And so, the next day, the group all went to the train station so they could begin their world tour adventure.
"I didn't know there was still third-class!" Waldorf remarked.
"Third-class?" asked Statler. "How about no class?"
And they chuckled to themselves as they went on their way.
"Oh, you two." Cherry rolled her eyes playfully.
"Watch the heel!" Miss Piggy glared at her attendant who rolled over her luggage as she walked forward with her precious dog.
"Piggy, why do you need so much luggage?" Kermit asked the diva pig.
"For our honeymoon, of course!" Miss Piggy replied.
"For our what?" Kermit asked with wide eyes.
But before that question could be answered, the train whistle was soon blown and that meant it was time to take a ride in the train.
"Come on, we better hurry!" Atticus told the others.
"No kidding!" Lionel exclaimed as he scrambled to get onboard. "We don't wanna be left behind, that's for sure!"
They soon got on the train together.
"Let's go, guys!" The conductor called out and the train began to go... Only it was going backwards. "That must be reverse. Oh, well." he then said.
"Off to a great start." Mo rolled her eyes a bit.
"Well, at least it's interesting!" Lionel shrugged as he settled in.
"Well, Dominic, I was thinking we could start off our tour in London." Kermit suggested.
"Actually, I was thinking we could start in the comedy capital: Berlin, Germany." replied Dominic.
"Germany?" Cherry and Atticus wondered.
The others soon cheered about going to Germany as they then pulled up into the Hauptbahnhof Station. Part of the train broke off once they came down the trail and ended up in Germany as Dominic suggested.
"Is not as nice as motherland, but is still nice." Jacob remarked.
"Uh, was that supposed to happen?" Walter asked as the train fell apart a bit.
"Oh... Pretty nice place..." Kermit muttered as he and the group walked around. "Here it is, gang: the Hole in the Wall club!"
Rowlf squinted to look at the sign. "'DIE MUPPETS'?" he read.
"Looks like they put the reviews up early!" Statler remarked.
"Or is that the suggestion box?" Waldorf replied, and they both laughed.
And so, the group went inside and saw that the place looked even worse than on the outside.
"'Hole in the Wall Club'?" asked Piggy. "More like 'Hole in the Ground Club'."
"Okay, everybody," declared Kermit. "So, we'll start at the bottom and work our way up. I've booked us into cabaret bars and coffee houses all across the industrial cities of Northern Germany. Dusseldorf, Hamburg, Mudburg, Vomitdorf..."
"Poopenburgen?" asked Fozzie.
"Fozzie, we have a solid week booked in Poopenburgen!" Kermit declared.
Lionel let off a snort.
"This is some country, am I right?" Atticus grimaced.
"I didn't say I wanted to come." Cherry smirked.
The others groaned a bit before they looked over at Dominic, Darcy, and Jacob.
"This looks great," Dominic remarked. "And I think we should commend Kermit on his efforts." he then began to applaud with Jacob and Darcy to prompt the other Muppets to join in, though only Gonzo seemed to.
"Thank you, Dominic," Kermit said from that. "Thanks."
"Or if we may be bold, maybe we consider another venue?" Darcy then spoke up.
"Another venue?" Cherry asked.
"To be precise, this other venue." Jacob remarked as they were soon outside and he gestured to a grand looking theater.
"What? No, no," Kermit panicked. "We don't have the money to rent the Berlin National Theatre!"
"We make money back when we sell out theater!" Jacob remarked.
"Kermie, I've always dreamed of playing the Berlin National Theatre," Miss Piggy stated. "Ich bin ein Berliner."
"More like 'ein frankfurter'!" Floyd Pepper chuckled.
"Watch it, buster..." Miss Piggy snapped.
"Guys, I'm not sure we can do this, you know?" Kermit asked.
"Okay, let us put this to vote," Darcy declared. "All those in favor of believing in selves, raise your hands."
The other Muppets raised their hands. "That's not what I'm saying..." Kermit tried to protest.
"And all those in favor of just giving up?" asked Dominic.
Kermit sighed, and slowly put his hand up. "I can't believe I'm voting for giving up..." he sighed.
"Good. Well, I'm glad we made this decision." Dominic replied, as in the background, a person clad in a red had and trenchcoat could be seen entering a museum via grappling hook.
Atticus glanced over as he thought he saw something.
"Well, we might as well get ready," Furrball said. "Two-Tone, you up for helping?"
"Hmm... I dunno if there's anything I could do," Two-Tone shrugged. "Should I care?"
"Maybe they'll need your help with some fashion?" Furrball smirked at the female Dalmatian.
Two-Tone suddenly looked entranced. "...Well, now that you mention it," she then smirked. "I suppose I could help out a bit, especially with Miss Piggy."
Furrball and Patch then shared a high-paw together with smirks at each other. Atticus then shrugged as he went to go off with the others, though Cleo narrowed her eyes a bit in the distance as she saw a mysterious person and began to get ready to go check that out for herself.
"It can't be Mama or Selina..." Cleo said to herself as she dashed off on her own.
Later, inside the theater, Kermit was gathered with the others.
"Since we're playing such a big theater, let's stick with what we know," Kermit explained. "We'll open with a cabaret number..."
"Kermit, when do I do the indoor running of the bulls?" asked Gonzo, glancing to a crate that was shaking like crazy.
"Mr. Kermit, sir?" asked Dr. Honeydew. "I would very much like to demonstrate my magnetic bomb-attractor vest." Nearby was Beaker, who was wearing said vest.
Kermit was pretty mortified. "...Bunsen, why would you even invent one of those?" he asked.
"Why did I invent the unexpectedly exploding cupcake?" countered Dr. Bunsen; Beaker took out the cupcake, which exploded.
"Hey, what about Muppet Ladder?" asked Gonzo.
"Muppet Ladder? That's never, ever worked, Gonzo," replied Kermit. "Last time we all tried that was 20 years ago and you ended up in a cast for six months!"
"Yeah, good times." sighed Gonzo.
"He okay?" Lionel asked.
"Gonzo sorta lives dangerously." Cherry replied.
"Kermit, what if I do four or five Celine Dion songs?" Miss Piggy suggested as she carried her dog. "You know Celine Dion, she works in Vegas."
"No, Piggy, there's no time for that." Kermit replied.
"What about the band's marathon jam session?"Floyd Pepper asked.
"DRUM SOLO! DRUM SOLO!" Animal beamed.
"No drum solo!" Kermit disapproved before everybody began to talk all at once.
Cherry covered her ears as the clamoring seemed to stress her out.
Atticus noticed that and soon shouted out, "QUIET!"
The Muppets were then quiet at that.
"Guys, guys, guys! We can't just do whatever we want. This is our opening night. Let's play to our strengths, because... Well..." Kermit then tried to explain. "Look, I didn't want to worry you guys but if we don't sell this theater out, it would mean the end of the tour."
"What?" The others asked in horror.
"And maybe the end of us." Kermit then added.
"No, don't say that!" Mo gasped. "We need the Muppets in our lives!"
"Well, I'm sorry, Mo, I'm just really concerned about this whole deal." Kermit replied.
Just then, Dominic came back inside. "Great news, Muppets! We're sold out!" he declared.
"What?" Kermit asked, as his voice was drowned out by the excited cheers of the crowd. "Fine. I mean, great, great. Well done, Dominic."
"Hey, I have an amazing idea for an act," Gonzo piped up. "It's called 'The Indoor Running of the Bulls'."
"Gonzo, I've told you, that act is far too dangerous." replied Kermit.
"Actually, Kermit, I was asking Dominic what he thinks." stated Gonzo.
"Mr. Bad-Gee, you can't tell me you're alright with that act." Atticus said as he sounded exasperated.
Dominic just grinned as the Muppets spouted out suggestions to him while Kermit began to walk away sadly that no one was really listening to him. Walter noticed that and decided that he should go and talk to the frog. Atticus, Cherry, Lionel, and Mo decided to go keep Kermit company as he was very depressed right now.
"'Sold out'. Like we've sold out a show in 30 years." Kermit huffed.
"Is this a good time to discuss our upcoming European wedding?" Miss Piggy asked Kermit as she came to see him.
"No, actually, I'm kind of busy right now." Kermit told her.
"Perfect!" Miss Piggy beamed. "You kiddies can help out and come to the wedding too. I have 23 swatches for the seat covers for the reception, which, by the way, we are not serving flies."
"Miss Piggy, please!" Cherry called. "What's this all about?"
"I'm just trying to involve you kids and Kermie in some of the decision-making, dear." Miss Piggy replied innocently.
"What about being involved in the decision to get married in the first place, huh?" asked Kermit.
"Kermit, you never let me do what I want!" Miss Piggy replied.
"Well, what about what I want? What about that?!" Kermit exclaimed. "I haven't even proposed yet!"
"Wow." Atticus said.
"Thanks for the sympathy." Cherry rolled her eyes at Atticus's reaction.
"You can do that on our honeymoon." Miss Piggy smiled innocently.
"What? That's insane!" Kermit replied. "Do you hear what you're saying?"
"Insane?" Miss Piggy glared. "How dare you call your fiancée insane!"
"You are not my fiancée! We are not engaged!" Kermit snapped. "And, as a matter of fact, the way this particular conversation is going right now... Well... I'M FINE WITH THAT!" he then finished with a haughty shout.
Piggy gasped, and then stormed out of the room, as her little dog, Foo-Foo, angrily barked at Kermit.
"Piggy, wait! I'm sorry!" Kermit called.
Lionel winced. "Good grief..." he remarked.
"Harsh," Atticus cringed. "Very, very harsh."
Foo-Foo soon barked at Dominic like she didn't trust the man before he shooed her away after her mistress. Jacob grumbled as he pushed the dog away and grunted in disgust as he came back to Dominic and Darcy.
"Oh, Kermit..." Cherry said softly.
Everybody else began to leave as Kermit seemed to be alone on the stage with a lot on his mind.
"Aw, poor Kermit," Angel frowned. "I wish that we could help."
"You and me both," Lionel replied. "But then again, Piggy WAS kinda jumping the gun there. Who proposes DURING a honeymoon?"
"Yeah, I'm not that mad at Kermit, but that outburst struck me a bit." Cherry nodded.
"Maybe we should give him some time alone," Mo suggested. "He's had a lot of pressure and Miss Piggy didn't make it any better."
"Yeah, let's take the animals for a walk." Atticus added.
Patch, Angel, and Two-Tone beamed about going out for a walk as they were pet dogs after all, so it was expected of them.
"Okay then, going out walking!" Lionel declared as they all headed out.
The group soon walked off to take their pets for a walk before Cherry soon noticed that Cleo was missing, but wasn't too worried as Cleo almost always made it back home to her before it would get too late in the night. Kermit sighed as he sat alone on the stage.
Dominic soon decided to sit down with him, as did Jacob and Darcy. "Don't take it personally. They still love you. They just prefer me now." he then told the sad frog.
"Thank you, Dominic," Kermit replied. "That's very comforting."
"Do you know what I think helps sometimes in situations like this?" Dominic asked.
"What?"
"A walk alone in the fog in former East Berlin."
"Yes," Jacob added. "Maybe along deserted canal."
"Well, I guess a quiet stroll is not a bad idea," Kermit said before he was given a map. "Let the others know I've gone, will you?" he then asked his three new friends.
"Oh, sure, we promise." Darcy replied.
"Would we let friend like you down?" Jacob added.
"Well, I just met you guys, but you seem trustworthy." Kermit said as he decided to go clear his head.
Little did Kermit know that he was walking into some serious trouble.
"...I don't know why, but I feel like Kermit is walking into some sort of danger." Lionel stated.
"What gave you that idea?" asked Mo.
"I read the previous line of text." Lionel replied.
"Oh... Well, I guess that would do it." Mo shrugged.
"You wanna go back for him?" Atticus asked Lionel.
"I guess we ought to, make sure nothing bad happens." Lionel replied.
The group looked at each other and went to go off after Kermit and Lionel. However, they were suddenly stopped.
"Halt!" A voice called.
Cherry froze in the air and got into a fighting pose just in case there was a threat. There were two kids: one was a redheaded girl and the other was a blonde boy.
"A moment of your time." The girl said to them.
"Sure," Lionel replied. "What's up?"
Cherry checked her watch anxiously as she wasn't sure if they had time for this.
"Good evening," The blonde boy replied. "My name is Zack and this is my sister Ivy."
"Good to meet ya." Atticus nodded.
"We work with ACME." Ivy then told them.
"The company that gives Wile E. Coyote his supplies against the Roadrunner?" Cherry couldn't help but ask.
"Different ACME." Zack and Ivy deadpanned.
"Oh, well, carry on, please." Mo then said to the siblings.
"We're detectives and we're looking for someone." Zack said.
"Yes, have you seen this woman?" Ivy added as she brought out a wanted poster of a woman with long and wavy dark brown hair with a red fedora hat on top of it which matched her red coat and black gloves on her hands.
"Hmm... Honestly, can't say we have," Lionel replied. "Pretty sure we'd notice if we did."
"...I feel like I have, but I'm not certain." Atticus said.
"Sorry we're not much help." Cherry shrugged.
"Oh, well, thank you for your time," Zack then said. "Be very careful if you do see her."
"Is she a criminal?" Mo asked.
"She's a Master Thief." Ivy informed.
"I see... Well, if we do, then we'll keep on our guard." Lionel replied. "Good luck to you two."
"Thank you," Ivy nodded. "We really appreciate it."
"Just remember not to trust Master Thieves." Zack added.
"Um... Yeah..." Cherry said bashfully as she thought about her distant aunt back in Gotham.
The siblings soon left as the group went back to what they were doing as Patch, Two-Tone, and Angel began to sniff around to track down Kermit's scent so they could find out where to go.
"You guys find anything?" asked Lionel.
"Sure, but the trail goes cold somewhere over here." Two-Tone replied.
"Damn!" remarked Lionel.
"You can't swear!" Angel gasped. "It's a Muppet movie! There shouldn't be adult topics in a Muppet movie!"
"Try telling that to Muppets' Wizard of Oz." Cherry deadpanned.
"...I'm not sure I wanna now." Angel slanted her eyes.
"You don't," Lionel replied. "Besides, this is rated PG. We may as well make sure the rating is earned. Besides, it's a minor swear. No need to fuss over it."
"Hmm... Okay." Angel said.
"The trail's gone cold," Atticus sighed. "Now what?"
"You wanna try to fly around?" Cherry suggested.
"I guess I could try that." Atticus shrugged before he jumped up in the air in flight and soon flew around in a Superman fashion to look around for Kermit with his telescopic vision.
"Maybe we can blow the fog away?" Lionel suggested. "Could be tough; there's a lot of it."
Cherry nodded before calling out. "Yo! Superdork!"
Atticus looked down as he stopped while in the air.
"Come back!" Cherry told him. "We're gonna try to blow the fog away!"
"Ah, right!" Atticus nodded before he soon flew back down.
"Alright, gang. Ready?" Lionel asked when Atticus came down to the ground.
"Ready!" The group replied.
"Deep breaths... And blow!" Lionel advised.
"Like blowing out a birthday candle." Atticus added.
"Or your last birthday where the cake went flying." Cherry teased.
"Hm." Atticus glanced at her.
And so, the groups got ready to take deep breaths and soon all blew the fog away together as strongly as they could. A frog soon came out to see them.
"Kermit!" Patch beamed. "We found you!"
"Thank goodness." Furrball added.
"Hi-lo, it is, uh, good to see you!" The frog replied, sounding different.
"What happened to your voice?" Mo asked.
"Oh, uh, I believe I have caught a cold," The frog replied. "That is all, no reason to be suspicious in any way."
"Well, okay, as long as there's no reason to be suspicious." Cherry replied, though in a bit of a sarcastic tone.
"I think we're too late," Lionel muttered. "Anyways, we'd better get back to the theatre! The other Muppets will be waiting on you, even though Piggy is rather perturbed." he added, out loud.
"Let us go then." The frog suggested.
The group soon went back to the theater with the frog that was very unlikely to be Kermit.
The Muppets were all scattered around as they went to get themselves ready.
"Has anyone seen Kermit?" Scooter asked the other Muppets. "It's 15 minutes to curtain!"
"Hi, guys!" Dominic said as he arrived in a white suit with Jacob in the same while Darcy wore a black dress with a white pearl necklace. "Look, it's Kermit back from his afternoon stroll!"
"Hi-lo! I am Kermit." said the amphibian, who did not sound a thing like Kermit.
"If he's Kermit, then I'm Mark Hamill," Lionel retorted. "...And I'm not!"
"He is just having cold, is all!" Jacob stated, as the Kermit-lookalike gave a few coughs.
"You are right. Dominic is terrific!" The frog replied. "From now on, let's do whatever he says."
"Wow, that walk must have really helped!" Fozzie piped up, as the other Muppets nodded in agreement.
"Miss Pig, I have wronged you," The frog soon said to Miss Piggy as she looked at him. "I humbly beg your forgiveness."
"You're not getting off that easy, bucko," Miss Piggy huffed. "Come on, Foo-Foo."
Foo-Foo huffed like her mistress before going off with her.
Animal soon sniffed the frog before yelling out. "Bad frog! Bad frog!" he then cried before biting the frog on the arm.
"What is this? Let go, dog!" The frog cried out as Floyd Pepper tried to stop Animal.
"Animal, stop it!" Floyd scolded the savage Muppet. "Kermit has agreed that Dominic is right all the time, man."
Animal then stopped and began to calm down.
"Good. So, now that Kermit agrees with me on everything..." Dominic then said.
"I am Kermit." The frog nodded.
"Definitely. Let us go and hang out backstage, yeah?" Jacob then suggested.
The other Muppets soon agreed as they went to get going.
"I think amateur Detective Fudo needs to do some work." Atticus said to his friends.
"Sounds good to me." Lionel replied.
Atticus nodded as he got himself prepared as he was always an aspiring detective, especially on adventures like this.
"Okay, all right. Come, little friend," Kermit soon said to Walter. "Let us get on with the show and enjoy our family-style adventure during which we shall bond and learn heartwarming lesson. Perhaps about sharing, or waiting your turn, or the number three."
"Right, Kermit. Sure." Walter nodded.
"The number three..." Mo repeated with an eye roll.
"Guess he thinks this is still Sesame Street." Cherry replied.
A notification block soon came up at that comment: "Do a Cherry's Adventures of Sesame Street."
"Crap, I just had to say it." Cherry complained.
Lionel sprayed the notification block with bug spray, and it coughed, keeled over, and died. "Hate those things..." he muttered.
"We'll play along with this new Kermit for now until we find out what really happened." Atticus suggested.
"Sounds good to me." Cherry agreed, as did Mo and Lionel.
The Muppets soon went to get themselves ready, though Miss Piggy was still mad at Kermit due to the argument they had earlier.
"Flawlessly executed," congratulated Dominic. "Bravo."
"What did you expect from world's most dangerous frog and number one criminal, Number Two?" asked the frog.
"Criminal? Dangerous frog?" asked Furrball, muttering. "I better go tell the others..."
Darcy and Jacob soon blocked Furrball's way.
"Uh-oh." Furrball said as he saw them.
"Going somewhere, Little Pussycat?" Jacob smirked at the dark blue cat.
"You're not gonna stop me!" Furrball glared as he looked ready to fight them.
"Pussycat talks a big game," Darcy smirked as she soon grabbed Furrball by the scruff of his neck. "Maybe if you were bigger, you would make a lovely fur boa."
Furrball hissed, and clawed at the woman, causing her to drop him in shock and giving him the opportunity to run off.
"Oh, there you are, Furrball!" Lionel exclaimed, picking him up. "Real cool of you to find my cat for me!"
"Um, yes! We are as cool as London snow, yes!" Jacob replied sheepishly.
"Very much, yes!" Darcy added.
Furrball glared as he got comfortable in Lionel's arms. Lionel soon walked away before Furrball shared a wink with his owner as they left the evil group alone together.
"You two need to be more careful," Dominic warned Jacob and Darcy. "I see stealth isn't your thing."
"We do best, especially with Fearless Leader." Jacob remarked.
"So whatcha find out?" Lionel whispered.
"Something about that phony Kermit," Furrball replied. "We better check the internet for some info."
Lionel nodded.
"Are they gone?" Dominic asked.
Jacob and Darcy nodded.
"Excellent," Dominic replied. "They might be clever, but we are more clever. Especially you two as you were highly recommended by Fearless Leader himself. Even though those children with the Muppets don't seem to be your usual targets. I believe he mentioned something about you two going after a flying rat and an imbecile yak." he then said.
"Actually, it is Moose and Squirrel," Jacob said as his Russian accent thickened, making it obvious he was someone else. "Those children were teamed up with Moose and Squirrel and defeated us in the Rocky & Bullwinkle story!"
"It was most annoying." Darcy added as she was shown to be someone else as well as her male partner.
And, as if you didn't know already, Jacob and Darcy are really... Boris and Natasha! Seriously, you'd have to be a supreme moron to not recognize them! The villains soon broke into a Villain Song Dance Number together which I don't really feel like getting into, so we cut to the end of it with the Kermit wannabe on Dominic's head before Boris and Natasha turned away and put their disguises back on as they heard a knock at the door.
"15 seconds to curtain!" Scooter called out as he came to the door before seeing what happened in the room. "...Kermit?"
"Sure." Dominic replied.
"Uh... Okay!" Scooter said before he shut the door behind him and went to prepare.
"Have you studied your Kermit tapes yet?" Dominic asked the frog when they were alone.
"Of course not," The frog replied as he hopped off of the man's head. "This is child's play for frog of my talent."
"This will go so well... I am being sarcastic." Boris grumbled.