Chapter 2: A Second Chance
Olivia gasped for breath and opened up her eyes, and was staring up at a circle of lights, which brightly shone in her face. Her vision adjusted to her surroundings and could see a woman in surgical scrubs, who placed her hand on her forehead.
„She's come to, she's alive," said the surgeon, looking at her colleague.
„Thank goodness, we'll get her transferred to a ward," said a male voice.
Olivia's lips were dry and she struggled to breath normally because her throat was so dry and sore. She moved her head to see more people in scrubs surrounding her, showing signs of relief that they saved a patient.
The female surgeon looked back at Olivia, shone a torch in her eyes and asked, „Are you okay? Can you speak? What is your name?"
„Olivia," croaked Olivia.
„Olivia, everything is going to be okay, we'll get you to a ward and we'll tell your friends the good news."
Olivia was transferred to a ward where she was veiled from other patients and hospital staff by curtains. She was left alone to recover and pondered about what she did and what was to follow. Looking down at her arm, she saw the tightly well dressed bandage on her entire left forearm, and thought back to her suicide attempt. She could remember dragging a razor sharp blade down her arm, it did hurt, but it wasn't what scared her the most. It was how she saw her skin open up and a large spurt of blood shot out, and her entire arm was oozing blood. Eventually she lost conscious, and before she could change her mind, she collapsed on the bathroom floor.
Olivia ruminated back to all the fun times she had with her friends, whom she lived and shared the apartment with, and how they were going to confront her about her selfish act to take her own life. She broke down and cried with regret, knowing she hurt her friends and they would disapprove with what she did. From that moment on, Olivia was grateful to be alive and was ready to face the consequences with her friends.
Olivia received her first visit from Isabel and Gustavo, who hugged her the moment they found her sitting up in her hospital bed. She felt alive again and the love she thought she would never have again, ever since Marina became close with Laura and Isabel too.
„Why did you do it Liv, why?" asked Isabel, begging for an answer.
„Isabel, I was so lonely. I couldn't take it anymore. I felt I didn't matter to you and Laura anymore," answered Olivia tearfully.
„Oh Liv, of course you matter to us, why would you ever assume you didn't?" asked Isabel, sounding baffled.
„Marina… she… everything changed when she came in. Laura was spending more time with her and so were you. I always felt left out while I saw you two together and when I saw her with Laura," sobbed Olivia.
„Oh Liv, why didn't you just tell us how you were feeling? We would have let you join in," preplexed Isabel.
„I guess it's because I wasn't ready to trust Marina. I thought there was something deceitful and dodgy about her," disclosed Olivia, then there was a short pause and a suspicious look on Isabel's face. „No that's not the truth entirely," huffed Olivia while looking down, „I was jealous of her, and I wanted to control that emotion. Okay and I wanted to sabotage Laura and Marina's relationship, but now part of me feels guilty about wanting to do that. I was happy being Laura's friend and us having fun times together, and here I was trying to take away not only Laura's happiness, but also Marina's. Marina spent her time suffering from loneliness, and here I was trying to rain on her parade. I feel like such a cunt."
„No Liv, you had reasons to feel what you felt, and you did the right thing by backing away from Marina to control your anger. But some point, you're going to have to accept those changes and accept the way things are. We will do the best we can to maintain this friendship and please you, but if you try anything like this again and hurt us, we are going to have problems with our friendship," scolded Isabel firmly.
„Oh Isabel, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me, please never leave me. I'll change, I promise I will change," cried Olivia, burying her face in her hands.
Isabel hugged Olivia again. „It's okay Liv, I forgive you. Gus and I are going to get you the help and support you need," soothed Isabel.
Olivia was unnerved when she learnt from Isabel that Laura was on her way after being informed about the suicide attempt. Never has she felt so nervous, even the time when she took her driving test and worried about failing. Her heart was pounding when she was left alone behind the closed curtains, knowing that Laura would inevitably show up. It was mainly the way Laura would act that concerned Olivia, seeing her in the state she was in.
The curtain drew open and there stood a doctor who humbly requested, „Sorry you two, but Olivia is going to need some time alone."
„Can't we stay for a few more minutes?" requested Isabel.
„No, Olivia needs to answer some questions. Kind of confidential if you can understand."
„Okay," agreed Isabel.
„If you could remain in the waiting room that would be great."
The doctor pointed the direction with his arm.
Isabel hugged Olivia and whispered into her ear, „We'll be back soon Liv, I promise."
Isabel kissed Olivia on the forehead and left the ward with Gustavo.
Olivia watched Isabel and Gustavo leave until the doctor closed the curtains and proceeded to ask Olivia some questions, regarding what happened. Without any hesitations or making alibis, Olivia told the doctor she attempted suicide. This did take the doctor aback, but he kept a straight face and proceeded to the next question. She answered every question truthfully and cooperatively.
The questioning didn't take long, the doctor then said he would refer Olivia to a therapist and a suicide support group. He then allowed Olivia to rest, but that didn't stop her from feeling lonely. Being confined by a wall of blue curtains and laying in a hospital bed. All she could hear were footsteps and chatter from hospital staff and patients. This wasn't enough to abate her boredom and loneliness, she started to ache in her bones and shiver. That all changed when the curtains drew open and she saw who she wanted to see, it was Laura.
„Liv," lamented Laura, approaching Olivia with tears rolling down her face.
„Laura," sniffed Olivia.
„Why did you do it Liv? We love you," asked Laura, hugging Olivia, who remained motionless and enervated from bedrest.
„I feel so alone, why haven't I found love? You and Isabel have found love, and I'm all alone," wailed Olivia, burying her face in her hands.
„Liv, Liv, Liv please stop it," implored Laura, taking Olivia's hands away from her face and drying her face with a tissue. „You're very beautiful, you have a beautiful face and a beautiful body," complimented Laura, which made Olivia smile and giggle. „See there's a smile," laughed Laura, pointing at Olivia's face, „Come here." Laura gave Olivia another hug and kissed her on the forehead and kept her face close to hers.
„Laura may I?" begged Olivia, placing her hands on Laura's face.
Laura frowned feeling confused what Olivia was demanding and permitted ardently, „Liv, whatever will make you happy."
Olivia spontaneously threw her lips on Laura's and passionately kissed her, feeling a strong sense of love for her close friend.
„Thank you for letting me do that, I know you are with Marina, but thank you for letting me kiss you. I just needed to feel love," thanked Olivia gracefully.
„You're welcome Liv, I'm happy I made you feel loved again," smiled Laura placing a hand on Olivia's face.
„Can I see Marina?" requested Olivia.
„Sure, I'll get her now," agreed Laura, as she went to fetch Marina. She shortly returned with Marina by her side, who expressed shock seeing Olivia in the state she was in.
„Hey Liv, you wanted to see me?" wondered Marina, slowly advancing towards Olivia and sitting on the stool beside her.
„I do, I just wanted to tell you that I'm happy to be alive. I'm happy that you make Laura happy, and most of all, I'm happy you are happy," confessed Olivia holding Marina's hand.
„Thank you Olivia, I'm sorry you are going through a rough time, but I'm glad you're feeling better now," comforted Marina.
„It's okay Marina, I guess we all have low points in our lives, until we realize that life truly is worth living," understood Olivia, as Marina smiled hearing Olivia's wise words. Olivia turned her attention to Laura who was standing by the curtains, as she asked, „Laura, is it okay if I… you know?"
Laura hesitated trying to to figure out what Olivia was requesting, but then got the idea and slightly opened her mouth, smiled and permitted, „Sure, as long as Marina is okay with it."
Marina looked confused too. Olivia stroked Marina's face and asked, „Is it okay to kiss you?"
Without hesitation or unease, Marina smiled and consented, „Sure." Olivia then indulged herself to kiss another pair of lips and had her hands on Marina's face. When their lips parted, Marina then kissed Olivia on the head, took her hand and let it slide off hers and drew back to Laura's side.
Laura raised her eyebrows and remembered the envelope Isabel gave her. „Oh I almost forgot," remembered Laura, as she pulled out the red envelope and handed it to Olivia, „Isabel instructed me to give this to you."
Olivia took the red envelope, and saw her name in neat bold writing on the front of the envelope. She happily opened the envelope, and pulled out what looked like a Valentine's Day card.
„Oh you got a Valentine's Day card from someone. See, someone loves you. Who's it from?" questioned Laura, as Olivia looked up only after briefly reading the contents and identifying the sender.
„It's that guy, the one who fancies me," disclosed Olivia.
„Oh yeah, it's the one who's half British and has a sense of humor, also does impressions and magic tricks," recalled Laura.
„Yeah that's him, I don't know, he's kind of a bit too odd for me," doubted Olivia.
„But he's also kind of cute, even if he's a bit odd, he's just trying to impress you because he likes you," implied Laura.
„Yeah, I mean I was a bit odd when I tried to approach Laura," interjected Marina.
„You weren't odd sweetie, you were just a little too intense," objected Laura, hugging Marina with one arm and kissing her head.
„I'm still unsure, I'm not really into nerds," hesitated Olivia
„Maybe you should just give him a chance, I gave Marina a chance and then we got into a relationship, and we both found love," advised Laura, „I know he might be awkward, but I'm sure he has a big heart, and would do so much for you."
„I'll think about it," smiled Olivia, dropping the card on her lap.
„Good to know you are opening your heart to him, maybe all you need is to give dating a try. You never know, you might find happiness with him," encouraged Laura.
„Well Gus is a bit of a clown too, but he has a good heart," remarked Olivia.
„Take all the time you need to think about it, but in the meantime, you need to recover and get back on your feet," encouraged Laura stroking Olivia's hair.
„I will do that," agreed Olivia, smiling determinedly.
„Good," elated Laura, as she and Marina approached and both hugged her.
As Laura and Marina left the ward, Marina turned back to look at Olivia and quoted, „Shine On You Crazy Diamond." Olivia frowned, but then smiled finding Marina's witty remark funny.
Once Laura and Marina were gone and Olivia was left alone, she felt so content and enlivened, feeling appreciated and valued by her friends. She was truly having an appetite for life again. She looked at the red envelope she held in her hand and decided to open it. Pulling out what she expected a Valentine's Day card, she looked at the front cover with embossing imagery and text in joined writing. She smiled at the amorous and cute looking cover which was two teddy bears hugging with a flurry of pink hearts floating above them. The text read „For someone special". This endearing text made Olivia smile.
Olivia slowly opened up the card and saw romantic text in joined writing which read, „Always thinking of you. My inspiration and the light in my soul." Below the text was a heart with an embossed outline and in the middle of the heart, Olivia could see her name. Below the heart was more text which read, „love from your admirer" and below signed the name Olivia was familiar with „Jeremy."
This romantic declaration really awed Olivia and touched her heart, she had only one thing in mind and that was to hug Jeremy and say thank you. However, upon mulling over that name and knowing more about Jeremy as a person, Olivia had second thoughts.
To be continued…