I woke with a start, every vessel of my heart pounding as I jerked up in bed. I wasn't sure why. The room was silent, uncomfortably so. As far as I could tell I had slept soundly and was out like a light the moment I hit the mattress. After I got home late from…

And then it hit me. I remembered what I did last night. Thinking about it felt like trying to remember a dream. I only remember what stuck out, none of the finer details of the event, but I had a feeling something important happened too. Something I couldn't quit bring to memory, and probably couldn't no matter how long I thought of it, but I'd try to remember anyway. It seemed important. I got into the house somehow, then it was just me and Tobias, then we were in the kitchen, he brought up Penny, and then it was all over. Once I got home, I snapped back to reality, once Mom had found me coming into the house. My memories become more vivid after that, once she asked me what I'd been doing out so late.

"Oh, I was just out with some friends." I lied, "My phone died and I guess I forgot to tell you. Sorry."

She bought it, or she was too tired to question me any further. I went straight up to bed. Then nothing, and then here I was in my empty room. Darwin was already up, I heard the showerhead running the next room over. No chance of getting in there for at least another half-hour. In the meantime, I was drawn out of my bunk by the smell of overcooked bacon hanging in the air. I rushed downstairs in a hurry to get a bite of what was cooking.

Once I got downstairs, my plate was already waiting for me on the table: bacon and toast. Simple, yet so inviting. We were out of butter, but it was a good day when dad could get up and make breakfast for us, so it didn't matter. I took my seat and started wolfing down my food, as mom came downstairs in her work clothes.

"There's our little nightowl." She said towards me.

I froze up in my seat, "Uh, sorry again Mom."

"Just make sure your father or I know where you are next time," she walked into the kitchen and joined dad by the stove, "we were scared to death worried about you."

"Your mother's right, Gumball." Dad said to me, "And consider yourself lucky. At your age, if I was late, my mother would have me jog around the house for every second I was late ten times over."

The three of us laughed, unsure if Dad was joking or not, but it didn't sound too unlikely given Granny JoJo. Mom could be a lot worse, but she didn't seem all that mad this morning. It was rare she was in this good of mood.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Anais came rushing down the stairs and hopped over the couch, nabbing the remote as fast as she could to turn on the TV. Before she could get Daisy the Donkey on the screen – I can't believe she still watches that at her age – Mom managed to pry the remote from her hands.

"Nuh uh uh," she said, "We get ready for school before TV time, remember?"

"But there's a special on right now! Daisy goes into the future and meets her older, evil self!"

"And you're going to miss all of it if you don't get ready soon."

Anais pouted, and pounded up the stairs. The door to the bathroom slammed open and shut, with a yell from a confused Darwin inbetween. If there's one thing I can say about my sister, she won't let anyone get in her way. Especially when it comes to silly kid's cartoons.

When Anais turned on the TV, the news immediately came on, which meant Mom was probably watching it late last night hoping I wouldn't be there. That's almost the only time she watches the news: when she's worried about us but can't do anything else. One of these days, she's going to wise up and put trackers on all of us. I wouldn't blame her. I worry myself too sometimes.

Darwin had just made it downstairs when I swiped one of his strips of bacon off his plate after finishing my own, unseen in my actions. He certainly looked like he only took half a shower. Somehow, he managed to only wet one side of his hair, and there were still some suds in it. I knew he had a rigorous shower routine but, Jesus.

"Hell yeah!" he said, eyeing his plate, "Breakfast!"

"Darwin!" Mom and Dad scolded him.

"Sorry Mrs. Mom! Sorry Mr. Dad! I just got excited. I didn't mean to swear."

Thirteen years later, he's still calling them that. Some things never change. Mom and Dad never liked being called Mr. and Mrs. by Darwin, but over the years they'd gotten used to it. Whatever your kid calls you, I guess as long as they say it with love.

Just as Darwin sat down to start his breakfast, one of the reporters on the television was interrupted with a "breaking headline," as another reporter appeared on the screen in front of a nice-looking house.

"I come to you live from the Rainbow River neighborhood where, early this morning, the body of young Tobias Wilson was found face down in the kitchen of the Wilson residence."

I nearly spat out Darwin's food. How could I forget about last night TWICE? Mom's eyes grew in horror as the reporter continued with the story and the camera faded into a shot just outside of Tobias' kitchen, the doorway to which was covered in police tape and a few officers looking down at the floor out of shot.

"The body was found by Wilson's parents just a few hours ago after returning home from a get-together with some friends. The couple immediately called the authorities, who arrived and began their investigation."

"Woah, Tobias is dead?" Darwin asked, "We go to school with him!"

I shooshed Darwin, knowing he'd only make Mom worry more by association. She didn't respond however, only cup the palm of her hand over her mouth.

"As of yet, no suspect or clear motive has been found, but the murder in question is undeniably homicide, according to investigators on the scene. With me right now is Sheriff Doughnut, who has been on the forefront of this tragic event."

"Thank you, and yes," said Sheriff Donut, "right now it is unclear who did the killing and why they did it." In the background, you could faintly hear a woman sobbing as the Sheriff spoke, "There's no evidence to suggest anything was stolen, but we do know how the perpetrator got in."

The camera went to a shot of the doors on the side of the house, the ones that lead into the basement. Both handles to the door were missing. Suddenly, my hoodie pocket seemed a lot heavier than before, and I panicked thinking I left the gun in there. I reached in, and my hand found something much worse: the missing handles and lock to that door. Goosebumps formed all over my body, and the Sheriff continued explaining the situation.

"The family usually keeps these doors shut with a lock, on account of the lock on the door at the bottom of the stairs being broken. According to a few neighbors we've been gathering information from, many houses installed here come with these doors. While there's little threat to keeping them unlocked, since there's still another door with a lock between the house and outside, it seems that wasn't the case last night."

"So, the murderer ripped the handles off of the doors to get in, and took them with them to get rid of any fingerprints they might have left behind?"

"Yes, that seems to be the case, and none have been as of yet either, or any other evidence for that matter. Let it be noted that we did discover the fingerprints of Mr. Wilson on the door at the bottom of these stairs. When the parents arrived home at around Six this morning, they noticed these doors propped wide open. Fearing a burglar had indeed broke in through these very doors, the two entered the house believing it would be safest to follow them from behind and may have rubbed off any prints left by the killer, who had already left the scene of the crime."

"How tragic that the family may have impeded the investigation. Now, can you tell us about the knife found by the body?"

"Certainly. It seems that the victim tried to defend himself…"

The news story continued. By now, Dad had joined Mom on the couch to watch the story unfold. Darwin listened intently by my side, ignoring his breakfast. Anais came down the stairs, completely ready for school.

"Ok, I'm ready." She said, "Can I watch Daisy the Donkey now?"

"Not now, honey." Mom said without looking away from the screen, "Something else popped up."

She huffed in frustration and made her way back up the stairs louder than before. It was probably better she didn't find out what was happening right now, the news had the tendency to be a little… insensitive. Sheriff Donut wasn't the best at giving reports gently.

As the Sheriff went into detail on the trail of blood from Tobias' room to the kitchen, Mrs. Wilson nearly drowning him out at this point, my leg started to feel sore. I looked down and saw the cut in my jeans, and the gash the knife Tobias had dropped made in me. Blood stained the black denim a darker shade. It wasn't as incriminating as the handles and lock in my pocket, but I didn't want to have to explain how I got cut the same night one of the kids who goes to my school got killed.

"I'm gonna finish getting ready." I said to everyone, excusing myself from the table. No one said a word or pulled their eyes from the screen as I made my way up the stairs, almost busting down the door as I rushed to hide the handles, the cut, and… Oh, God. Where did I put gun?

A small glint from the edge of my sheets caught my eyes, and sure enough, there was the pistol. God, I was beyond lucky not being caught already. If not by the authorities, by my family. It seemed like it would be a lot worse if I was around when they found out.

I rushed to to hide the evidence. There was a loose floorboard only I knew about under my bed, where I usually hid snacks and cash no one else could get their hands on. I dropped the gun and the door handles with the lock attached underneath and put the floorboard back. I pulled myself out from under my bed, only to find Anais standing over me.

"What are you doing?" she asked me with her arms crossed.

"What are you doing in my room?!" We'd had separate rooms for almost a year now, but she always made a habit of coming back.

She got on all fours and looked under the bed, carefully scanning the entire underside, before she eyed something and scurried underneath. I started sweating bullets as she scurried back out, holding a magazine. She eyed it carefully as I cringed realizing what she found.

"What's… Elmore Exclusive?"

I took the magazine from her, ripping the woman in the bikini on the cover a bit, "None of your business!" I screamed, a bit too loudly.

"Is this one of those things Mom said you needed, 'private time' for?"

"Get out!"

She finally left, a bit annoyed, and I closed the door behind her. I threw the magazine back under the bed and ripped off my jeans, almost reopening the untreated cut. I figured I probably needed to throw them out before Mom or Dad saw them like this. I buried them under my blankets to dispose of later. I paced around the room a bit, letting everything run in my head to make absolutely sure I wasn't forgetting anything. I decided there shouldn't be anything else I had to hide, and I rushed into the bathroom for a shower.

As the lukewarm water fell on me from the showerhead, I thought about what would happen next. The police were sure to find something to connect me to the crime. I've seen crime shows. If it wasn't a fingerprint, it would be a blood sample I left at the scene of the crime. Or a hair. Or they could identify me by the tracks my shoes left in the carpet. Or a witness who saw me run out of the house next door would identify me. Or, or…

Mom knocked on the door, and I was pulled back into reality. How long had I been in here?

"Honey, it's almost time to go. You'd better get out soon or you'll miss the bus."

Relief fell all over my body. For a moment, I panicked and thought she had somehow found all the evidence I hid.

"Ok, I'll be out soon Mom."

"Be careful today, come right back home after school."

"Ok."

"I know you like to hang out with your friends and get a ride from one of them, but not tonight, ok?"

"Ok, I will."

"And maybe not for a while, until this entire mess is sorted out."

"I got it Mom, I'll come right back home."

She didn't respond, and I turned the shower off. I hadn't washed up at all, but I didn't think I needed a shower too bad. The water was frigid at this point anyway. I dried myself off, careful not to open the knife wound or get blood on the white towel, and I grabbed the roll of gauze and bandages we keep underneath the sink. With the wound covered up, I wrapped the towel around my waist, and went back in my room to get dressed.

Whatever happens, just try to get through the rest of the day in one piece, I thought to myself. I imagined what everyone at school would be talking about what happened, they'd probably announce it over the intercom and ask for a moment of silence.

I got dressed and met Darwin at the door, Mom was taking Anais to private school this morning. We left and walked to our bus stop without saying a word to each other. Darwin didn't seem too bummed out to hear about Tobias' death, but he was still a bit off after hearing the news. As we waited for the bus, which is almost always exactly seven minutes late, he perched his head perched up.

"Do you think he deserved it, Gumball?"

The question caught me off guard, and it took me a little bit to respond, "Uh, Tobias? I don't know, maybe. He wasn't really a good guy at all."

"Yeah, but we're not so good either, right?"

I thought back to a week or two ago, Darwin and I were at TDM Gas. Both of use were a little low on cash, but we managed to grab a couple burritos for the road before the cashier, Larry, could notice. This wasn't the first time we'd shoplifted, but we didn't do it compulsively. Unlike Carrie or Masami now, "Right, but we never hurt anyone like Tobias did."

"You think that makes a difference?"

Darwin had learned a lot since he started living with us, but he still didn't quite grasp some concepts like moral subjectivity. Only recently had he accepted there were truly bad people in the world, but with that he struggled to figure out how justice was used against people who'd done wrong. And why some bad people – like Tobias before last night – never seemed to get in trouble for blatantly obvious shit. Whenever Darwin asked something touchy like this, I tried my best to give him the right answers, but I always felt like there was something I messed up in my long-winded lectures or that Darwin might get the wrong idea. And frankly, I was not prepared for the "Who Deserves to Die" conversation this morning.

"Well, the way I see it buddy," I said, making sure Darwin knew this was just my opinion, "Stealing food or clothes or a space on a wall for some art is a minor thing, and you should never be put in too much trouble for it. Unless it like, hurts someone else in an extreme way. Like if they NEEDED that food to survive. But if you hurt someone else intentionally, then you should punish that more depending how the severity or number of times they did it."

Darwin scratched his head, a little confused, "But when would someone know if taking food will hurt someone else? Or if someone needs that food as badly as the other person?"

"Um, I guess it's not always that simple and you need to work around those problems."

"And if someone has to kill someone else to punish them, then what makes that okay compared to what the other person did?"

"That's… a pretty loaded question, Darwin. My best guess is sometimes you just know."

"You do?" Darwin looked me right in the eyes. I could still see a fragment of his naïve nature in his, shadowed long ago by the reality of the world. He still looked so young for his age.

"Er, hypothetically you or I or someone else would have to. Who knows, maybe Tobias was just a victim to some random serial killer."

"Really?" He said, turning his head behind him, looking for a madman who wasn't there.

"Who knows."

"You don't think it was someone out for him? Someone we knew?"

I was about to answer, when the hiss of the school bus stopping in front of us caught us both off guard, making us both jump.

"Let's talk about this later," I said to Darwin, "The only thing I want to worry about right now is my math test at noon."

We got on the bus, and everyone on it was chatting it up to one another. All of them seemed to be talking about the news this morning.

"No, it really happened!" Carmen told Clare while Molly leaned over the backrest to join their conversation, "It's all over the news and everything."

"I heard Tobias hurt whoever killed him real bad." Clayton said to Joe, "The police just have to be on the lookout for someone covered in cuts. Or a body depending on how hard Tobias fought."

"I think his dad might have done it," Tina whispered to Ocho, "and now they're trying to cover it up as a break-in."

I lead Darwin down to the back of the bus, where it was mostly deserted. We sat in the back together, only catching a few our louder classmates and their wild theories. It was going to be a long day.

"Hey guys," a voice called out to us across from our seat. Darwin and I both jumped, until we saw it was only Carrie. Good lord, how did we not see her? She was way too good at seemingly appearing out of nowhere.

"Hey Carrie." Darwin and I said in unison.

"Did you hear about Tobias?"

"Yeah." Darwin responded, "We saw it on the news earlier today."

She nodded, "My mom woke me up and told me about it after she heard. She said I needed to learn about it 'gently.'"

"It's really messed up, right?"

"Fuck him."

Darwin looked at me, a little shocked, "Uh, that's a little harsh, don't you thin—"

"I was absolutely thrilled when my mom told me this morning, I had to contain my excitement, so I didn't look like a freak."

"But—"

"Darwin, do you know how bad someone has to be for your first reaction to hearing about their death to be joy? Whoever killed him did the world a favor."

I picked at the stuffing in one of the tears in the seat, half-comforted by what Carrie was saying. At least someone didn't think it was so bad. The "good" part of me scolded myself for thinking like that, but it was a little too late to change anything about it so I might as well convince myself I wasn't completely wrong.

The bus grinded to a halt again, the last stop of the morning. My heart jumped. I hadn't considered what Penny would say to me when she saw me. Would she know I did it? Would she think Tobias dying the day after what he did to her was just a coincidence? What would she think of me if she knew?

And while my mind raced with questions, they all stopped as soon as I saw her. She was walking down the aisle slowly, clutching her planner to her chest as she looked for me. We always spend the morning together on the bus.

I stood up in the back, just as the bus started moving again. I hit the wall and fell back into the seat, but Penny saw me and rushed to the back. Darwin groaned, and instinctively moved to the other seat with Carrie to make room for Penny.

"Gumball!" She sat next to me. I rubbed the bruise that was forming on the back of my head.

"I'm fine," I said, "This bus is so old, it's starting to go soft."

She smiled, but it was short lived. She curled in the seat and leaned on me, without saying anything. Darwin and Carrie both looked out their window, and the chatter on Tobias' death had died down. After a few minutes, it started to the sky started to sprinkle. The rest of the bus drive, I held on to Penny as the tiny drops struck the roof of the bus. On any other day, this would have been great. Fighting the cold with Penny at my side. But without saying a word, Penny told me just what I was afraid of: she knew.