I am writing a special LGBT themed chapter. I know the whole story is LGBT but this one tackles the self hatred some LGBT people have. It won't be too sad though. The smut scene isn't the best but the chapter isn't really about the smut this time but enjoy.
Chapter 18: Even tops have body issues
Rating: M
Kinks: body worship, and a surprise kink( i'm not gonna tell as that will ruin story)
Summary: after finding out Maura has body image issues Jane comforts her and makes her feel better.
WARNING: Past mention/reference of self harm.
Maura sighed as she typed her report. It was a boring autopsy, amazingly murder decided to take a day off. With the boring autopsies it gave her more time to think. Sadly walking to the private bathroom that the morgue had; she stood and looked in the full length mirror after locking the door. She frowned as she looked at the dress she wore. It wasn't an ugly dress by any means. In fact everyone complimented it and how femmine (she growled as she heard that word) it made her look.
She put down the backpack and pulled the clothes out. She stripped slowly and folded up the dress placing it in the bag. She then slowly dressed herself with the other clothes she brought. A nice black button down short sleeve shirt, a tight compression shirt, tight boxers, trousers and sneakers (her heels got ruined by stepping in dog feces that morning.)
She looked again this time focusing on her chest. She slowly rubbed her hand down the front of the shirt, sadded by the fact that she could still feel them, the compression binder doing its best to hide them from the world. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the black tie. Placing it around her neck she pulled slowly on it; carefully watching it form and complete her look. With it in place she smiled a little.
She stood there for several minutes, the quiet vents of the morgue the only sound.
They're not ready for you yet. She thought as a booming voice was heard in the background.
"Maura? We got a case. Let's go." A voice said as a hand banged on the door causing the doctor to jump.
"O..One minute Jane. Go ahead I'll meet you there." came her response. She then heard footsteps leave the morgue. Quickly stripping and putting the dress back on she sighed deeply as she left the morgue.
Later that night:
Maura flipped through the channels as she waited for her food to come. She leaned back onto the couch as Jo Friday jumped in her lap. Groaning as there was nothing good on she sipped her wine. Jane had been stuck at work and Maura knew she'd be alone tonight.
Ding. Ding.
Standing she opened the door and paid the driver. Gently kicking the door shut she slowly ate her food.
Crating jo for the night she walked upstairs and grabbed her toy box. She recently ordered a new toy and hid it from Jane out of shame. Putting the toy on she looked at it. It was fleshed colored and medium size. She wrapped her hand around it and slowly moved it up and down. Closing her eyes she thought of her fantasy and moaned.
"Jane… yes."
…
Meanwhile:
Jane groaned and rubbed her eyes. Opening the door she threw her stuff on the ground and headed upstairs. Hearing a moan she quietly walked to their room. Peeking her head in she stopped at the sight. Mauras hand wrapped around...a new cock? When had she got that? The cock wasnt too big and the head looked real.
"Yes...Jane...suck daddys cock." Maura whimpered, her eyes closed..
Jane walked back downstairs and watched TV whimpering at the image. She wasn't allowed to bug maura in times like this. She licked her lips and tried to ignore the pounding between her legs. Laying on the couch, sleep took the tired detective.
The pair held hands as they entered the restaurant. Jane clung to Maura as she felt out of place.
"Isles." Maura told the host and they were led to the table. Maura pulled the chair out for Jane and then sat across from her. While they waited Maura played with her hands and adjusted the tie she wore. Jane looked Maura up and down taking in the doctor's form. The doctor had recently gotten a half guard (very short) haircut and was wearing a suit. Their waiter came over.
"Welcome. What would you like to drink today?"
"I'd like a water." Jane said.
"You sir?" he asked Maura.
"It's Ma'am." Jane growled and the waiter looked uncomfortable.
"Jane!" Maura yelled as Jane looked down.
"Ginger ale please."
"Ok...Ma'am?" He said unsure of what to call the doctor.
Maura shrugged as he left.
Maura glared at Jane and Jane looked down submissively.
"I didn't need your help."
"But..I..I'm sorry."
Maura huffed and looked away mumbling. Jane looked at the floor as soft tears fell. Maura noticed and held Janes hand.
"I'm sorry sweetie. Don't cry."
Jane did her best to control it. Maura sighed.
The pair ate in awkward silence as they were both lost in their thoughts.
Maura entered the house first as she led Jane upstairs. As they stumbled back onto their bed, Jane laughed and kissed Maura. Leaving marks on Maura's neck Jane reached for Maura's shirt. Maura suddenly stopped her.
"What's wrong Master?"
"I..I..I just..i'm not in the mood." Maura half lied.
"Oh..ok..sorry." Jane said as she started to get off Maura. Maura pulled her back down. Jane laid on her chest.
"Mmm. I'm jealous of your tits master, so soft and big." Jane smiled.
"Y..yeah" Maura said quietly.
Jane noticed Maura cupping her own sex.
"Jane?"
"Yes?
"Be honest with me...do you ever miss men?"
Jane pulled back and looked at the doctor.
"Maura…"
"Be honest Jane."
"No. I don't miss them. Why?"
"Do you miss the penetration?" Maura asked curiously.
"I...Isn't that what dildos are for?"
"Yes but...nevermind". Maura growled and ordered Jane off her. Jane went to her mattress on the floor and cried herself to sleep. She thought she heard Maura crying too.
Jane was so confused on how Maura was acting lately. Maura isolated herself from Jane both physically and emotionally. She wouldn't let Jane touch her. Never let Jane see her naked and would stay at the morgue until late in the night. Having enough Jane stormed down to the morgue ready to confront her master. Clearly something was bothering her and Jane only wanted to help. She was about to open the door when she heard Maura talking to herself.
"She'll never accept me. She'll think I'm some kind of freak. She'll leave me. But... I hate living this lie. She wouldn't understand being raised in that christan bullshit. I'll never be a real one. No matter how much i try… Why was i born a girl? Why?"
Jane was confused about what Maura was saying but realized now was not the time to confront her. She walked upstairs and slumped in her chair. Her brain desperately trying to connect the dots. Her thoughts trying to fix this puzzle
She clearly isn't happy. Did I do something wrong? No. this is clearly something about her. She'll never be a real what...she got mad when i corrected the waiter... she wears guys clothes...that is new. She wont let me touch her like before….maybe she has a body issue… but i've seen her naked before...so what is she hiding… she called herself daddy… that was really hot...she hates that she was born a girl….could it be? Maybe?
Jane smirked as she realized what the problem was. She knew she had to make Maura feel better. But how?
It was Saturday when her plan was set into motion. Maura had been called in and Jane decided to set the house up. She smiled placing the petals up the stairs. Hummed to herself while picking out the perfect dress. A simple black one with wine colored lipstick that she set aside for later. now what to cook for dinner. She looked up some fancy recipes and decided on one that didn't look too hard. She took some money and headed off to the butcher. She needed good meat for this.
Heating up the cast iron pan she tried to do this without burning the house. She carefully followed the recipe and ensured that she got the best cheapest red wine she could. She then baked 2 potatoes and changed into her dress. Placing the plate on the table and filling the glass with cold chocolate milk Jane kneeled and waited.
"That fucking Pike. I hate cleaning up his bloody mess. Every time. I'm not his maid. Damnit!" Maura growled entering the door. She threw her stuff down and stomped over to the couch. In her anger she felt something hard under her foot and heard a whimper of pain. Thinking she stepped on jo. She glanced down to see Jane cupping her injured hand.
"Oh Jane baby. I'm so sorry." Maura said and knelt down taking the hand to examine it. It appeared no bones were broken, just hurt. She kissed up Janes hand then her arm and finally her lips. Jane responded and wrapped her good hand in Maura's hair, moaning softly. Maura then helped them stand. It was then she noticed the food. She walked over and sat down.
"Is this Entrecote?" She asked, looking at the sliced steak dish.
"Yes. I found it online."
"Jane sweetie...I.."
"Yes?"
Maura ate a piece. It was wonderful to have french food. This dish brought back memories of childhood.
"So good." Maura practically moaned. She ate quickly as she looked at the plate. There were two slices left. She looked down at Jane and pet her hair. She noticed Jane kept eyeing the dish. Janes stomach growled and Jane weakly rubbed it trying to soothe her hunger. Maura smiled and gave Jane the last bit; an act Jane greatly appreciated.
After dinner Jane walked Maura to the couch. Maura grew confused as Jane held her leg up but soon realized why. Jane slowly licked the bottom of the doctors foot from heel to toes. She then proceeded to individually lick and suck each of Mauras toes. Maura simply moaned and ran her hand through her pet's hair.
"Mmm...good girl suck my toes." Maura growled playfully. Jane then soon repeated the process on Maura's other foot. Maura painted feeling the fire start in her stomach. She soon helped Jane stand and whispered bedroom.
As they walked upstairs Maura noticed the petals thrown across them. She smiled at Janes attempt to be romantic.
Jane laid in the bed naked as Maura kissed her. She tried to pull off Maura's clothes when Maura stopped her.
"No..w..we'll just focus on you tonight." maura said.
Jane whimpered but decided to try something else. She pulled Maura close. Maura sucked Jane's neck leaving a mark. Jane moaned softly and pulled away. Maura looked away and cried softly.
"Maura? What is it?"
"I..i cant...i just…"
Jane held Maura's hand before kissing her wrist. It was then she noticed a series of parallel lines across her wrist and forearm. She frowned knowing what these were. Maura tried to pull away but Jane didn't let her budge.
"Maura…" Jane began.
"I..it..they're from a long time ago…" Maura confessed. "I just...I.."
Maura sobbed as Jane held her. Jane was unsure of what to do or say but she simply said i love you. She smiled and pulled away pushing the M.E. onto her back. Kissing the M.E's neck before licking her ear.
"Jane...I...this is…" She began. She was shocked by what Jane whispered next.
"I'm ready for you now."
Maura was confused for a moment. Clearly Jane was aroused but still..it didn't seem to be about that...what Jane said next cleared the confusion.
"My big strong handsome man." Jane purred to the doctor and it's only then the doctor realized.
"Y..you know?" Maura said surprised as she tried to pull away. Hiding in shame.
"Yes. I figured it out. I am a detective after all."
"B..but how..I.."
"The other night I heard you talking to yourself in your office. "I'll never be a real one." I was confused until you asked why you were born a girl...Then I understood."
"Jane..I'm sorry I hid it from you. I just..i was scared you'd leave me."
"Maura i love you for you. Not what's between your legs. Speaking of which…"
Jane got up and headed to the "toy" chest. What she pulled out made Maura's eye wide and her face red as blood.
"When did you get this?" Jane said holding the realistic 7 inch cock and harness in her hand.
"I..a little while ago."
"Well I'm sure this will be more fun than the last time you used it." Jane giggled before throwing the object at Maura who caught it in her hand.
"You..you saw?"
Jane came closer with every word crawling on the bed like a panther.
"Yes and it was so hot. If I wasn't so tired I would have fucked myself like a naughty girl. Then you'd have to punish me...daddy…"
Maura's Jaw dropped as Jane inched closer and at the fact that she called her daddy. It sent thor's lightning down the refined doctors spine.
"What do you say I give it a ride?" Jane said.
"i..I..id like that." Maura said.
"I love you Maura." Jane said as she helped Maura get into the toy.
Maura stood naked as the toy settled beneath her hips. Looking at the door mirror she moaned as she stroked the cock a few times. She could see Jane on the bed licking her lips.
After taking a few deep breaths Maura turned to face Jane.
"Jane..I..I know I'm usually unshakable but i...i'll need a lot of support right now...ok..a lot of talk and reassurance. I know I'm supposed to be the tough one but I…"
Jane smiled and pulled the doctor closer, she kissed Maura before pushing the woman onto her back.
"I understand." Jane said. "Now lets have some fun." The grin Jane gave put the cheshire cat to shame. She kissed her way down Maura's stomach before reaching the cock. It was surprisingly realistic and had a vein. She slowly took it into her throat gagging slightly before relaxing. She couldn't get the entire thing but Maura smiled and threaded her hands through the detectives hair.
"Mmm. Jane… suck daddy's cock. Good whore…"
Jane nodded her head up and down before cupping the balls of the cock which were actually heavy for a toy. She moaned as she licked the toy making Maura gasp and thrust the toy into her mouth.
Jane eventually pulled away leaving a thick trail of spit from her mouth to the head of the toy. She wiped her mouth and smirked at her handy work. The shiny toy made her cunt clench in anticipation.
"Maura. You ok?" Jane noticed the doctor had her eyes closed. When she opened them the look made Jane giggle.
"What's so funny?" Maura asked defensively.
"You just look like you feel good." Jane replied.
"I feel amazing." Maura said.
"How can I make you feel more amazing, my big tough man?"
Maura thought for a minute. Before pulling Jane's collar. Jane moaned at the dominant display. Maura leaned in the detective's ear before whispering.
"Ride me Jane. Work for it. Make me cum and I'll do something nice for you." Maura then laid down on her back. Jane climbed atop her and slowly rubbed her pussy against the cock. She gasped at the feeling.
"Mmm. Jane get it nice and wet for that tight little cunt…" Maura said.
Jane whimpered at the words and rewarded Maura with another flood of her wetness.
"Mmm. so needy for me."
"Yes..daddy…"
"Prove it. Ride me Jane."
Jane stopped and lined up Maura's cock to her entrance. Gripping the other woman's shoulders she slowly sunk down only to feel Maura's fist stopping her after about 3 inches down. Jane growled frustrated.
"Beg Jane. I said you gotta work for it."
"Please..Please..i need more. You know this isnt enough."
Maura released her fist and dragged the detective down onto the rest of her cock. Jane hissed at the pain but adjusted. She soon found a rhythm.
Sliding her wet pussy up and down Maura's cock the detective moaned. She looked down at Maura who seemed to be enjoying this but seemed to want comfort.
"Oh Maura...fuck..you feel so good."
"Really?" Maura said unsure as she began to thrust up into Jane.
"O..yes. So good, god i want your cock so bad...please...mmm. You..so good...harder."
Jane thrust down harder and leaned forward to change up the angle. This caused the toy to hit her G-spot. The detective gasped at the change.
"Yes...so good. God Maura, my pussy is milking you...can you feel it."
"Maura shuddered. While she couldn't obviously feel anything from the toy itself, Jane's description made it feel real.
"Keep going." Maura begged.
"Feel so good. The vein stroking me there. On that soft spot. The head touching my womb. The way your balls slap me every time I bottom out. So wonderful."
Maura growled imagining every single thing Jane said. She began to thrust harder.
"Yeah. my muscles...fuck...they keep getting tighter for you baby. They want you….need you...only your cock will do."
"Fuck."
"Do you hear the wetness Maura? How much I like this. God...so close."
"Yes I can Jane. So wet for me like a good pet."
Jane moaned and thrust harder Maura also moaned but seemed unsure of something.
"Jane?" Maura asked softly.
Jane slowed her thrust down. "Yeah?"
"Can I um...This toy it…"
Jane stopped. She looked at Maura concerned.
"What is it Maura?" Jane asked.
"I um..It has another feature...can i use it."
"Will it hurt me?" Jane asked nervously.
"No..not at all. I just really want to use it."
"Then ok. Do whatever you need to my handsome man."
Jane slowly began thrusting again as Maura relaxed. She pulled Jane close as Jane worked herself back into a rhythm.
"Jane..Say im a real man...Please…"
"Maura. You are as real a man as anyone. Please cum with me….no...cum in me" Jane growled.
Maura smiled as little did Jane know that that was the extra feature. Jane moaned as she kissed Maura.
"Jane baby. Rub your clit. Cum on my cock baby."
"Yes sir...thank you daddy Maura. Mmm.."
Jane moaned rubbing herself into bliss. The doctor felt Jane tighten and shake. She reached down to the toy and pressed a switch, releasing fake semen into the detective. Jane looked on surprised at the stream but moaned even louder at the thought of Maura cumming inside her.
"Yes fuck...fill your little slut with cum….mmm. Yes Maura."
Those words caused Maura to fall apart in Jane's arms, she shook and cried as bliss took her.
"I.. im a real man." She said.
"Yes..you're MY man." Jane said.
When all had settled down Maura was still crying. Jane kissed away the tears and held the doctor.
"Hi baby." She said after a few minutes as Maura's tears quieted to sniffles.
"Jane..I'm sorry I hid this. I'm sorry for how I acted..I just…"
"You were scared. I understand."
"I shouldn't have been scared..i just."
"Shh…" Jane kissed the tired doctor as she began to go to the mattress on the floor. Maura pulled the brunette back.
"No." Maura said. "Stay here." Maura then left to brush her teeth and take the toy off. She then tucked Jane in on her bed and laid on the mattress on the floor.
"But.." Jane began.
"Stay there Jane. A little humility never hurt anyone."
"I.." Jane began noticing Maura's mattress was much more comfortable than hers. Sleep weighed on the pair.
"Goodnight beautiful girl." Maura said.
"Goodnight handsome man." Jane said. The pair slept soundly for the night.
A/N: good bad or indifferent? Reviews make my night.
