This wasn't real, Shrek concluded. It couldn't be. It was some elaborate, terribly cruel dream that made him so happy it terrified him. He was sure he'd wake up in his lonely bed having delivered the princess to Duloc where she stayed and became Queen, like she should have done.
Except. He'd already childishly pinched himself, just to test the theory. To his surprise, all signs did suggest that he was awake. He looked to her once again; his wife. She was sleeping soundly on the other side of the bed, her long, unbraided hair was a mess - it was the messiest he'd seen it so far. But then again, that day was full of firsts for them both. He reached out to stroke it, but stopped himself. He didn't want to wake her, he just felt like he needed to be touching her in some way, to make it feel real to him. She had fallen asleep in his arms some time ago and since rolled way. It had quietly disappointed him. He expected her to stay close to him all night. As much as he would have struggled to sleep while holding her, he wasn't getting much sleep anyway. She seemed to have no such trouble. Maybe this wasn't as unbelievable to her, she didn't have the same expectations of life long loneliness that he did. He'd never thought much of the future, but dying alone was something he very much expected. He guessed that love wasn't really something you could plan for. Well, Fiona had planned for falling in love with someone, except, it was no one like him.
He knew he was sure about this sudden turn of events. He'd never been surer of anything in his life. He just wondered if she was sure too. He had spent all his time leading up to the wedding worried that she'd wake up and come to her senses. He was afraid to even ask her, in case she would pause to think about it and realise she wasn't sure. She had seemed sure; she didn't hesitate in saying 'I do' earlier that day – their wedding that seemed a lifetime ago – he couldn't stifle the smile that crossed his face for a moment as he considered it. She had seemed very sure for the rest of their day spent together. In fact, he'd intermittently forgotten about his worries as he'd been so preoccupied. Just enough to make him think he'd shaken them. But, as he lay awake while his wife slept he realised that his fears only kept shifting, staying one step ahead of him all the time.
He didn't want to take his eyes off of her. Even to sleep for the few hours until morning. A little part of him was terrified that he would wake up and she would be gone. That she would wake up and lay there watching him, like he did her, but have the opposite thought process. She was a princess after all. She had a king and a queen somewhere as her parents. They'd definitely dislike him. So he selfishly didn't ask. Just in case the mention of what kingdom she belonged to, or her family, would be the reason she did come to her senses. She hadn't mentioned anything herself, he guessed so many years in a tower wouldn't leave them fresh in her mind. Just the same with him. They were just two people, separate from the rest of the world. And he liked that. It meant she continued to love him and gaze at him the way she did. He was certain there was nothing that could ever stop him from loving her, she needn't have the same fears.
He watched her sleeping face, her eyelids flickering every now and again, her lips slightly parted. It was almost hypnotising watching her; his wife. Her hair was tangled around her face, tucked under her chin a little. He hesitantly reached out, touching her hair, stroking it. As much as he didn't want to wake her, he realised it wouldn't be the worst if she did. Her steady breath caught in her throat, her lips closed as she shuffled a little. He anticipated her eyes fluttering open - the eyes he could stare at forever – her giving him a small, sleepy smile. But she didn't wake. A part of him was relieved, while she was sleeping she didn't have the time to think about who she was and what she was doing. But, if she woke, he could pull her close again, keep her firmly in his grasp – stay tangled in bed with her for longer than they had been already. He furrowed his brow a little, gently pulling a lock of her hair out from underneath the covers. She continued to sleep through his touch, the touch that he needed. He held onto her hair, brushing his thumb over it. He supposed if he wasn't sleeping and she wasn't waking there wasn't anything to do but keep thinking. He studied her face with his eyes.
Despite himself, a small smile tugged at his lips. Because she was there – beside him. His wife. As terrified as he was about everything crashing down on top of him - burying him forever in the rubble - he was also so happy it almost hurt. He couldn't recall a moment in his life that rivalled how it felt just watching her sleep. Let alone having her smile at him, or holding onto her, or just reliving everything that had happened that evening alone. He had been happy from the moment she kissed him back in Duloc, he really thought it wasn't possible to be happier, only the bar was undeniably raised just having her to himself. He hoped that night could last forever. Or at the very least she would stay in love with him for just one more day, and they could spend another wonderful 24 hours together, even if it was just in that bed, holding her close, talking about nothing and stroking her hair.
So after unexpectedly falling asleep and eventually waking to his wife in tears the next morning - his worst fears materialising in his mind - only to find out she was worried she wasn't beautiful, he couldn't help but smile at her. Her deepest fears were something so silly to him, so very inaccurate. It reassured him more than she could ever know.
. . .
I miss writing Shrek, so here's an update to a one-shot that no one asked for! I semi frequently write epilogues or extra things related to already finished and published fics I have, and this one made it out of the hard drive – yes! I hope you like! Please leave a review :)