Hello everyone and welcome back to this story. I know it's been a long time, but my updates will be frequent from now on. I will post a new chapter in a three-week period. I got a lot of positive feedback for the first chapter and I'm really grateful for that! Tysm! Here now comes chapter two, I hope you will enjoy!
Chapter 2 – "On the Surface"
„Well, what brings you here, sweetheart?"
I'm so engrossed in my thoughts that I didn't notice his presence. Startled, I spin around. How long is he already standing in the doorframe?
Haymitch just stands there, with the ghost of a grin on his lips and a bottle of wine in his hand. His blonde hair falls in dirty strands over his forehead. He didn't even bother to brush it properly.
My nightgown suddenly seems too generous. I'm thankful, though, that I didn't put my make-up off. Without respond, I stand up and want to pass past him, when he starts to survey me.
„You're teensy", he remarks and laughs amused. „How's air down there?"
I shoot him an angry look but it doesn't seem to bother him. I escape abruptly of the car, calling out to him across my shoulder: „Better mind not being too drunk until dawn!"
I know he heard it, but he doesn't answer. He made short work with sobriety, but everyone could have figured out this would happen once he gets his fingers back on the liquor. Although my behavior wasn't quite proper either.
Once I reach my rooms, I lock the door behind me. I silently set about removing my wig. It's fixed in my hair with lots of little pins. It takes a while until I have them removed completely. I untie the braid, which held my hair in place under the wig, and a moment later it falls in soft curls over my shoulders. Then, I deal with my face. Luckily it's a lot easier to remove the oodles of make-up.
An entire other woman eyes me out of the mirror. Without the make-up, the faked smile and the artificial hair I look like a totally new human being. I even feel like it. Only now, I can see the diverse emotions flickering in my eyes, having been suppressed by the make-up before. My feelings are a secret I hide through my make-up. Eventually, I am the only one ever seeing me like this.
oOo
Today's highlight is the opening ceremony. Especially for the Capitol citizen a peculiar moment, seeing their favorite victors of the past years again. I started the day with mixed emotions, sitting ready prepared at the table in the Training Center.
Katniss and Peeta left after our arrival in the hands of their prep teams. Haymitch didn't bother to show up. He's probably sleeping off his hangover.
I bring our last nights' odd meeting in the train in mind and bend over my folder with a sigh. All important sponsors, Haymitch and I are about to meet, are listed there. Some of them already supported us last year while others are new. A look at my clock reveals that it's almost time for lunch. I'm not sure if I should wake Haymitch or let him sleep in peace. Eventually I decide to do the former.
I pause in front of Haymitch's door and knock. No reaction. I knock again, this time more intensively. „Haymitch?" Then finally, I hear him mutter something from inside. „It's already noon", I try to explain my appearance. „I thought, maybe you'd like to eat something?" Somehow I feel foolish, standing here in in front of his door and requesting him for lunch.
I'm utterly surprised when he opens his door after all. He has dark circles under his eyes, therefore he didn't get much sleep last night. His grey eyes are glassy, what tells me that the alcohol not fully left his body yet. Although he doesn't looks angry, what I interpret as a good omen. His mask falters for a brief moment and I can see pain in his eyes.
„Are you all right?" My voice sounds much too pitying and I can tell upon his reaction that he doesn't want my pity. But I don't pity him, do I?
„I'll be right there, just give me five minutes", he says and slams the door in my face. His behavior leaves a lot to be desired but I'm used to it ultimately.
„It won't do any harm to follow some manners", I say enraged, still facing the door. Then I head back to the living room. I know that he heard me through the door.
After fifteen minutes, he turns up fully dressed. Admittedly, his hair isn't brushed but at least he wears a new shirt. We have lunch brought in silence. While I eat, I bend over the folder and peruse the sponsors again. I don't need to lift my head to know that Haymitch is totally immersed by the meal.
Eventually, the table is long cleared, I run out of steam and get sick of the sight of the sponsors. With a muffled tone, I shut the folder. Haymitch turns his head off his drink in wonder and glares at me across the table.
I don't want to talk to him, so I ignore him and take out my notebook. I glance at the few sketches which grace the first pages. They're not beautiful but they help to distract myself. For a while, I doodle around, abstracted.
Then, Haymitch suddenly bursts out laughing. He looks totally amused. I wince in shock and look up, startled. Our eyes meet. I rise my eyebrows in question.
He laughs so heavily, he needs a minute to recover. „You actually chew on your pencil", he bursts out. He grins from ear to ear.
My face abruptly goes bright red, what he -due to my make-up- luckily can't see. Then, I look down at my pencil and I notice he's right. I didn't even recognize, but there clearly are dental impressions discernible. How embarrassing! My mother would be furious at my lack of manners. And then of all things, Haymitch had to catch me. He of all people, who I jumped at because of his behavior more than once.
I raise my head and try to not look affected.
He must see the shame in my eyes because he doesn't seem to make fun of me anymore. „Don't worry, sweetheart, I won't tell anyone", he says conciliatorily and gives me a crooked smile, even a wink.
Before my brain can react, my lips already curve into a faint smile. Wow, now I can't even trust myself anymore. I'm sitting in the Training Center und give Haymitch Abernathy a smile. Now he really must think I've gone mad. I never smile at him. The time of grins and smiles is long gone. Except the fake smiles. But this one wasn't fake. And because of that fact, I feel all the more stupid.
Before he can say anything that would make me feel more foolish than I already do, I grab my things together, excuse myself, and flee the room.
Back in my room I want to put the notebook back on the nightstand when the scratch catches my eye. It feels as if the blood in my veins freezes. Thunderstruck, I pause in my movement and stare at a girl's face. She cannot be older than thirteen. Her eyes stick out in fear and her hair falls in untidy curls over her shoulders.
It takes me a moment to recognize her, but when I do, a terrified noise escapes my mouth. I drop the book as if it burned me.
It's the twelve years old girl I reaped three years ago as female tribute for District 12.
She didn't make it past the Cornucopia. Twelve years old. She had all her life ahead. Innocent. Dead.
And it's all my fault.
oOo
The sun disappears behind the first Capitol buildings when Haymitch tramps out of his room. He wears a black suit and his hair is finally brushed properly. I let out a relieved sigh, we're already late enough. „You're late", I snap. The words sound more strident than intended. I clench my hands to fists so they won't tremble. I didn't fully come to terms with the shock from before, yet.
I'm wearing a knee-length dress, dyed in various shades of red. It even has some ruffles presented on my shoulders. Along with it, my golden wig which I teamed with a pair of golden high heels.
„Whatever, ready when you are", says Haymitch. The request in his voice is unmistakable.
Together, we walk to the elevators. The silence between us isn't that bad. Through it, I have enough time to collect my thoughts.
It doesn't take us long until we reach the neighboring Remake Center. Nevertheless, we come too late. Katniss and Peeta already took their marks, so we won't catch sight of them before the opening ceremonies begin.
The citizens' spirit seems to hit bottom. Most people are sobbing and crying, just giving vent to their emotions. Even in the Capitol they're people who don't recommend throwing former victors in the arena again.
There's still an awkward silence between Haymitch and I. I grab the chance to stuff the empty space with chatter. „It doesn't sit well with some citizen that former victors are going back to the arena", I try to mention as casually as possible, but I watch his reaction out of the corner of my eyes.
He screws up his face as if I said something disparaging. „Once the blood starts flowing they'll get over it", he says disgusted and crosses his arms.
It's no secret what Haymitch thinks about the Capitol and its citizen. I won't, I would have liked to reply but remain silent.
Because in this moment, District 12's chariot drives up. Peeta and Katniss look breathtaking. Katniss's hair was styled the same way as at last year's reaping. But otherwise as last year, her face is covered with make-up. Although the highlight is a raven-black dress which seems to be on fire. Peeta is suited in her style. They look straight ahead, seriously, and don't turn to the crowd.
„They look powerful", I whisper dignified. They look dangerous.
As they reach the City Circle, we leave to catch them in time.
„Effie!" A voice suddenly trills behind us. I would have recognized it everywhere.
„Octavius." My accent mixes into my voice again. We clasp into each other's arms. „It's been a long time."
Octavius, an early schoolfriend on my part and the son of a sometime acquaintance of my father's, gives me a genially smile. His hair is dyed dirty blonde -his real hair color is brown- and he wears a matching suit, yet fairly revealing. „I have no clue", he purrs and thinks about it. „Definitely much too long!"
We chat about irrelevances and he tells me that he's the new member of District 6's prep team. Because we're both involved, we don't have much time for chatter. When I turn around to Haymitch shortly afterwards, he already made off. Seeking, I look around the bottom level of the Remake Center and spot him on the other side of the hall. Next to him, his longstanding friend Chaff, his partner Seeder, and Katniss and Peeta.
I approach them and see how easy they all go around one another. Seeder embraces Katniss, Chaff gives her a smooch right on her mouth and then turns to Haymitch. His broad laughter can be heard across the whole bottom level. They're all in high spirits, without thinking about rules or manners. It's admirable how natural it comes to me. Just because I know them for so long.
Just now, I wanted to go over when it suddenly hits me that I maybe should give Haymitch his little reunion. I believe it's the best leaving them on their own, so they can interchange without ruffle or excitement.
Suddenly, Finnick comes into my mind. It doesn't take long until I spot him with his escort Lillian. I don't like her quite much, she's divorced from reality and arrogant, but Finnick knows how to keep her at bay. I walk over to him, beckoning to attract his attention. When he spots me in the crowd, his expression relaxes.
„Effie!" He sounds relieved. He bumps into my arms with a half grin and I struggle to keep myself on my feet. I chuckle to myself.
„What a day", I murmur scattered when I break away from him. I give Lillian a look whom she responds with a touch of irritation. She whispers an excuse and walks away.
Once we're alone I drop my facade. „I can't believe it. Can this be true?"
Finnick shakes his head preoccupied and his eyes hurry inattentive over the crowd. „Of course", he responds honestly. „They have us standing there where they wanted us. All potential dangers cleared away in one sweep. Really clever, but crazy. But also predictable to the previous happenings."
I try to absorb his words and lean backwards to look straight in his eyes. „Which previous happenings?"
„You mustn't know about it", he says certainly. „Haymitch is going to kill me if I tell you. Since the last games, he accounts everything for possible danger." Finnick and I are always honest with one another. I'm thankful for that, because Haymitch never tells me anything.
That Haymitch actually worries about something is new to me, but I remember his words at the Justice Building and understand what Finnick wants to express. „I won't tell him anything."
He sighing ruffles his hair. „There were uprisings. Not in Four yet but people talk about it. Speculations."
Not in Four yet. As if Finnick waited for the uprisings to spread. „That's horrible." And it is horrible. But totally senseless.
Something in his eyes flashes. After a while of silence he clears his throat. „Yeah..."
„How's Annie doing?", I eventually ask because I can't get the pictures out of my head. I know what she means to him. Haymitch and I have seen how hard he fought to get her out of that arena alive. We knew how that story goes.
„She's okay." That settles the matter. He needs time. I pat his arm and then excuse myself. Embittered, I slash myself a way through the crowd of victors, mentors and prep teams, almost running to the elevators before anybody else comes up with the idea of starting a conversation with me.
After the door finally closes behind me, I notice how surprised I really am. Uprisings. What does that mean for us? The others will take after me soon for dinner, which is why I can't let myself overwhelm by my emotions.
I'm already on my way to the dining room when another elevator arrives on the level. I freeze at Haymitch's sight. Did he follow me? Did he hear the conversation between Finnick and I? I can't quite hide my surprise. To be honest, I don't know at all what to do now. He confuses me.
„Where are you going?", he asks me and lightly raises his eyebrow. It lets him look absurd.
I just stare at him for a moment. When I realize that he waits for an answer, I think about something. Of course, I won't tell him the truth. My feelings and thoughts have nothing to do with anyone apart from myself at last.
„I wanted to avoid to be stuck in an elevator with ten other people. Especially considering that I have the longest way", I say. I know that he won't argue with me about that because it's a typical Capitol answer. And he hates the Capitol.
For a moment, we remain silent and watch each other. Then, Haymitch suddenly says something that totally takes me off guard. „Princess, you should chew on your pencil more often, it's a nice sight."
Utterly surprised, I open my mouth to respond something about his lacking manners, but I can't. My mind's still trying to parse his words. I pray that he's not seeing the burning cheeks under my make-up. Was that his usual mocking? Or was it possibly even a compliment?
Haymitch smirks and turns to the elevators where Katniss and Peeta just get off, looking very pleased with himself. Katniss looks annoyed by something. Now, that Haymitch turned his back on me, I can't hide the ghost of a smile. But then Haymitch suddenly stops dead in his tracks and I almost run into him. I come to his side and eye him concerned.
His expression has nothing in common with the one some seconds ago. A twinge of confusion flashes over his face. Then, it hardens. He stares at Katniss and doesn't even seem to notice me. Better that way, I guess.
Not until then I realize that he isn't staring at Katniss, but at something behind her. Or someone. Because when I take a step forward, I spot them. It's the redheaded Avox girl from last year. By her side, another Avox, also redheaded.
„Looks like they've got you a matched set this year", it slips out of my mouth, smiling so we can broach the subject. But I obviously miss the point. Haymitch glares at me, not even hiding his irritation. From his point of view, Avoxes shouldn't even exist. But I am from the Capitol and was raised to see the Avoxes as a part of our society. Even though they're actually nothing else but slaves. Slaves. The word describes the same but is, according to my opinion, much worse.
Haymitch bolts forward to Katniss, who is slowly approaching the two Avoxes, and grabs her arm to withhold her. God knows why he's making such a fuss. Katniss, who suddenly seems startled, tears away from Haymitch's grip and disappears in the direction of her room. Without acknowledging me another look, Haymitch beckons Peeta over and disappears with him.
I'm alone again. Both Avoxes are staring at me. Not angry but with a certain blame in their eyes. They're aware that I could punish them for it. A spate of shame settles in my stomach. While they look me, I suddenly get the feeling that I did something wrong. But I didn't.
oOo
Shortly afterwards, we get together for dinner. Cinna and Portia join us tonight. Last year, they've been the only reason Haymitch and I weren't at each other's throat. It's different this year. We chatter exuberantly about the opening ceremonies, maybe tattle a bit about some other costumes. I laugh a lot.
But obviously, not everyone is in a good mood. Katniss hasn't said a word and stares at her plate and from time to time to our new Avox who serves us tonight. And Haymitch drinks. Not much but it's enough to stop taking part in the conversation. He just comments every so often in his usual temper. I try not to bother.
I'm fully preoccupied in the conversation so I frighten all the more, when Katniss drops a bowl of peas to the floor. From the corner of my eye, I can see as she kneels down to gather up the peas. A moment later, the redheaded Avox boy kneels by her side and does his job. Precarious, I glance to Cinna and Portia. Seeing Katniss, who barely talked to us in days, getting into a tangle makes me furious.
„That isn't your job, Katniss!", I snap at her with an annoyed voice. She sits down in silence and starts to stare at her plate again, her lips pressed together into a thin line.
I turn around to face the others again and get a glare from Haymitch. But it doesn't put me out of my stride because he knows I'm right.
Shortly afterwards, we sit down together on the massive couch in front of the TV to watch the opening ceremonies' recap. I sit down between Portia and Haymitch. I quickly cross my legs and fold my hand in my lap. I can smell the liquor in Haymitch's hand and turn my head disgusted to Portia to chat with her.
When the recap is over, Katniss is the first on her feet and gives Cinna and Portia her praise for their great work. I'm really happy how her manners have improved since last year.
„Remember we meet tomorrow morning for breakfast at nine to discuss our training strategy", I remind the others and try to let my voice sound cheerful. But with the looks they're giving me, they haven't missed the regret.
We all know there won't be two victors this year. Anyway, the odds are bad enough. The other victors know each other all along. Plenty of them have been or still are mentors.
Haymitch and I will have to make an effort to make a good impression tomorrow, at the first meeting with the teams to obtain confidence. But in light of the facts I don't believe it's going to be that hard. Haymitch should know them all.
I go to sleep in time to be up and about again early tomorrow morning. I'm probably going to be the first one being awake, it was the same last year.
Once I turn the lights off, I fall to a sleep which won't give me a calm night.
What do you think?