Welcome back folks to Chapter 2! Now the gang's at St. Petersburg and they meet someone very special...

Narrator: Class 2-3 soon leaves the restaurant and ride the train to St. Petersburg, but when they arrive, all of the hotels are booked.

Yukari: Crap! How we are supposed to find a place to stay in?

Nyamo: Maybe if you didn't get distracted by the vodka while we're preparing for the field trip, none of this will ever happen!

Chiyo: Don't worry! My grandma lives in St. Petersburg, so maybe she'll let all of us stay at her palace.

Tomo: Chiyo! Are you crazy! How you're expecting us to fit in…

(Cut to the class standing in front of a humongous mansion, even larger than Chiyo's mansion.)

Tomo: Oh…

Osaka: Yanno, we should bring some melons as an offerin'.

(The doors open, revealing an old lady, no bigger than Chiyo.)

Chiyo: Grandma!

Chiyo's grandma: Oh Chiyo! You have grown so much since I last saw you! (sees Chiyo's older friends) Are they your cousins?

Yomi: No, we're Chiyo's friends.

Chiyo: Grandma, Me, my friends and classmates, and my teachers need a place to stay. Can we stay at your place?

Chiyo's grandma: Why of course! I have enough room to sleep all of you.

Class 2-3 and the teachers: Hooray!

Osaka: Oh no, Chiyo's grandma also has them evil pigtails. I have a very bad feelin' about this.

(Cut to the living room, which is larger than most living rooms and has a fireplace that is tall as Sakaki. All of the girls are in their pajamas, though Kagura's PJs are a green tank top and blue short- shorts and this is Russia, but who cares! There's a fireplace.)

Chiyo: Grandma, can you tell us the story of the Firebird?

Yomi: Firebird? What's that?

Tomo: Your new dieting plan. (gets double chopped)

Osaka: Ya mean one of the Four Gods?

Chiyo grandma: No, no. The Firebird protects and unites Russia with her sweet song. If she's gone, then Russia will fall into chaos.

(Osaka (in the background) is playing with the tv set)

Kagura: Osaka, what are you doing?

Osaka: Tryin' to find somethin' in Japanese. (hear the "Little Einsteins" theme in Japanese) Hey, y'all! The only thing I found in Japanese is that kid's show we used to watch as kids!

Tomo: Oh! Yomi! Kagura! Sakaki! It's that kid's show we used to watch!

(The girls sans Chiyo scoots towards the tv screen, with big smiles and sparkling eyes)

Chiyo: What are you guys are so happy about?

Tomo: Chiyo! This… is…. THE BEST SHOW IN MY CHILDHOOD!

Yomi: Translation: Little Einsteins is better than Barney (Kagura's eyes are hidden when that word was spoken) and Dora(Tomo's eyes are hidden when that word was spoken ) combined! Kagura owns all of the DVDs, so her, me and Tomo know each episode's plot by heart!

(After the title sequence ends, a news flash appears)

Russian news anchor: We interrupt the following program for some breaking news. At this moment, the Firebird has been mysteriously kidnapped! The only clue as to who stole the nation's protector is a paper that has the words "Kashchei the Immortal".

Chiyo's grandma: It can't be!

Chiyo: What grandma?

Chiyo's grandma: Kashchei the Immortal's back!

All of the girls: Kashchei the who?

Chiyo's grandma: Kashchei the Immortal. He's a wizard who sold his soul to Satan to gain powerful magic to overthrow the Khanate but after the Firebird was born and defeated the Golden Horde, he envies her God-like powers and wishes to kill her, He almost kills her during the Russian Revolution, but that plan didn't work and he was sealed away. But, now with the seal weaken, he was able to capture the Firebird and lock her up in a cage in his castle. Now, without the song of the Firebird, Russia will fall into madness!

Chiyo: Oh no! Grandma, what we're going to do? (see the Knuckleheads with a red aura )

Tomo: Chiyo! The obvious answer is to go to Kashchei's castle…

Kagura: And defeat him and free the Firebird from her cage prison!

Osaka: But the problem is how we're supposed to find the castle?

(Tomo and Kagura face fault)

Yomi: Osaka! We need a feather from the Firebird!

(Sakaki sees a feather fall into the fireplace and grabs it)

Sakaki: Could this be the feather?

Tomo: (grabs the feather ) Yep! That's a feather from the Firebird and it's pointing to the… east?

Chiyo's grandma: Of course! Kashchei's castle is located in the far east of Russia. No wonder why he isn't found by the government.

Yomi: But, how we're supposed to get to the castle without Ms. Yukari noticing that the six of us are gone?

Tomo: Don't worry Yomi, Aunt Yukari drank so much vodka that the hangover will make her unconscious until noon of tomorrow!

Yomi: That's… amazing at the same time disturbing, but that still doesn't answer my question of how to get to the castle.

Chiyo's grandma: Don't worry, I got you covered.

(She pushes a button, causing a garage door to open, revealing a rocket-powered sled pulled by 6 borzois)

Chiyo's grandma: Behold, The Red Rocket. This sled is built to withstand speeds of 80 km/hr and my 6 borzois are lightning-fast.

Chiyo: Oh thank you, grandma!

Tomo: Alright, everyone! It's time to lock and load!

Narrator: An awesome montage of the girl changing into their normal, daytime clothes( and Osaka grabbing a knife) happens. Then, all of the girls jump on the sled, engaged the rocket boosters, and blast off into the Russian wilderness.

Woo boy, the "The Little Einsteins: Rocket's Firebird Rescue" influences are getting stronger( The girls' sled is called the "Red Rocket", the magical firebird feather, Kaschei is our villain of the day.) But today, we learned about three things:

1. Sakaki, Tomo, Yomi, Osaka, and Kagura are raised by "Little Einsteins". (Good taste on them, I was also raised by Little Einsteins, it's good)

2. Yukari's liver is stronger than once thought.

3. Kagura is afraid of Barney the Dinosaur and Tomo is afraid of Dora the Explorer (Kagura: It was too positive and creepy! Tomo: It's too creepy and girly for my tastes)

Note: Azumanga Daioh characters are owned by Kiyohiko Azuma and Little Einsteins is owned by Disney