Squid Party

Chapter 17: The Girl from Inkopolis


Lucas was on his way back to the stage when he stopped short. To his surprise, the layout had been completely changed. No longer did the trio of cream sofas encircle a glass table in the middle of a black marble floor. Instead, the platform had been reassembled with a concrete material, complete with faded road markings and ink splatters of all shapes and colors.

The refined nightscape was now a giant backdrop of Inkopolis Square, complete with Deca Tower, the Great Zapfish encircling it, and all its various stores. This new setup seemed to pay homage to the city's aesthetic as a whole, including its quirky personality and outlandish design choices. But most of all...

It reminded Lucas of a Battlefield.

His Smasher instincts sparked to life as a rush of excitement surged through his veins. Without even thinking, his eyes began scanning the redesigned stage, eager to assess its layout and how it could be used to his advantage in battle. Pursing his lips in concentration, he studied the arena so intensely, one could almost see the mathematical equations hovering around his head.

This abruptly came to an end at the sound of Ness' voice. "Ready to lose?"

Lucas looked to his side to see the boy in question grinning as he smugly crossing his arms. The blonde grinned back. "Funny, I was about you to ask you the same thing."

They chuckled as the Judds walked up holding flags. While this wasn't anything out of the ordinary, what stuck out about them were their color schemes: Judd's had blue-and-yellow stripes, while Li'l Judd's contained red-and-yellow stripes. These were obviously correlated to the Smasher's shirt patterns, and only one would be raised when a victor was declared.

("Excuse me, gentlemen, but the show will resume in approximately 30 seconds,") informed Judd. ("Are you both purr-pared for battle?")

Ness gave a thumbs up. "You betcha!"

Lucas happily nodded. "Ready when you are."

("Wonderful!") squeaked Li'l Judd. ("If you would, please remain here for the time being. Once the cameras start rolling again, we're going to introduce you into the fray—Master Hand style!")

The Smashers looked at each other, intrigued by this piece of news. "Ooooh..."

With that, the cats walked to the stage's middle in preparation for their announcing roles. As everyone waited to go live again, Orange crept out from the depths of backstage. She quietly sighed, realizing there wasn't enough time to give Lucas one last pep talk or even thank him for his earlier compassion. At least she could catch the ringside action...

Remembering she had a job to do, she called back to the staff. "All right, everybody! Look lively, 'cuz this is the final act! Round Three starts in 3...! 2...! 1...!"

On her mark, the cameramen resumed filming as the curtain reopened for the big finale. The spectators cries of excitement were heightened upon seeing the stage's makeover, already knowing what was in store.

Neon spotlights circled around the studio before focusing on the Judds in the middle of the stage, eliciting thunderous applause. The bigger cat raised his mic as "Color Pulse" hyped up the atmosphere.

("And we're back! I take it you've all been enjoying the show so far?")

His response came in the form of joyous screams, claps, and whistles.

("We'll take that as a 'yes'!") chimed in Li'l Judd. ("And luckily for you, we've saved the best for last!")

("That's right! We've gotten to learn all about the Smashers and their a-mew-zing adventures, but now it's time to put those ex-purr-iences to the test!") exclaimed Judd.

("The interview may be over, but don't worry! These two are battlers at heart, so I think it's time we let their fists do the talking! What do you say, folks?")

Li'l Judd put a paw to his ear as the spectators roared in agreement.

("Sounds like a 'yes' to me, so let's get this party started!") Judd pointed offstage with his tail and Ness' flag. ("First up, hailing all the way from Onett, Eagleland... A five-time, perfect attendee Smasher! He's been all over Earth, bound for new adventures, new friends, and a new sense of accomplishment every day! You know 'em, you love 'em... Give it up for my boy and yours... NEEEESS!")

Upon hearing his name, Ness hopped out from the back, pointing finger guns at the crowd as he winked. "Yo, guys! How's it going?! Hey! 'Sup! Ha ha! Right back atcha, pal! Oh, you, too! Yeah, that's right! Let's make some more noise!"

The audience squealed with delight as he darted up and down the stage, high-fiving dozens of outstretched hands in the front row. His charisma was unmatched as they started chanting his name, cheering him on as if he'd been their hometown hero for years.

Once he'd riled up the masses, Ness sauntered back over to the middle, confidently dusting off his shoulders and readjusting his cap. Rolling his eyes, Lucas shook his head with a smile. Typical, showboating Ness.

Li'l Judd also pointed offstage with his tail and Lucas' flag. ("And now, travelling here all the way from the humble town of Tazmily Village... He made be from the middle of Nowhere Islands, but there's nowhere this plucky youth has gone without bringing a smile to people's faces! Joining the fight in Brawl, don't let his gentle purr-sonality fool you... He can pack quite the punch! Please put your paws together for... LUCAAAAS!")

Lucas slumped over as he took a deep breath. Straightening up, he simply walked out onstage. Modest at heart, he didn't even bother trying to upstage Ness, choosing to meekly wave at the crowd instead. Fortunately, he was welcomed with just as much love and admiration as the other psychic. It was nice to know they weren't playing favorites. Reaching the Judds in the center, he stood across from his rival.

("All right, here're the rules for everyone before we get started,") began Judd. ("One stock, no time limit, no items! There will be no camping, no spamming, and no taunting! We want this to be a nice, clean fight, so no hitting below the belt, no illegitimate moves, and no assistance from anyone on or off the stage! When a Smasher falls, he has until the count of 10 to get up! If he can't stand on his own two feet before the countdown finishes, he forfeits the match! Is that understood?")

"Yeah, yeah, we gotcha," snickered Ness.

"Yes, sir," humbly answered Lucas.

Li'l Judd nodded. ("Good! Time to get this battle under way!")

The crowd buzzed with excitement as the cats scampered off to opposite sides of the stage. Judd ran to the left with Li'l Judd on the right. Raising their flags unison, they counted down.

("3... 2... 1... GO!")

As the cats swung their flags, "Fly Octo Fly" began playing as Ness dashed forward to launch the first attack. Lucas preempted this and dodged, retaliating with PK Fire. Despite being a direct hit, Ness charged through the flames wielding a bat. Lucas had no time to escape as it connected and sent him to the floor. He didn't stay there long as he sprang back up, sparkling with PSI energy. Ness saw this and did the same.

The onlookers crooned in awe as the boys' fantastical powers came to life before their very eyes. Orange was no different as she excitedly hopped up and down backstage, using the crowd's cheers to cover her own.

"C'MON, SQUIRT! YOU CAN DO IT!" she screamed, excitedly swinging her fists. "GET 'EM!"

Again, Ness closed the gap by darting over to Lucas. He flung his own PK Fire, as did Lucas, causing an explosion in the middle. Using the billowing smoke as cover, Ness summoned PK Freeze, conjuring a flurry of ice to hurl at Lucas. Seeing the attack through the smokescreen, the blonde jumped away as it shattered into a frozen burst on the ground.

The smoke cleared as Lucas landed near Ness, the two exchanging a volley of kicks and punches. Fists flew, legs swept, and sparks of PSI wildly flickered as their bodies became weapons. Arcane lights of all colors, shapes, and sizes emitted from the Smashers' limbs and digits as the elements were theirs to command. Magical particles hovered and shimmered in the spotlight, making the set look as if it'd been bombarded with fireworks.

Their altercation ended when Ness raised his arms and thrust them down, calling upon PK Flash. Emerging from his body, a surge of PSI suddenly detonated as it crashed into the floor, bursting into a brilliant display of blinding light. Too close to dodge, Lucas was thrown back several feet and into the ground by the resulting shock wave. He rebounded as his back connected with the hard floor, flipping over before collapsing in a crumpled heap.

Judd was on the scene in an instant, beginning his dreaded countdown. ("1...! 2...! 3...!")

Everyone went ballistic as Lucas fell, many clamoring for him to get up so the match could continue. Fortunately, the downed Smasher was able to recover just as Judd's count reached four. Once Lucas was back on his feet, the feline returned to his edge of the stage.

"Heh, shoulda stayed down, Luke!" teased Ness.

Again, he barreled forward, fingers alight with another PSI move. By now, Lucas had grown savvy to his opponent's approach. Predicting another PK Fire, he jumped over it, delivering a powerful kick to Ness' side. His attack thwarted, a quick sucker punch was enough to stun the blonde as the capped fighter created some distance.

Expecting Lucas to pursue him, Ness used PK Thunder, spawning an electrically-charged sphere from the recesses of his mind. Instead of aiming it at the blonde, Ness angled the bolt into himself. As it connected, the force launched him forward with the blistering speed of a rocket. Foreseeing this, Lucas jumped over with ease. Seeing he'd missed, Ness skidded to a stop in time to meet his rival for another bout of hand-to-hand combat.

Another battle for control took place as the duo somehow ending up getting airborne. The two were able to keep up with each other until Ness misread a move, allowing Lucas to spike him into the ground with a midair back kick. Landing, the blonde wiped sweat from his brow as he tried to catch his breath.

As Ness lay on his back, Li'l Judd appeared and began to count. ("1...! 2...! 3...!")

Wincing, Ness chuckled before hopping back onto his feet, fixing his hat and dusting himself off. He was done fooling around now; time to get serious.

Just when the spectators didn't think the fight could get any crazier, they were quickly proven wrong. The Smashers collided like cars, unleashing another dazzling array of attacks and combos on each other. Moves were flung about indiscriminately as the battle reached a fever pitch.

Ness was kicked, Lucas was punched. Lucas was frozen, Ness was burned. One moment, they were in the air, then on the ground. There were grabs and throws, a bat and a stick, a yo-yo and a... snake? Everything was happening so fast, it was difficult to keep track of who was doing what. This only made the crowd more frenzied.

Realizing he was reaching his limit, Ness finally broke away from the scuffle. His eyes glinted as his body flared to life with a fierce aura. Reading him, Lucas followed suit. In the blink of an eye, their auras exploded outwards as they thrust their hands to the sky, simultaneously belting, "PK STARSTORM!"

The interior and its inhabitants were mercilessly jostled about as dozens of blazing comets rained down from seemingly nowhere. Everyone was both enthralled and horrified as the meteors slammed into the stage with such force, they shattered the foundation, smashed spotlights, and knocked the curtains' railing off-kilter. The impacts crashed with the sound of thunder as they shook the floor with the force of an earthquake. The chaos culminated when the last wave of comets met and exploded into a shower of stars so bright, it was akin to a supernova.

As the deadly PSI's remnants disappeared, the crowd's senses gradually returned to them. The spots in their eyes faded, the ringing in their ears stopped, and the tingling in their limbs subsided. The devastation seem to end almost as quickly as it began.

The cameramen were rattled in their perches; it was a miracle they were still recording. Those working the lights and audio were just as shaken, but managed to keep what they could running. Even the staff backstage were in a state of terrified wonder as they tried to comprehend what just happened.

In its wake, the havoc left behind a platform blasted with smoking cracks and craters. The pulley system was mangled, leaving scorched curtains to drape lifelessly in several places. Malfunctioning spotlights buzzed and crackled as they sprayed sparks haphazardly, exposed wiring threatening to drop them to the ground like many of their brethren.

As the smoke finally settled, a haggard Ness barely remained standing. He panted heavily, his disheveled body covered in scrapes and scratches. Several feet away, Lucas was sprawled out on the floor, grimacing in pain and not looking much better.

It took a moment for the crowd to react, but upon doing so, their cries were almost deafening. Judd cautiously peeked out from backstage before running over to start his count again.

("1...! 2...! 3...! 4...! 5...!")

Though winded, Ness managed to force a tired laugh, confident Lucas wouldn't be getting up anytime soon. This didn't last long as he then heaved a groan, legs turning to jelly as he suddenly grew weary. He resolved to stay standing, but after a bout of drunken swaying, collapsed with an exhausted grunt.

The onlookers were more like raving lunatics now, screaming at the top of their lungs at the stalemate. The Judds weren't sure what to, but amid the madness, they looked to each other and came to a mutual understanding.

Rushing out from his side of the stage, Li'l Judd began his count on Ness as Judd started over on Lucas, the two counting down together.

("1...! 2...! 3...!")

Lucas squinted. Between the crowd's screeching and the stage's disarray, he couldn't make heads or tails of anything. For all he knew, Ness'd already won and was doing a victory lap around the studio. Despite this, his natural Smasher instinct made him determined to rise. Slowly turning over on his side, he tried to regain his bearings while remaining vigilant for any unexpected attacks. One more hit and it'd be over.

("4...! 5...! 6...!")

Still lightheaded, Lucas carefully collected himself in a heap as his aching limbs reluctantly worked together to lift their owner. With some difficultly, his trembling arms managed to push him up onto trembling legs, head swimming as he struggled to maintain balance.

("7...! 8...! 9...!")

...Why were they still counting?! He was standing! At least, he thought he was? He looked down at his feet. His blurry vision showed what he thought were his sneakers, but not much else. Was he not standing straight enough? Maybe he was still on a knee and the shoes he saw were a result of double vision?

("...10!") Judd blew a whistle. ("HEEEEEE'S OUT!")

Lucas sighed, letting his shoulders slump. He hated that he'd lost, but there couldn't be a winner without a loser. That was another pivotal point of being a Smasher; victories were to be celebrated by all, while losses were a way to encourage the defeated. It was an unspoken, but fundamental rule.

Li'l Judd pointed a flag at the victor. ("THIS GAME'S WINNER IS... LUCAS!")

Lucas' head jerked up. "...What?"

As his eyes adjusted to focus on the distance, he saw Ness still struggling to stand. He managed to lift his torso, but his legs refused to cooperate, leaving him stranded on his hands and knees.

With Ness' defeat brought the cheers of hundreds, but loudest of all was Orange.

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH!" she squealed, hopping up and down like an excited schoolgirl.

As the spectators showered Lucas with praise, several stagehands appeared from backstage to help Ness stand. Instead of accepting their offer, he shook his head.

"Nah... Nah, I got it," he grunted. "I'm good. I'm good..."

Gritting his teeth, he tried getting to his feet again, almost succeeding until his arms buckled and gave out. The sudden lack of support sent him back to the hard, unforgiving floor.

Seeing Ness' plight, Lucas slowly staggered over. As his shadow loomed over him, Ness looked up with a weak smile. Lucas returned it.

As the victor offered a hand, the loser winced as he struggled to lift his own. Catching each other's wrists, Lucas leaned over just enough to allow Ness leverage to help him up. The boys clumsily shambled about as they readjusted their orientations, eventually able to support each other with an arm draped over the other's shoulders.

The Judds applauded their efforts as they walked over, the smaller cat offering Lucas his mic. Ness shuffled his weight to the blonde's side, allowing Lucas to gingerly bend over and take it. Addressing the audience, he took a deep breath to speak.

"...So, you see... Being a Smasher isn't about winning, losing, or even fighting in general..." he panted. "It's about testing your mettle, trying to better yourself and your opponent's skills, and most of all, it's about who's standing after the dust clears... On our own, we're just two guys who beat the snot out of each other, but together, we're Smashers..."

"Psst, do a mic drop," whispered Ness through a snicker.

"Uh, okay...? Um, here comes the mic drop?"

Confused, Lucas limply tossed the microphone on the ground, causing a dull thumping sound from its impact and an awkward feedback noise as it rolled across the stage. Ness couldn't help but snortle at the blonde's confused delivery and cluelessness of the situation.

The crowd blankly stared at them as crickets chirped before spontaneously exploding into roars of delight. They were so excited from the interview, the fight, and Lucas' final words, their cheers quickly turned into a standing ovation. Lucas breathed a sigh of relief, now knowing it was truly all over.

Back offstage, Orange was still pumped by Lucas' victory. She just wanted to run out there, punt Ness off the platform, and give the blonde the biggest, tightest hug she could muster. Despite her yearnings, she managed to restrain herself, settling for happily dancing around instead.

It was then she realized with horror that, while secluded from the spectators, she was still in public. Her excited shimmying could've easily been seen by staff.

Freezing mid-dance, she slowly turned her head around to see if there'd been any witnesses. There were a few stagehands further backstage, but they were too engrossed in their own cheering to notice her. To them, she was just another ecstatic Inkling. Regardless, it'd probably be best to stop dancing for now...

Seeing a winner determined, the Squid Sisters and Off The Hook emerged from backstage, joining the viewers in applauding. Upon seeing them, the cats knew it was time to wrap things up.

("Well folks, after that explosive finale, I believe it's time we sign off!") announced Judd into his mic. ("Thank you so much for joining us today, and we hope you all had as much of a smashing time as we did!")

"Until next time..." began Callie.

"Stay fresh..." added Marie, she and her cousin striking their trademark pose.

Pearl struck her famous stance. "Don't get cooked..."

"And stay off the hook!" finished Marina, mirroring Pearl.

"Ebb and Flow" played the show out as the tattered curtains closed one last time. Despite being in ruins from earlier, they were still just barely operational. The audience applauded as the remaining spotlights dimmed and the studio's main lights turned on, signifying the show was over. For those watching and streaming, the credits proceeded to roll.

Within moments, the crowd began to stand and collect their things in preparation to leave. Staff gathered around the exits to direct them along so everyone could leave in a timely fashion. With a full house, it was imperative they exited safely and swiftly.

Onstage, Judd congratulated the Smashers. ("Good game, you two! That was a fantastic show! You've made us all so purr-oud!")

("The ratings are going to be through the roof!") squeaked Li'l Judd. ("This may very well be the biggest broadcast we've done in recent years, and it's all thanks to you!")

"What he said!" agreed Callie. "That was the performance of a lifetime, right up there with some of our concerts!"

"Yeah, thanks." Ness surveyed the damage. "Uh, sorry we trashed the place. Kinda got a bit carried away..."

"What, are you kidding?!" exclaimed Pearl. "You guys did great! Nothing gets the people pumped more than some good, ol' collateral damage! Trust me, I know from experience!"

"Seeing you battle was like poetry in motion!" swooned Marina. "Turf Wars have always been a type of art around here, but now I see being a Smasher is one, too!"

"How about we celebrate the occasion with a selfie?" suggested Marie. "It'll give us all something to remember this by."

Ness laughed weakly. "Sure, if you don't mind us looking kinda worse for the wear."

"Oh, pshaw!" Callie flippantly waved a hand. "It wouldn't be as authentic if you were all good and ready to go!"

Lucas beamed. "Sure, why not? Never hurts to have a souvenir."

"Awesome!" Dashing backstage, Pearl quickly returned with a jellyfish staffer. Plopping him down in front of the group, she gave him her phone. "Here, do us a solid and take our pic, aight?"

"Okay, okay! Let's huddle up!" giggled Callie. "This is gonna be so cool!"

The psychics hobbled themselves over as Pearl darted back into position. Callie and Marie gathered on the left and struck their famous poses as Pearl and Marina performed their own trademark stance on the right. Judd and Li'l Judd stood in front, pointing their tails and the Smasher's respective flags at them as if declaring a winner. Ness and Lucas found themselves in the middle, still holding each other up with one arm while using their free ones to give peace signs. Once situated, all six flashed their brightest smiles as the jellyfish raised Pearl's phone.

"Okay, guys! Ready? Say 'booyah'!" chirped Pearl.

"BOOYAH!" they chimed as the camera shutter clicked.

Pearl ran back over to the jellyfish as he returned her phone to study the shot. "Ha ha, swag! That came out great! Thanks!" Her thumbs busily typed across its screen. "Lemme post this on Squitter real quick, then I'll send it to y'all!"

"Thanks for the photo op, guys," said Marie. "Means a lot to us. Really."

"Yeah!" added Callie. "It's not everyday you get your picture taken with psychic humans from an intergalactic fighting organization! Like, really! What're the odds?!"

Marina looked over the fatigued boys with a knowing smile. "And after all this excitement, something tells me you're looking forward to some rest and relaxation. Come on, let's get you back to the green room for now."

Ness nodded. "Took the words right outta my mouth."

"Thank you. We really appreciate it..." sighed Lucas.

As the idols led them offstage, the blonde was carefully watched by a pair of eyes through what remained of the curtains. Afraid they'd be seen, they quickly jerked the drapes shut as he walked by. Behind them was a pining Orange, lowering her head in remorse. She wanted so badly to tell Lucas how proud of him she was, but also didn't want to crowd him after such an arduous battle. What he needed more than anything was a good rest, causing her to sigh longingly as she let him go.

The loud buzzer from earlier sounded, informing all stagehands the show was officially finished. It also snapped Orange out of her stupor.

Turning around, she addressed the crew. "All right, ladies and gents, that's a wrap! Good job today, thanks for all the help, and, uh, props all around. You earned it."

Orange wasn't the best at giving kudos, but it was enough for the staff to celebrate with a round of applause, handshakes, and some scattered "booyahs" for a hard day's work.

She removed her headset, now free of her directorial duties. "Guess there's nothing left but to clean this joint up then, huh? May as well help you get started..."

"What?" asked Green.

She frowned. "Whaddya mean 'what'? Show's over. Time to clean up. You think Imma let you chumps off scot free just 'cuz I gave you a pat on the back?"

"No, not that, but..." He studied her dubiously. "Did you just say you were going to help us?"

"Yeah, so?! You got a problem with that?!" she challenged. "The place practically got blown sky high, so you're gonna need all the help you can get fixing it! If I leave you chowderheads alone, I bet you'll end up trashing it even more!"

"Oh. Well..." Surprised, but appreciative, Green smiled. "Sure, we'd love to have you help."

"Of course you'd love to have me help!" scoffed Orange, putting hands on her hips. "So let's stop gawking and start cleaning already! S'gonna take all night if we don't start hauling ass, sheesh!"

Snapping to attention, the group responded with an obedient, "Yes, ma'am!" before scattering. Within moments, they were dutifully tending to the catastrophic mess any way they could. It would be slow going with the amount of destruction left behind, but if they could set it up to look awesome, they could clean it up to look awesome.

Surveying the scene to make sure no one was slacking off, Orange gauged everyone's chores to see what she could start off with. Noticing a pair of Octolings struggle with lifting the battered backdrop, she decided they could use a hand and approached them.

Seeing her coming, the boys panicked and tried harder to pick up the wall, but to no avail. Instead, their combined fear caused them to lose their grip, toppling the whole thing over. Horrified, their hands flew to their mouths as Orange blankly stared at the fallen backdrop.

In response to this, the old Orange would yelled at them for making an even bigger mess while they were trying to clean up, called them wimps for not being able to lift a styrofoam prop, spitefully kicked it off the stage in order to "help" them out, and then forced them down there to finish the job without any extra assistance as punishment for their weakness.

The pair knew full well they'd messed up, already cowering as they awaited the Inkling's fury.

But this was the new Orange, and she had something a little different in mind.

She looked back at them. "You boys need some help?"

Humbled and stupefied by her offer, they pitifully nodded, still wary of her intentions.

"Well, how's about you knuckleheads get on the other side and lift while I pick up over here? Can't be that heavy, right?"

The two looked at each other in astonishment before, fearful that she'd change her tone, agreed with a hurried, "Sure thing, right away!" and scrambled into position.

"All right," called Orange, "on three! 1... 2... 3!"

On her command, the trio lifted the wall with no problem. As the confused, but gracious Octolings led the way offstage, Orange resigned to her fate and sighed. Menial labor was the last thing she wanted to do, but it was the right thing to do.

Lucas wouldn't have wanted it any other way.