Chapter 20: Omega
Connie sat on a small stool just outside a tent as she gave the final lesson of the day to several people.
Alpha had Connie giving lessons around the clock each day to her followers. She had Connie make flashcards for particular words she wanted her followers to learn. As each card was shown, Connie signed the corresponding word to them for them to learn. Nearly half the camp had learned dozens of words already: me, you, them, us, quiet, sleep, eat, water, deer, tree, walk, run, attack, fall back, up, down, left, right, just to name a few.
It was her fourth day at the Whisperer camp and she was beginning to become accustomed to the routine. It felt so bizarre to Connie that her life here was becoming normal to her.
She got up early every morning like everyone else. They all shared a meal together around the campfires and tents. It was usually just meat - a fresh kill hunted the day before. After that it was time for everyone's daily chores. The men worked around camp or went off to hunt while the women stayed back to cook, clean and care for the children. It amazed Connie how content everyone appeared to be with the regression.
Another group was always assigned to watch over the herd. They took shifts in groups of ten making sure the mass of walkers was under control and away from the camp.
As Connie finished her last lesson of the day, she stared across the camp at Alpha.
Connie hated that she lived in a world where Alpha was alive, and her baby sister wasn't. She hated Alpha. It took everything within her to keep from killing the witch. She could do it. It wouldn't even be that hard. She slept in the same tent as Alpha. She didn't have an actual weapon but ever since the night the men attacked her, she slept with a small but jagged rock under her sleeping bag. Killing the leader was no problem but getting away with it would be. If Connie was caught, she'd be killed. And she refused to let her hatred jeopardize her future with Daryl.
All day every day Connie would watch for him. Over and over she'd scan the outskirts of the camp's perimeter to see if he was there. There was a lot she didn't know about Daryl Dixon but she did know that if he was alive, he would come for her. But was he alive? She hoped for it but as each day passed, that hope grew thinner. Connie couldn't wait for a rescue much longer. She couldn't stay among the people who murdered her sister. She would rather be dead than live like an animal with these monsters.
Tonight Connie would make her move. She would wait for Alpha to go to sleep. As soon as she was, she would smash the rock into her head until she was sure she was dead. Then she'd run. Hopefully she'd make it out of the camp alive. As much as she wanted Daryl and her friends to save her, she couldn't wait for it anymore. Connie was going to save herself.
…..
"Don't worry about anything," Negan said confidently to Lydia as they walked through the woods alone. "You just let me do all the talkin' and I promise everything is gonna turn out alright."
"Alright," Lydia scoffed. "I'm not scared though. Did you forget that this is where I grew up? These are my people – my family."
"Well I've seen my share of screwed up families and I gotta say none of 'em ever did some of the crazy shit your people have been doin'."
"I'm still not scared. Everyone alive has done some kind of crazy shit to stay alive. My people aren't any different."
Negan stopped walking and looked over at the teenage girl. "Now wait a damn second. You wanna tell me whose side you're on exactly?"
"What do you mean?"
"You just got through sayin' 'my people' and before that you said 'my family'. I'm thinkin' that if you're still lookin' at them like they're your people – your family, then you're gonna have an awful hard time goin' through with this plan."
"I'm not loyal to them, if that's what you mean. I'm loyal to Alexandria. I'm loyal to the other communities." Lydia shook her head in confusion before looking back at Negan. "I'm sorry if I can't just stop looking at them as my family. Whether they're good people or bad people they're still my family. I was with them for almost ten years."
"Well when we get down there and you're caught in the middle, I gotta know that you're not gonna get scared and run back to mommy."
Lydia stared at the ground as she spoke softly. "Do you have any idea what she's done to me? The things she let happen to me?"
"Look kid, I get it. She ain't the kind of mom that baked cookies and sang you to sleep. She's a freak. But I know how these situations get. You puff out your chest and get all riled up and ya think you're gonna walk right up to her and be ready to put a knife in her back but then she sees you, you see her and ya both get all mushy and all the sudden, you're in the middle of a damn Hallmark movie."
"What's that?" Lydia asked.
"What's what?"
"A Hallmark movie? What is that?" Lydia asked.
Negan chuckled and looked off. "Shit kid, how old are you?"
"Seventeen." Lydia looked at the ground with embarrassment. "I mean, I think I'm seventeen."
"It's just a stupid kind of movie where everyone gets what they want. It's all sunshine and rainbows and everyone's in love. My wife used to watch 'em all the time."
"Oh," Lydia replied. "I've never heard of that kind of movie. I saw a couple movies when I was little but I only remember one."
"Oh yeah? Which one?"
"I can't remember the name but it was about this house that was tied to like thousands and thousands of balloons and this kid and this old guy floated away to an island or something."
"Hmm, never saw that one I guess."
Negan's smile faded as he studied the young girl. One look at her and you could tell she'd been through terrible things – maybe even worse things than the average person lucky enough to still be alive. Her innocent, doe-eyed face had a perpetual look of panic and apprehension. She was vigilant and watchful of her surroundings as her eyes constantly moved in every direction. Negan felt bad for her.
Negan looked at her as he spoke sympathetically. "Like I said before, you just let me do the talking. I'll take care of things."
"Why because you think I'm weak? You think I'll go running back to my mommy?" Lydia replied. "You know, my mother just used me. She let other people use me. She used to call me 'Omega'. She hasn't called me Lydia since I was ten. You know what Omega means? It means the last one. It's the lowest in the pack. The one that everyone else beats up on...the one that everyone treats like shit. She said if I didn't like it then I would have to pull myself up in the pack. She told me that when I was ten."
"Hey I didn't mean nothin'..."
"She used me any way she could...everyone did. And I know what's happening here. I'm not stupid. All of you, you're just using me too. You're using me to get to her. And hey, that's fine. Like I said, I'm used to it."
"Join the club kiddo. I told them it's better for me to talk to your people because they don't know me. They all agreed but it wasn't because they liked my idea so much. I'm out here with you because no one's gonna lose any sleep if I don't come back. You're useful and I'm expendable. We're all just pieces on the chess board doin' our part. Like I said before, I just wanna know whose side you're playin' on."
"I already told you. I'll do what I have to do. I know you think I can't do this but I can. As long as I'm not the one who has to pull the trigger, I can do it."
Negan shook his head dubiously. "If you say so."
"I'm scared as hell of my mother but guess what? I'm not weak. I'll play my part in this because I know at the end of it I'll have what I want."
"And what's that? What do you want?" Negan asked with genuine curiosity.
"I just...I just want a normal life. I mean, whatever that is." Lydia shook her head, "I think I've gotten a taste of it over the last few weeks. Clean clothes and eating around a table with people that don't want to just use me or hurt me...people that maybe even care about me. A life with Henry. Maybe we can love each other the way people are supposed to and have kids." Lydia peered up at Negan through her long brown hair. "Does that sound stupid? I mean, is that even what a normal life is?" she asked innocently.
Negan nodded his head slowly. "Sure kid. Sounds like a normal life to me. And no, I don't think it sounds stupid at all."
Lydia continued to walk with Negan close behind her. They moved swiftly to the Whisperer camp and stopped. They both studied the camp from behind a row of thick bushes. Negan looked over at her. "So you're really ready to do this then?"
Lydia took a deep breath in through her nose then blew it out through her mouth. "I'm ready."
Negan walked straight up to a group of Whisperers standing around a fire. He raised his hands in the air with Lydia by his side. "Good evening folks!" he said in a booming voice. Every set of eyes within fifty feet immediately turned towards the tall man with the loud voice.
In a matter of seconds, at least a dozen of the Whisperers had Negan and Lydia surrounded.
"Who are you?" a woman asked as she pointed her bow and arrow at him.
"My name is Negan. I come baring gifts!" he said with a grin. "You see this girl? Pretty sure you all know who she is, right?"
A large man with a long beard moved in close to Negan and Lydia. "We all know who she is. She's the Omega. She's of no value to Alpha or any of the rest of us."
Negan cocked his head as he stared at the man. "Well aren't you a big fella. What's your name?"
The man looked soberly at him and said nothing.
"His name is Beta," Lydia said.
"Beta?" Negan said smiling at the man towering over him. "Beta like those purple fish?"
Beta curled his fingers into his palms forming fists at his sides. "What are you doing here?" he growled.
"Easy there, big guy. I came a long way to bring this girl to her mamma and I'd appreciate a little appreciation."
"She's a deserter. Alpha doesn't want her."
"She didn't desert. She was taken. Those vicious animals you're at war with, they kidnapped her. They tossed her in a cell and haven't been feeding her proper. They beat and tortured her to try and get info from her. I broke her out and saved her. I brought her here because she says you people are her people and she belongs with you. I think Alpha is going to want to know all that don't you?" Beta stood still and said nothing. Negan spoke again, trying his best to convince him. "Besides all that, she's got some pretty juicy info on our common enemy...we both do."
"What information does she have?" the Beta asked.
"I'm afraid that's above your pay grade, Big Guy. We ain't tellin' you shit," Negan stated as he leaned in. "Now go get the boss lady and we'll tell her."
"Tell me why I shouldn't just rip your head off your neck right now."
"Well you could do that but then I wouldn't be able to give you all the details about the attack they're planning."
Beta stood at attention. "What attack?"
"The girl wants to see her mother," Negan stated. "Now go get her."
Beta finally walked away. He approached Alpha's tent and went inside.
"What is it?" Alpha asked as she reclined on top of a sleeping bag.
"It's Lydia...she's here."
Alpha immediately sat up. "She's here?"
"Yes. She's here with a man. He said he broke her out of the prison in Alexandria."
Alpha stood quickly and began to exit the tent. Beta moved in front of her, blocking her exit. "Don't go out there," Beta said.
"Move away," Alpha ordered him.
"It's a trap," Beta stated simply.
Alpha looked up into his eyes as they peered back at her from behind his gruesome mask. "You think my own flesh would betray me?"
"You betrayed her. Why wouldn't she do the same thing to you?"
"I carried her inside of my own body and you tell me that she is here to turn on her own mother?"
"You are not her mother. You are the Alpha."
Alpha raised her hand and slapped Beta with all her strength. "Not another word from you, pig! Your tongue has become too big for your mouth. Watch what you say or I'll cut it out." Alpha paced back and forth inside the tent, unnerved by the news of her daughter's return and the disagreement with her second in command.
"You do not know what it is like to create something inside of you...to feel it grow and move under your skin. You tell me I'm not her mother and say that she is her to betray me, but you are the real betrayer because you think you know better than me and want to fill my head with lies. Bring Lydia to me now!"
Beta lowered his head in submission. He stepped out of the tent and walked to Lydia and Negan, then instructed them to follow him back. When Alpha saw her daughter, she opened her arms, welcoming Lydia into her embrace.
Tears ran down Lydia's eyes as she ran to her mother. She fell into her arms and held onto her tightly. "What are you doing here?" Alpha asked.
"I...I wanted to see you. This is Negan. He broke me out."
Negan stood a few feet away. Alpha glanced over at him suspiciously as he approached her. "Well hello there!" Negan said in a jovial sing-song tone that had never been more out of place then it was in this moment. "Like your lovely daughter said, I'm Negan. I'm very pleased to meet you and your whisper friends."
Alpha stared at him with indignation. "You helped my daughter escape and brought her back to me?"
"Yes ma'am. That is correct," he replied with a smile. "This is a real nice camp you got here...real nice. And I gotta say you and your people are killin' it with the dead, no pun intended. I mean everyone still alive has splashed some gnarly guts and shit on themselves as a zombie disguise but what you got goin' on with these masks is some next-level shit! I'm real impressed."
"For bringing my daughter back to me, you will be rewarded. However, this is a place where we value quiet. So unless you are spoken to, please keep your mouth closed." Alpha looked away from Negan, turning her attention back to her daughter.
"So you were taken by the people in Alexandria? Is that the truth?" Lydia nodded. "Are you sure you didn't go to them of your own accord because you were hypnotized by their worldly ways."
"No, I swear, they took me," Lydia cried. "I've been looking for a way to escape but I couldn't. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I got taken by them again."
"Shhh," Alpha soothed her as she ran her fingers through her hair. "There, there. Now you know who they are and where you belong. You're home now."
"I'm weak. I have no other excuse for being taken by them. Please forgive me Alpha."
Alpha took Lydia's face into her hands and looked into her tear-stained, blue eyes. "I am your mother. You are my daughter. You're home now and I will never let anyone take you from me again."
"Mama!" Lydia cried, sinking inside Alpha's arms.
Alpha closed her eyes as she held onto Lydia. Every time she had thought of her girl, she created more and more distance. It was easier to pretend she hated her daughter than to mourn the loss of someone she cared for. Alpha had said over and over that Lydia was weak. But the truth was, as she embraced her child, it became apparent how much she needed her...how much it pained her to know that her daughter was with the enemy. As much as she tried to treat her own flesh as just another in the pack, she didn't want to anymore. She loved her.
Alpha's eyes suddenly shot open. She pulled Lydia away from her chest and stared into her face. As she peered into her eyes she understood what was happening.
Beta was right. Lydia did mean to betray her, even if it was just by making Alpha care about her. The cold-blooded leader was momentarily blinded by her feelings. She had become every bit as weak as her daughter. Lydia made her weak. Tears fell from Alpha's eyes as she held onto her daughter by the shoulders. "What are you really doing here?" she asked.
"What do you mean?" Lydia asked in confusion.
"Beta tells me that this is a trap. He thinks you and this loud man are trying to set us up. Is that true?"
"No! Of course not! I...I wanted to see you."
"You wanted to see me one last time before you betrayed me to your new people?"
"Miss Alpha," Negan interrupted. "We're not here for any other reason than to help you. I told the big guy that we have information about their plans. I know exactly where their troops are lined up and waiting to attack. I'll take you to them."
Alpha looked up at Negan. "We need nothing from you. I know what's happening. You and my daughter mean to mislead and deceive us. You owe me no allegiance. But my daughter on the other hand she has forgotten who gave this life to her."
"No that's not true. I love you mama and I just want to be here with you."
Negan studied Lydia. He truly didn't know if she was telling the truth or not. Was she playing her part in the game or was she falling under her mother's spell. Whatever it was, Negan could see that she was afraid.
"Hey," Negan said calmly, "let's all just take a deep breath and calm down. No one is trying to trick you. The poor girl just wanted to come home so I brought her home. It's that simple."
"It's alright," Alpha said placidly as she smiled at Negan, then at Lydia. "I understand now. Not only are you weak, but you have weakened me. And the Alpha must stay strong in order to lead the pack. The Alpha must remove anyone disloyal to the pack."
"Mama no! I swear...I'm not..." but before Lydia could say another word, Alpha pulled her knife from her belt and slid deeply across her throat.
Lydia fell to the ground. She held her hands to her neck trying desperately to stop the blood from pouring out. She gasped and choked before closing her eyes. Alpha stood over her daughter's dead body and spoke. "You are as you should be. Dead. Never to betray again. You are nothing to me. I'm the first and you are the last. I am the Alpha and you are the Omega."
…..
A/N: Hi everybody! I hope this latest chapter finds you well. Someone pointed out to me how much they miss Daryl and Connie together and the truth is, I really miss them together too! It's obvious within the story, that they're really longing to see each other also. I counted and this is the seventh chapter of them being apart. I admit, that's a long time and I'm sorry. I don't think I intended it to be that long but sometimes I go down a rabbit trail and I just have to explore it a little. Fleshing out the Carol and Negan relationship is a perfect example of this. I didn't intend on taking that as far as it went but once I got a taste of them together, I wanted more. I hope you did too because that's what you got.
As a writer, it's difficult to craft a fiction that's true to the story I'm trying to tell but that also just feels good to read. I'm trying to do both and it's not always easy. The method I use to write my stories usually has me trying to figure things out as I go. I've said before that I don't really plan out my writing too much and so sometimes I'll paint myself, or actually the characters, into a corner and then I have to figure out how to get us all out of that corner. Maybe that's not how professionals write but for me it feels more organic and authentic to do things that way.
Real life isn't all planned out – it just happens! And most of the time, none of us know what's going to happen next so you just ride with it. It's hard not always being able to see around those corners but life might be pretty boring if we could.
Anyhow, I don't know if what's going on in my head from a writing perspective is interesting to anyone but here it is anyway. Bottom line is this: if you've read this far into Daryl and Connie's story, I'm hoping you'll be here til the very end. Even I don't know exactly how it's going to end but I promise I'll pour my heart into it. God bless friends!
