Zuko
Farewell
"Writing a love letter?"
Azula leaned casually against the doorframe. Zuko's heart beat in his whole body.
"Mai is with her uncle at the Boiling Rock," Zuko said, getting up slowly and joining his sister. She was dressed in the armor and colors of the Fire Nation army, but she didn't appear like someone heading out to war. She was completely relaxed, a teenage girl here to gossip.
"I'm not talking about Mai," Azula said slowly. She giggled. Zuko's stomach clenched.
Zuko knew Azula knew about Katara. She had said so herself that the Dai Li had been watching them, hidden in the shadows, listening to every word. Zuko had seen for himself how skilled the agents were at hanging in the darkness of the tall caverns. But she had never said a word, never dropped a hint, never teased him. Until now, the day that Katara and the rest of the Avatar's forces were launching an invasion on their palace. An invasion he was planning on joining.
What did Azula want?
"Let me refresh your memory," Azula said, really enjoying herself. "You were trapped underground, you didn't know when - or if - I would ever let you out. You were so scared and alone! But you weren't alone, there was someone there to comfort you in your darkest hour."
He swung his body around in a giant, theatrical kick, aiming his heel for her chest. She saw it coming from a mile away and nimbly jumped back into the hallway. He followed, throwing forceful punches of flame that she twisted and avoided, never breaking a sweat, never losing her smile. At the end of the hallway, she leaned against a window.
"Did I strike a nerve?"
"Are you going to tell Mai?" he demanded.
"I really should," said Azula. "Mai is a dear friend. I shouldn't let her be lied to."
Zuko put up his fists as a threat. "If the Dai Li were watching then they know nothing happened."
Azula smiled - but something had changed. Her smile was off. Her eyes were dark. "I wouldn't worry about Mai, though she will probably put a few throwing stars in your eye if she ever finds out. That's nothing - compared to what Father will do."
Zuko had seen his father exactly once since returning to the Fire Nation. They had been at a war meeting together. His father had spoken to him, looked at him, even congratulated him. And unlike some of the others, Zuko could tell his father was being genuine when he praised Zuko for killing the Avatar.
Zuko's stomach twisted. Was the Avatar still alive? Was he coming to the palace today? Something in him made him think that the Avatar was still out there. So today his father would think he was a liar, on top of a traitor and a coward. He could blame Azula, but that had never gone well before.
Zuko threw fire and got up close to her. His hand was inches from her face. "You can't tell him."
Azula shrugged. "I don't know what to do. I'm conflicted. Should I protect my brother? Even if it means putting my father in danger? Or should I tell him, warn him - even though it means I'll never see you again."
"Warn him? About a fifteen year old girl? I don't think Father will be scared of her." Though he should be.
Azula smiled. She had caught her prize. "And he shouldn't be. But you forget Zuko, your place in all of this. That pretty little girl only thinks she's coming for father. But when she breaches the Fire Lord's chamber, it's going to be you, instead."
Zuko could have laughed, but it wasn't the time. There was something off about Azula. He couldn't put his finger on it. But laughing at her would only add air to her flames - or gunpowder to her volcano.
"You're the Fire Lord's decoy, Zuko. You're there to trap the Avatar's little friends. Will you be able to do it?"
"There's nothing to do," Zuko pointed out. "I won't have my firebending, no one will."
Azula rolled her eyes.
"Don't be so coy. We all know about your swords."
Zuko swallowed his nerves. Yes, the swords were his advantage during the eight minutes that he and all other firebenders were rendered useless. He was counting on that.
"So what?"
"I assume you'll be armed, ready to do anything to keep the children busy until the eclipse ends."
"Sure."
"You know what really takes up time? What really distracts from your goals?"
"Being dead?" Zuko guessed.
"You are my brother."
"I will do whatever it takes." Zuko wished his voice wasn't shaking.
"Hmm. I don't think you will. That's why I have to tell Father."
She began to walk down the hall. "Wait! What do you want, Azula?" Zuko wanted to be done with her games.
She turned to glare at him. "That's why you've always been a failure. You always think in terms of what you want, what I want, what everyone wants! But you're the Fire Lord's son! You're the stand-in for Father today. It isn't about what you want. It's about what's good for our people. Those are the decisions that you should be making."
Zuko doubted very much that Azula made every - or any - decision based on the needs of her people. In her words, he saw what she wanted, what she had always wanted. She wanted the throne, she wanted to be the crown prince. And why shouldn't she have it? She was a prodigious firebender, the likes of which hadn't been seen in centuries. Plus, she had their father's disposition. She was Ozai's heir.
The line of succession had been blurred by Zuko's banishment; no one had bothered to straighten it out since his return. Ozai probably wanted this, his children fighting to be first in line. Whoever was stronger, faster, and more vicious would get the throne. Zuko knew he should just let her have it. It meant nothing to him.
But. She was his sister. He should at least try.
"It's just a decoy, Azula," he said softly. "Just a military maneuver. It doesn't mean anything."
"Of course it does," she snapped. "The best firebender should be protecting Father. And that's me. I killed the Avatar - you let him escape. That's what I should really tell Father. You're nothing but a traitor and you always have been. That's why you let some pathetic, waterbending slut get to you. You're weak."
Azula didn't think of Zuko as her family. She didn't see anyone that way. She viewed them all as allies and advantages. Or as enemies and weaknesses. There was no in between for Azula. Zuko believed that when it had suited her, she had truly wanted her brother back. Now that he was in her way, she wanted her brother gone. It was that simple.
Zuko saw her so clearly now. All this time he thought she was a supernatural judge of character, and a master of manipulation. But standing in front of him now was a bare nerve. Azula was a dangerous cocktail of ambition and cruelty, to be sure. But now that he saw her for what she was, she was entirely predictable. She thought he was an emotional loser? Might as well give her what she came for.
"What do you want, Azula? Just come out with it. Do you want to be the decoy? Fine. I hope you're ready to go to a fight completely unarmed, defenseless. I'll tell you this - that girl is going to be throwing around a lot more than her looks. Are you really so arrogant to think that you can stand against a waterbending master without your bending!?"
Azula smirked. She smelled victory.
"I should tell Mai that she has to up her game. One kiss from a splasher and you're all turned around. Don't worry, your secret is safe with me. You can play around with whoever you want. I don't care. Just remember who your family is. I'll tell Father that you would rather not be the decoy, sound good?"
Zuko glared at her until she was gone. Then he returned to his room and slowly shut the door. He finished his letter with trembling hands. The whole time Azula had been taunting him, implying that he was a traitor, the evidence was out on his desk for anyone to see. It wasn't a love letter, not to Mai at least. It was an explanation, an excuse, a declaration of intent. It was a farewell.
Zuko had much to leave in the Fire Nation. But Mai was the only one who might be interested in reading what he had to say.
