Just Upset Because He Got Killed
- "Let me get this straight." Winski tried to get his customary collected posture back but was still shaken, even though a friendly maid had carried a plate of cold meats and cheeses and a pitcher of crystal clear water for him, arching her eyebrow only slightly when he declined the mead. "That psychopath nearly severed my head because we entered an area where everybody is assumed to want to fight until they are dead, for no particular reason. And that is his idea of a desirable afterlife."
Jelena shrugged and nodded, a smile of relief and creeping amusement on her lips.
- "I killed the lout myself. I guess my Lord's teachings of compassion and forgiving weren't the first and foremost thing on my mind at the moment..."
- "I should hope so... wait a minute. YOU killed him?" Winski took a long look at Jelena - her round, soft shoulders, gentle smile, her feminine body unburdened by any sort of armor, just a simple robe becoming her curves. Nor did she carry a weapon.
Jelena smiled a little helplessly.
- "I got a bit carried away... I thought your soul is lost in Hades and I would have to do gods know what to find you... oh! You mean THAT. I must show you a thing or two about githzerai martial arts. In fact, we bypass Limbo when we descend Yggdrasil."
- "A monastery in Limbo? Isn't that some sort of ultimate chaos?"
- "Indeed. But the githzerai cities and monasteries are sort of cocoons where order prevails. They learn to control the Limbo somewhat with their willpower... they want to be ever vigilant against laziness of spirit. Grim folks, but you learn."
The massive oaken doors were opened, and several winged horses rode by the blond warrior women and carrying slain warriors entered the hall.
- "That's how we came in too," Jelena said. "There is a regular traffic... the ladies patrol the fields and haul the dead here, and then they are resurrected."
Indeed, a warrior priest sporting a red beard, benevolent smile and a horned helmet was already resurrecting the first warrior who shook himself, smiled a thanks, and headed for the bar for a full tankard, greeting the others chatting and laughing at the bar.
There was a rowdy game of dice, a brawl with gamblers making their bets, and a few bards singing about warriors and their deeds in another corner of the large hall.
- "And this is what they do? Day after day? Fight, die, get resurrected, get drunk, play dice..."
- "That is what I gathered, yes," Jelena said.
- "What about improving oneself? Gaining new knowledge? Intellectual exchange? Experimenting, books..." Winski looked puzzled, and somewhat angry as well.
- "Seems to me they do well without that. And why not? Whom do they bother here, aside from hapless wanderers a weapon merchant neglects to warn of the rules?"
- "But... how empty an existence can that be? They come here and are quite happy with this and themselves for eternity?" Winski's frown deepened.
- "Would you rather them be unhappy? Have you not ever met a mercenary before? You are just upset because you got killed."
- "Pardon me for overreacting," Winski muttered dryly.
- "There's more than that, isn't there." Jelena gave Winski the warm look again, the one he had so hard time resisting.
- "I... not being able to cast spells, study my spell book... it hurts so," Winski quietly admitted. "Spells are a lot of what a magician is. Wielding magic, feeling it in my command... it gives me purpose and a sense that I am good for something. And it makes me... damn it, I know that I deserve my punishment, and that I would have lost my magic anyway. But that these... Vikings just happily go on like magic, or thinking, or knowledge isn't important. Like what I am and what I miss is not important."
- "Don't take it on them, beloved," Jelena answered. "Probably where they live it is not of so much use. And this is about you, not about them. I can only imagine how you feel, but losing something that defines your very identity can not be easy. You have done great so far. And believe me, you will get your powers back once you are ready."
- "I'm... scared. I fear both, if you understand. I fear that I will never learn what I need to learn, but transform into some dark being of Hades, or lose my soul there, dissolving into the place. And I also fear changing into something I am not, should I succeed. I know I should be grateful for the chance I got, and I am. But there you have it. I am scared."
- "Beloved. There is nothing wrong with being honest. It would be strange if you had no conflicting feelings about this. You will not dissolve into Hades. I will be there with you, and you have enough strength in yourself as well. And as for the other thing, I see you perfectly capable of being a good person as you are. Remember what we talked about with Vallara? I will be with you. Whatever happens, I will be with you."
Winski walked to Jelena and embraced her shoulders. He pressed his face into her hair. He felt a bit better.
