Jiraiya has a discussion with Minato in the midst of their plans to oust Danzō.

Jiraiya has just finished having a rather nice dinner at Minato and Kushina's place when he decides on a whim to bring up the topic.

"So," he begins in a conversational tone. "Have the two of you made plans to start bringing any little ones into the world yet?"

The question was a lighthearted one, and Jiraiya had predicted he would receive a half-joking reply. What he doesn't expect is for Minato's entire form to stiffen as if he's been spotted by a deadly enemy. Nor does he expect for such a listless response to come from his student.

"No, there are no plans," Minato answers in a flat, hollow voice that rings with finality.

Behind Minato's back, Kushina gives Jiraiya a sad smile and shakes her head surreptitiously. Oh, I see.

The hint received, Jiraiya is preparing to change the topic completely when he sees a thoughtful look flash over Kushina's face. He's not entirely sure what she's considering, but she suddenly speaks up animatedly before he can do or say anything else.

"You know, I think I'm going to go visit Mikoto. She keeps telling me about how we should do something fun, and I think tonight will be a good time. So, I'll leave the two of you to it. Bye! "

A few seconds later, she's gone.

This leaves Jiraiya alone in the room with Minato who is pointedly not making eye contact with him. His former student looks shaken, more so than he can every remember seeing before. Then again, that's not saying much. He can barely remember a time when Minato wasn't self-assured, it was one of his defining traits. Either way, Jiraiya supposes it's up to him to break the silence. Judging by Minato's current expression, he seems content with never speaking again.

"This has to do with your students, doesn't it?"

Minato takes a deep breath, "I just don't deserve to have another person's life put in my hands, much less a helpless child's!" His voice, which had started off as barely audible, had risen to almost a shout by the end of the sentence.

Jiraiya raises his eyebrows. "Well you still have a family, don't you? Being married to Kushina and all."

His former student shakes his head wearily. "That's different. I mean, Kushina is my wife, yes. But she's still an independent person who can take care of herself. She's an incredibly skilled jōnin and the jinchūriki of the Nine Tails, so she hardly needs me to look after her.

Kushina doesn't actually need me for anything. But a child, a child is going to depend on me to care, nurture, and guide. I can't be trusted with those responsibilities. I thought I was doing so well with them before. And look how it turned out…"

At that, Minato slumps down onto a chair and buries his face in his hands.

"I just can't do it."

This is the most emotional Jiraiya has seen him since the war ended. Struck by a sudden revelation, he realizes there's a good chance that Minato hasn't even spoken to anyone about this in depth. Obviously, he had to have mentioned his misgivings about having children to Kushina beforehand. But he remembers Minato's terse answer to his joking question earlier. Those were certainly not the words of a man who has found closure.

Maybe, Jiraiya can convince Minato to talk this out with him. He'll have to do it extremely carefully. If he pokes too hard, Minato might shut down completely. But then again, being abrupt might encourage him to air out his feelings in a way he wouldn't have if he were calm.

"Minato, I understand that losing your students is an undeniably tragic-"

"I didn't just lose them, I might as well have cast them away myself!"

After the words leave his mouth, Minato's head snaps up to meet Jiraiya's eyes. His former student seems almost shocked by his own outburst, his eyes darting around the room as if he's planning his escape. But he shakes his head, more vigorously this time, and continues.

"I wasn't with them in the end when they all needed me the most. And… and you weren't there when I found them. I honestly think not seeing what happened to Obito was a mercy because there's no way I can ever forget seeing Rin and Kakashi like that. Not a day goes by where I'm not reminded of all the mistakes I made with the three of them."

It seems as if the floodgates have broken now because Minato doesn't seem to be capable of stopping himself from talking. Accordingly, Jiraiya decides it's best to let him speak uninterrupted for now. After all, there's a lot of things that Minato needs to get off of his chest.

"You know, when I found Rin and Kakashi, they were still holding each other's hands. And I had to break their hands and pry their fingers apart. It was the only way that we would've been able to seal them away into storage scrolls. Separating them from each other was incredibly difficult then, and that stuck in the back of my mind for a while. My knowledge of human anatomy isn't exactly comprehensive, but I still found that strange. Typically, the muscles in one's body don't start to significantly stiffen until around eight hours after death, and I didn't think the two of them had been out there for that long.

So, I looked it up.

Rigidity after death sets in much more quickly for children, or people with low muscle mass or little body fat. Physical exertion before death also accelerates the process. Evidence had suggested that Rin and Kakashi were surrounded by Kiri nin before the Three Tails broke free. Which means they were probably fighting and running for their lives then. They must have been exhausted. So that's why, though I don't know why I needed to know. It's not like finding all this out made any of it better. It's not like anything could make this better…"

In the dimming light of the room, Minato's eyes look almost wild with grief.

"And Obito, what was I thinking, sending you out there into a warzone? You didn't deserve that, none of you did."

Gone is the implacable Hokage from the council meeting who stood steadfast against all protests and shot down every heated argument raised against his reforms. Now Jiraiya just sees a devastated young man whose grief is still very much raw, one who detests himself so much that he can't even begin to mourn.

Jiraiya can tell that Minato is not ready to let go of his sorrow at this point in time. But maybe he can take the first step in convincing his former student that he isn't to blame.

"Can I say something?"

Minato doesn't outwardly respond, instead choosing to focus on his now shaking hands. But, Jiraiya knows him well enough to tell that he's listening.

"As a sensei, it's true that you hold responsibility for your students. But no one can predict the future. Obito, Rin, and Kakashi grew up during a war and understood the risks of being a shinobi then. And if you're second-guessing yourself and thinking that you should've taught them better, remember that they were still autonomous people. Ultimately, the paths and decisions they took are their own. What happened to them, while heartbreaking, is not on you."

Jiraiya hopes that even a fraction of his words will make it through to Minato who once again is holding his head in his hands.

"It wasn't your fault," he adds for emphasis.

Minato only looks at the ground.

"You think if I start telling myself that, I'll be able to believe it one day?"

Another exploration into Minato's mental state following the end of the war. Jiraiya's just hoping he can get him to ease up on the self-hatred.