This entire thing Is gonna be in jake's POV because its just easier

Jake's POV:

"Attention squad, today I the most important day in the history of this precinct for today, is halloween" I start then realise I was the only one talking. "I thought we were going to say it together" I say looking over at Captain holt. "I never agreed to that" he states simply then looks over to the squad.

"All right, as you my know for the past two years Captain holt and I have engaged in an epic battle of wits, the goal: to determine who must call the other amazing detective/ genius" I announced to the squad.

"the first year by sheer, dumb luck, Jake eeked out a feeble victory" The captain explained. "and last year I let the captain win because he's old and sad" I stated. "sad because the competition was so dismissal" he adds.

"this year's the tiebreaker, a final heist to decide once and for all the true kind of the nine-nine" I stated, "halloween heist III: The heisting, tagline?". "this year, we both attempt to steal the same object instead of Jake attempting to steal one from me" The captain explains. "I gave you one direction on the tagline, snappy" I say shaking my head, "but yes, we will be attempting to steal the same item" I state before reaching down and picking up a briefcase. "this" I say holding out the crown.

"the crown will be locked in the briefcase which in turn will be locked into the interrogation room" I state. "we will need help, so to be fair we're holding a draft, the captain and I given up our overtime so everyone who participates will get the night off" I explain.

"with the first pick of the draft I choose... Terry" The captain says, pointing towards Terry who walks over to him. "All right, brawns over brains" Meghan says as she leans back on her chair. "all right, I take Charles" I state pointing to Charles. "I get it, close friend" Meghan says, getting more antsy. "I pick Gina" Holt says. "Gina?" Meghan says as she stands up, "I take Rosa" I say. "okay, alright well, captain holt that leaves me with you" she says before walking over to him.

"hold on, Cosner" Holt started. "you're peralta's...Paramour, maybe you should be on his team" he states. no no no, Meghan would do anything for your approval even though she's your daughter, including pretending to be in a relationship with me for the past few weeks only to betray me now!" I state dramatically. "Jake, you're majorly overthinking this" Meghan states, shaking her head slightly. "maybe but its a risk I'm not willing to take, you're not on my team Megs" I say, ignoring how hurt she looked. "yeah, Meghan's out" Holt agreed.

"by midnight whoever has the crown will be the king of the nine-nine" I state. "uh, Hitchcock and I still haven't been chosen" Scully states from the back of the room. "i'm good" I say to holt who nods in agreement before walking out with his team.

"hey Jake, can we talk?" Meghan asks as she walks over to me. "yeah" I state. "you really hurt my feelings by leaving me off your team" She states adverting her gaze from me. I felt a tinge of guilt, I was kind of rude to her but I had reasons. "oh, I had no idea you felt that way" I reply. "yeah, it doesn't feel good to be left out" she says pursing her lips. "right, I totally get it, i'm sorry... Captain holt" I Shout yelling at her chest. "what? why are you yelling at my boobs?" She whispers angrily as she turns her body away. "because thats where the camera is, Nice try, ray ray" I say pointing smugly. "theres no camera Jake, I'm being serious" She says annoyed. "okay fine, if youre telling the truth I apologise sincerely" I say leaning back in my chair. "but since your not, I will defeat you" I yell before walking off to the break room, completely forgetting about the witch until it cackles right next to my ear. "ah, scary witch" I yelp as I run away.

"commence operation, oh crap wrong vent" I whisper to myself in the vent. "oh crap, wrong vent. this was a mistake" I say sarcastically as I drop into the observation room. "nice try losers, you blew it" Gina gloated. "yeah, we totally blew it. And all because Boyle marked the wrong vent!" I fake yelled at him. "its not my fault,i thought it was the right vent" he defended himself. "unbelievable mister" I hake my head. "you are mister! he snarks. "I'm having trouble even believing you at all right now, this is the last time I let Charles mark a vent" I state as I glanced behind him at Rosa who is picking the lock. "I'm normally great at marking vents" Charles defends.

"Wow, you should have sen us Rosa, Charles and I were amazing" I gloat. "I somersaulted through a window, cut the crown out of a brief case and replaced everything in under a minute" she says annoyed. "yeah I guess you helped a little" I replied rolling my eyes. "but our fake argument was super convincing and all of the sudden we had to make it longer, and we did!" I say excitedly. "anyways, now all we gotta do is guard this drawer until midnight and the best part about it is Captain holt has absolutely no idea, he is such a fool!" I add.

I hear the elevator doors ding and smile when I see Mr's sarge and her two kids walk in dressed In costume. "hey Jake" Sharon said with a smile, "hey you guys" I reply looking at the twins. "we wanted to surprise Terry, have you seen him?" she asked, glancing around the precinct. "oh he just went downstairs for a bit, but he should be back soon" I explained. "oh Cagney? Lacey? do you guys wanna take a picture with uncle Jake?" Sharon asked her kid who nod. "you don't mind do you?" She asks. Normally I would jump at the chance to hang with terry's kids but I had to watch the briefcase. "um, no of course no that would be so fun". I say smiling. "what if we did it in the briefing room, like were assigning them a case" Sharon asked. "no, I mean you know what would be more fun? if we took a picture right here, and I could have my hand on this cabinet" I said as I placed a hand on the cabinet.

"okay" Sharon said before getting her phone out. "here we go, oh god it was in video mode sorry" she says fumbling with her phone. "take your time, I could do this all day. matter of fact, what if we did one where I had both hands on the cabinet" I say carefully moving my other arm to the cabinet, making sure I didn't hit the girls. "one on top and one on the front" I say as I place both hands on the cabinet. "looks good" Sharon said as she furrowed her eyebrows. "alright smile, three, two, one" She counted down then took the photos. "great you guys, lets go find Daddy" Sharon said taking the twins hands and taking them towards the bathrooms.

"what are you doing?" I ask holt who is awkwardly standing around the table in the break room/ "nothing, just enjoying a taste of my favourite beverage, the soda pop" he explained. "really, i've never seen you enjoy soda pop before" I state suspiciously, "have some now".

He slowly opens the can and brings it to his lips, the look of disgust on his face doesn't go unnoticed. "its delicious" he cringes. "I don't buy it, you made the same fan when you found a chocolate chip in your trail mix" I say. "somethings up, i'm patting you down" I say before patting the captain down."dammit, nothing but a surprisingly tone set of abs" I state, surprised the captain has abs. "why would I have the crown Jake, isn't it still in the interrogation room" holt asks, which makes me realise I was acting suspicious for nothing. "yes, of course its still in there" I say trying my best to cover for myself.

"welp, I guess I'll see you at midnight" I say. "After you" the captain says, gesturing for me to walk first. "no, after you" I say smirking. "I insist" He says, the two of is walk out at the same time to make sure neither is hiding something.

"the handle bar thing was fake, they were trying to distract me" Rosa says angrily. "I think they made a play for the crown" she says. "I know, but I had my hand on the cabinet the whole time, so i'm pretty confident theres no way they could have got it" I say smugly as I open the door. My face drops when I see the cabinet empty. "they got it" I say disappointedly. "look at the back, screws are loose" Rosa says pointing to lose screws on the back. "damn it, that son a bitch is good" I scowl, looking over at the captains desk.

"we have to get that crown back, I already changed my email to "kingjakerulez" with a z" I say panicking as I pace back and forth. "everyones going to think I'm an idiot"

"hello peralta" Holt says as he and his team come up behind me and rosa. "midnight nears" Holt snickers. "yes it does" I reply eyeing him up and down to make sure he hasn't planned anything. "tick tock" he states as he circles around me. "yes, but tick tock for who?" I say circling with him. "you know its for whom" he sneers. "I didn't know that, don't try to provoke me" I reply.

"i'm gonna get that crown back" The captain and I both say at the same time. we look at each other with confusion. "wait, what?" I say. "will you excuse me?" I say before slowly slipping over to the kitchen. "he doesn't have the crown" I say to Rosa, "what? who has it then?" she whispers angrily. " I don't know who has it, what do we do?" I say, "pull the security tapes, I'll think of something" I say, Rosa nods and walks off.

"okay, here I am talking with Terry's kids," I recap as Rosa and I watch the security footage." man I look so strong standing next to them, should I have kids?" I say, thinking about how cute Meghan and i's kids would look. "sure" rosa replies bluntly.

"its holt" Rosa says, "woah, how did he do that?" She says shocked as the captain rolls through the window behind me desk. "guy has an insane set of ab" I explain.

"oh look, he has the crown, and he's headed to the break room" I say, watching intently as holt walks into the break room. "he dumped it in the trash" I say. "did he go back and get it?" rosa asked as she eyes the screen. "nope, janitor took it. but which janitor?" I say trying to look at the name tag, "looks like Im going to have to squint" I say before leaning towards to the screen and squinting. "his name is.. al, al the janitor" I say excitedly.

"all right, its 11:00 P.M that means A'ls long gone, how are we going to get his home address" I ask as I lean back in my chair. "who's the one person you know who's anal enough to send out holiday cards to every single employee?" She says with a smirk as she looks over to Meghan's desk.

"Meghan" I say as I walk over to her. "what do you want Jake?" she asks, seemingly annoyed. "what? why would you assume I want anything?" I ask as I sit on the side of her desk. "what I want is to apologise to my girlfriend, who I hurt" I state. "its whom" she says looking up at me with a smirk.

"why does the word whom even exist if you're not allowed to say it?" I asked annoyed. "anyways, now that Ive apologised and you've accepted, can you give me janitor Al's work address?" I beg. "this is related to your heist isn't it?" Meghan sighs. "no no, this is about a crime" I cover for myself.

" I think janitor al is going to kill the president" I whisper. She rolls her eyes at me as her father comes beside us. "ah Meghan, theres my lovely daughter" he says sweetly. "let me guess, you want the janitors address?" she says suspiciously as he leans back into her chair. "janitor? address? al?" he says trying to cover for himself.

"I never said his name" she states bluntly. "well isn't this rich, after being excluded by both go you, here I am with the power to decide who wins and who looses your little heist" Meghan says manically as she circles around the two of us. "I wouldn't have it any other way" holt says. "you are my wisest assistant" he stated. "pathetic, she cant be manipulated sir" I say rolling my eyes before turning to Meghan.

"Meghan, we are in love. I know we've never said it before but I think this is the perfect time don't you?" I say panicky. "love? ha, whats love compared to the respect of a workplace superior?" Holt snarks. "Meghan Cosner, will you-" I begin to ask as I kneel down on one knee. "enough!" she snaps making me stand up. "pretending to be nice to me is worse than being mean" She states angrily. "you know what? you want the address? you can both have it" she states as she types into her phone. "I hope you're happy you selfish monsters" she says as she walks off.

"I feel terrible" I sigh. "we should apologise" holt agrees. "yes I agree, you definatly should I'll do mine later" I say smartly. "fat chance" he smirks as he stands in front of me. "Charles, I need your but meet me downstairs" I say into my watch. "alpha team, this is the golden sparrow, rendezvous at drop zone yankee" Holt says into his with a smirk before walking of. "how'd you come up with those code names?" I yell confused before running off.

"okay, he lives on the sixteenth floor, I think we beat holt to it" I say to Rosa and Gina as I look up the many flights of stairs. "or did you?" holt snickers as he and his team come up behind me. "I'll get the elevator" Charles says quickly before running over to the elevator, only to see a "not in use" sign. "crap, looks like were taking the stairs" I say before running up the stairs.

After going up sixteen flights of stairs Holt and I exhaustedly arrive at the top. I sluggishly raise my arm and knock on the door. "I win, I knocked first" I slur at the captain with a smirk before turning my attention to the women in the doorway. "you looking for al?" She says annoyed, "yes of course were looking for al you imbecile" holt snaps, "sorry" he responds. "he's having a cigarette on the roof" she says pointing to the roof before shutting the door.

"The roof?" I groan as I let my arms drop to my sides. After going up another five flights we finally got to the roof, we break through the door and breathe the fresh air. "I did it, I am the greatest" I say before throwing up. "al? al? wheres al?" Holt asks exhaustedly as he looks around. I look up and see the janitor standing near the ledge with a cigarette in his hands.

"there he is" I said as I leant on my knees. "I did it, I did it" I say before throwing up again. "Are you al, the janitor?" Holt asks the man. "nope" he says flicking the cigarette on the ground before turning around. "i'm your worse nightmare, Meghan cosner" she smirked as she took the cap and moustache off.

"oh no" I groan. "I don't understand what is happening" the captain says confusedly, "allow me to explain" I say before walking over to Meghan, draping an arm around her shoulder. "Meghan and I were ahead of you the whole time" I say with a smirk. "no, you were part of this, get back over to the losers side loser" Meghan said before pushing my back over to the captain. "Alright, worth a shot" I say.

"so, how'd you pull it off" Rosa asks with a smirk. "well, it all started when I went to tell Jake how much he hurt my feelings and he yelled my breasts" Meghan said as she looked at me. A wave of guilt rushes over me as I realise she was sincerely hurt. "oh boy, I am not going to come off good in this story" I whisper. "nope, remember when you set off the witch?" Meghan asks as she turns to the others.

"you made dad flinch, which was weird since his door was closed" She explained. "but not weird, since he actually heard it over a bug" She smirks as she looks at her father. "it was in an old muffin you never threw in the trash" she says disgustedly as she looks at me. "so thats why people throw away garbage" I snap my fingers. "how are we together?" Meghan sighs, I shrug my shoulders and smile at her.

"Anyway, I tapped into the bugs frequencies so I had ears on Jake" she explained as she gestured to me. "I needed to know what holt was up to, thats where Hitchcock came in" she said pointing to Hitchcock who had suddenly appeared beside her. "I mastermind the whole plan" he smirked trying to take credit.

"you did one small thing and I had to explain it to you like forty-five times" She says sassily. "he left a tiny crack in the blinds so I could read dads lips" she smirked, "bet you didn't know I could read lips" She says to me. "now that I knew your plan it was simple to disrupt, while Scully gracefully moved the witch I got into character" She started, "dad triggered the witch which brought Jake into the room".

"and I threw the crown in the trash can" I say, remembering what happened. "exactly as I plan" She smirked, "then I sent you all here, placed an out of order sign on the elevator, made you all walk up 31 flights of stairs and vomit twice" She stated, gesturing the last part to me.

"actually it was four times, if you count all the stairwell stuff" I corrected. "you thought I was just holts daughter" she says with a chuckle as she walks over to Jake. "And you thought I was just jakes girlfriend" she says to her father. "well I am my own person, capable of making my own decisions and I decided to humiliate you both" She laughed.

"well you did, and it was awesome" I say, walking over to her and draping an arm around her waist. "one last question, wheres the crown" rosa asked. "oh its at Shaws bar, the official sight of my coronation" she smirked as we all started walking to the elevator.

"All hail the crown of destiny" I sang as I placed the crown on Meghans head. I smiled at how beautiful she looked dressed up as a queen. "and all hail she who wears it, Meghan cosner the..." I trail off. "queen" she added with a smile, "queen, of the nine-nine" I cheered with the squad.

"I believe theres something else you both need to say?" she smirked at her father and i. "gladly" I started, "Meghan cosner, is an amazing human/genius" holt and I both said in unison.

"hey, I'm sorry about earlier, I was so focused on winning I didn't realised I hurt your feelings" I said as I sat down in the booth beside her. "hey, it led me to win" she smirked before placing a quick kiss on my lips. We turned to see the squad staring at us cheering, we both blushed as she rested her head on my shoulder.