Cailin looked so sincere in his desire to please that I hated I wasn't more appreciative. Truth was I doubted the removal was possible. He had already ordered the Tower have autonomy and was ignored.

We were standing on the outer wall of the keep and I looked out across the Amaranthine Ocean wondering why I was still ho-hum. "Yes. Your intentions, your Majesty, mean the world to me."

"But," Cailan prompted.

"But I doubt" I paused and tried to gather my thoughts and express something only Teyrn knew. I toyed with the end of my braid, "I am sorry, Cailan but the truth is I was supposed to die. And I am at a loss. I don't know where to go from here. I don't know the first thing about being a Grey Warden except kill the archdemon and end the blight. While we were traveling, I was nothing more than a glorified healer."

"You kicked as much arse as the rest of us. Not one of us traveling Ferelden and facing everything we faced stayed what they originally were." He paused and continued having taken my hand in his and squeezed.

"Your body count was equal to Aedan's and Alistair's. By now even you must admit you've become the warrior healer. You killed the Archdemon, the Architect, the Mother and scores of Darkspawns. Golems you just dealt with and everything you have killed since your assignment here. It's said you saved the city of Amaranthine even after everyone else gave up on it."

I couldn't muster more than a halfhearted smile. The king was attempting to give me a pep talk. The least I could do was pretend he succeeded.

"Trust me Sire, I had help. A lot of it. It was their skills that put me where I could take the finally blow if you like. But that is not the point. Do you know why Riordan wanted Loghain made a Warden?"

Cailan could tell by the way she spat the name of his former Regnant she was holding on to a lot of animosity. He would have to ask her one day about the bruises that Loghain sported when released from the holding cell in Fort Drakon after the battle with the dragon. He shook his head no.

I didn't say anything for several minutes trying to find the words. These were Grey Warden secrets but even they didn't want anything to do with me since I survived. "The reason a Warden has to kill an Archdemon is because his soul will jump from Darkspawn to Darkspawn. They are empty vessels with no soul. A perfect container. But a Warden has a soul and the two souls war in one body. It kills both the Warden's the Archdemon's soul, and the Warden's body."

"But you didn't die," Cailan said a frown marring his still boyish face.

"Exactly."

"Why? Is the Archdemon not dead. I saw the defeated dragon on the rooftop. Are we going to have another blight on our hands? Is this why the Wardens were pleased by the additional Grey Warden base in Ferelden."

I grew pensive because I didn't have the answers. "I don't know. The Architect spoke as if the 'Old God' was gone. But I don't know if we can believe him. The Dragon part of him is dead. I made sure of that myself. Aedan was not happy with me taking the last blow but… after all that he did he'll have to live with the disappointment."

"You thought you were going to die if you killed the Archdemon. You were to become the sacrifice. And now after preparing to die you must live. That is hard thing."

I chuckle wryly the irony is not lost on me. I had been looking for an escape but fate as it seemed had different ideas. "It doesn't help that Weisshaupt doesn't know what to do with me since I survived and want me as far from the Anderfels as possible."

"Their loss. Ferelden's gain. Ferelden can always use a beautiful hero and her dashing King."

"Flirt," I said a grin pulling at the corner of my mouth.

"Mage."

"Name calling is really beneath you Sire."

"You started it. Besides, I had to do something to get you to smile. And since you took sex off the table you tied my hands."

I giggle despite myself. Sometimes when I am around him it feels like the days when it was just he and I trying to get to Redcliff. His charism was infectious to say the least and it is or was incredibly hard not to be sucked into his sphere.

For a while, during our travels with the group I had a terrible crush on him. If it hadn't been for Alistair, I might have allowed myself to become his mistress. And up until he fell for our bard, he was incredibly willing. "So, what brings your Majesty to my… the Grey Wardens humble Arling."