Omgomgomg chapter 2 guys!! How exciting!! AI was crying writing this chapter so be prepared haha

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Still dont own bones :(

Chapter 2.

He kept that picture on his fridge. We were so happy here, and god that night! His lips on my neck made my body burst into flames. My eyes traveled over a picture of pops and him, a picture of the whole team and then a picture of a boy with blond curly hair came into view. "parker! Oh no.."

His sweet face looked back up at me, I was with booth when he took that photo. It was a wonderful summers day and we had a picnic in the park, Parker had gotten ice cream on his nose and cheek, Booth noticed and had to take a photo. I'm glad he did, it's a wonderful photo.

I quickly checked the clock over the bar table in the kitchen. It was 2 am. I couldn't call Rebecca now, what would I even say? "Hi its Tempe, Booth died saving me from a crazy stalker"? What do you even say to a child who lost their dad? I mean no one cared about me when my parents disappeared, they just threw me in the foster system and that was that.

I'll call Rebecca in the morning, after some sleep maybe I would know what to say. It broke my heart that I would have to hear sweet Parker cry over his father. He doesn't deserve that, He deserves a full life with both of his parents. But now he won't have that, because of me. The tears found my face again as I walked away from the kitchen and turned to face the living room.

There were late nights we sat there, laughing, drinking and talking. I scanned the room, my eyes stopped on the liquor cabinet. Yes. A drink. That is exactly what I need. I walked through the room and opened the cabinet slowly. I saw a few bottles, but one caught my eye. Hillrock 1806, his favorite. I lift up the bottle and scan it, the note that I had attached to it was still there.

Booth,

I knew you could do it

PS. Hope this tastes as good

in a glass as it did on your

Lips

I give this to him a week after the bar incident. He had closed a big rico case and I thought he deserved the best. He had talked about this whiskey for a while, it was the only drink he ordered beside beer. It tasted amazing in his lips, smokey and smooth. He hadn't bought it himself, because it cost too much. "Bones, you can't do this! It's a hundred bucks!" He had told me with wide eyes. I had just laughed, leaned in closer and said playfully "But if you share it with me it's okay, right?" I put a hand on his thigh. He softened his gaze and leaned in closer and kissed me on the cheek. "Of course I'll share it with you" He had whispered before leaning away. We were at the bar with the rest for rest of the night.

I took the bottle and a whiskey glass. My body softly landed on the couch and I put the bottle and glass in front of me on the table. I took off my jacket and shoes and sat more comfortably on the couch. The cork was easy to peel off, I poured up two fingers and lifted the glass to my lips and took a big sip. The liquor burned on its way down. The tears reached my lips and blended with the smokey whiskey. It didn't taste as sweet on its own.

The silence made its way to my ears again and it drove me insane. It made me cry even more, I wiped my tears away but new tears took their place. Then I remembered his radio. He has CDs, I could fill the void with the sound of his favorite songs. I emptied the glass and swallowed. "FUCK" I exclaimed as it burned on its way down. I stood up and walked over to his radio, okay, what does he have? Led Zeppelin, U2, Rascal Flatts.. I don't know any of these.. Oh, Keith Urban, I've heard Booth talking about him. He must be a favorite. I opened the cd and pressed play and turned up the volume. The music started as I made my way back to the couch. I picked up the comforter and laid it over me.

Alone in this house again tonightI got the TV on, the sound turned down and a bottle of wineThere's pictures of you and I on the walls around meThe way that it was and could have been surrounds meI'll never get over you walkin' away

His voice filled my ears and I broke down even harder, I held the comforter tighter around my body. We could have been so much more. We had built up so much during these weeks. I would never look into his eyes again, his golden brown eyes, soft like satin. He would never lay his arm around me again. I scanned the room through the tears that wanted to fall over my puffy cheeks. He had memories from his entire life on the walls, pictures of me and the gifts I had given him over the years. Even the tiny tiger I had given him after the Vegas case. "Tony the Tiger needs a tiger, don't you think?" I had said as I presented the tiger on my palm. He had laughed "Yeah, Bones, Tony needs a tiger, just a Bones needs a Jasper." His eyes had met mine and we sat there for a couple minutes before anyone said anything.

Why did he have to stand up? I would have happily taken that bullet. It was meant for me. I'm not leaving anyone behind. He is. His son- His son doesn't have a father anymore. I dont- I dont have- my Booth anymore. I wiped away some tears.

I've never been the kind to ever let my feelings showAnd I thought that bein' strong meant never losin' your self-controlBut I'm just drunk enough to let go of my painTo hell with my pride, let it fall like rainFrom my eyesTonight I want to cry

Im a rational person. I shouldn't be reacting like this. This is not me. I'm not a person who breaks down. I want to be able to breathe again. "Damn it Booth, what have you down to me?" I yelled out to the empty room in front of me. I took the bottle in my hand and brought it to my lips and drank straight from the bottle. "Im strong, I promise Booth- Im str-strong Im strong for you" I tried to take a deep breath but all I could do was cry. "LET me bre-athe!!" I choked out and cried even harder. "Plea-se co-me b-ack.." I drank some more to help ease away the pain. Even though the taste made me miss him even more. His mere presence would make my heart stop beating, I want his arms around me one more time.

Would it help if I turned a sad song on"All By Myself" would sure hit me hard now that you're goneOr maybe unfold some old yellow lost love lettersIt's gonna hurt bad before it gets betterBut I'll never get over you by hidin' this way

I thought back to when hodgins and I were buried alive. The message I wrote to Booth. He would never know now. I should have told him. I closed my eyes and let my head fall back against the back of the couch. My love letter to him would never be read by another pair of eyes, the only pair I wanted to read the letter.

I really thought I was going to die that day, I never thought I would see the light of day again. I wrote to him so that when he found my body, He would know that I believed in him and that it wasn't his fault.

Dear Seeley,

I'm writing to you now because I don't know if I will ever see your handsome face again.

My heart goes out to you, and Angela. Even though she is not together with Dr.Hodgins I know her feelings are as bright as the sun shines. She told me once that when you love someone, like really love someone, you can't help but smile when they smile. I never thought I would feel like that with anyone. It's irrational to give yourself to someone forever.

I hope you don't cry, I hate seeing you cry. If my death brings sadness to your life, then I don't want to die. If my last breath makes you lose yours, then I want to breathe forever.

If I don't make it out of here alive I don't want you to blame yourself. I want you to know that I know that you did everything in your power to get me out of here, but the gravedigger was too powerful. That your strength guided me through the days that I was able to spend with you.

Tell Parker I've gone to visit the angels. Tell him that one day when you are strong enough, that you will go to the zoo and visit the dolphins. I'll be there, just wear your beautiful smile and you'll know I'm smiling back at you.

Know that my time with you changed me and made me a better person.

With all of my love,

Your Temperance

Ps. If you go to my office, in my bottom drawer in my desk, you will find that book you have been looking for. In that book I have left a daisy. Please keep it safe.

The letter was never seen by anyone, I still have it in my office, safe in one of my oldest books. It holds my heart. I lift my head and let it fall forward, as I did this the tears landed on my hands. I wish I had a letter from him, telling me that everything would be fine. That this feeling in my chest would go away one day. That one day when the sun sets in the south, that I finally will be able to breathe again. I let out a shaky breath and shook my head. My eyes caught sight of what I had been dreading this whole time. His bedroom. The place where he lays his head down and let slumber take over his body. Where he is the most vulnerable. I've seen him in there over a dozen of times. Vulnerable looked good on him. The morning sun on his relaxed face as his chest slowly expanded and deflated. His bare chest. His voice, his raspy morning voice "Temperance, what have I told you?"He chuckled. "Stop staring at me when I'm sleeping." I lowered my face in embarrassment. He lifted his arm and let me fall on his chest, he pulled me even closer and put both of his arms around me. He let out a happy sigh. "I mean I know I'm gorgeous but you have to let your beautiful eyes rest too" I giggled and snuggled closer to him and breathed in his scent.

I have to do it. I have to go in there. I can't drive home now. "I just have to rip of the tape" I threw the comforter to the side and stood up. I took quick steps towards the bedroom and then my feet wouldn't walk past the doorway. My body wouldn't move. I saw the bed. His dress shirt that was thrown on the bed, his pants folded beside it. Two t-shirts beside it. He wanted to look good, he had trouble picking what to wear. For me? He looked so good, his smile made him shine. He was so handsome last night.

I forced myself to walk through the bedroom to reach the bathroom. I hadn't seen my own face in hours. My hand reached out to find the light switch and the light hurt my eyes. I had to blink a few times. It hit me that I never turned on the lights In the rest of the apartment. It might have been for the best, I couldn't have faced it otherwise. I turned my back to the mirror and started to undress.

When I was completely undressed I got into the shower. The water hit my skin as I turned the knob. I didn't even react when the ice cold water hit my warm skin. It felt good to feel something other than heartache. When the water got warm I scrubbed my body clean and saw the blood run down the drain. I saw my hands clean again for the first time tonight. I turned the knob again to shut off the water and stepped out of the tub. I grabbed a towel of the rack and wrapped it around my body. I looked down at floor and saw my bloody clothes. I can't wear those and i'm not going to walk around naked. Never. I picked them up and went to put them in the washer.

As I returned to the bedroom I opened his top drawer where he keeps his T shirt. I grabbed the dark grey FBI t shirt that he always lets me borrow. I know that he wears it from time to time. I put my nose into the fabric and took a deep breath. If I closed my eyes it was like he was here. I could hear the light sniper trained feet walking around in the bedroom, tapping lightly to Keith Urban's sweet voice. I could hear him hum the lyrics as he walked around "I wanna sleep with you forever, and I wanna die in your arms" He had looked at me when he had showed me this song and sang them directly to me as his longing gaze held mine. "And I'm gonna love you.." My eyes had widened at this but held his gaze "like nobody loves you" He smiled and closed his eyes and swayed to the song. "All you need in life, Bones. Is love, music and a dance" He reached out his hand and said "and sometimes it all happens at once" I took his hand that night and we danced to the radio slowly. This was before the bar had opened.

I opened my eyes and threw the towel over a chair beside me and put on the shirt. It felt soft against my newly washed skin. I had used his shower gel to scrub my body clean. I only smelled like Booth now. My scent had disappeared in the shower. I walked over to the bed and picked up his dress shirt. I put it to my face a felt it kiss my skin with feather light kisses. The type of kisses Booth gave me when he just couldn't get enough of me, he held my cheeks in his hands and kissed my eyelids, nose, forehead and mouth. Everytime he leaned back he would look me in the eyes and happily sigh and say "You're mine" maybe I was his girlfriend? Was I?

"No one else can have you" He would say and start kissing my neck. "You hear that?" I would giggle and tease him. "No, didn't hear you, what did you say?" I said through my giggles. "God, Temperance Brennan giggling. It is the sweetest thing that has ever graced this earth" As he said this he wrapped his arms around my waist with my arms tucked in between us. "I'm serious, I don't want to share you. It's like a good apple pie. I want to show everyone that I can make you giggle like a little school girl" He kissed my neck one more time and stopped by my ear and whispered. "But I don't want anyone else to hear it."

I let my tears fall against the fabric in my hands and I let the shirt fall onto the armchair beside the bed. I put his other clothes beside the shirt and lifted the duvet and got into bed. I slowly rolled over to what I know is his side of the bed, I put my head where he would his head and I let sleep take me away.

The sun graced my face with its featherlight touches of dawn. I slowly opened my eyes and realised that I wasn't in my own bedroom, I blinked a few times. "Booths, I'm at Booths." Without turning around I reached out over the bed "Booth, baby" I murmured. I felt that the space beside me was cold. He didn't make it to bed last night? " Booth? Are you on the couch?" I said a little bit louder but I still didn't get a response. I furrowed my eyebrows and sat up. Why wasn't he answering? I looked around. "Oh no.." Everything from yesterday came back. "Oh no, no, no, no" I got out of bed, ran out to the living room and saw the Hillrock bottle sitting on the table with the glass beside it. I saw my jacket laying on the couch. "Oh no, Seeley baby.."

Then everything else came back to me. I had yelled at angela and the others when we were at the hospital, that's why I was alone when I got the news. They don't know, and they don't know about me and booth. It should stay that way. I have to call them, I have to apologize. I scanned the room for my bag and found it by the door. I ran over and went through it quickly and found my phone. I took it, dropped my bag and went back to the bed. The tears had started to fall down my cheeks again.

I unlocked my phone once I was sitting on the bed. 5 missed calls. All from Angela. No voice mails. I pressed her name and put the phone to my ear. What would I even say? Before I could even think another word she picked up. "Sweetie!" Her voice was as clear as day. "Sweetie, we were so worried!!" I could hear that in her voice. I still couldn't talk, my vocie wouldnt let me. "Sweetie have you heard anything from the doctors, how is he? Can we visit him today? Was the surgery long?" All of her questions made my throat close up.

"Angela.." I got out in a whimper. "He- He uhm- He-" The words got caught in my throat. "He- he uhm- He didn't make it." I broke down again and felt the tears land in the palm of my hand. "Sweetie.." Her voice dropped lower, sadness took over. "He didn't make it?"

I just sat there with the phone against my ear for a while as I let myself cry. "No, uhm he didn't." I got out. "And Angela- Uhm- I'm sorry for yelling at you guys, I just didn't know what to do, the doctors didn't say anything and you were asking questions and you know how I am and I-" I lost myself in a rambling mess "SWEETIE!" I snapped out of it. "Don't apologize, we get it, we all get it. Your partner and best friend was shot. When that happens you get an excuse to yell at your friends." I just sighed, she understood.

"I-I just wanted to let you guys know, could you tell cam that I will be out of the office for a couple of days? I can't be there.." I could hear how she nodded. "Yeah of course, she will understand, get some rest sweetie, let yourself cry okay?" I wiped away some tears at this, we said our goodbyes and we hung up. I lowered the phone and I just stared

at it for a short while.

I scrolled through my contacts and found her name. My hand wouldn't let me press her name. I let a tear land on the screen. I can do this, I have to do this for parker. I pressed her name and put the phone to my ear and heard how the signals disrupted the silence in the apartment. "Tempe, Hi! Is everything okay?" Her happy tone made my heart break, as Booth would say. "Tempe?" she asked again.

"Rebecca, hey- uhm Hi!" I took a deep breath. "I have to tell you something.." I said softly as new tears found my eyes.

Omg PLEASE tell me what you think!! Whats gonna happen next?? Is Booth actually dead??