Chapter 14: Gone Fishing
*KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK*
For its third repetition, that insufferable knocking continued to piss off Thaelin to the point he had to do something about it. The ranger's eye's burned in the light of the new day. He shielded his vision from the bright morning sunlight shining its way in through the windows next to the hearth. After a long night of beheading the ghoul woman, he was incredibly sore from the fight that ensued.
"Mr Fridulf! I know you're in there! Open this damned door this instant!" Came a shrewish voice from his boarding room.
The man rolled out of bed and stumbled towards the door. His legs were stiff as they shambled to the door. He didn't worry about putting on pants, in his lazy mindset. His long sleeved shirt that stretched down to his kneed as sufficient.
"Yeah? What do you want?" he said flinging the door open. "Its 12 in the afternoon, some of us are trying to sleep."
Not to his surprise, Their landlady, Madame Glassgate was on the other end. And it was clear as day, she was in a more foul mood than normal. Her perpetual scowl worsened when she looked up and saw the man in only his shirt
"Shteln etlekhe hoyzn, ir ekldik nebekhl!" the old Halfling woman said averting her eyes to the undressed man.
Thaelin smirked as her answered in the Halfling language "Demolt ton nit kukn."
"Mr. Fridulf!" the old Halfling woman scowled at the degenerate tenant "You and Mrs Prynn are late on your rent…AGAIN!"
The man rubbed the sleep from his eyes, leaned against the door frame, and let out a yawn. "Well, I will have you know that I have your rent, right fucking here."
The man left the door ajar as he retreated back into the room and retrieved the coinpurse he was 'rewarded' from the previous night. He poured out a few coins and counted out a 50 gold coins as per their usual rent. He would harass Hastur later about how now she owned him for paying rent.
Whilst his back was turned, the old shrew crept inside the two's shared living space. Her pointed nose was turned upside to the less than savory living conditions a respectable mage like Hastur would subject herself to. She pitied the poor girl for being forced to live with the degenerate like Thaelin. When she swiveled her head over to the ranger's side of the room, the sight was enough to make her stomach churn.
"Bwah!" gasped the landlady "What in the Nine Hells have you done to this room?!"
"What?" the man turned and shrugged not finding any fault with his living conditions.
"Why did you bring such ghastly articles in my building? And furthermore, why are they hanging upon this wall?" she demanded while placing a hand over her mouth. She was clearly distraught by the visage of souvenirs the man had collected after a while.
"Those are my trophies." He put bluntly
"Trophies? There is nothing of merit here, sir. Only disgusting oddities and macabre curios. I demand you remove them at once. Or I shall have you and Mrs. Prynn vacated from this premises post haste!"
The man gave the old halfling a sarcastic chuckle and then crossed his arms. "Like hell you will. I'm a ranger, ya hear?" the man began to circle around the land lady. "I've been killing things that would use your bones as chew toys, since I was a boy."
He then started to list off the story behind each of the mementos. In graphic detail to best paint the landlady a clear portrait of his exploits
"Those ears," he pointed to the garlands hanging by a slim tack, "those were taken from a war band of the most ugly goblins you would have seen in the Dwarven outskirts of Dueh Lobeer. Those slimy green freaks were pillaging every mine they could stumble upon. Most of them I smashed their heads in with clumps of the iron ore itself."
The man then turned to the roughly crafted giant's club in the corner. "On the northern most part of Kessier Forest there was a giantess slaughtering attacking pilgrims on their way from the mountains. In the dead of night, I snuck into her camp, while she was asleep I crept into her bed and cut her throat wide open. I saw the fear in her eyes as she tried to reach for that club. Her bloody handprints are still on the grip."
Thaelin smirked as she started to see the halfling woman quaking in her shoes. For added measure, he decided to spill out the rest of the coins from the ghoul victim's coinpurse and hang the drawstring on a bare peg "I just got this last night. I don't want to tell you exactly what it was, but lets just say it was something that walked the streets just like you and I."
Madame Glassgate gave a nervous gulp. She motioned towards the door wishing to never lay eyes on such a putrid display again. "M-Mr. Fridulf. I don't wish to see those trinkets ever again. If you feel the urge to bring one into this building, b-be sure I don't see it."
The man stood back and watched the landlady quiver in fear, but a part of him started to feel guilty over his joke.
"Yes, Madame Glassgate."
Once left alone with his collection of artifacts, Thaelin scratched at his beard before trying to go back to sleep. The bell tower in the center of Hayak struck once before its usual chimes followed. The cries of merchants echoed upwards. The loud blurts from a team of mules rattled the glass panes of the windows. Thaelin tried to bury his head under his pillow, but to no avail. The man got dressed, grabbed his canvas knapsack, and started to pack away a few provisions for a days trip.
He left the hustle and bustle of the city for the peaceful tranquility of the forest. Given his chosen profession, he felt at one with the woods just as much as he did in the city. It was a second home for him. And this trip was just what he needed.
About a mile or two from the trade roads, Thaelin weaved his way through the rough growth of trees to one of his favorite secluded spots along the river. It was secluded, and most importantly free from noise. The gentle current drowned out any unwanted sounds.
On the river bank an old cane fishing pole rest onto a notched stick. The single fishing line was gently stretched out into the water. A man in a worn and ragged outfit sat on the riverbank looking over his spot. His back leaning against an old log of dried-out driftwood. He sat comfortably still. Paying no heed to the rustling sounds of an incoming soul to his private fishing hole. From the brushes behind him, Thaelin emerged and greeted his fellow fisherman.
"Hey Bones, how you doing? Don't get up on my account." He said with a chuckle.
The ranger dropped his knapsack into the sand bank a respectable distance away from the other fisherman. He retrieved a waxed linen spool of fishing line from a tin case and prepared his line. Poking its head up from the earth, Thaelin plucked a long stringy worm from its hole, and skewered half of it onto his hook for bait. The ranger then tossed his fishing line into the river and sat back, his back rested on the end of the same piece of driftwood. He closed his eyes at the peaceful world around him: The babbling stream, the songs of nearby robins building their nests, the cool shady foliage covering them, and the gentle pull of the line as the current drags his hook down river. This was the peace he so desperately desired. The man looked to his side and gave a friendly grin to his stoic neighbor
"Bones, I gotta say. I envy you, buddy. You get to spend all day here. You don't have a single worry. Lucky bastard. How you been dude? Catch anything?""
The fisherman didn't reply. His sunken eyes were looking on at the river. Thaelin chuckled at the silence while he untied his boots. He outstretched his toes and dug his heels in the firm damp sand
"That's why I like you, Bones. You don't talk much. Life in the city has been rough. Yesterday I killed this ghoul-thing that took a bite out of her sugar daddy. Shot her in the neck and that only pissed her off. You should have been there dude, Chased me into a dark alley and I curb stomped that bitch. It was fucking awesome. Man, monsters are getting ballsy these days. I mean she was inside the town. Snuggled up real close to this noble before trying to make him into a manwich. But enough of work talk."
The second fisherman kept still like a statue, paying no heed to the man. Thaelin nodded his head as he kept on talking
"You remember Hastur? She's that elf roommate of mine I told you about. Anyway she got this cushy job at her church thing, and she's been doing a lot more of her churchy stuff." the man pursed his lips and looked on at the flowing river "She hasn't gone on a single bounty job with me in a long time. She's too busy. Gotta say I miss her."
The ranger shook the melancholy from his head. "Bones, we've known each other for a while now. You don't talk much, and I respect that. You have been a good friend. You listen and you don't judge. But I just gotta ask. What am I doing wrong? I'm twenty-six years old and I'm barely scraping by here. I kill monsters and what do I get in return? Not a single thanks. Just a couple scars, a pouch of silver, and nothing. Maybe my sister was right. I should stop being such a slacker."
A silent half hour went by. Thaelin pulled in his line, recast it, and sat back thinking about his more stories to tell his friend. Bones continued to lounge against the log. He stayed perfectly contempt where he was.
"Oh, Get this, Bones. Myshka is in Hayak. That's right, the bear, herself. And she joined up with those self-righteous pricks, The Militia. Can you believe that shit?"
Before the fisherman could answer, Thaelin went back to his monologue.
"I don't know Bones, should I talk to her? I mean what would I even say? 'Hey Myshka, please don't punch my face in, but wanna go out sometime?' Its been years since we separated , but I still miss her, ya know? That beautiful blue hair, the way she can scare the shit out of you one minute, then kiss you the next, and that nice ass of hers." he said with a nostalgic chuckle "Absence makes the heart grow fonder right?"
"Did I tell you one time, Myshka and I were at this backwater tavern in Yurn Tabil? These guys were giving her shit over her being a woman fighter. They said dumb shit like, 'How can you swing yer sword when ya got such great tits in the way? How about I hold them for ya?' needless to say, myska got so pissed she charged up to the blowhard, grabbed him by the pecker and said ' I cant imagine it being hard walking with something so tiny in your way. Maybe I should cut it off? That guy was so scared he-"
A strong jerk came from the deep river. The waxed line became taught and Thaelin jumped to life. He gave the line a fierce tug to set the iron hook into whatever was on the other end.
"-Hold that thought, Bones!"
The ranger wrapped the line around his hands and pulled with all his might. The fine jute cord dug into his hands. Whatever he had snagged, it was big.
"Your ass is mine, bitch!" The ranger laughed wading out into the river at knee depth. He loosened his grip slightly to give the line slack before wrapping his hands around the cord again to reel the fish in. The fisherman flexed his muscles as he pulled on the cord. The shimmering suns reflection blinded the man's eyesight briefly before he walked closer into the river. His eyes widened with excitement. His catch was going to be a real treat for the table, and its skull will make a good trophy. In a shallow portion of the riverbed. The ranger could finally make out the outline of his opponent. And it was indeed big. Very big.
A green body and yellow speckled flank flashed upwards, it was then that Thaelin realized he was facing a larger catch than he expected.
"Oh shit! Bones!"
A dozen needle like teeth clenched onto the fisherman's leg and wiggled its massive head vigorously before it started to swim down stream. Bones sat on the edge of the river watching on as he always did. He saw as Thaelin be dragged underwater by the large water beast. The ranger's cries for help went unanswered. A few gasped bubbles of air rose to the surface, then Thaelin's arm flew upwards flailing wildly before going back under. The peace and stillness of the fishing hole returned for a few uninterrupted moments. A few times did Thaelin's head breach the surface, gasping for breath before beigh dragged back under. and once or twice did the fish's massive rounded tail splash upwards, fanning a large wave that lapped against the shore.
Not far down stream, did the man's feet get a chance to catch against a shallower part of the river and dig into the murky bottom. He pulled against the current to the point he felt his muscles were going to tear. He flung his head above the surface and gasped for breath. He wasn't going to let go. This was the catch of a lifetime.
"Oh no you don't, bitch!" the man yelled before diving back down.
His battle waged on and he finally got to a point where he could wear out the mighty fish. He wrestled with its muscular body. Using a sunken rocky crevice as leverage, he pulled in the massive fish. The extremely muscular creature circled back around and started to swim back towards the man.
Thaelin couldn't see much in the greenish tinged water, but he could, without a doubt, see the beast charging after him. Its toothy maw held open ready to try to bite and tear his flesh a second time. At the last minute, he swam aside just missing the needle-like teeth and reached back to grab ahold of its bony gills. He held on for dear life as the water-beast swam up river. He couldnt help but smile at the sight no one would ever believe. The way he was holding onto the fish, he thought he looked like he was riding thing like a horse.
"Okay, lets end this, bitch." he said coming up for his final gasp of breath. He wrestled with the fish, throwing punch after punt at the creature's head until it would stop wiggling and diving back down into the deeper parts of the stream. Once it seemed well tired, he hopped off his aquatic stead and he tried to make his way for the riverbank. The current dragged him and the fish back down stream a couple dozen yards from his and Bones' spot. Trudging towards the shore, the ranger heaved the massive Pike over his shoulder
Every part of him was soaking wet and a large bite mark on his leg was leaving a bloody trail behind him but he didn't care. He won. That's all that mattered to him.
"Ha! Yer gonna make a great fillet tonight, you ugly bitch!" cheered Thaelin dragging the mighty Pike to the shore.
The Pike fish were a rather aggressive and hearty breed of fish that swam through the rivers of the North. Roughly five feet in length and weighing almost 30lbs, the massive fish flopped on the shore. Its long muscular olive green body was speckled with yellow dots. Its snout was long and almost beak-like, similar to a salmon, the most terrifying about it was the teeth. Dozens of cone shaped teeth filled its massive jaw.
Thaelin dragged the fish far up onto the sand bank and went back to resting against the driftwood backrest. Words couldn't describe his enjoyment. Almost being drowned by a massive fish was a great thrill to him. His life was never boring. There was always going to be a greater beast just around the corner wanting to take a bite out of him.
The young man reached into his knapsack and retrieved a small leather flask. He took a quick swig of the strong smelling alcohol to celebrate his latest victory.
"Thanks for the help, Bones! Couldn't have done it without you." the ranger laughed sarcastically. "Here, drink up buddy."
Thaelin placed the mouth of the flask to the exposed mandible of the still fisherman next to him. The dark amber liquid washed over the bare bone and shriveled pieces of dried flesh still clinging to skull. The droplets of rum poured down the remains and soaked into the tattered pieces of cloth still worn by the cadaver. Thin bony fingers still cradled the old cane rod.
Thaelin grabbed ahold of Bones' cane fishing pole and reeled in the line. He baited the bare hook with his other half of worm and cast it out into the river. "Good luck buddy."
