Chapter Seventeen
The sound of snores filled the house. Dew still clung to plants as the crack of sunshine peeked over the horizon. Watercolours of pink and purple swirled in the sky. Before anyone else in the house woke up, she silently made her way downstairs. She knew what she would find.
Slowly picking up the scattered cans and bottles of alcohol, she put them away. Grabbing a towel, she wiped the trail of liquid that scattered from the entry to the living room. She brought the necessary cleaning supplies she needed and cleaned the puke that missed the toilet. The stench of old food and alcohol finally gone, the washroom returned to it's regular sparkle.
Wiping the sweat from her forehead, she grabbed a clean blanket from the closet and walked towards the living room. Spreading the thick fabric into the air, it slowly descended down upon a fallen figure on the couch. Kagome watched her sleeping husband with worry. It had been almost a month since the capture of the Hunters when his drinking habits increased. Always in a state of drunkenness, she wondered what happened. She tried to talk to him about it several times, but he would ignore the conversation as a whole. He refused to let her into his heart.
Was he lost now that his revenge for his murdered sister was completed? Now that the Hunters were all dead, did he lose his purpose in life?
She had no idea and he wouldn't bother telling her. At the same time, she didn't tell him about the mark Sesshomaru gave her. A scoff exited her lips. How funny... they were a married couple that didn't bother communicating the important things to one another.
Leaving her husband to sleep on the couch, she went to change into her work outfit. No matter the weather, she wore a long sleeved blouse and a dress pants. Tying her hair into a low pony tail, she cautiously descended down the stairs. Shippo stood in his elementary school uniform, waiting for her with a smile. Holding a finger to his lips, he hushed quietly, "Good morning, Kagome."
Considerate of the sleeping man in the living room, Shippo learned to be as quiet in the morning. Kagome smiled and whispered, "Good morning, Shippo."
She grabbed their bento boxes she had made the other night and held his hand. A routine of theirs, they walked down the streets side by side sharing dreams they dreamt of that night. Shippo told the story of the giant fire cat he befriended in his dreams. Sango was a demon hunter and her husband Miroku was a perverted monk. Kagome giggled at the tale Shippo spun.
Finally dropping Shippo off at his school, she remained at the school gates to watch him leave for class until he disappeared from sight. She had Shippo transferred to the school across from her workplace to make it easier for both of them.
Ding.
The elevator doors slid open to the view of cubicles and busy people walking by. The sound of phones ringing echoed from every direction. Stepping into her closed office, the noise stopped.
Silence.
She hadn't spoken to Sesshomaru or her father, not after the conversation. What was she hesitant with? It was as if her father was giving her an ultimatum of choosing her husband and friends or family. Knowing that wasn't his intentions, she just didn't know. She knew she had to talk to Arata about this sooner or later. She didn't think he wouldn't notice if she stopped ageing after a few years.
The back of her mind whispered questions about what the mark actually meant. Her curiosity absorbed such questions and wondered if perhaps... Shaking her head, she pushed away all thoughts.
"KAGOME!" Sango burst into her office. Kagome prepared herself for an urgent and risky case that needed the Child Protection Service's immediate action. "Miroku is driving me crazy! Let's go for a drink tonight."
Kagome slumped back into her chair. Knowing that it wasn't work related, she said, "You can tell me all about it tonight. I promise, Sango."
A smile replaced her friend's frustrated expression.
She remembered Mirkou and Sango were married soon after she did. Perhaps the same length in their married life, it seemed so different compared to her's. She had yet to fight with Arata, not even an argument. She never experienced the rush of emotions that Sango would tell her about when Miroku did something stupid or on the other hand something amazing.
Their marriage was indeed something different.
##
A glass of beer slammed against the wooden table of the restaurant. Sango said with frustration, "Miroku's choice to become a literature professor was a huge mistake! He is always surrounded by freshman girls! I even caught him flirting with one of the college students yesterday, Kagome!"
Sipping on her beer, she listened to her friend rant. Allowing the frustrations to slowly settle, she said, "Sango, you know better than anyone that Miroku loves you to death."
Sango's feature's softened, knowing what she said was true. Kagome added to pour water over the flames, "He would never betray your trust. As a friend, Miroku has been loyal to me since day one. I can tell he flirts here and there with others to make you pay attention to him, but I know he is a loyal one."
Sango drowned the last drop of her beer before wiping her mouth. She admitted, "I know... I just don't know what else I can do to show him how much I love him. I'm not used to expressing things... you know me Kagome."
She closed her eyes in understanding. Sango had lost her younger brother very early on, which led to a ripple effects of issues for her. Her friend had once lost the ability to love anyone else in fear that she would lose them one day. Although Sango has healed over the past few years, it seems it was still difficult for her to express herself to her loved ones. Blue eyes fluttered open again and searched for the waiter to order another round of drinks. Raising her arm, it soon faltered at the sight near the other end of the restaurant.
"What's wrong Kagom-" Sango witnessed the scene her eyes remained locked with. Her drunk husband entered into the restaurant with his arms wrapped around another lady's waist. He whispered into her ear causing their laughter to drift into the restaurant.
"That fucking bastard," Sango snarled as she stood up from her seat. Kagome grabbed for Sango's wrist and pulled her back down. She watched her friend look at her with surprise. She explained calmly, "I'll speak with him, Sango. No need for you to get involved."
Sango sat speechless at the collected response of a wife who had just witness her unfaithful husband. Kagome was the opposite of her. The emotions of her heart was easily read on her face. Yet now, Sango sat watching her friend appear unfazed. She knew Kagome's relationship with Arata had never been emotionally driven, but to this point?
##
At the crack of dawn, while everyone should be still asleep, her footsteps quietly descended down the steps. In repetition of the day before, she prepared to clean up the mess her husband left behind. Her gaze landed at the lone figure awake and sitting at the kitchen table. She paused for a moment, confused as to why her husband was awake. Scanning the living room and entrance door, she found no evidence of alcohol. She slowly approached him and quietly sat facing him.
Perhaps it was time to face the truth about their relationship.
His facial expression remained deep in thought as if he was in an inner battle. Finally one side of the battle had won as he slid an file of paper across the kitchen table towards her.
Opening up the file, she immediately knew where this conversation was headed.
"I want a divorce," she heard him say. Unable to form the following words, she remained silent. Reading over the contents of the paper before her, she wondered how things came to this.
"As cool and collective as usual," a hint of resentment sounded in his voice. Watching his wife and her blank face, he muttered, "Won't you even ask why I want a divorce? You're not even going to fight against it?"
Fight against it? Did he want her to cling to him and beg him not to go through with the divorce? Her eyes lowered in shame at the reality of her feelings. She didn't care. Still, seeing that he wanted her to ask, she repeated his question, "Why do you want a divorce?"
"I don't even look like a man to you in comparison to Sesshomaru, do I?" He watched her eyes spark at the name of her brother. Anger streamed through his body, releasing the pent up disdain he felt throughout the years. "He places up bodyguards around the house to protect you 24/7 and puts his youkai ki to notify him of any intruders. Without even my permission he does that. Why? Probably because he doesn't think I'm able to protect you, your own husband! You know what that does to a man?"
She sat quietly as she heard for the first time her husband vent about the things that had bothered him for so long.
"My goal in becoming a detective was to get revenge for my sister, but Sesshomaru didn't even give me a chance, did he? He completely ignored all the hard work I've done and proved to me how incompetent the police force and my worth was." The feeling of defeat never to be forgotten by memory. It didn't matter who you were, when compared to Sesshomaru, you feel like you are nothing. He was able to stay sane for so long because he tried to believe that Sesshomaru and Kagome were just brother and sister. Yet, he always had an inkling of doubt. When it came to light that they were not blood related, it made him go insane. The thought of ever competing against Sesshomaru burned his ego vastly. So... he gave up before he could even be challenged.
"Is that why you cheated on me?" Her voice asked with an emptiness.
His eyes widened as he finally met her gaze. After a moment of shock, a dry laugh erupted from his mouth. So his wife knew he was cheating and didn't even give him a single reaction. He confessed only to her, "I needed at least one person to make me feel like I'm worth something."
She looked away from his stare and felt guilt seep into her heart. So it had been her fault.
"She makes me happy." He talked about his mistress. The frown on his face softened into a look of deep longing. "She showed me that what we had wasn't love."
If her relationship with Arata wasn't love, then what was love between a husband and wife? Her eyes grew lost at the question before her.
"It was more passionate. She makes my heart beat uncontrollably. I could tell her everything. I wanted to tell her everything."
'Sesshomaru,' the whisper of her heart echoed in her ears. A torn look crossed her appearance, in shock of thinking about her brother while her husband talked about love. Abruptly standing up, she took the divorce papers and said curtly, "I'll sign it."
She walked away from the only man that loved her for her scars. The only man that stuck to her after seeing the negative effects of what her trauma caused within her. He was by her side to help soothe her during a nightmare and played a part in healing her. Closing her eyes, she hid her tears from him. Perhaps their love wasn't one between a husband and wife, but she still cared for him.
