior by now, ever since they have started dating in high school, Haley had always been very demanding and possessive, and when things didn't go her way, she would end up the relationship, just to blackmail him into getting back together again a few weeks later. They had been playing this game for years, actually almost a decade now, and he was so sick of her and her attitude that he did not even care, she was the one who drove him away, to begin with, it was her fault this was over.

Actually, that wasn't entirely true, Hotch had been seeing someone else for the past few months, it wasn't like he had cheated on Haley of course. After their final break up, Hotch took some time off, to consider his life and what he really wanted. He knew perfectly well he did not want Haley on his life anymore. Of course, there was someone else already in his heart, but she had absolutely nothing to do with his history with Haley, or what led to their break-up.

Hotch had not even started dating Emily until he and Haley were officially over. The problem was that he had fallen madly in love with the brunette girl and there was nothing that he could do about it, after all, you couldn't choose who your heart loved.

"I just don't understand how could you do this?" Haley cried from the couch "After everything that we had been trough..."

"We broke up Haley" he reminded her annoyed

"You ended everything if I remember correctly, you said that I was no longer the man you wanted" how dare she to actually blame this on him.

"I was just mad Aaron" she defended sobbing

"I needed some time to think, but I was hoping we could fix everything...but no! you went ahead and decided to sleep around..." she stood up from the couch angrily pacing around the living room.

"I didn't sleep around," he said irritated "And if remember correctly you started seeing someone else too"

"That meant nothing" she cried "I love you, Aaron...you are the man I have always loved..." that was the problem with Haley that she did whatever she wanted and treated him however she wanted, and then, she said I love you and everything was supposed to be okay

"So that is why you went ahead and sleep with my best friend?" he fired angrily, he was so tired of Haley blaming him for everything. She didn't force him into his friend's arms, that was all her.

"And you slept with your boss's daughter..." she shouted "So we are even"

"That is not the same Haley," he said taking a deep breath, he wasn't going to let her get to him that easily "I was not cheating on you...we were already done..."

"You couldn't find someone else could you? She is just a stupid kid for God's sake!" The blonde woman said as she faced her ex, she was so mad she could not stop shaking.

"Emily has nothing to do with you and me, leave her out of this" he barked angrily

"How can I leave her out of this when she is the reason we that are here in the first place...?" the blonde woman asked as tears began to down her eyes. That stupid little girl had come and ruined everything for them.

"Haley you ended the relationship, we are done, what don't you understand about that?" he declared for what it felt like the hundredth time that night.

"What the hell is it with this girl anyway?" she asked with fire in her eyes "What in the fuck did she give you that are so infatuated with her? Sex cannot be that great given that she is only nineteen for crying out loud"

"I am not discussing my relationship with her, with you," he said firmly "I don't have to explain anything to you, we broke up and there is nothing else for us to talk..." he needed to control himself of did was going to end up badly. Sex had absolutely nothing to do with why he was in love with Emily.

"What would the ambassador say if she knew you were sleeping with her daughter?" Haley smirked evilly

"Are you threatening me?" he asked as his eyes darkened, damn her, and her stupid games, he wasn't going to fall for them this time.

"I am asking if her mother is okay with this so-called relationship? What about the FBI? Do they know that you sleep with your client's daughter ?" she fired venomously, he crossed the room in two strikes getting right in front of her face

"If you come any near her, I will destroy you..." he warned "I don't care if you tell her mother or the FBI, I love her and we are going to be together whether you like it or not..." he said furiously watching as Haley a few took a step back.

"You are going to regret this" Haley said furiously as she watched him walk away

"No I am not" he replied without turning to look at her, and truthfully he wasn't

Later that evening he was settled against the sofa of the luxury hotel, with Emily curled against his chest, they had gone out for dinner after he picked her up at Yale, they even walk around the park and feed the ducks. Now they were watching movies and enjoying time with each other. They usually didn't have a lot of time to spend together between his job and her classes, they hardly saw each other. That, and the fact that they were technically hiding their relationship from her mother, and well he wasn't really sure, how the ambassador would react to the news. Well, he did know, but he loved Emily and he was willing to do, whatever it took to be with her.

"How did your test go?" he asked pressing a kiss to the back of her neck, as they watched My Man Godfrey on the television.

"Good I think, I can't really remember, I was too busy thinking about you to care," she said flashing him a sexy smile, he laughed at her statement knowing she was just joking.

"Then I guess I should stop talking to you until you are done with finals" he teased

"No you won't," Emily said her mouth opening and slapping his chest indignantly, he started laughing and tickling her.

"Aaron stop..." she said laughing hysterically as he managed to flip them on the couch covering her body with his.

"I love you beautiful girl..." he said looking at her in adoration and kissing her lips

"I love you too Agent Hotchner..." she responded deepening the kiss and reaching out for the hem of his shirt as their kisses turned passionate.

"Baby wait..." Hotch said pulling away some, not really wanting them to go there yet.

"What is wrong," she asked confused

"Nothing...I have something for you..." he said sitting down again

"You do..." Emily sat up as well looking at him with confused eyes, he reached into his sweatpants pocket pulling out a small velvet box.

"What is it...?'" she asked smiling shyly at him

"Just open it, baby..." she did as he asked opening the box, inside there was a diamond gold necklace, with two hearts entwined together, it was very delicate and beautiful, it was expensive.

"Oh my god Aaron is beautiful"

"Is a promise necklace..." he stated taking the box from her hands,

"I would have gotten you the ring, but you said you don't like conventional things...so I just got this instead..." her eyes were full by the time he was done talking.

"Oh, Aaron this so beautiful" How in the hell did she get so lucky with a guy like him? When all of her friends were dating idiot college kids. Yet here she was dating this amazing man, who was a federal agent, and he treated her better than anyone else had in her entire life.

"I love you so much you know that?" she said blinking the tears away

"I love you too baby," he said taking the delicate necklace and placing it around her neck, placing soft kisses across her neck.

"Now everywhere you go, you will have my heart with you as well," he said with a final kiss to her lips, as he watched the beautiful necklace rest against her collarbone.

They made love slowly that night and Hotch had never been so happy in his entire life, he lay awake for a while, after they went to sleep. Emily was sleeping against his chest, and he loved to watch her sleep, she was the most exquisite creature on earth. He still could not believe she was his, well she wasn't technically his yet, but she will be. He was convinced that he wanted to marry her and spend the rest of his life with her, one of this days he was going to gain the courage, and ask her to marry him, but first she had to finish school and he needed to find a job that could give her the lifestyle that she deserved. That wasn't gonna be easy of course, the ambassador still didn't know about them, and Haley was not going to leave him alone that easily, but he didn't care. He loved Emily more than he had loved anyone else before. It is not like he had intentionally planned this, it just happened. It all started when the ambassador asked him to directly supervise Emily and watch after her, pretty much be her bodyguard twenty-four-seven.

Things just kinda happened, they started spending a lot of time together and he quickly realized she wasn't the young troubled girl everyone thought she was. She was smart and beautiful and kind-hearted, and she was just the most amazing person he had ever met. Haley and he were already done when he came to realize he was in love with the young girl, and one day Emily went on a trip around Europe and the ambassador demanded that he must go with her. They spend a month traveling around Europe and things kind of just happened from there, they felt in love with each other and there was nothing he could do about that.

Of course, there would be consequences about that later, but they had already discussed that and they did not care. They loved each other deeply and they were willing to fight whoever got on their way. Hotch was willing to find a job somewhere else and marry her no matter what the ambassador said, and well Emily didn't care is she had to resign to everything she had, her family, their money, the Prentiss name, she was gonna be with him regardless of what the entire world said.

"I can't promise you forever, because that's not long enough. - Jason Dorsey"― Jasinda Wilder