Chapter 1: The Morning After

"Illusions, of course, are by their nature sweet"

– Marquise de Merteuil, Dangerous Liaisons

~ 7 Weeks Later ~

This wasn't the first time Sebastian had passed out in Central Park. It wasn't even the second. At least this time he had a proper excuse. And he was wearing pants.

This came as small comfort to him when he arose to the sound of someone taking a piss beside him. Blurry eyed, Sebastian looked up to find a homeless man relieving himself dangerously close to his head. Suddenly alert, he jerked back violently to avoid the spray.

"Morning!" the man cheerfully greeted him with a toothless smile.

"Jesus Christ."

Falling asleep on the rock formation that bordered Central Park West was most definitely one of his more idiotic decisions. And that was saying something given recent events. Sebastian's body immediately reacted in protest at he hopped off the ledge, his knees nearly giving out on the way down. He rolled his shoulders trying to dislodge the knots, but it was no use. He was going to need a good two hours with his masseuse to remove them.

Rubbing the sleep off his face he took in his surroundings. It was a typical Monday on the Upper West Side. Gridlock up by the museum, nannies with strollers hurriedly pushing their charges to baby yoga or whatever, little old ladies walking their tiny dogs. Sebastian took it all in with dead, emotionless eyes, his foggy brain trying to remember what he was doing there. It only took one glance at the apartment building across the street and it all came back to him.

Annette.

God, he had really made a mess of things. True, that was sort of his raison d'etre, but he had really out done himself this time. What he had done to Annette was beyond fucked up and he wasn't all together sure there was any undoing it.

Last night as he watched her building, hoping to see a peak of her from her window like some perv stalker, Sebastian fantasized about what he would say to her if she ever agreed to talk to him again. He knew if Annette would just give him a few minutes he could make her see that they were meant to be together.

Which yes, is realized was basically the stalker motto.

Sebastian wondered if he had miscalculated giving her his journal. In hindsight he recognized it as a rather impulsive decision brought on not only by his desire to win Annette back, but also to stick it the bitch who brought him to his knees. It seemed romantic and honest and shit, didn't girls like that kind of thing? But now, as he ruminated on it, perhaps it was a little too honest. Maybe he should have toned it down a little or cut out some of his more colorful escapades. She didn't need to know about the shit he pulled on that duchess or the specifics of what he did to the school nurse or all the many depraved ways he wanted to defile his stepsister. Thinking back on it he probably looked like some sort of psychopath.

Not exactly the things dreams are made of.

"Shit." Sebastian ran a frustrated hand through his hair. Yeah, he definitely fucked this up.

To top it off he was a damn mess. His Tom Ford frock coat was filthy thanks to his all too convincing impression of a homeless person he'd performed last night and he was in desperate need of a shower. He considered walking home only to remember what was likely awaiting him if he did.

You're just a toy Sebastian. A little toy I like to play with.

Kathryn's cruel words and mocking grin played over in his mind like some kind of fucked up horror movie. He honestly never saw it coming. Sebastian always thought he knew what she was capable of, but it turns out he hadn't a god damn clue.

With the memory of their last encounter still raw like a puckered wound, the last thing he felt like doing was heading home and going another round with her. Besides, the bitch would likely laugh herself silly if she found out how he'd spent the night. No thank you.

Instead he'd go with his original plan for the day. Last night, when he still thought his big gesture would send Annette running into his arms, Sebastian planned to whisk her away to the Valmont compound on Martha's Vineyard for the rest of the summer. It was beautiful, quiet and best of all, secluded. No one to bother them. Unfortunately, it didn't look like that was going to happen, so he'd have to go it alone. It was kind of a depressing thought, but it seemed like a much better option then spending the rest of the summer in the city, dodging his stepsister and all the questions his absence from the summer debutante circuit were sure to elicit.

In desperate need of some sleep, Sebastian decided to head over to his fuck pad at the Four Seasons. He gave one last lingering glance to the apartment building as he left. He got as far as the end of the block when he got a text. Sebastian froze when he saw who it was from. Annette.

Can we talk?

Sebastian's heart stopped and for a moment he forgot how to text. Getting his shit together he quickly replied.

Yes please. I have so much I need to tell you.

He sounded desperate, but whatever he was desperate. Annette quickly replied back.

Come upstairs

Upon reading that his face broke out into the most idiotic grin, the kind of smile he usually only indulged in when he was very, very drunk. Sebastian had to contain himself from fist punching the air in exhilaration. He didn't of course. He might be a man in love, but he wasn't a complete fucking loser.

Dashing across Central Park West, his head was so far up in the clouds he wasn't paying the slightest bit of attention to his surroundings, so he didn't notice the taxi until it came barreling into him. Sebastian liked to think he slid across that hood like some kind of action star, but in reality, he just looked like an uncoordinated spaz, landing on the pavement in an inelegant heap. It took him a second to realize that he was fine, all major limbs and arteries still attached. Scrambling to his feet he sprinted into the apartment building, paying little mind to the driver cursing him out in Arabic as he did.

The doorman let him in and Sebastian all but ran to the bank of elevators. As he frantically punched the buttons (earning a scowl of disapproval from the middle aged lady manning the front desk) he tried to calm himself down and considered what he might say to her.

Sebastian was well aware that a future with Annette wouldn't be easy. Kathryn might have been fucking with his head, but she hadn't been entirely off base with her assertions that his life would irrevocably change if he pursued a relationship with the headmaster's daughter. They both stood to lose a lot if they went forward with this thing. He knew a future with Annette would require giving up a part of himself that was ugly, but nevertheless integral. Could he do that he wondered. Could he change who he was and become the man Annette deserved?

As Sebastian stepped into the elevator and the steel plated doors shut in front of him, he knew with an odd sort of certainty that he could. He would do anything to be with her, become anyone he had to. Annette was worth it. If there was even a sliver of hope that she wanted to be with him even a fraction of how much he wanted to be with her, he'd be crazy to not fight like hell for her.

Feeling newly invigorated, he marched out of the elevator and to the same doorway he darkened not eight hours earlier. Ringing the doorbell, Sebastian prayed Annette's friends' mother wouldn't answer it. She hadn't been particularly inviting to him last night, not to mention he couldn't remember her name.

He needn't worry. The door opened and Annette was there to greet him with a warm, if guarded smile. Sebastian's heart leapt in his chest at the sight of her. She was dressed in all white, her blonde hair framing her beautiful heart shaped face almost angelically. "Hey," she greeted him tentatively. "Come in."

"Thanks." Sebastian followed her into an elegant main room. He tried to focus on her friends bland decor rather than her exquisite ass. "You look beautiful."

Annette shot him one of the those looks she used to give him when she thought he was full of shit. "I'm a mess," she stated bluntly. "I didn't sleep well last night."

Sebastian winced knowing he was likely the reason for that. "I'm sorry. If it helps any, I slept like shit too."

"I know," she revealed, a slight smirk fighting its way across her face. "I saw you across the street. I wanted to invite you in, but I wasn't sure how Mrs. Michalak would take it."

"Yeah, um, I'm afraid I didn't make the greatest impression last night."

"It's okay, it gave her something to talk about at her party. She's gone for the rest of the afternoon by the way, so you don't have to whisper."

Sebastian nodded. Suddenly feeling awkward and unsure of himself, easily a first, he began to stroll about the room, pretending to examine, Mrs. Michalak's bookcase and limited art collection. He was very conscious of Annette's steady breathing in the background. He wondered if she was as nervous as he was. Finally, he spoke, striving for nonchalance. "So, did you get my letter?"

"Yeah, I did. It was beautiful Sebastian."

His fingers paused on the paperweight he had been toying with and he looked across the room at her. Annette smiled softly, genuinely. Pleased he hadn't made a complete ass out of himself and realizing their still might be some hope he asked, "And the journal?"

Her smile faltered, her gaze falling away from him. Sebastian slowly approached her. "Annette, I know it's a lot to take in—"

"That's one way of putting it." He paused, taken aback by the uncharacteristic bitterness in her tone. "So, I was just a fucking bet, huh?"

"No!" Sebastian quickly closed the distance between them. He attempted to pull her into his arms, but she wrenched away. He immediately flashed back to their last encounter and that well deserved slap she gave him. Fearful of repeating his past mistakes he quickly tried to explain himself. "Annette I'm so sorry, but I wanted you to know the truth even if it made you hate me. I know what I did to you was unspeakably cruel and I've given you no reason to believe me, but you must know, from the bottom of my heart I love you and if I have to spend the rest of my life making it up to you I will."

She shook her head. "I don't think this is something you can make up Sebastian. You lied to me. Repeatedly. You made me think you honestly loved me."

"I do love you!"

"Sebastian," she sighed shaking her head and crossing her arms to her chest. "Maybe this was a bad idea."

Worried he was losing ground he decided to go with brutal honestly. "Look you're right, I did lie to you and you know at first it was all bullshit. I just wanted to win that stupid bet. I thought I was so fucking slick, but the truth is you got under my skin Annette, you made me realize how ridiculous and empty my life was. If you had any idea of the emotional shit storm I've been dealing with these past few weeks you'd laugh yourself silly."

"Would I?"

He nodded. "You've completely upended my world Annette. Even if you tell me you can't see me anymore and you'll never forgive me, I can't go back to the guy I used to be. He's gone. He disappeared when I fell in love with you."

Her arms fell to her sides and Sebastian took that as a sign that her walls were starting to come down as well. "Sebastian, I want to believe you, but I don't know if I can…"

Stepping towards her he cupped her face in his hands, forcing her to look at him. "Do you love me?"

"Yes," she replied quietly.

"Then that's all that matters. Don't give up on this Annette." Before she could respond he kissed her with everything that was in him. He could feel her resolve start to melt when she kissed him back. It didn't last long.

"I can't." She squirmed out of his embrace. "I can't do this."

Refusing to let go, Sebastian tugged her back. "But you want to."

"Yes!" she admitted, wiping at her wet eyes. "Yes, I want you. Look at you, of course I do! You're beautiful and smart and charming. But I can't…I can't trust you Sebastian."

They hit a stalemate then, with Sebastian at a bit of a loss as to how to proceed. She was right, there was no earthly reason for her to trust him, but he wanted to try and wasn't that enough? He was about to say as much when she asked, "What about your sister Sebastian? What about Kathryn?"

He winced at the sound of her name passing her lips. It felt unnatural and wrong. "What about her?"

"Is she…is she the girl you mentioned? The one you said you were in love with?"

"Yes," he replied before realizing what he was saying. "I mean NO! I mean yes, she was the girl I was referring to but, I'm not in love with her. I never was. It was just games and bullshit between us that's all. Kathryn means nothing to me, less than nothing."

Annette eyed him wearily as if she didn't quite believe him. "You wrote about her. A lot. I mean she's your sister Sebastian and you wanted to…" she trailed off making a face.

"I know it's twisted and I have no excuse, but I—"

"You can put it anywhere?" Annette interrupted, "What does that even mean?"

Sebastian inhaled sharply realizing he had to tread carefully. "Um, it means I could…have sex with her in…"

He left it there hoping she'd get the hint. Her beautiful face scrunched up in confusion for a beat until the realization dawned on her. Those big blue eyes of her went impossibly wide and her complexion turned three different shades of red. "Oh my god!" she sputtered. "Ew! Oh my god."

"I'm not proud of myself."

"I would hope not!"

Wanting desperately to turn the conversation in a new direction, that didn't involve him sodomizing his stepsister, Sebastian told her, "Kathryn doesn't matter anymore. I'm done with her and that whole fucked up life. Do you think we could start again?"

"I don't know Sebastian. I think I need a little time."

Hearing that he momentarily panicked. Sebastian had never been particularly good at patience and the idea of waiting around for her to forgive him sounded like torture. Honestly, it was the only reason he could account for what he did next.

"Annette, please give me a second chance!" Sebastian dropped to his knees in front of her and threw his arms around her waist. "Please! I'm an asshole and I'm selfish and if I was a better man, I'd let you go but I can't!"

"Sebastian," Annette sighed, resting her hands gently on his shoulders. "Get up."

He shook his head. "Not until you say you forgive me."

A smile threatened to break out over her face as she looked up at the ceiling and sighed in exasperation, "You're ridiculous."

"Yes, I think we established that."

Cupping his face, she laughed, the earlier tension disappearing. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Marry me?" He was only half joking.

Annette sputtered out a laugh. "What?! I'm not marrying you weirdo."

He looked up at her hurt. "Why not?"

"You mean aside from the fact that you turned my virginity into a sporting event? Um, how about that we're still in high school."

"Semantics. You said it yourself, I'm good looking and charming, but you forgot I'm also very rich. You'll want for nothing and I promise I'll spend the rest of my days making you happy."

Annette rolled her eyes, exasperated. "I'm not marrying you Sebastian."

"Then will you forgive me?"

"Are those my only two options?" Tilting her head her eyes searched his face as if she was looking for something. Finally, she let out a long sigh. "I must be insane."

Before he could question what she meant, Annette leaned down and kissed him. Sebastian, stumbling to his feet, kissed her back, nearly knocking her over with his enthusiasm. Annette broke away laughing. "I can't believe you proposed."

"I meant it."

"That's what I'm afraid of. Come on let's go back to my room. I'd rather not give the maid something to talk about."

He nodded and followed her back to her guest bedroom. As they walked his hands found their way to her waist and his mouth trailed teasing kisses down her neck. Annette giggled. "Sebastian behave."

"I wish I could, but you're too irresistible."

They paused outside the door, Annette turning in his arms to kiss him. Sebastian melt into her embrace, his whole body practically quivering in excitement. This is it, he realized, this is happiness. After years of searching for it in all the wrong things and all the wrong people, here it was, wrapped up in one perfect, beautiful girl.

Breaking away Annette murmured against his mouth, "I have a surprise for you."

"You do?" He slipped a hand up the back of her shirt and tugged teasingly at her bra.

"Yes, but," she pulled at his roving hands. "First I have to ask you something."

Sebastian stopped pawing her when he heard the seriousness creep into her tone. Stepping back, he kept his arms wrapped around her waist. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she replied with a brief, reassuring shake of her head, "But I need to know something and I need you to be completely honest with me."

"Of course."

Shit. He didn't like the sound of that. Sebastian was still new to the whole 'honesty' racket. He shuddered to think what she might ask.

"Sebastian, tell me the truth, did you have sex with Kathryn?"

"What? No!" He let out a short laugh, which was really just a cover to hide his exhale of relief that he wouldn't have to lie to her again. "Annette, I swear we never had sex."

She smiled and seemed to sag against him in relief. Sebastian hugged her close, breathing in her scent.

"That's a shame," Annette murmured against his ear. "She's a fucking incredible lay."

Sebastian paused. It took him a moment to process the remark and even then, he was sure he had heard her correctly. Drawing back, he took in her face. Annette was smiling, but it wasn't any sort of smile he had ever seen her use before. It was a smirk and it was eerily familiar.

"What?" He waited for the punchline as dread filled his stomach.

Annette stepped out of his embrace and threw open the door. There on the messy four poster bed sat Kathryn. She was wearing Annette's teal satin pajama top and a shit eating grin. In her hand was his most prized possession: his journal.

"Hello dear brother," she purred, malice dripping with every syllable. "Sleep well?"

Everything went fuzzy and for a moment he thought he might actually pass out.

This can't be happening.

She couldn't

She wouldn't

Then again…

You're just a toy Sebastian…a little toy I like to play with

Sebastian stormed into the bedroom. "What the hell are you doing here Kathryn?"

Slinking off the bed, she tossed his journal carelessly aside. "Just catching up on some light reading and you know, fucking your girlfriend."

"Excuse me?"

Annette came over to her and slipped an arm around her waist, tugging her close. Sebastian's eyes glazed over as if his brain couldn't comprehend what he was seeing. "Annette, what are you…"

She looked back at him with an expression of mock pity. "Oh dear, I don't think he saw this coming."

"They never do."

Kathryn reached over and pulled Annette into an extravagant kiss. He half expected the blonde to push her away, tell him this was all some sick joke to pay him back before stammering an apology. But she didn't do any of that. Instead, she kissed Kathryn back with a passion he frankly didn't think she was capable of. One hand aggressively threaded through his stepsister's mahogany locks, while the other tugged sharply, possessively at her waist. There was something so animalistic about it. Annette kissed her like she was claiming her.

He might have thought it was hot had she not been decimating his heart in the process.

When they broke apart, lips red and raw, eyes wide and charged, it took them a moment to realize he was there. Annette looked over at him and Sebastian studied her face, looking for the women he loved but she wasn't there. The girl looking back at him was a stranger.

It was then the realization finally hit him. He had been played.

"What's the matter Sebastian?" Annette taunted. "Cat got your tongue?"

A/N: Couple things to note. This story is part one in what will be a four part series. The good news? I've actually finished part one and I'm in the process of editing it. So yes at the very least this story will not be abandoned. A new chapter will be posted the 10th, 20th, and 30th of every month (the 29th of this month). I hope you enjoy it, it's different from what I've written in the past but it's been fun to write. let me know what you think. Thanks for reading!