Part 2: Genin Team Eight
In a forest at the edge of The Hidden Leaf Village.
"Mizuki-sensei!" Naruto calls out into the darkness. But no-one responds.
He is in a small clearing, with a house of sorts situated in the middle of it. What was strange however, was that there are two Naruto's standing there, waiting for someone who quite clearly wasn't going to arrive.
A voice sounds from behind him, coming from the second Naruto, "Damnit! Mizuki left already, I even managed to learn the stupid Jutsu. Stupid scroll, stupid Senken…"
"How do I get rid of you clones?" the first Naruto questions the second, clearly annoyed about his spotlight being stolen.
"How should I know? We're both me, besides, you're the clone."
"No I'm not!"
"Yes you are!"
"Am I?"
"No, you both are." Says a new Naruto that just walked into the clearing, "Now hurry up and disappear."
"Sorry hotshot, we haven't worked out how to do that."
"But you're clones, surely you know how to get rid of yourselves."
"How do you know you're not the clone?"
"Uhh… Of course I'd know if I was a clone."
"But we're each other, you know what we know, and for all we know you're the clone."
"Don't call me a clone, stupid clone."
"I'm not stupid, you're stupid."
"No I'm not!"
"Well if you're so smart tell us how to get rid of us!"
"But I'm the real one."
"Yeah? Why don't you go disappear like a good little clone."
"Don't call me little!"
A fourth and fifth Naruto walk into the clearing, "Huh? More clones, great."
"Hey you two, tell these fakes that I'm the real one."
"But I'm the real one!"
"No you're not."
"I am!"
The first Naruto shouts into the air, "PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!"
Surprisingly, a non-Naruto voice answers, "The clones simply have to want themselves to disappear."
"Yeah but I'm not the clone! Wait, who are you?" The second Naruto asks, taking stock of the newcomer.
He is dressed in standard ANBU stealth gear, with a short scruff of brown hair sticking behind his mask, which is themed like a falcon, which is easily distinguishable from every other type of bird due to its plumage.
"I am one of the shinobi tasked with finding the thief of that scroll." All four of Naruto's clones vanish as a twig hits each of them in the chest at an alarming speed, "Now will you come quietly, or do I have to use force?"
Naruto cracks under the threat, "I'll come quietly!" he blurts out, putting his hands in the air.
The ANBU drops from the tree and picks up Naruto and the scroll in one fluid motion. He runs in the direction of the Hokage tower.
Seemingly for no reason, he jumps high into the air.
A loud hiss escapes the ANBU's boots, as billows upon billows of white mist is ejected at high speeds from them. The shinobi's speed quadruples, but then the gas comes from his back and shoulders as well. He is nothing short of a blur, crossing the town in less than a minute. Naruto's screams never left his mouth, the shinobi had his sleeve jammed inside it.
He stops just at the entrance to the tower, and two ANBU shinobi drop down next to him. They are wearing similar attire to his, but their masks depict different animals, an eagle and a sparrow, which are also very distinct from every other type of bird.
"You found the target." Sparrow comments at their arrival, but their pose slackens, "We had barely left the village…"
Eagle cuts over him with a disapproving tone, "Come, the Lord Hokage is waiting."
"Of course." Falcon replies.
The group continues into the tower, but Naruto starts to struggle, "I can walk you know! Believe it!"
"Of course, because you stole the scroll of sealing, which contains hidden Kinjutsu, from the Hidden Leaf's most protected vault by hand-standing the whole way. Now be quiet."
Surprisingly, he follows the orders.
The three shinobi, and one orange clad pre-Genin enter the Hokage's office. The room is semi-eyelet shaped (square with a tacked on semi-circle), with the Hokage's desk at the far end, facing the door. Behind it is a curved wall lined with windows, giving a good view into the surrounding village. Most of the office is cluttered, papers covering every inch of all possible surfaces. Sitting in his desk, the Hokage is waiting for them.
Falcon drops Naruto, pushing him into the middle of the room.
"You found him," The Hokage glances over Naruto, then the scroll, "Good, you brought the scroll as well."
He stands up from his seat and walks around the desk to Naruto, who'd scrambled to his feet after his captor dropped him on the floor.
"Who told you about the scroll?" The Hokage asks, his words are brief, and his tone serious.
"Huh?" Naruto gapes, he clearly thought he was about to be reprimanded, and by the posture of the distinguishable mask wearing trio, they had as well, "It was Mizuki, he told me I could pass the exam if I learnt one of the Jutsu in it, and I did! So I pass right?" He stutters out.
"I thought as much," he mutters, ignoring the blonde's question, then gestures to the two ANBU not involved in his capture, "Find Mizuki and capture him, then take him for questioning, lethal force is permitted."
Those words carry much meaning; Either Mizuki returns alive, or dead.
"It will be done." They leave, jumping out of the window.
Once they have left, the Hokage turns to Falcon, "Yudeta, take off the mask."
The masked ANBU does as told, revealing a face that has seen many battles, and lived through all of them.
"Yes?" The now revealed shinobi replies.
"Naruto has failed the academy exams again, but he cannot remain a pre-Genin. If what Jiraiya has reported holds true, we must move forward with his training." Naruto's jaw drops, but before he can comment, the Hokage continues, "Yudeta, you will be his tutor from now on. Consider this your Genin-team assignment, but you will only be teaching Naruto."
"Permission to speak freely Lord Hokage?"
"Granted."
"Why me?" he asks, "Surely others would be more predisposed to his… uh… to him."
"Hey! Tha-" The shinobi's sleeve blocks Naruto's outburst.
The Hokage ignores the interruption, "I believe you to be one of the most capable shinobi in our entire village. Your prior successes speak volumes about you as a teacher. Not only will you be able to train Naruto into a very capable shinobi, you have first-hand experience dealing with rampaging tailed beasts. Or have you forgotten why you came to The Hidden Leaf Village?"
"No, Lord Hokage." Yudeta answers curtly.
"Good. You might not be the best possible shinobi to teach Naruto, but you are the best shinobi I have available."
"Understood." He then turns to speak to Naruto, "Meet me at training ground eight at nine AM tomorrow morning."
He launches out of the office through the open window, trailing behind a large quantity of white mist.
After the office is quite clearly empty, and devoid of all gas, the Hokage lets out a long sigh, "Now, Naruto, it is time a few things were explained to you. Understand that this information was kept from you to keep you safe."
Naruto listens to him with rapt attention.
Tonight's the night. I can feel it.
It's going to happen.
Tonight, I will finally wake up on time, and I won't be late for my Genin-team assignment.
At 1PM the following afternoon.
"Huh, what time is it?" I drowsily say, opening my eyelids after an extensive sleep-in.
"Oh, right. I broke my clock."
I fumble my hand around my bedside table, searching for my watch.
"One… Wait, WHAT!"
I literally jump out of bed and race around my room getting ready.
Twenty-five minutes later I arrive at the front of the academy.
"OH SHIT I'M SO LATE!" I bolt straight past the receptionist, who after seeing me late every day just lazily waves as I pass.
My team has probably already left the building. Some first impression I'll make on my sensei.
"OW!" I run headfirst into someone in the corridor, barely noticing them in my panic, "Sorry!"
I rush straight past them, around the corner, and into the classroom, only two people are waiting there.
"Senken?" Sakura states in confusion, "You're late."
"That's an understatement." Sasuke adds, looking very relieved at my arrival. Can't blame him, I don't want to be left in a room alone with Sakura either. "At least you're not as late as our sensei."
"Wait, we're in a team together?" I ask.
"Yes. Here's your headband." He tosses it to me.
Great, I'm with the second most annoying person in class, and a person with an ego larger than said class' classroom. This is going to be fun.
"How is our sensei later than me? School started five hours ago! I only just got out of bed!"
The door to the class opens, the man I ran into in the corridor looks into the room. All of us go silent.
"Wait, you're that guy I ran into in the corridor! Sorry about that…"
"Hmm… How should I put this?" He looks between the three of us, "My first impression of this group, is that you're all annoying."
"You're our sensei?" Sasuke asks, raising an eyebrow.
"Why are you so late!" Sakura shouts, "All the other Jōnin got here hours ago!"
"Well… There was this black cat, I had to take the long route, didn't want the bad luck and all."
An awkward silence falls, the newcomer just looks confused at our expressions. Sasuke is just flicking his eyes between him and me in a partly confused, partly disbelieving expression. Sakura has her jaw hanging wide open, staring at our sensei.
"Ummm… Okay?" He says, thoroughly confused at our reactions, "Come with me to the roof."
"Alright, why don't you introduce yourselves, one at a time."
Our sensei has a look reminiscent of me when I first get out of bed, which is what I look like right now. His startlingly white hair is sticking out literally everywhere, gravity appears to have no effect on it, or he is single headedly responsible for the recent electricity shortage in the village. He wears the standard shinobi uniform and vest, but chooses to add a facemask of sorts, which conceals his mouth and nose. He wears his headband around his forehead like me, but his tilts downward to cover his left eye, most likely because he doesn't have one.
Us three fresh Genin are sitting on the rooftop, while our sensei is boredly sitting on the railing, acting like he'd rather be anywhere else.
"Introduce ourselves?" Sakura asks, "Well, what are we supposed to say?"
"Things you like, things you hate, dreams for the future, hobbies." He lists lazily, sounding thoroughly uninterested, obviously this is some compulsory exercise, "Things like that."
"Uhh… Why don't you go first sensei?" I offer, still in shock from before.
"Me? I'm Kakashi Hatake… Things I like, things I hate? I don't feel like telling you that."
"Sorry what?" I state.
He ignores me, "My dreams for the future… Never really thought about it. As for my hobbies… I have lots of hobbies."
"How informative" I sum up, going into my first stage of irritation, sarcasm, "So, you have a name?"
"Yes, glad to see you're paying attention. Just for that, you're next."
"Huh…? Oh uhm…. My name is Senken Oyufuttō, I guess I like sleeping a lot, and I hate waking up in the morning. My hobby is… Math? Training my skills? I also like running. My dream for the future… Don't really want to tell you that."
Kakashi's eyebrow raises when I tell him my name, guess he didn't read up about us with our teachers.
"Alright then, you next." He points at Sakura.
"Huh? Oh, my name is Sakura Haruno, what I like… I mean the person I like is…" She moans practically sensually at this thought. I feel bad for Sasuke, the way his Fanclub treats him is borderline stalker.
"My hobby is…" She moans again. This is getting out of hand.
"My dream for the future is…!" She squeals excitedly. I take back what I said, they should all be arrested, this has to be a criminal offence.
"Umm…" Kakashi breaks the silence, me and Sasuke are looking at Sakura, both with equally disgusted looks, and she is just lost in her own thoughts, "What do you hate?"
This brings her focus back to us, then she shouts, with way more vigour than before, "Naruto!"
Kakashi sighs then says to himself quietly, "Girls her age are more into boys than ninja training…" Can't say I disagree. If Sakura had put the same amount of time she spent fantasizing about Sasuke into training, I wouldn't be surprised if she was better than him.
"Alright, last one." He gestures to Sasuke.
Sakura giggles. Oh lord please no. Make something up Sasuke, say you're incredibly sexist or something, or better yet, tell her your gay, maybe then she'll leave you alone.
He pulls on his infamous brooding posture, and then dramatically looks off into the distance, "My name, is Sasuke Uchiha…" Wow, as much as I hate to admit it, he sounds like a badass, "I hate a lot of things." At this, he sends a quick sideways glance at Sakura, but she is too busy wiping the drool off her face with her sleeve to notice.
"And, I don't particularly like anything." Sakura exclaims at this, her face falling, but Sasuke shows no emotion, "What I have is not a dream, because I will make it a reality. I'm going to restore my clan, and destroy a certain someone…"
Everyone falls silent at this. Sakura is openly gaping at him, while Kakashi is just looking at Sasuke, the mask he wears concealing any sliver of emotion.
Barely a second later, Sakura regains her composure and starts to drool again.
Kakashi finishes whatever thought he was having, "Good, you're each unique and have your own ideas. We'll have our first mission tomorrow."
"What is it Kakashi-sensei?" I ask.
"It's a task that the four of us will do together. A survival exercise."
"I thought we were supposed to have a real mission, not more practise." Sakura complains, "We already did this stuff at the academy, that's how we got here."
"This is not like your previous training." He states, clearly withholding details deliberately just to annoy us.
By the progressive scrunching of her brow, I can tell Sakura is getting frustrated, "Then what kind of training is it?"
Kakashi chuckles maliciously.
My urge to comment gets the better of me, I dead stare at my new sensei, "Great, now I'm really looking forward to it. Honestly, I can't wait, this is like every holiday crammed into one little parcel of happiness and joy."
He chuckles again, "If I tell you the answer, you're not going to like it."
"Humour me."
"Of the twenty-seven graduates, only nine will actually be accepted as Genin. The other eighteen will be weeded out and sent back to the academy. In other words, this is a make it or break it pass/fail test, and the chance you'll fail is at least sixty-six percent."
We all gasp in shock, except Sasuke of course, he just pulls the famous Uchiha dead stare of doom at our sensei.
"See? Didn't I tell you you wouldn't like it?"
We are all stunned into silence, but Sakura huffs out, "But what about the graduation exam? Was that all for nothing?"
"That? The exam was just to select candidates that might become Genin. Or not. That's how it is, I decide whether you pass or fail. Be at the designated training spot at five AM, and bring your ninja gear."
Huh, this was unexpected. I look at my teammates to see any reactions, Sakura has a steely face of determination, I can only imagine what she must be thinking. It goes without saying that Sasuke is expressionless, but he somewhat clenches his jaw at least.
"That's it, you're dismissed." He waves over his shoulder, "Oh, and tomorrow you better skip breakfast, or you'll puke."
At training ground eight.
Naruto and his new sensei are on a sort of grassy hill, full of flowers and long grass. This training ground is rarely used, as it doesn't provide a unique terrain, everyone knows how to fight on completely flat ground with no cover. Naruto is wearing his signature offensively orange suit, and his sensei is wearing the standard ninja uniform, with a combat vest over the front.
"Hello sensei." Naruto greets, "What are we doing today?"
"I have to gauge your skill, otherwise I won't know where to start with your training."
"Great, another exam."
"You better 'Believe it'." He mocks Naruto deliberately to throw him off guard, sadly, it works. "First up, Taijutsu." He blurs behind Naruto before he can even react and throws him a good twenty metres away.
"That hurt!"
"Did it?" He says from behind Naruto again, "Now, fight back."
"Fine, Shadow Clone Ju- ow" He gets hit in the head by Yudeta's arm.
"I said Taijutsu, not Ninjutsu." He gets thrown, again.
"Oi, I'm not a ball." Naruto shouts annoyedly.
"Really? You seem to have the intelligence of one." He retorts, "Attack me."
"Sure thing boss." The blonde replies.
Yudeta appears behind him again, "For someone who can steal the scroll of sealing from the most heavily guarded vault in the entire village, you seem to be unable to even throw a punch." He gets thrown again.
"Quit it!"
"Fine, you appear to be rather incapable at Taijutsu, so we'll move on to Ninjutsu."
"You didn't even give me a chance!" Naruto complains.
"I gave you three chances, in one of which I stood still for ten seconds to monologue, you didn't even try to hit me."
"You were talking! I didn't want to interrupt you, it would've been unfair."
"We are shinobi, we don't fight fair. Learn it."
Half an hour later.
Naruto pants out, dripping wet, "You really suck."
"I'm not the one who fell into a river."
"Thanks for the reminder."
In a corridor on the ground floor of the academy.
Well that was fun.
My stomach growls. It's nearly three in the afternoon and I didn't have breakfast, or I guess lunch, before I left. Seeing as I won't be eating tomorrow morning, I should eat my fill today. I also need to convince my team members to work with me, since teamwork will probably play a large part in whatever Kakashi has in store for us. It is what the leaf values most in its budding shinobi, according to my sister at least.
But, what better way to build a sense of teamwork, than eating lunch together?
"Hey, Sasuke, Sakura. Want to get lunch?"
Sasuke replies first, "No, I have to train for tomorrow."
Never a free moment with him. Training this, training that. Wouldn't be surprised if he spent more time training than I do sleeping, which is no small feat.
Me and Sakura exchange a look, she shakes her head, "It'd be weird if we went just the two of us."
"Yeah, you're right. Wouldn't want to send the wrong message." I turn to Sasuke, avoiding a disgusted stare from Sakura, "Another time then?"
"hn" He walks off, leaving my question unanswered.
"Wait for me Sasuke!" Sakura follows him, waving her hand in the air.
"One of these days…" I stare at him, "So much for team bonding, heck, so much for team. We'll never work well together."
Sasuke is too proud to ever admit that he can't do everything alone. Sure, he has a heck of a lot of skill and power, plus the whole Uchiha clan's famous Sharingan, I don't really know what it does, but it sounds intimidating. Sasuke mainly lacks teamwork, or more accurately, he refuses to believe that a team could help him in any way. Sakura is basically the opposite of Sasuke, I don't think she would have any trouble working in a team, provided Sasuke was on said team. The main issue, apart from her fangirlism, is just that she is incapable. Next to Sasuke, she's a fluffy, obnoxiously pink little kitten. Sure, she has claws, but at the end of the day, she's still a kitten.
That analogy got weird quickly.
I fiddle with my headband in frustration, trying to jostle it into a comfortable position, which I don't find. Before I got my own, I thought it was just an inscribed metal plate attached to a strip of fabric. But now I'm wearing one, I notice there's this annoying piece of metal in the exact centre of the cloth, concealed behind the plate bearing the village's symbol, and it irritatingly pokes into your forehead. I can only imagine what purpose it serves.
If I'm not having lunch with my team, I should probably take the next while to train.
Most of my skills could use some work, but I don't have anyone to spar against, or give me instructions on new techniques, though I doubt I could master any by tomorrow. I have no choice but to just refine my already existing techniques.
I wander to the seventh training ground, aptly named "Training ground seven". The whole ground is covered by trees, obscuring it from view. It's the one I use to practise Ninjutsu, as I don't particularly want people to watch me. Around the back of the ground is a decently sized waterfall, which lands in a lake. The banks of said lake are pebbled. It's the perfect place to practice fire and water Jutsu, as you won't accidentally start a forest-fire or a flash-flood.
I run through my memorised Jutsu library, most of which I either learnt from books, or came up with myself. I basically pick a few at random that I haven't done in a while.
"Fire Style: Ash Bomb!" My throat heats up as the chakra congeals inside of it, but before I can shoot the explosive out of my mouth, I choke, causing me to miss horribly. Why in the world do so many Jutsu have to come out of your mouth? Why can't it come out of your bellybutton or something for once?
"Lets try again, Fire Style: Ash Bomb!" I choke again. The sphere of concentrated chakra and hot ash just aimlessly fizzles as it lands in the water.
"Something else then." I cough out. Seems my gag reflex is a surprisingly limiting factor in my Jutsu usage.
"Fire Style: Flame Missile!" A small missile of scorching hot fire launches at the waterfall from my hand, it makes it there, but on my command, or rather thought, it swerves right just before dissipating into the water. This is one I invented myself, it combines the idea of the elemental dragon Jutsu, which give you control over the missile, and the smallness of the flame shot jutsu, which adds speed. Sure, it's less powerful and intimidating then a dragon made of pure fire, and its slower than the flame shot, but combining the major ideas of the two makes for a powerful combo. Also, I don't have the chakra to make a fire dragon, the memory to learn the forty or so handsigns, or the skill to do it in less.
I became infatuated with formulating concepts for new Jutsu ever since I saw the Hokage do a Ninjutsu demonstration. He sent unimaginable things flying in every direction, and I had to try it for myself. Unfortunately, most of the jutsu you can learn about in the academy is so basic anyone who has control over their chakra can perform them, like the clone Jutsu. So, I may or may not have snuck into the Chūnin, and later Jōnin, library to learn new ones. Seriously though, they are scarily undefended.
Although, despite my… Adventures, into the more complicated books. I can't actually perform the vast majority of the Jutsu I read about. Most of them required much higher chakra reserves, or better chakra control then I had. So, I say that I learnt my Jutsu from books, but in actuality I got the concepts from books.
All Jutsu must have been conceptualised and then later performed by someone, but creating your own is surprisingly simple, though it helps that I found a book that teaches you how to do it by some guy, probably a huge closet nerd, called "Orochimaru" no last name given. It was filed under the "forbidden without Hokage permission" section, but what are rules anyway?
All you have to do is understand why handsigns do things, how chakra works, then which handsign does what. Once you have an idea, just come up with a couple different sequences of handsigns, then try each one applying different amounts of chakra until something happens. To be brief, nine times out of ten it blows up in your face, but the remaining one time, either you get the desired outcome or a completely unexpected, yet not entirely unwelcome outcome.
Using this, I can create useful Jutsu that I can perform with minimal to moderate stress on my chakra by emphasizing that in my conceptualisation. Even so, I can only perform about three or four fire missiles before I exhaust my reserves. Though, my original Jutsu don't only extend to combat, I made one that boils the kettle in about thirty seconds, and my newest creation… Is a work in progress at best.
"Fire Style: Flash!" Nothing happens. The idea behind this one is to create an extremely bright flash of light in your hands, which will hopefully blind opponents for long enough to get a hit in. I also want to use as little chakra as possible, since I might have to use it a lot. Although, I haven't actually managed to get it to work more than once yet, but if I ever fight against a Hyūga, something like this might come in handy. Although I think that they won't be able to see through their own eyelids, I haven't tested it, and a Hyūga would never just tell me about their weaknesses.
"Hmm… Maybe less chakra? Fire Style: Flash!" My hand literally sets on fire.
"Oh shit!" I dunk it into the water.
Good thing I had chakra concentrated in my hands to perform the Jutsu, otherwise I'd have serious burns right now. Gosh I hate fire.
Like almost everyone, I can perform every basic element, but for every element except fire, the chakra drain is at least ten times greater, which I guess means it's my natural affinity.
"It might not be the amount of chakra… The concentration?" I spend the next twenty seconds gathering a small amount of chakra in my hand, and then compressing it into a single point on my palm. The mental focus required is immense.
I run through the hand signs, doing my best to keep the chakra together, "Fire Style: Flash!"
BANG
I get the desired effect, an extremely powerful flash of light spreads from my hands, but it is accompanied by an extremely loud noise, so loud I fall to my knees in pain and shock.
"OW!" I scream, unable to even hear myself because of the ringing.
Never using that again.
One could say I'm playing it a bit dangerous by literally playing with fire, but I like to call it an unnecessary necessary risk.
So, in brief, I'm almost certainly going to use it again, multiple times, especially when people around me least expect it.
In training ground eight.
"Why do I have to do this?" Naruto is just punching thin air.
"You have no form, in other words, no skill. You have power, but that only gets you so far. Without proper form and style to your taijutsu, you will lose every battle against a trained shinobi, regardless of rank."
"But what if I have such overwhelming power that it doesn't matter."
"Well, do you?" He asks, "Didn't think so, and even if you did you could be even more powerful by having proper form. The longer you use this mess you call a style, the harder it will be to learn a proper one, and then eventually develop your own which ties in your strengths and abilities in other areas."
Naruto looks confused, "What?" He replies intelligently.
Yudeta sighs, "Think of me, I use my jet technique to amplify my speed, so I utilise that to be wherever my opponent's guard isn't. You don't have that, so instead you might think of incorporating clones into your style."
"Huh. I think I get it. So, you fight in a style that suits your strengths?"
"In short, yes."
"So, seeing as my strengths aren't style, can we skip this?"
Yudeta lets out the longest sigh yet, possibly the longest one ever, "Why do I have to do this…"
The next morning.
"Hmphh… What time is it…" I grumble, awakening from my sleep. Yesterday was a very eventful day.
"Huh, nine?" I jolt awake, "Why does this always happen!"
"Training ground three, soon to be my new favourite place in the world. Hang on, Kakashi-sensei?"
I spot my new teacher; he's only just arrived at the training ground.
"Hmm?" He looks around for whoever called his name, "Oh, it's you Senken."
"What are you doing here?" I ask, "We were supposed to start nearly five hours ago."
"I could ask you the same question."
"Umm… I got lost?"
"Huh. Good one, mind if I share?"
I look at him, raising my eyebrows, but he just stares at me expectantly.
I shrug, "Sure." Might as well just go along with my sensei's antics.
We enter the training ground. Most of the area is lightly forested, except for a small clearing. A shallow river runs through the entire ground, from one end to the other. On our side of the river, two figures are expectantly waiting for us, situated next to three ominous looking wooden posts.
"Morning you two, ready for your first day?"
"Senken! Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura shouts at us, "You're five hours late!"
"We got lost." Kakashi offers, and I nod my head vigorously. I'm still surprised I got off that easily.
"No you didn't! Senken goes here all the time, and you're a Jōnin, how can you not know where all the training grounds are!" We don't reply, and she adds in a frustrated undertone, "You probably both just overslept, knowing Senken."
Sasuke sighs, "Can we start already? I've been here since four AM."
"Not my problem." I sneer at him. Stupid idiot probably set a bunch of traps or something, but knowing my luck as an actual stupid idiot because setting traps seems like a really smart thing to do, I'm gonna walk right into them.
"Well," Kakashi clears his throat, "Let's get started."
Oh goodie.
He walks over to the posts, and pulls an alarm clock out of somewhere, then places it on the middle post.
"Here we go." He presses down on the top of it, activating the alarm, "Its set for noon."
"The assignment is very simple; you just have to take these bells from me. That's all there is to it." He explains, "If you can't get them by noon, you go without lunch. You'll be tied to those posts, and you'll watch as I eat my lunch in front of you."
"You little…" I mumble. Of course, I should have seen it coming. Little albino hedgehog already got the better of me, and we haven't even started.
"Wait a minute, there's three of us. How come there's only two bells?" Sakura asks. Huh I didn't even think of that.
He gives us a wide smile, or I think he does, the mask makes it difficult to tell, but he squints his eyes in a devious manner at the very least, "Well, that way at least one of you will end up tied to a post, and ultimately disqualified for failing to complete the mission."
He jingles the bells in front of us for dramatic effect, "That one goes back to the academy." We all wince at this, including Sasuke, "Then again, all three of you could flunk out too. You can use any weapons, including shuriken; if you're not prepared to kill me, you won't be able to take the bells."
Sakura is visibly taken aback, "Those weapons are too dangerous sensei! We could hurt ourselves." I like how she assumes that we aren't going to hurt Kakashi, before we even started.
On second thought it's because I'm on the team. Shurikens, Kunai? I call them field obstacles, because I throw them somewhere and then trip over them later in battle.
I reckon Sasuke could get a few good hits in, but if Kakashi stays on the defensive, I doubt he could take the bells on his own. I could use him as a distraction, but then again, I doubt that would even work. I don't think Sakura will be of any use, regardless of what she tries.
No matter which way I think about it, unless he SERIOUSLY underestimates us, the only way we have a shred of hope at getting any of those bells is if we work together. I can't think of any other options.
Now comes the hard part, how do I get them to work with me? Convincing Sasuke is the key, Sakura will follow him, but how do I convince him that he needs help? Well, I don't, but I might as well try.
"When I say start, you can begin."
"Sasuke, I know you think that you can do this alone, but you can't, none of us can. I did some reading about this guy, he's like the fourth best shinobi in the village. We don't stand a chance alone."
"Thanks!" Kakashi eye-smiles at me approvingly, "I think I might go easier on you now."
"Hn" Sasuke glares at me. Either he thinks I'm lying, or he doesn't care, or he's an idiot, I'm leaning towards the latter option, "You can work with me by staying out of my way."
Well, so much for trying.
"Start." Kakashi shouts from a good ten metres away.
"What about you Sakura?" I turn around to look at her, "Please, work with me!"
She doesn't even hear me, Sasuke just started running for Kakashi and she can't take her eyes off him.
I don't really have a choice anymore, it's do or die, let's hope this works.
I start running for Kakashi and Sasuke, who are both currently engaging in Taijutsu, I concentrate my chakra and…
"Fire Style: Very Slightly Toxic Smog." The gas builds up in my throat, it seems neither of them has noticed what I'm doing yet. It takes all my mental effort to not puke, it tastes horrible. Forcing myself, I blow out a small cloud of invisible, very slightly poisonous gas into the two brawling in front of me.
This brings a whole new meaning to silent but deadly.
"This is boring," Kakashi gets a grab on one of Sasuke's legs, and throws him to the ground, effectively immobilising him.
Then he pulls out an orange book, opens it at a marked page, and starts to read.
"Uhh…" I say confused, "Are you going to take this seriously?"
"Do I have to?"
"Good point."
I can see Sasuke is starting to get slower in his movements, the gas did its job. My plan wasn't to attack Kakashi, after all his mask would likely filter the poison out, but this gas isn't harmful, its anaesthetic. Sasuke will get progressively slower and slower the longer he's in the cloud. I don't want to sabotage him; I just need him to think he can't even stand a chance against Kakashi. So that Kakashi then in turn lowers his own guard because of our ineptitude. Don't believe me?
"Sasuke!" I shout out, "Get down! Fire Style: Flame Missile!" Kakashi lazily tilts his body out of the way, bad move.
Just before the missile passes him it swerves. For the first time Kakashi looks genuinely startled, but he has no time to move out of the way. He's enveloped in a cloud of smoke as the missile connects.
"That was close." Kakashi says from behind me, "You ruined my book."
I slowly turn around to look at him, sure enough, he's holding the burnt remains of decently sized novel. He must have used it to block the missile. It doesn't really have a lot of power, it relies on manoeuvrability to be effective, but flammable objects, well, they get flammabled.
"Fuck this, I'm out." I scream as I run at top speed away from the pissed off Jōnin.
"Not so fast." Kakashi says from in front of me, "Mind your language as well."
"Sakura help me!"
Fortunately, Sasuke is the one who comes back into the battle. Although I shouted for Sakura, I was hoping for him, as much as I hate to admit it.
The only way to get Sasuke to actually work with me is to establish that he is vastly superior, although, this isn't entirely true, I am powerful in my own right. But if he still refuses to work with me, my setup works for my backup plan
"Duck again!" I shout over the sounds of their hand to hand combat, "Fire Style: Smoke Bomb!"
Sasuke looks confused as to why I'd use a smoke bomb, but Kakashi, learning from before, jumps clear.
"Sasuke get out!" I scream at him. The panic in my voice clearly raises some alarms in his brain and he jumps away as well.
Typically, smoke bombs make a lot of smoke for use as cover, but as a jutsu it's called: 'Fire Style: Smoke'. Smoke bomb isn't a bomb that produces smoke, it's a bomb disguised as smoke.
In all honesty I meant to use the other one. But in my defence, they are very similar, and I guess it helps with my plan if Sasuke and Kakashi think I'm incompetent.
"heh heh… Wrong jutsu…" I mutter out loud as the little cloud hits the ground.
It explodes with the force of a decently made paper bomb, making me stumble in the shockwave. Kakashi looks surprised again, but this time not out of mild fear, but more out of curiosity.
I follow up my display of incompetency by throwing a few shuriken at Kakashi. One hits Sasuke in the boot, the other embeds itself in a tree off to the left and the other flies up and behind me somewhere.
Sasuke turns to look at me in an, 'are you serious' kind of stare and Kakashi looks like he genuinely can't believe what he just saw.
I facepalm, "There goes half my chakra, stupid Senken, use the god-damn right jutsu next time." I take the short moment I've got to look around for Sakura. She's on the floor unconscious.
"Genjutsu? When'd he have time to do that?" Seriously, he was fighting Sasuke the entire time… "Oh shit, he can probably make elemental clones."
"Good job, you're smarter than you look!" I hear from behind me, I barely have any time to react, but I've been charging this for a few seconds and it's all I got.
I point my cupped hands behind me, "Fire Style: Flash!"
BANG
The same cripplingly loud noise rings out, but clone-Kakashi gets a full blast of it. Please be a water clone, loud noises and water jutsu don't mix well, as in the jutsu falls apart because of vibrations and science.
"Ow, that actually hurt."
"Wait, you weren't the clone?"
"No." He's wide open, probably still reeling from the light and sound. I only got some of it, he got a full blast of the stuff. I can see the bells, he's not in a defensive stance, this could be my chance.
Suddenly I can see Sakura break out of the genjutsu, impressive, I didn't think she'd be able t- There's a shuriken in her leg.
And now I'm on the floor, don't take your eyes off the dangerous target in front of you, got it.
An hour and a half later, at noon.
Ring! Ring!
"You all failed!"
Eh, I expected as much. I had some good ideas. If I squint from a distance, I just might have been able to get a bell. That is literally, if I was squinting and farther away, the flash and noise wouldn't have been so bad, and I may have been able to steal one instead of being in pain and on the floor, maybe.
Sakura complains, "But Kakashi-Sensei! How could we succeed, you're a Jōnin and we're just Genin!"
"Do I care? You failed the mission, that's all that matters. In the shinobi world, you don't get to fail just because you're underqualified, you either complete the task, or you die trying."
"What if we can't complete the mission, and the person who gave it to us knows that." I state to him, refusing to play this game. He can't send us back to the academy. I won't believe it.
"Then you better try your damned hardest!" He raises his voice at us, "If you can't throw away your life for the sake of the mission, then you should go back to the academy!"
I match his volume, "So we just pointlessly throw away people lives just to complete some mission?! There's always a better way than sacrificing people!" I stunned him into silence, "If we have to let our fellow shinobi, no, anyone die, then… Then the mission isn't worth it…"
His lip curls in anger, "Is that what you all believe? You think that the mission comes second?"
Sakura nods, still surprised from my words. Sasuke is glaring at me again, but this time in a slightly approving way, then he gives a slight dip of his head. Never guessed him to be a loyal person.
Kakashi let's out a deep sigh.
"You say that, but you failed at the single thing this exercise is trying to teach you. Teamwork."
We are all concentrating on every word he says. But just saying, I called the whole teamwork thing.
"The bells are designed to promote discord in the group, but there could have been three bells, and everything would have happened the same way. None of you worked as a team." He explains to us, then adds, "I hate to say it, but Senken actually was the most helpful for breaking Sakura out of the Genjutsu, even if it was an accident."
He shamed us into silence, or I think that's what's happening. Sasuke reveals nothing and Sakura just looks scared, so maybe just me on the shame.
"I'll give you one more chance after lunch to get the bells." He narrows his eye, "But Senken doesn't get to eat anything and is tied to the post so he can't." He pulls out two lunches from somewhere, and hands them to Sakura and Sasuke.
"What, why me?"
"Sakura is going to need stitches after this." He answers me coldly.
"Fair enough."
"Not to mention the circus act you were performing that whole time."
"Fair enough."
"And you destroyed my book."
"Okay I get it! Tie me to the… woah" In an invisible burst of speed I'm already tied to the post.
"If you two feed him, I'll know." Then he disappears in a swirl of leaves.
"Dammit!" I shout, then slump my head down, "Sorry guys I'm out, my Taijutsu is alright, but not good enough. At that distance my projectiles are more likely to hit the Hokage than Kakashi-sensei. My only selling point apart from being able to run away really fast is that I can do lots of ninjutsu, for about every situation, but I'm-"
Sasuke cuts me off with a sigh, a sigh. That's power right there. "I know where you're going with this, no food equals no chakra equals no jutsu equals you can't do anything. Not that you were much help before, but I will admit that you seem to be fairly knowledgeable when it comes to ninjutsu and it would be helpful to have someone like that on our team. Take it." He holds the food up to me.
Sakura just watches in amazement and, hold on, is that jealousy? I know I said for Sasuke to say he was gay, but that was a joke, and I didn't even say it out loud.
Wait, did I say it out loud? Nope, filing that thought away.
Then Sakura sighs as well, "Take some of mine too."
"Uhh, I appreciate the offer, I really do, but there's a few main problems with it. One, Kakashi-sensei would flay us alive and two, I can't use my hands."
Sasuke looks around quickly, "Sensei isn't watching, he's probably gone off to find another excuse so he can come back late, and Sakura, feed him."
She looks like she's going to decline, but the power stare Sasuke is giving her radiates trouble, "Only because you told me to Sasuke…" Sakura complains as she lifts a piece of food towards my mouth. "I didn't know you were a ninjutsu specialist Senken. That's… pretty cool."
I swallow the food, "No I'm more a running away from things specialist, especially from scary things like Kakashi-Sensei."
Kakashi laughs, "I'm scary?" Hold on, Kakashi?
We all freeze, "So, I gave you one order and you immediately break it, no surprises, that was exactly what you said you would do, and I respect you for following through." We all brace ourselves for the coming onslaught.
He narrows his eyes at us, the very air around us plummets in temperature, all three of us are extremely on edge and almost afraid. "So, as punishment for breaking the one and only rule!" Is this true killing intent? (or I guess punishment intent) I've only ever felt my sister's light version of it.
"You all… Pass"
"Come again?" My eyebrows furrow in confusion, "but you sai-"
He cuts across me, "In the shinobi world, those who abandon the mission. or in this case the rules, are scum, it's true." All our eyes are locked onto him, "But, those who would abandon their comrades, are worse than scum."
We meet each other's gaze, sharing disbelieving expressions. Then our sensei turns, and starts walking away, "Come with me."
We follow his orders
We stop in front of a large obelisk. From a distance it looks damaged and chipped, but from here, you can make out names, carved into every face of the stone.
"These are the names of every shinobi that died to protect our village."
We collectively skim through all the names, realising the full impact of what they mean.
"Many of my comrades are on this stone."
Every single one of these people lived, served the village, and then died for it.
"It's important to remember them, so they don't just live on as words on a rock."
None of them asked for this fate. None of them wanted to leave their loved ones behind.
"You are all dismissed, congratulations, you are now Genin. Tomorrow at nine AM you are to be outside this training field for our first training session."
I don't even hear him.
All those shinobi gave their lives so people like me could grow up.
I didn't notice everyone else leave. I was now alone in the clearing, standing like a hollow suit of armour.
I was in a trance of emotion, oblivious to the happenings around me.
I don't know why this is having such an impact on me, no-one I know has died before, it's as if I'm remembering something, but the memory slips away before I can grasp it.
-Pain-
Every part of my body convulsed as if a million volts suddenly coursed through me.
My eyes burnt, I jammed them closed in response, but the pain didn't cease.
I was falling, fast. The ground rushed past me. There was no time, there was no world. It was gone, gone, gone, disappearing above me. I keep falling, further into the ceaseless void.
The ground hits me with jarring force. There are figures looking down at me. Faces I don't recognise.
As if they were right next to me, I hear a voice.
"You're all that's left, you must live!"
I blacked out.
Author Note:
Sorry if that last bit broke the pace of the story, but you can't make a story where only funny stuff happens. Not only would it suck, but I'm not a good enough writer to make everything funny. Sometimes a joke flops, different senses of humour, etc.
As such the best reviews you can give me are whether or not my jokes are funny. I'm always open to trying different styles of comedy. Just know, I try to only include jokes that I actually laugh at while I'm writing or conceptualising.
Sorry about this being the second 8k words chapter in a row. The next one is a manageable 6k, but the one after that is like 9k, soooooo...
Anyways, the next chapter is probably the best so far, and the one that actually has the most importance to my story, see you then!
Next up, Part Three: It's a Date?