Ch. 2

"Alright….So who do we have?" Asked a slightly dazed Houji.

"Apparently the BTT" Answered Jacob while calmly sipping his earl grey.

"HOLY MERDA(1)!" exclaimed a certain surprised mafioso.

Jacob opened the first manual while Houji went to his swearing corner to cuss about everything in existence.

"Ahem, alright lads, listen up: ANTONIO FERNANDEZ CARRIEDO: User Guide and Manual, oh sweet, they have clothes, no extra shopping trips. Hmmm, Holy Moly! They can work? Amazing! Apparently there are a few options as to how you wake him up." said Jacob, who backed up and gave the manual to Serena.

"So we can cook Spanish or Mexican food, have other units yell at him, or we can drop-kick a tomato. I'm up for some enchiladas, whaddya say Houji?" said Serena, which made Houji peek out from his cussing corner.

"Well, enchiladas it is, I guess." Said Jacob in an ecstatic tone. "I'll start making it now while you two wake up the others."

"Da, comrade, an" answered Houji.

"GILBERT BEILSCHMIDT: User Guide and Manual, 5 foot 9? Aww man, he's 2 centimetres taller than me. Anyways…. Pouring beer on the lid? Nope, we're not legal yet. Apple strudel? Jake's already making enchiladas. Speaking Russian? Oh, I could do that! I'm half Russian," said Houji.

"Ahem….привет товарищ Гилберт, рад видеть вас снова(2)" said a mischievous Houji.

The box started shaking violently and Serena was then able to open it with a knife that she produced out of thin air. Suddenly, an albino man popped out and started shouting.

"WAHHHHHHHH! BRUDER SAVE ME! IT'S THE UNAWESOME RUSSIAN- wait, you're not Ivan ...but you're a mächen(3)...HOLY SCHEISSE(4) IS THAT A F*CKING KNIFE"

"Gilbert please calm down." said an annoyed Houji (who misses his cussing corner) with bleeding ears due to all the screaming. A yellow bird, a.k.a Gilbird suddenly flew out of the box and landed on Gilbert's head. Due to all the chaos that happened within these 5 minutes, the last box "spoke" with a very heavy French accent.

"Excuse moi, iz anyone 'ere? Gilbert mon ami, I thought I heard you."

"Uhhhh, yeah…. Serena, help him out."

"Fine," said Serena as she flipped her knife in her hands (which earned a small shriek from Gilbert) and headed to the last crate, which (if you haven't guessed yet) Francis was trapped in. She helped him out and Houji emitted his Russian aura before Francis tried anything funny. By now, the sauce started simmering already and finally, the Spaniard awoke because of the heavy scent. Serena repeated the process of helping the units out of the wooden crate/box, which made the onlookers shiver as she handled the knife.

"Hola amigos, haven't seen you in a while. By the way, who's the boy and the chica(5) over here?" asked Antonio, who (fortunately) hadn't noticed the knife in Serena's hands yet.

"Alright, introductions!" announced a beaming Serena, yes a beaming girl with a knife in her hands.

"I am Houji, Houji Ivanov. Russo-Chinese. I can speak Japanese, Russian, English, a bit of Chinese, and some French from school because we're in Canada. That girl over there is Serena Florentino. Spanish-Italian," at this Antonio peeked up."Don't mess with her, her dad's a mafia executive, and I'm positive that she is one as well-" by now the BTT were white as sheets.

"NEVER assume," said Serena

"Well, you're the one commenting on how to correctly kill a man, and you have a F*CKING mafia hat collection!"

"THOSE ARE CALLED FEDORAS, YOU STRONZO(6)" yelled Serena in a surprisingly sweet voice.

"Quiet down, children, don't swear," stated Jacob calmly from the kitchen.

"Whozzat?" asked a confused Prussian.

"Fiiiiine, 'mom'. Anyway, that's Jacob Bélanger, Anglo-French. He's a really good chef, by really good, I mean 3-Michelin-star-good." Francis was amused by this information "And you should go meet him in the ki-" Before Houji even finished that sentence, Gilbert had already tackle-hugged Jacob in the kitchen, with Gilbird tweeting around in circles.

"WOW ANOZHER ALBINO! YOU LOOK LIKE ZHE EMO VERSION OF ZHE AWESOME ME!" Jacob was getting annoyed by the sheer amount of people that had called him emo because of his hair covering one eye

"I WILL OFFICIALLY ADOPT YOU AZ MY AWESOME LIL BRO!" declared an excited Prussian. Poor Jacob, who was still comprehending all this information sat dumbfounded on the ground.

"Don't you need legal documents for that?" asked a still dazed Jake.

"NEIN, you don't need that because of my awesomeness." Answered a smirking Gilbert.

"Bu-"

"NO BUTS, YOU'RE MY BRUDER AND THAT'S FINAL!"

"Uhhhhhh…. Ok...then"

Jacob was still comprehending this fact the entire morning while topping the tortillas for the enchiladas.

"Hola amigo, this smells amazing. When will it be done?" Asked Antonio.

"In about 25 minutes. Let the other 2 show you around the house first," answered Jake who just noticed that all the units are awake.

"Alright~" replied Serena.

They went around the mansion with the BTT in tow, marvelling at everything they see.

"ZEY HAVE A SWIMMING POOL! OOH JACUZZIS, ZATS AWESOME!"

"Mon Dieu, how do you afford all this?"

"As I said, Serena's father is a mafia executive, which explains the richness."

Serena sighed and shot a look at Houji which made him shiver.

"A-anyways, why d-do you guys l-live in the same house?" asked Antonio who somehow got affected by the "look".

"Well, me and Jacob's parents both work under Serena's dad. Not exactly as mafiosos," he sighed, "it's hard to explain."

"Si, this is interesting, my Lovi is also in the mafia (UwU)~"

"Zats some beautiful landscape out zere." Stated Francis who was gazing outside at the surrounding beaches and hills.

"Thank you" responded Serena with a somewhat sadistic looking smile.

"By ze way, 'ow old are you guys?"

"14, all except for Serena."

"HEY! It's only ONE month till I'm 14!"

"One month is still a f*cking long time."

"Hmph."

They conversed "peacefully" - with occasional arguments where Houji and Serena were cussing each other out- for the rest of the time until Jacob announced that brunch was ready.

"I made 12 servings of enchilada and churros!" said Jake cheerfully

"Wait, why 12? There are only 6 people." Asked a confused Spaniard.

"Because, Houji is an endless black hole who will suck up any food put before him, with the exception of Cheetos, carrots, and eggplants," he responded

"Cheetos are perfectly fine," stated Serena with a poker face.

"HOW CAN YOU EAT THAT SH*T! THEY ARE F*CKING DISGUSTING. THEY ARE MUTATED CHEESE FLAVOURED CARROTS! THEY F*CKING FLOAT IN WATER!" screeched a furious Houji.

"Wanna fight?" Serena replied,(somehow) sweetly

"Now, stop the cussing. Serena, table cleanup for dinner. Houji, laundry and cleaning this Saturday." stated Jacob in a stern but motherly voice while both kids groaned and replied with "Ok 'mom'."

"SEE HOW MY AWESOME LIL BRO DEALS WITH HIS UNAWESOME FRIENDS?"

"Take that back before you get a knife shoved down your throat-" said Jacob as Serena was polishing her knife "-well, too late. Serena, don't get physical." This made Gilbert hide behind Jacob while peeing his pants.

"Fine, 'mom'." Huffed Serena, who looked like a 5-year old who was denied candy access.

The group started eating their "awesome" meal, as Gilbert called it. All was silent except for the clinking of utensils until a certain Prussian smirked mischievously.

"FOOD FIGHT!" he announced, and Houji immediately sprang into action.

Just conjure a mental image of what is happening: Tortillas flying everywhere (ofc), the cheesy toppings were smeared over Gilbert and Houji's cheeks, similar to warpaint - the enchiladas were gone in record time. Well, Gilbert and Houji were the ones who were actively participating. Jake and Francis were sobbing over the wasted Spanish food, Antonio seems oblivious to his surroundings even though that it's SPANISH food that's being wasted, the Spaniard and Serena quietly fled to the porch like shadows without anyone noticing and started conversing with a group of passing ants. Jacob finally had enough of this chaos and used his ultra motherly voice. "ENOUGH. Serena, you are excused from dinner cleanup. Gilbert, Houji, you will be responsible for all the chores for 2 months starting from now."

"Awww, but you're my awesome bruder-"

"NO COMPLAINTS, now get to work."

All the other units and humans were too stunned to object or say anything. All except for Houji and Gilbert followed after Serena to the living room to watch Assassination Classroom season 2.

~1.5hour time skip brought to you by crystle pro99~

"PHEW, that was a lot of cleaning up! My little bro acts just like West!"

"Well, I watched the anime and Germany does seem like a germaphobe, just like moma Jacob….WAIT, Jake looks like you but acts like Ludwig, does this mean….." Houji's eyes widened.

" BLIMEY, don't get any ideas. PLEASE." said a flushed Jacob.

"Wow, you sounded just like Angleterre right there, ohonhonhonhon~"

"Well, he IS half British and half French….GASP!" she then stopped and whispered, "FRUK."

Houji then activated the other 90 percent of his IQ (which is A LOT) and said, "I'm Russo-Chinese=Rochu, Serena is a Spamano child, she even acts like both, and Jake's a Fruk child…..mostly acts like England though…."

Jacob then intercepted Houji's fanboying and said,

"Uh, I think...we should establish some ground rules in this house, since now that there are 6 of us, with who-knows-how-many-more to come." This got everyone's attention.

"Rule numero un," stated Jacob in French, " No killing, and yes Serena, I'm looking at you."

Serena responded with puppy-dog eyes but Jacob knew better than to look.

"Deux (2 in French), no sneaking food from the fridge in the middle of the night, I need them for cooking." Antonio and Gilbert seemed somewhat disappointed, even Gilbird started to protest by pecking Jake's foot, which he ignored, but Houji just stared at Jacob with a 'whaddya mean?' face, and then stole Serena's puppy-dog eye technique, which Jacob gave in to (because he looked).

"Fine, you can have extra food if you do chores, voluntarily." Houji was not completely satisfied but did a fist-pump anyways.

"Also, just a quick note, I realized that your unit clothes might not be what normal people wear, even though you all have multiple outfits…" the BTT each stared at their own military uniforms, "So, we're going shopping this afternoon…" he cheered and smirked a somewhat Serena-like grin, "with Houji's allowance."

Houji then returns his cussing corner to swear.

"And because we have mercy, Serena and Francis, you guys can't buy outrageously expensive knives, clothing (mainly hats for Serena), and beauty products (for the latter) just because you're Italian/French." Francis and Serena sighed, with the latter mumbling

"Does everyone forget that I'm also Spanish…"

"No, amiga, I do." said Antonio with a smile, which Serena gratefully returned (but with a more sadistic looking one).

"Ahem, rule numero trois: Because we don't want to cause any complications in and out of public, we will use human names for the units, understand?" Everyone nodded.

"Numero quatre, because this house has housemates that are under 16, please keep things appropriate for us," he shot a nervous glance at Francis before continuing, "Also, I read all of your manuals…..there isn't much I can do for Francis's 'needs'."

"And I will personally do illegal actions if you harm a single hair on Serena's head (a.k.a blackmailing the heck out multiple of your accounts)" Houji added

"…. but you guys should have IDs for alcohol and driving, right?" The BTT (including a terrified Francis) nodded

"Alright then, I think it'll be convenient for us to have a car-"

"I'll pay, besides, we already use your money for a lot of things." interrupted Serena. Jacob gave a 'see-how-nice-she-is' glare to Houji, which earned him a 'suit-yourself' glare back. Then he continued.

"And as of Gilbert's alcohol problem, we have an ancient mini-fridge in the attic, and we could pick up some beer after the shopping trip."

"See how awesome bruder is?" commented the happy Prussian.

"Enough said, why don't you pick your rooms." said Serena, "I personally recommend Gilbert to room with Jacob for now because we might need room for future housemates." Gilbert responded first with a series of 'woohoo's' and fist-pumps, and Jacob agreed grudgingly. When the BTT started moving their things - which were packed in convenient packages-, Houji and Jake were still glancing at Francis because the first was an overprotective boomer (cuz he's the oldest) and the latter because he's an overprotective mother. The boys started lecturing Serena, but all they got from her was an "Ok boomers."

(1)Sh*t in Italian

(2)Hello comrade Gilbert, nice to see you again: in Russian

(3)Girl in german

(4)Sh*t in german

(5)Girl in Spanish

(6)Arsehole in Italian

Special thanks to crystal 99 and mouthwassh for beta-ing this for me, UwU

Jacob and Houji are also based on them. They give pretty good and, uh, interesting ideas.

Sorry if the last chapter had no page breaks and stuff, I was kinda rushing it and this is also my first fanfic…so yea...UwU

PLEASE review, I need more feedback to make things better. My "friends" *coughcough* has already picked the next units that are coming, you could also have suggestions, 2p!, 1p! and chibi are all accepted, special ones like pirate!england and gaul!france are also alright.

SEEYA PEEPS