One day, Kotoha's life completely changed. It wasn't the day when she got married to her husband, nor the day when she gave birth to her precious boy, Inosuke. No, it was when he arrived.
Out of all her hazy memories, that particular one had remained crystal clear. A soft voice and a fleeting gentle touch woke her up from her slumber in the cold winter night. She had only left her house for a few moments, to go lie in the snow and numb the wounds from her husband's last outburst. But as her senses dulled in the welcoming sea of white, she lost track of time.
"My poor child, what are you doing here all alone?"
That faint voice had brought Kotoha back from the deadly sleep, but she could barely open her heavy eyelids. Night had already engulfed the surroundings and she could no longer feel her limbs from the cold. Yet she didn't feel afraid in the slightest. In fact, she didn't feel anything at all. There was a serenity surrounding her spirit as she witnessed two glowing purple orbs levitate above her. They were so beautiful, bright as the moon adorning the night sky.
"I will help you."
Only when a gentle arm supported the woman's back and lifted her, did she realize a thick blanket of snow already covered most of her battered body.
"You've endured so much already, my sweet child. I will bestow upon you my gift of life. You will no longer suffer at the hand of the weak or be enslaved by time. Your existence will be above all."
Then everything burned. Her whole body felt like it had spontaneously succumbed to a consuming flame. Hundreds of needles sunk into her skin and a loud sharp buzzing almost burst her eardrums. She could smell blood and dirt, pungent and repugnant. Where did it come from?
"So loud! What is happening?"
Only after the foreign voice screamed did Kotoha realize that it actually belonged to her. It had an uncanny resemblance, but her timbre was definitely not the same. She could hear every little fluctuation and pitch change, something that she had not been aware of before.
"The shock will soon pass. You are safe, my beloved child."
When he gently brushed his fingers over her forehead, Kotoha felt as if her every cell responded to the caress.
"It burns so bad!" She cried as she grasped his hand tightly and tears began to paint her checks.
"Your blood is fusing with mine. Give it just a little longer. The pain will soon fade and you will be healed."
The night was no longer a curtain of darkness. She could see crystal clear each snowflake adorning the frozen branches like specks of sand.
The fingers moved from her forehead and settled to brush her hair kindly. Amidst her panic, the constant touch brought some sort of comfort. She slowed her breathing down and tried to empty her overwhelmed mind.
"My name is Ubuyashiki Kagaya. You are now part of my family." He had a serene expression on his pale face, framed by black hair.
A sudden burst of happiness took Kotoha by surprise. Why was she feeling suddenly so... content? So safe? The woman stared into those purple cat-like pupils but they only further sent warmth and tenderness.
"You will be safe by my side, child. But until then, you must leave behind your old life."
"My old life...?"
She couldn't remember what she was doing before waking up from the slumber. Did she even have a home? Kotoha frowned as she tried to recall anything, but it was as if a mist had washed over her. She felt there was something left, but she couldn't put her finger on what was it.
"Your memory is hazy, but perhaps your heart might still guide you back to your family."
Return to your home and make amends with your old life.
Ubuyashiki did not utter a single word, yet her mind was invaded by loud echoes of those whispers. And from her very core, she felt compelled to obey.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
Not far away from her, there was a small wooden house with a thatched roof. The light coming from the window drew Kotoha's attention like a moth to a flame. Something inside told her to pay a visit to the tranquil place. She turned her head reluctantly to seek guidance from Ubuyashiki, but he was nowhere to be found. The woman could see the marks in the snow where he had kneeled to embrace her, but there was no trail left from him leaving. He seemed to have dissipated into thin air akin to a specter. If only she didn't have the painful sensations burned into her memory, Kotoha could have mistaken everything that occurred for a dream.
Return to your home and make amends with your old life.
She didn't want to disappoint her new family. No matter what it took to resolve her issues, she would try. So the young woman began the trek through the thick snow. It already reached past her calves and every step forward presented a battle of its own. Nonetheless, despite being barefoot, Kotoha didn't feel cold nor pain. She managed to walk up to the door without breaking a sweat. It unsettled her deeply to be gifted with such strength and health. She had been reborn indeed.
Kotoha stopped in front of the old door and lightly brushed her hand against it. Familiar scents invaded her senses and brought forth numerous emotions hidden inside. There was a soothing smell of food that made Kotoha realize that she had probably tasted that dish before. Ash and burnt wood reminded her of the cold winter months that seemed to get harsher and harsher as time moved on, while the pungent smell of leather and fur kept her warm no matter how vicious the wind blew.
Suddenly the woman was brought back from her thoughts as heavy footsteps got closer and closer. Her new sharp sense of hearing made them so loud and ominous that Kotoha braced herself the moment the door opened. It revealed a young man with broad shoulders and a stout frame that towered over Kotoha. His brows shot up as his somewhat handsome face contorted into surprise.
"Thank God you are back! We've been looking everywhere for you!"
The moment he put a calloused hand on Kotoha's shoulder, she flinched on instinct. She couldn't recall who was the person in front of her but anxiety still overtook her.
"You've looked for me?" Kotoha finally mumbled as she turned her head in the direction she came from.
Even without sharp eyes as hers, the spot where she had fallen asleep was without a doubt visible. What's more, judging by the clearing of trees, she had fallen asleep in a garden, perhaps the one belonging to this man.
"Of course. We've been so worried for you! Especially mother!"
Mother?
No matter how hard she focused, it didn't ring any bells. Meanwhile, the man stepped aside to make room for her. When he saw the glimmer of reluctance in her eyes, he coughed awkwardly.
"I'm so sorry about what happened earlier! I should have listened to you from the beginning! Please come inside to get warm! Don't you want to see Inosuke? He's been crying a lot for you!"
When he spoke that name, a flashing image appeared in Kotoha's mind. It was somewhat grainy, but she couldn't be mistaken that she saw herself holding a small baby in her arms. Why else would she embrace him so tightly if he wasn't somewhat precious to her? Kotoha was intrigued. She had to see Inosuke. Perhaps he could be tied to the old life that she needed to sort out before she joined Ubuyashiki.
"Yuhei! The cold will get inside! Close the door quickly!"
That awful raspy voice sent a shiver down Kotoha's spine. Her brows furrowed as dread started to bubble in the pit of her stomach. A hunched old woman slowly walked next to that man, Yuhei. As she sized Kotoha up, her expression contorted into disdain.
"So you finally decide to come back, huh? You have some guts! Leaving Inosuke in my care while you go stroll in the garden! Aren't you ashamed of yourself? You will send me to the grave!"
She continued to spill poison out of her mouth as Yuhei tried to calm her. Kotoha went quickly through multiple emotions, ranging from confusion and guilt, up to boredom and disdain. Who was this awful old hag anyway?
"Where is Inosuke?" Kotoha asked absent-mindedly as she slipped past them into the house.
"He is sleeping. FINALLY! Anyway, come have something warm to eat!"
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
No matter how much rice she tried to stuff in her small body, her hunger could not be sated away. She drank cup after cup of boiled water yet the consuming thirst only grew stronger and stronger. As she chewed the morsel of food, her eyes were drawn to Yuhei. He sat in front of her, at the low table, and seemed lost in thoughts. It arose a sense of familiarity in her. Perhaps he had seen him like this too, in the past. Eventually, Yuhei frowned deeply and sat down the rice bowl.
"Your skin…"
Kotoha rose her hand at his eye level and she turned it slowly while scrutinizing every inch of it.
"Is there anything wrong with my skin?" She asked while she touched her milky white wrist.
"Nothing. There is nothing-"
Kotoha lifted her eyebrows in confusion while the man continued to stare at her with an awestruck expression.
"There is nothing on your arms. Where are your scars and wounds?"
Oh…!
The woman blinked for a few seconds trying to gather her thoughts. Of course it would raise suspicions. She had been surprised by that too.
"I-I think someone healed them for me...In the garden! I met a young man who took care of my wounds!"
Just recalling Ubuyashiki's mesmerizing eyes brought a fond smile on Kotoha's face. Where was he right now? Was he helping another lost soul?
Does he have faith in me that I can do it? I want to repay his kindness.
Kotoha didn't know what to expect from Yuhei after she gave her answer, but certainly, she didn't foresee him getting so tense. She could hear the beats of his heart getting faster while he clenched his fists.
"A man? Is he still in the garden!?"
"I don't think so... He disappeared soon after we exchanged a few words."
"So instead of taking care of your sick son, you go out to flirt with men! Shameless!" That old woman spat as she shoved some dirty dishes into Kotoha's hands. "Go clean them!"
"B-but it wasn't like that! He only took care of my wounds and asked about my wellbeing! A-and what are you doing? I'm not done eating yet. I am still hungry."
"You are not done eating? You ate almost everything on the table like a pig. There are more people in this family other than you, you ungrateful wench!"
Kotoha was speechless. She looked in Yuhei's direction for help, but she met no sympathy there.
"Who was that man?" He muttered under his breath as he looked at his clenched fists.
"Yuhei!"
She tried in vain. When he finally lifted his eyes to meet hers, they were filled with contempt.
"He must have seen your wounds and run away to sell me off at the neighbors. You know what they will do to me!? My reputation will be ruined! Nobody will hire me anymore!"
The man that seemed so calm and warm in the beginning, completely changed before Kotoha's eyes into a tense mess that put her on edge. How could he turn into, basically, another man that quickly? Not long ago he was singing words of love into Kotoha's ear.
"Who is going to bring food on the table now!? It is all your fault!" His mother wailed as she pointed a finger at her.
"W-wait. That's not true. Please calm down..."
"Who is going to take care of Inosuke!?"
She felt overwhelmed. Shoutings and screeches made her head ready to burst. In a desperate plea for help, she brought her palms to her ears to cover herself, when a quick action caught her attention. It felt as if time itself slowed down before Kotoha. She blinked in shock while she witnessed a hand move towards her. It belonged to the old woman who almost had an animalistic rage on her face.
Why are they punishing me? I didn't do anything!
Yuhei also moved, but instead of helping her, he crossed his arms and looked outside the window.
Why are you ignoring this? What if I get hurt?
She called for him but it fell to deaf ears.
Don't I mean anything to you?
Kotoha was tired. She couldn't take it anymore. Just before the hand could reach her, she moved from her spot using her improved reflexes. The old woman hit her hand sharply on the table while a screech erupted from her throat similar to a wounded animal.
But something happened. Something that stopped Kotoha from running outside. She froze in place while inhaling deeply.
What's this?
A sweet scent filled the room. Her mouth started to water. Her pupils dilated while she felt her whole body tense and tremble from the very core of every cell.
. .
The old woman continued to weep as Yuhei ran to her and looked at her bloody hand. It was filled with broken glass from a shattered cup.
Would you have hit me with that force too?
Her body moved as if it had a mind of its own, and in an instant, she was next to them.
That was the last thing she remembered clearly from that night. She didn't even recall how she ended up holding Inosuke in her arms. But the moment they met, she had a new mission. To protect her son from whatever fate wanted to throw at them. She often wondered, while holding her precious boy, what exactly happened to his father. Did he manage to run and abandon them? When she regained her senses, there was nothing left in that room. She was alone. Everything after that was foggy and it gave her headaches when she dwelled on it too much. But of one thing she was sure of. On that night, she grabbed Inosuke and fled into the cold world. At last, she wasn't hungry anymore.