at nirvana
"So how does it feel to be filming a commerical mr. cobaine" says the reporter
"Feels awesomesauce" said kirk into the microphone
kirk cobaine, kris n-word (i dont know how to spell his name sorry) and dave grohl were standin in front of the super market, instruments at the ready. they were surrounded by tv cameras and film equipment and a crowd of adoring fans.
"KIRKKKK OVER HEREEEE I LOVE YOUR MUSIC AHHHHHHH" scramed trucy from atop phenix's shoulders. She was wearing an offical nirvana tshirt of the album cover with the naked baby penis swimming under water.
"look there lads" said dave, pointing her out with a drumbstick "that bird is wearing a nirvana t-shirt, she must be a big fan of our music"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YES I AM AHHHHHHHHH"
"GUARDS" said Kirk Cobaine "clear a path for that girl and her friends" so the guards started pushing people out the way and led trucy, pheonix, and apollo to nirvana
"oh my got" said trucy "its so great to meet you guys in person"
"yeah im a big fan" said apollo tryin to impress them "i know all your music"
"FAKE FAN" said trucy "name a single song"
apollos hair sweated "ummmm heart shaped bottle"
everyone lauged at him for being stupit
and then trucy got an autohraph
"omg tank you" said trucry
"It's nice to know some people still have good taste in music" said kirk "most people nowadays only lissen to bad music like gun 'n' roses and billie ellish"
"ewwww, gun n roses! talk about corporate no talent hacks" said trucy smartly. "And billie ellish? shes a peace of filth. i call her silly hellish. becuz quite frankly shes dusgustin and shes going to hell"
pheinx beamed becaus he was proud of his daughter for being so smart and hating the bad people. he maybe a drunk hobo but he raised his daugher wright.
kirk turned to the band. "you boys ready to rock?"
"Lets do this bloody thing, kirk" said dave.
"Oh yeah, I'm ready to play guitar" said kris.
Kirk Cocaine raised his pick trimumphantly in the air and it glinted in the sunlight. "Then lets make a commerical, boys!"
"Nirvana Piggly Wiggly commercial, take one!" The clapperboard snapped shut and Nirvanar immediately broke into "Smell like teen sprit" but with the lyrics modified to be about piggly wiggly
(A/N you should probably play a midi of smells like teen sprit here and also sing along for the full effect)
load up on buns
and bring your friends
the deals and savings, they never end
the discount program, its like a reward
uh oh, i just stepped, into a turd
prices so low, how low, how low, how low?
how low, how low, how low, how low?
how low, how low, how low, how low?
so low, so low, so low!
the customer service, it's bodacious
here we are now, at piggly wiggly!
the friendly smiles, they're contaigous
here we are now, at piggly wiggly!
i buy good food
i buy food here
piggly wilggly
super good food
YEAH EAH
Phoenix and his friends were grooving to thsoe funky nirvina beats WHEN SUDDENLY there was a gunshot and the band's manajor dead
"WHAT THE FUCK" said kirk as people scremed and run away "WHO DID THIS"
"I think I know whomst" said a voice, and that voice was famus prosecutor KEVIN LAWYER emerging from the crowd. He pointed at kirk and snapped his fingers. "Detective Dickshoe!" he barked. "place kirk cornhole under arest. NOW"
"aye aye boss" said John Dickshoe and he put a hancuff aroun kirk's neck and dragg3ed him into the police car
"oh, not cool my dude!" said kris nword
"oy that wanker knicked kirk" said dave
"What a scoop!" exclaimed Hank Urman. "Douche bag, follow me!"
and kris, dave, hank, and dewey ran after the police car while Phoenix confrotned Kevin
"Lawyer!" ejaculated Pheinx "what in the world did you arrest kirk for!?"
kevin grinned from behind his 50,000$ shades "because he shot his manajor, Mann Ajor. why else?"
"OBJECTION" said trucy "kirky couldnt have done it because he has ALIBIE he was playing with the band when the gunshot went off SO HES INNOCENT"
kevin laughed "haha nice try but kirk had ample oppurtuinty to do murder TAKE THAT" and he presented kirk's guitar "this guitar is specially made in bagornia so its also a GUN. Kirk could easily have shot mann guy while playing. next time actualyl use your brain before you stupid"
"NOOOOOOOOOOO" cried trucy and she was penalized
kevin lawyer loled and climbed the supermarket and grabbed onto his hang glider. Kevin Lawyer is the president, founder, and ceo of the Prosecutors Hang Gliding Club of California. He's in charge and everyone has to do what he says or else.
"better luck next time, kid" said Kevin and he fly off
"I'M NOT A KID I'M 18" said trucy but kevin threw paper at her and flew away to the prosecutor's office to begin criminal prosecution proceedure against kirk
Pheniks laid a hand on Trucy's shoudler. "Don't worry sweetness daddy will get Kirk off. Umm uh i mean i'll represent him in court."
"Then you dont think he's guilty, sor?" asked Apollo.
"No, I believe it's a frame job. Don't you think it's rather suspicious that Kevin Lawyer and that detective just so happened to be waiting nearby to arrest him?"
"Yeah, now that you mention it, that is pretty suspicious," replied Apollo.
So everyone piled into Apollo's car to go to the detention center. But first Phoenix put Mann Ajor's corpse in his briefcase.
"if the police are just going to leave it here i might as well steal it" pheonix thought logically and he also threw dave's drumset through the window of piggly wiggly and stole some more grape juice. but before he broke the window, he noticed a bullethole in the glass... interesting...