Only five miles to Tokyo now. Soon I'll be with Hina again!
Hodaka was as silent as most of the passengers on the long voyage to Tokyo, drinking in the hustle and bustle of the big city, refreshing himself with it. The air was rain-washed, and the afternoon sun, hidden from the clouds, was warm on his shoulders. He'd been right to come here. Tokyo would give him the sanctuary he needed, and with Hina he'd be able to find a way to repair his ruined world. He leaned forward on the open deck as they turned onto the familiar harbor, smiling in anticipation.
But when the city came in sight, he let out a cry of despair. "What's happened to the city? It's looking half submerged." The Rainbow Bridge was underwater and only four pillars projected from the ocean. The many boxes scattered across the water's surface like blocks were the tops of buildings that hadn't been submerged completely.
Oh right, the rain.
At this point, one-third of Tokyo was underwater. The city's drainage functions had been overwhelmed to the point of exhaustion and it seemed that the only way to travel was by motorboat. Cars and trains still ran through the city tough, on areas that the Pacific Ocean didn't reach.
No wonder the traffic was bad at the docks back home. My island has become a refugee for homeless people! If only I could tell them how I felt, but they wouldn't believe me.
He got off and went to find an apartment nearby the university where he was planning to study in the Department of Agriculture. In this day and age, finding dry land was important, not that there were too many students living there since they migrated west. Funny thing, the 100% Sunshine Girl website was still up, as he had confirmed when checking it on his phone out of curiosity. After putting away some of his clothes from his suitcase in a drawer, he decided to find another soul that very certain to have stayed in the city even after all this time: Keisuke Suga.
The answering machine of K&A Planning's phone number led him to the new address. Which was in an apartment someplace in the higher levels of the city.
Keisuke Suga, Hodaka's employer, was waiting outside, wearing the same tight old shirt. It was a shock to see Suga; the first few seconds were always a shock. Hodaka genuinely loved and respected Suga as if he was the father he always wanted. After returning to the island, no matter soft his own father had gotten, he wished that he could have been more like Suga.
"Suga-san!" He walked toward him, in his special inebriated way. He threw his arms around his neck and hugged him fiercely.
Suga accepted his embrace without emotion. "I'm glad to see you, too, Hodaka. It's been a long time."
"Too long. It's shameful. I've spent two and a half years on probation."
"You'll be glad to know that K&A Planning is a proper editing agency. My daughter is living with me, Natsumi and my wife's parents, but nothing's official yet. Want to visit them?"
"Sure."
About a few minutes later, the door to the house flew open, and the porch filled with people. Natsumi stood in front, holding an apron in her arms above the swollen belly that strained the seams of her faded cotton tank top. Her coat had fallen down over one arm. Hodaka forced a gaiety he didn't feel. "Good Lord, Suga, is Natsumi having a baby? You're going to have to build on some more rooms."
Her husband, Wadashi, a man of strong arms, chuckled. "We hope it's a boy." He lifted a hand in greeting to his father-in-law and his niece.
Hodaka waved too, wishing he'd thought to buy some toys to bring to Nagi and Moka. He looked at all of them. Moka was there, Suga's mother-in-law was there after her house got washed away by the flood. Now she had no choice but to live with the difficult man who brought the curse of death upon her family name. Her husband, Suga's wife's father, was out buying groceries. But where was Nagi? Hodaka called out to the little girl. "Hello, Moka-kun." Then he turned back to Suga, looking worried.
"Where's Nagi, Suga? It couldn't be like he was angry with me after what happened years ago." Fear pinched the words in Hodaka's throat.
"Nagi-kun's been sick in bed with a nasty cold," said Natsumi. "He's been there for two whole days. We've fixed him up in one of the spare rooms."
Hodaka was at the door to Nagi's sickroom, holding on to the framework for support.
That boy lying there in the bed was no longer the energetic boy he had come to see as a brother figure. It was replaced by a creature who was as thin as a promise, with snow-white skin, black hair that had darkend over the age and eyes that were closed and weak.
Then he heard Nagi's voice. Thin and halting, but Nagi's sweet, loving voice. "Onēsan, I told you I don't want to embarrass myself in front of the other girls…"
"Nagi-kun!" Hodaka fell to his knees beside the bed. "Nagi-kun, it's Hodaka. I'm back. Please wake up." He put his head down on the bed beside the bony thin shoulders and wept stormily, like a child.
A weightless hand smoothed his bent head. "Don't cry, Hodaka. I guess I was out in the cold too long."
"I might have guessed," Hodaka wailed. "Everything's gone wrong with the weather since I saved your sister. You might be too young to ask me this, but…do you think I made the right choice?"
"Hush, now. No need for speaking. You saved my sister. That's all that matters."
He coughed, lifting his head up by two inches before resting it back down on the pillow.
"I love you, Nagi. There's no telling what will happened if you died or something."
He spent all the time he could in Nagi's room, at Nagi's side. He had fastened all his hopes on the comfort of Hina's arms around him, but now it was his strong young arms that held the sickly boy. Hodaka brought Nagi some cough drops, some soup, hot water for his forehead. He sang to Nagi a couple of RADWIMPS songs in the form of a lullaby. But Nagi would no longer hear of it, he didn't want to be treated like a baby anymore.
Then, after an hour had passed, Nagi woke. "Why are you crying?" he whispered. "Is it because I am sick? It's just a cold, it's not like I'm dying or anything." His hand stirred in Hodaka's, freed itself, stroked Hodaka's bent head. "Hush, now. Nothing's so bad as you think."
"I'm sorry," he sobbed, "I just can't stop crying because I am happy to see you were all right…did Suga-san take you in while I was gone?"
"Yeah, he did. Adoption papers and everything." Nagi's bent fingers pushed Hodaka's front lock away from his face. "Tell me what's troubling you, Hodaka-san."
Hodaka looked into the sad, cute, loving eyes and felt the most profound pain he had ever known. "I've come back to see how everyone has been doing. I turned 18 last week, I graduated and everything. But I feel like I've done everything wrong, Nagi. I don't know how I could have made so many mistakes. I don't understand. I'm even beginning to question myself."
"Hodaka-san, you done what you had to do. Nobody does more than that. God sent you some heavy burdens, and you carried them. What's done is done. Don't fret yourself now." Nagi's heavy eyelids closed over tears that glistened in the dim light, and his ragged breathing slowed in sleep.
"How can I not fret?" Hodaka wanted to shout. "I'm free from the island, but my heart doesn't feel any lighter, and I don't know what to do. I need Hina, and she's gone. Do you know where she is?"
"All you have to do is follow your heart," Nagi said, his eyes directed at the ceiling.
Follow my heart? Hodaka lifted his head, wiped the tears away and walked out of the room.
Every exhausted, frightened part of his body cried out that he should give up, stay where he was, hugging the safety of the unseen ground beneath him until the rain subsided, if it ever did, and he could go out without an umbrella. But Nagi needed warmth. And only a small hint of the cheering yellow light of the sun was peeking out through the clouds.
Hodaka brought himself slowly to his knees and probed his head. Surely, he had never considered his vow to want Hina more than any other blue sky to be such a childish, cheesy romantic choice of words. Could he compromise between the warmth of the sun, or the wet cold air of the rain? He was gasping for breath, his mind not functioning properly. Where was the sun? Where was the blue sky? Maybe his prayer two and a half years ago was the cause of all this. Maybe there is a god…or maybe there is a person in this world just like Hina whose weather-bending powers brought the rain instead of the sun.
His fingers brushed across cold metal of the walls. Hodaka scrabbled along on his knees toward the front door, then both hands were clasping the ridged corners of the walls. He sat on his behind, clasping his hands to his chest in a desperate embrace.
Oh Lord, I'm all turned around now. I don't even know where Hina is, much less know the whereabouts. Maybe I could ask someone. He looked up frantically, in the living room, hoping that someone could give him the answer. Natsumi and Suga were too busy preparing lunch in the kitchen, Moka was too young to know the whole city and Suga's mother-in-law didn't seem to care.
For a moment he wanted to cry out, to scream and scream until he attracted someone in the house, someone who would help him find Hina, who'd come find her and lead him to her. His pride forbid it. Lost in his own dreams and doubts, only a few steps from the front door!
He drew a deep breath into his lungs and began to crawl clumsily on hands and knees across the cold floor. Sooner or later he'd be running into the streets, looking for all the old places—the McDonalds, the shrine, the hotel, the building where they watched the fireworks—and he'd get his bearings. He was starting to realize that it would be quicker for him to get up and walk. He wouldn't feel like such a fool, either. But he might fall again, and this time twist his ankle or something. Then he'd be helpless until someone found him in the open streets of the city. No matter what he had to do, anything was better than lying alone and helpless and lost. He thought about Kozushima again and how he saw it as a prison in his sixteen-year-old mind. Following a light in his dream was the best thing that ever happened to him. It brought him to Hina.
Where was Hina? She had to be out there someplace, he felt as if he'd crawled halfway to Shibuya. Panic brushed past him. Suppose the rain never lifted, suppose he just kept on crawling and crawling forever without reaching anything?
Stop it! he told himself, stop it right now. His throat was making strangled noises.
He struggled to his feet, made himself breathe slowly, made his mind take command of his racing heart and pushed all thoughts of his ultimate decision aside. He was Hodaka Morishima, he told himself. He was at Tokyo, and his memory was tracing every last inch of his footsteps of his three-month getaway. Before he even realized it, he had known Tokyo like the back of his hand, almost as equal as his knowledge of the island. So what if he couldn't see forty feet in front of him because of the fog that came with the rain? He knew that the one he loved was out there, waiting for him; all he had to do was follow his heart.