Yes I am so sorry it again has been over six months since the last update but here I am with a 5000 word long chapter hoping to make up for it. I'm almost at the end, I think we're three chapters off the finish line after this one and I do plan to finish this story still! It just may take some time. Thank you as always for being such loyal readers and please keep reviewing it really does give me the motivation to continue!

Anyway, here we go.


Disclaimer: I still do not own this story.


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~~~o~~o~~~

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Bitter Silence

The house wasn't the same to him any more. The large rooms, which once felt so bright, were now just empty spaces. The quiet dojo, which once felt so alive, was now a reminder of everything that he'd lost.

Shinpachi passed through the empty halls, taking in the silence that surrounded him, accompanied only by his echoing footsteps and his even breath. The brown haired boy came to a gentle stop in front of an alter containing two photographs.

"Hi Mum. Hi Dad." The boy greeted the photographs, coming to kneel slowly before them, "Happy New Years."

Shinpachi took his time arranging the offerings placed before the pictures, methodically cleaning out any dust that had built up over the last few weeks.

While completing this task, the boy spoke to the pictures absently, "Takachin hasn't got any plans for the future, he thinks he's going to become the president of the Otsu Fan Club as a career. Kagura-Chan's going to University in the city, I think Sougo-Kun is planning to follow her there just to annoy her. Well, he is obsessed with her as well, which I guess has something to do with his decision too. Gintoki's wedding was an absolute disaster; you should've seen it, I ended up with bruises all over my body from the brawl that erupted at the reception! And Nee-chan…"

The brown haired boy trailed off, not knowing what to say when it came to his sister. Shinpachi was very proud of his sister and how hard she worked to support them, but he knew his parent's would be sad she had to work instead of study and chase her dreams.

"Tae-Onee-Sama is living proudly each day with the help of her little brother!" Tae declared loudly from behind Shinpachi, having entered the room at some point without his knowledge.

The powerful woman approached the alter gradually, coming to kneel next to her younger brother. Tae placed her hands together and bowed her head in respect in front of the pictures, "we are doing just fine, I promise." Tae spoke the last part softly.

Shinpachi took a moment to appreciate his sister and found himself having to take a deep breath to calm his emotions. Instead, the boy placed his hands together in a similar manner to his sister and reiterated her statement, "we're doing better than fine!"

"And we'll be even better once I graduate and restart the dojo!" Shinpachi declared proudly. "Wish us luck for another year, Mum, Dad."

The two siblings bowed their head one final time before standing up and slowly exiting the room, turning the light off behind them as they went.

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~~~o~~o~~~

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Insect

"HERPES ME!"

Sougo heard the shrill scream followed by a loud thud come from the apartment next door. The flaxen haired teenager threw himself out of his chair and sprinted over to the Sakata's house as quickly as he could in response to the panicked scream emitted by his childhood friend.

While the boy had feared he would find a burglary or murder scene before him he instead found the red haired girl cowering in a corner pointing desperately at the far counter in her kitchen.

"Bug! Bug! BUG!" The girl repeated, pointing wildly at what appeared to be a small spider building a web on the counter closest to the fridge in the kitchen.

"You screamed bloody murder over a spider?" The boy sighed incredulously.

"What do you mean a spider?" Kagura's voice was wild with panic, "that thing is huge!"

Sougo sighed again, walking calmly into the kitchen towards the counter.

"Be careful!" Shouted the girl from behind him.

Sougo rolled his eyes while removing his slipper. Sougo bent down to get a good look at the spider, it was brown and very obviously a Daddy Long Legs, therefore definitely not harmful.

Sougo coaxed the spider onto his slipper, trying his best not to have it attach to his hand with its web. After a few moments of struggling to sweep the spider onto his slipper he finally succeeded and stood up swiftly. The boy took the spider and quickly approached the red headed girl who yelped in fear, "get that thing away from me!" She squealed.

"Come on, China." Taunted the boy, "you're not scared of a little itty bitty spider, are you?"

"Get lost, Sadist! You're disgusting! You and that spider belong together all sticky and gross you're basically sisters!"

"Brothers you mean, China." Sougo deadpanned, waving the Daddy Long Legs in Kagura's face.

"Shut up, Chihuahua!" The red headed girl spat, "just take it outside already, it's looking at me with it's ten eyes!"

The flaxen haired boy smirked, "spiders have eight eyes, everyone knows that. I guess they don't teach pig's things like that." Sougo responded, eventually backing towards the door and taking the spider outside.

Only, Sougo didn't realise that at some point while he was taunting the China girl that the spider had dropped off his slipper and scurried out of sight somewhere in the apartment.

"Um, China?"

"Yes, you stupid Sadist?"

"I lost the spider."

"You what?"

"It's somewhere in the apartment."

"Find it now!"

As Kagura shouted the last part Sougo saw her face go pale, "what?" Sougo asked.

"I found the spider." The girl replied, pointing silently at Sougo's face, "it's on your head."

Sougo swiftly sprinted from the apartment and jumped around until he was sure the spider was well and truly gone while the China girl fretted around him in fear.

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~~~o~~o~~~

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Memories Part 1

Her small hand was completely engulfed in the tall man's as he carefully led her up the stairs of the unknown apartment building. Upon reaching the top the man ushered her down the walkway, until they came to stop in front of a door midway down. The man crouched down to the little girls level and said, "We're here, Kagura."

The man stood up again and turned to open the door slowly, before walking inside ahead of her.

The little girl with the orange hair wasn't sure what was happening or why she was here but she'd met the tall man a few weeks earlier at her old home with her Papi. He had strange silver hair but he didn't look old, it confused Kagura, she thought only old men had white hair.

"Kagura?" Asked the man – Gintoki, he had told her but she couldn't bring herself to call his name out for some reason – noticing that she hadn't moved from in front of the door. "It's ok, you're safe here."

The small girl frowned at the man, investigating the door thoroughly to check for hazards, before finally taking the first step into the apartment.

The apartment was normal by all means, nothing special to distinguish it from any other house in Tokyo.

Smaller than my house, the girl thought in passing.

Once again, the tall man with the strange white hair was waiting for her, letting her take her time to become familiar with her current surroundings.

After a few moments he continued onwards into the apartment, "this way, Kagura."

The girl followed him in deeper into the apartment, becoming more confident in her steps as she went on.

The man came to a halt in front of another open doorway.

The girl tried to peer inside but he was blocking the way with his legs.

He crouched down to the child's level again to make eye contact, "this is your room, Kagura."

Kagura moved to go around the man and slowly entered the room. At first glance it was simple: a bed, a bedside table with a lamp, a wardrobe. However, if you looked closer you would notice that everything in the room was pink. Furthermore, there was a dollhouse in the corner and if you looked up you could see there were stars on the ceiling clearly intended for the little girl.

"My room?" Kagura spoke for the first time, addressing the man with the silver hair.

Looking directly at the girl he smiled softly, "Yes, this is your room, Kagura."

"My room" the girl repeated, looking around again.

Several moments passed where the little girl walked around her new room with curiosity and nerves while the older man watched silently from his seated position on the floor. After a long period of time, the man watched Kagura walk nervously towards him and take hold of his shirtsleeve.

The little girl was visibly working hard to muster up the courage to address the strange man directly. She took a deep breath, looking down at the ground she spoke softly, "what happened to my other room?"

The man watched her as he responded levelly, "it's still there," he said slowly, "but there's no one there right now to look after you, so I brought you here instead."

"Where is my dad?" The girl asked this time.

The older man looked towards the ceiling for a moment contemplating his next answer. He looked back towards the girl who was still staring at the floor intently, "I'm not sure, but he isn't at home right now." The man slouched down lower to try and catch the little girls gaze, "I promise I will always be here, though. As long as you want me to be."

The little girl lifted her head then and made eye contact with the man shyly, "are you going to be my dad now?"

The man took a moment to respond, again trying not to startle the girl, "I'm not your dad exactly, or not at all if you don't want me to be. I will be the one taking care of you from now, though. So if you want to call me your dad or brother or friend, I'll be happy with whatever you choose."

The little girl tilted her head, seemingly contemplating the notion. She fixed her wide azure eyes on the man's, "can I call you Gin-chan?"

"Sure, Kagura."

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~~~o~~o~~~

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Alone/dark

One thing Kagura had realised since becoming a senior was that upon every chance someone in her grade would throw a party. There had the typical parties thrown by various people including "End of Summer", "Start of Senior Year" and "Last Week Before Exam Prep". However, there had also been some parties that just seemed a bit of a stretch to Kagura, especially the one for "Gintoki-Sensei said something nice to a student". While some would say Kagura doesn't appear to be much of the partying type, other's who know Kagura a lot better would say that is entirely false and the red headed girl loved a party, just not the typical "teen rager" her classmates seemed to throw repeatedly.

This particular party, though, was being held by her friend Hiroshi to celebrate everyone officially having their results back from Universities and being a month away from graduation.

Kagura had arrived at the party a little over an hour ago with her usual group and Zaki for some reason whom had disappeared the moment they arrived after spotting Kagura's old boss, Tama-san, who he still had a huge crush on. Nobume and Soyo-Chan had blended into the crowd early on, making fun of some of the boys in attendance from another school that weren't aware of their sadistic reputation. Shinpachi had hunted down Taka-chin to discuss Otsu-chan's new single, Your Grandmother Wears Your Sneakers. Meanwhile the Sadist had been MIA after declaring he was going to get a drink and swiftly disappearing into the crowd. Kagura suspected he was off to find Zaki and ruin his chances with Tama-san to amuse himself.

That left Kagura alone with the host of the party himself, Hiroshi, who was very engrossed in some story he was telling about a new radio exercise program for teenagers starting in the park.

"Uh-huh, sounds cool" Kagura said monotonously for the fifth time, Hiroshi hadn't appeared to cotton on to her completely zoning out of the conversation a while ago yet.

The red headed girl was instead surveying the crowd searching for any sign of the Sadi- wait no she wasn't. Kagura was most definitely not ignoring a nice boy who was eager to win her attention to search for the stupid brat, uh-huh. Kagura was just making sure she was ready to take action if he was tormenting some poor innocent girl at the party.

Kagura turned her head quickly to look at the boy next to her, "do you want to go get some food? I'm hungry!" Kagura asked.

Hiroshi seemed caught off guard, having been interrupted from his story, "there's mini hotdogs in the kitchen?"

Kagura nodded her head eagerly and took off in the direction of the kitchen, which the boy took as a sign to follow her.

"Sorry, what was that story you were telling me again?" Kagura asked after reaching the kitchen and shoving three mini hotdogs in her mouth consecutively.

"Uh…" Hiroshi stared blankly at Kagura stuffing hotdogs in her mouth and snapped back to attention, "yes! So they have radio exercises every monday night in the park just for teenagers, how cool is that?"

"So cool," Kagura replied absently.

"Yeah! So I was thinking that maybe, if you're free, that you could come with me next time. I could pick you up from your house and we could have tea before hand, only if you want to! And maybe we could go see a-"

Kagura stopped listening as she had caught sight of the Sadist who was currently standing behind Shinpachi was who crouched over a body yelling, "This guy needs to go to hospital! Can anyone drive?"

Kagura frowned and began walking over to the scene when Shinpachi turned to face Sougo, "Sougo-kun you can drive."

The Sadist shook his head, "can't, been drinking."

Shinpachi scrunched up his brow, "no you haven't, I know you don't drink at public parties. Now drive this guy to the hospital!"

"Don't want to."

"SOUGO-KUN!"

The flaxen haired boy rolled his eyes and signed, "fine, but if he bleeds on my seats he's paying for it."

"What's going on?" Came Hiroshi's voice behind Kagura.

"What?" Kagura asked, shocked from concentrating so hard on the scene playing out before her. "Oh, I think someone's going to the hospital."

"Damn! The police might come now and ask questions." Hiroshi muttered before turning to the crowd, "Ok, parties over everyone go home!"

A collective grumbling came from the crowd who were just getting into the swing of things as Hiroshi said to Kagura gently, "sorry the party had to end early I just can't have the cops showing up my parents will kill me. That guy should be ok though."

Kagura nodded in response, still only half paying attention as she watched Sougo lead a group of guys to his car supporting the unconscious person.

"Um, Hiroshi?" Kagura grabbed hold of the boy's shirt suddenly.

The boy blinked in surprise, "yes?"

"Can I stay here until they get back? The Sadist drove me here and I don't want to have to call Gin-chan to come pick me up so I'll just wait for him."

Hiroshi appeared pleased by the question, "Yeah, for sure stay as long as you want."

"Cool, great."

"If you want we can go upst-"

"Where's your TV?" Kagura cut the boy off and followed him into the lounge room after he responded to her question.

The red headed girl blatantly ignored the boy accompanying her for the next hour while they watched TV and waited for the group of boys to come back. Shinpachi, Soyo-Chan and Nobume had hung around for a bit but ultimately left once they got bored.

After an hour and a half passed Kagura was alerted by the front door slamming. A few moments later the group of boys who had attended the hospital with Sougo re-entered the room, "aw man, did the party end?" A tall boy with mousy brown hair asked.

"Yeah, had to send everyone home before the cops came." Replied Hiroshi.

"Ah, that sucks! Guess we'll go home then."

"Better luck next time bro."

"Where's the Sadist?" Kagura interrupted the boys.

"Excuse me?" One asked.

"The Sadist. Tall, brown hair, creepy red eyes. The one who drove you to the hospital."

"Oh, that dude!" The tall boy nodded, irritating Kagura in the process, "he stayed at the hospital."

"What?"

"Yeah, someone had to stay with that guy and he was the one with the car so…"

"You left him there?"

"Yeah? What's the big deal?"

"What's the big deal? Are you serious?" Kagura demanded angrily.

Hiroshi came to stand between Kagura and the group of boys in an attempt to calm her down, "Whoa, whoa it's ok. We'll go get him in the morning he'll be fine."

"No! We can't 'get him in the morning' we have to get him now!" Kagura said frantically, "I can't believe you left him there!"

"Kagura, he'll be fine one night alone." Hiroshi continued.

"No he won't, you don't understand he can't be alone there!" The girl's bright azure eyes looked worried and were clearly on the verge on tears.

"Ok, I'll take you." Hiroshi said calmly, gesturing towards the shed door, "let's go."

Kagura sat in a state of distress the entire ride to the hospital, muttering, "I promised him, stupid Sadist," to herself occasionally.

When the pair arrived at the hospital they immediately found Sougo sitting by himself in the ER, the rest of the room completely deserted at this time of night. The flaxen haired boy looked completely dejected with his shoulders slack and head dropped into his hands.

Hiroshi watched as the red headed girl ran over to the lonesome boy and crouched down in front of him.

"You stupid Sadist, why are you sitting in the dark?" Kagura demanded, the bite in her words completely lost in her frantic tone.

The despondent boy raised his head slowly to level with Kagura's and asked, "China?"

Kagura dropped her shoulders and smiled softly at the Sadist, "Yeah, it's me."

Hiroshi saw the boy's entire body relax upon seeing the girl in front of him as he hung his head on her shoulder.

"It's ok now." Kagura said, brushing her hand through his hair, "why did you stay here alone, you know you don't ever have to wait in the hospital again."

"I wasn't alone, I knew you'd come." Sougo said into her shoulder.

Hiroshi backed out of the room slowly and thought strongly to himself, there's no way I can get in-between that, leaving the two teenagers in that position in the dark Emergency Room.

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~~~o~~o~~~

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Heartfelt Apology

Around 2am Gintoki had called Kagura in a panic, waking up and realising she still wasn't home only to then hear from her that she was at the hospital. It was at this point that Gintoki hung up on Kagura and rushed to the hospital in a mad panic, not taking the time to take off his pyjamas.

"Oh no." Kagura mumbled.

"What?" Asked the flaxen haired boy beside her.

"I think Gin-chan is going to storm in here in about ten minutes freaking out."

Sougo snorted, clearly picturing the image, "that's what you get for leading with 'I'm at the hospital'."

"Well he asked!" Kagura retorted in indignation, lifting her head to stare at the Sadist.

Sougo merely smiled in response and went back to his slouched position on the chair.

The two teenagers had barely moved since Kagura arrived at the hospital other than for her to move into a seat next to the boy. Gradually, the red headed girl had begun to lean on her companion, resting her head against his shoulder due to exhaustion. He hadn't mentioned it or moved to protest so she stayed.

After raising her head to answer her phone the girl became acutely aware of the closeness off the position and was much too awkward to resume it.

Kagura stood up swiftly instead, moving her limbs around to shake off the tiredness. "Hospitals are so creepy at night time!" She exclaimed.

There was no response from the flaxen haired boy so she continued to break the silence, "they're just so big and white! But I haven't seen a cleaner go through here since I've been here!"

When the boy still didn't acknowledge her statement she continued, "and the smell!"

"You don't have to keep rambling, China." Sougo finally spoke, "I'm aware how awkward this situation is."

"Oh…" Kagura mumbled.

Sougo sighed deeply and sat up straight in his chair, "What I should say is sorry."

"Say what now?" Kagura responded, unsure if she'd hurt correctly.

"I said." Sougo exaggerated out the two words, rolling his eyes in the process, "that I am sorry."

The girl frowned, "why?" She asked, genuinely confused.

Kagura didn't realise she'd moved closer to the Sadist so when he moved his bright red eyes up to look directly into hers she was taken aback, "I'm sorry you had to leave the party and I'm sorry I made you worried."

It took Kagura a moment to respond as she was mesmerised by the Sadist's eyes, "uh…" she trailed off, shaking her head, "It's fine."

Sougo nodded in response and continued to stare up at the girl, "stop doing that!"

"Doing what?"

"Staring at me, it's creepy!" Kagura looked away sharply, "You don't have to apologise anyway, it's gross coming from you."

Kagura heard the boy snort, "Noted." He responded distantly.

The boy's heartfelt apology had made Kagura feel itchy but it did occur to her that she might finally have the advantage over the boy. That was until against her better judgement caused her to ask for answers to his meek attitude. "What did you mean earlier when you said you knew I would come?"

Sougo responded instantly with a lazy shrug, "because you know me better than anyone." Kagura heard the implication in his words that she knew about why he was so fragile in hospitals as well. What she was really stuck on was the 'better than anyone' part of Sougo's statement.

"I'm sure Shinpachi and Zaki would've been just as worried, they've known you longer than I have." Kagura deflected the conversation.

Sougo continued to look at Kagura with those clear eyes as he responded, "I didn't say you knew me the longest, I said you know me the best. Just like I know you, China."

Kagura began to feel claustrophobic, "Why do you keep saying things like that?"

"Why? Something making you feel nervous, China?" Sougo asked absently.

"What? No!" Kagura demanded, "I just want to go to bed, I'm tired!"

"We're both tired." Sougo stated from below Kagura, "I'd be even worse off if you hadn't come here to see me." Kagura wasn't even sure if Sougo intended for her to hear the last part he said it so quietly.

"Phew, when is Gin-chan going to get here, uh-huh!" Kagura babbled urgently, "If this was a manga he'd burst through the door right n-"

The girl was unable to finish her sentence as her foster father burst through the hospital front doors in haste, "Kagura! What happened? Did Sorouchi-kun try to kill you again?"

"Gin-chan!" Kagura yelled, running towards her foster dad for a hug, "I wanna go home!" She wailed.

"What's going on?" Gintoki looked around the waiting room urgently. Unable to find any other potential sources of danger his eyes rested on the seated boy, "what did you do?"

Sougo raised his eyebrows, "nothing, a random guy at Hitoka's party passed out and I had to drive him here."

"Hiroshi!" Kagura corrected, turning her attention towards Gintoki, "I came to make sure the little Brat wasn't crying."

Gintoki nodded, patting Kagura on top of the head like a small puppy, "good girl, you have such a kind heart."

Sougo rolled his eyes at the idiot father-daughter display, standing up abruptly, "you taking us home now?"

"Who's taking who home?" Gintoki and Kagura asked in unison.

"I'm sick of waiting here, I don't know why I even did for so long I don't care what happens to that guy." Sougo continued.

"Why didn't you just drive us home hours ago if that's the case?" Kagura demanded.

Sougo shrugged, "Zaki came and took my car."

"So you weren't really lonely, you just didn't have a ride home!"

"No, I did appreciate the company, China."

"You Sadist!" Kagura yelled at the boy.

"Come now children." Gintoki said loudly, crashing quickly now that he was sure his daughter was safe and wanting to return home to bed, "it doesn't matter who took who's car let's just go home so I can get my beauty sleep."

"But he made me feel sorry for him, Gin-chan!" Kagura wailed, following her dad to the car.

"I know," he responded, patting her head once again, "I know."

However, upon arriving at the apartment complex and heading up the stairs Sougo stopped the girl for a second.

"China?" The flaxen haired boy said softly.

"Yes?" Kagura asked, turning away from the door, which Gin-chan had already sprinted through towards his bedroom.

The boy's figure was hard to make out in the darkness, the moonlight only providing dim backlighting. Kagura could see his red eyes as plain as day, though, staring unwaveringly into her own azure eyes, "I really am sorry."

Sougo closed the door behind him quietly and left Kagura reeling on the landing in the cold night air.

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~~~o~~o~~~

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Thanks for reading!

Please review and let me know what you thought and if you're still enjoying the story!

As always

Love Hils

xoxoxoxoxo