Chapter 21

The hall going out was the same as the one coming in. Pride reached his room, but passed it, until it opened up into the counsel room. He stumbled to a stop, blinking a few times in the dimmer light and bigger space.

"Selim. How was your sleep? Are you alright now?"

Pride nodded. It was true, sort of. "Did you know there's a guy named Porter in your TARDIS? He used his cybernetics to blow up the kitchen."

"Oh. Yes, I knew Porter was there. I invited him. I didn't invite him to blow up the TARDIS though. If he wants to escape, he'd have better luck by playing nice with her."

"I . . . what?"

"I'm sure you've noticed I find a good deal of trouble." Understatement of the year. Pride nodded. "Porter was one of the people causing it on one planet. I stopped him, but I also offered to let him come with me. I do that sometimes. I wasn't expecting him to except though. Made things awkward."

Well, at least she wasn't totally remorseless to her enemies. Might be useful for him. He sat down. The Doctor apparently misinterpreted that as him being overwhelmed.

"Sorry Selim."

"What?"

"I've been dragging you from one dangerous futuristic place to another. It seemed like a good idea, but I just put more information and pressure on you than I should. I'm sorry."

Pride shook his head, but actually put some thought into his answer. "No. I like learning new things, and seeing all these places. But it might've been a bit much."

"Do you want to go home?"

"No," Pride said. But stopping there would be suspicious, and if he acted like everything was fine the Doctor might keep going on at this pace. "I told you I like travelling. But, maybe we could just go someplace easier this time?"

The Doctor smiled. "I'll see what I can do."

She set the TARDIS off to a new location and flung the doors open. Sand came rolling in. They were in a desert. She stood there in silence for a moment.

"We're going to need some goggles. Oh, and we should contact your mom sometime."

As it turned out, there was in fact a phone in the TARDIS he could call from. He wasn't sure how a box that could go anywhere in time and space and was currently sitting in a desert could get the right person when he put in the home number, with very clear reception at that, but it had. Pride let Mrs. Bradley know he was alright, and told her he'd stopped to get lunch with the Doctor. Apparently, very little time had passed for her. Technically, he and the Doctor had in fact had lunch in there somewhere, it had just been a much longer trip than Mrs. Bradley would assume.


The Doctor and Pride wandered the desert with the gear they found in the TARDIS. It wasn't a normal desert. The sand came in all different colors, the sort of torquise probably being the best. And they didn't even run into anything that wanted to kill them.


The Doctor led them to one of the universe's largest shopping centers. Rummaging around in the TARDIS had confirmed they, unsurprisingly, did not have much in Selim's size.

Going to someplace this big meant there would actually be fun stores to go to. It also meant the TARDIS had dropped them off on the wrong end of the center. The two wandered around a little. They got something to eat. The Doctor stopped at the lego store and ending up putting on a juggling show. Selim 'helped' by handing her increasingly ridiculous things to juggle. She wasn't sure where he'd got a live, rolled up armadillo. Selim had stared at the alchemy shop for a while, surprised to see so much knowledge on public display. The Doctor explained some things were still off limits, like flame alchemy, but this shop did cover a lot of the basics.

Then the Doctor led them to the teleporters, and sent them clear to the other side of the center. She stepped out with a satisfied smile and turned around. Selim had used the teleporter next to hers, but he stumbled out, looking paler than usual.

"Did something go wrong?" the Doctor asked.

"I think I'm going to be sick."

And then he was.


Pride sat in the TARDIS reading. It was good to escape the wider universe sometimes, though the wider TARDIS could arguably be no better.

The Doctor's library was huge. After spending some time trying to figure out how to sort through it, he decided to start with the section on alchemy. It had far more than you'd find in Amestris, even in Central, and some of that could be helpful for things like unfamiliar floors.

He pet a cat as he read. He'd been a little surprised to see an animal just wandering about the TARDIS, but at this point it was going to take a lot more to phase him. It was admittedly nice to be able just go up and touch animals, without them reacting to the many souls of a Philosopher's Stone.

The cat suddenly stretched, front legs going out like normal. But two black wings also flapped up off its back, and when it opened its eyes they were purple. It blinked its big eyes up at Pride a few times.

Pride stared back for a moment and then actually laughed. He should've known it wasn't a regular cat.


The Doctor took them to a volcano.

"It hasn't erupted in years. It should be fine. Probably."

Again, not phased. Pride peered over the side.