Thank you so much ShadowHuntingDauntlessDemigod for being wonderful enough to beta my messes for me and VegasGranny and Ncsupnatfan and VegasGranny for truly being the best pre-readers. Your patience and thoughtful additions make the story what it is.

Thursday was the 9th anniversary of me posting my first ever fanfic. In those 9 years, I have written 4.2 million words over 63 posted stories. Writing has brought indescribable joy and meaning to my life, and some of my very best friends. Each and every one of you, those that review, those that favourite and add my stuff to alerts, and those that just lurk in the traffic stats, add to the experience. Thank you all so much xxx


Chapter Twenty

Dean pulled on his coat and checked his wallet and keys, taking longer than was necessary to give himself one more minute to prepare before he would go to get Sam.

When they had made their plan to kill the shapeshifter posing as Jessica, he'd never thought they would go ahead with their planned dinner together, too. How were they supposed to look at Sam, knowing what they were about to do? He wasn't that good an actor. But Clark had been insistent. They had to play it as normal if they weren't going to tip Sam off. He needed to believe everything was okay, if they were going to get away with killing the shapeshifter without him knowing what had happened. Sam had to believe Jessica had moved on naturally.

Dean could tell Mary and Bobby were uncomfortable with it, too, but they both wanted to see Sam properly before he was dealing with the second loss of Jessica, while perhaps things could be close to good for him. After Jessica was gone, nothing was ever going to be good again.

"You ready?" Bobby asked.

Dean braced himself and nodded. "As I'll ever be."

Bobby patted his shoulder. "It's going to be okay, Dean. We just have to get through dinner and then we can end it."

"No," Dean said. "It's going to be okay for one dinner, and then it's all going to hell when Sam finds out Jessica is gone. Even if we can pull off our plan and he believes she's moved on, he's going to be wrecked. He might shut down again. He might do worse."

"We'll take care of him," Bobby said.

Dean huffed a laugh. "Because that worked out so well last time."

"Are you having second thoughts?" Bobby asked.

"No! It has to be stopped, it has to die, but no matter what we know it is and what it's doing, Sam is going to believe he lost the woman he loves again. He's already been through so much. I don't know if he can take this."

Bobby pulled him into a hug and patted his back. Dean clung to him for a moment and then pulled back.

"What are we going to do, Bobby?" he asked, pleading in his voice.

"We're going to end this… thing," Bobby said. "It's sick and twisted. Clark was right, Jessica should have been sacred. We take that monster out of the game and then we deal with what comes after. We hope Sam can maybe find some peace in the end and we support him until then. Can you do that?"

Dean closed his eyes and nodded. "Yeah, I can." He looked at Bobby again and said, "We should go."

He opened the door and walked out into the cool air. Clark was waiting, leaning against the wall beside Sam's door, and Mary was standing by the Jeep. Dean guessed she was feeling unsure of what to do. She wanted to be close to Sam, that was obvious, but she also knew she needed to give him space to come to her. Dean didn't envy her situation.

He went to Sam's door and knocked as Clark stepped up behind him, close enough that Dean thought he could feel his breaths on the back of his neck.

The door opened, and Sam smiled tentatively at them.

"Sammy!" Clark said happily. "Long time no see, unless you count our astral chats, which I don't."

Sam laughed softly, "Hey, Clark."

Clark pushed past Dean, making him grit his teeth, and held out a hand to Sam. Sam shook it and shot Dean an apologetic didn't look surprised that Clark's antagonistic attitude was unchanged. Dean thought it never would change. The sun would rise, Clark would annoy Dean. The sun would set and Clark would still be an asshole. Some things were fact.

"You're riding with me," Dean said, nudging Clark out of the way. "Clark is with Mom and Bobby. They're waiting for him now."

Clark shrugged. "Just wanted to get my hug in first."

Despite his words, he made no move toward Sam. He merely nodded and smiled smugly.

"We should go," Sam said, coming out of his room and closing the door behind him. Clark strolled over to the Jeep and climbed into the back. Mary was poised with her hand on the door, her eyes fixed on Sam.

"Hey, Mom," Sam said quietly, his expression carefully guarded. Dean wished he knew what his brother was thinking.

Mary lifted a hand as if wanted to reach for him and then dropped it to her side again, "Hello, Sam."

Bobby showed no discomfort as he strode to Sam and pulled him into a hug, "Good to see you, boy," he said, patting Sam's back and then pulling away and giving him an appraising look. "How are you doing?"

"Good," Sam said, nodding. "Really good."

It sounded like he really meant it, and it made Dean feel a pang of guilt. Sam was good because he had 'Jessica' back and he had shared his secret with Dean. He believed Dean was going to help him. He didn't know Dean had already broken his trust and told them everything. He didn't know what they were planning to do next.

Dean felt like an asshole, but he forced himself to smile and say, "Should we go?"

Sam nodded and made his way over to the Impala.

Dean climbed in behind the wheel and waited for Sam to get settled before bringing the engine to life and turning on the radio. Metallica spilled from the speakers and Sam grinned. Dean turned it up in hopes that it would curb conversation, saving him from betraying his brother more than he had to with lies about how he was going to protect Jessica, but Sam spoke over the music.

"This feels good," he said with a wide smile.

His hopes dashed and guilt curdling in his chest as Sam's obvious happiness, Dean said, "Yeah. I missed you."

"I missed you, too," Sam said. "I'm sorry I just took off the way I did. I had to though. I was scared that you would… you know… take her away. I should have known better."

It felt like an anvil had dropped on Dean's chest, and he had to take a moment to catch his breath before he could say, "I get it, Sammy. There's no blame here."

"Thank you," Sam said seriously. "I don't think I would be able to say the same if it was the other way around. I'd be pissed you didn't trust me." He shrugged. "I guess I was a little obsessed."

Dean fixed his eyes determinedly in the rear-view mirror as he reversed out of their spot, unable to meet Sam's eyes as he said, "It makes sense."

Sam was obsessed still, that was obvious from their conversation when Dean had first arrived at the motel. He was consumed with Jessica, and Dean had been almost scared of the way Sam was talking, aware of just how far from himself he had gone. He'd felt like he was dealing with a powder keg. That feeling hadn't gone. If anything it was worse now. They had this evening to act normal, all except Sam at least, and then they were going to kill the creature Sam believed was the woman he loved. This was possibly going to be worse than the first time he had lost Jessica as this time he was living in the dream that she had returned to him. He appreciated her even more because of the miracle that her return was.

"So," Dean said, hoping to settle them on a new topic. "Mom's going to be following us, so where are we heading?"

"Get on the interstate and go south," Sam said. "The place we're going is downtown. Take exit 86 and we'll pick up the Capitol Boulevard. It's about halfway down there."

"Got it," Dean said, grappling for something new to say to keep the subject going. Sam took it up for him though, with another awkward topic that was only a little relief.

"How are things with you and Mom?" he asked.

Dean sighed. "Honestly, Sammy, I don't know. It's better than it was, we talked it out a little, but things are still wrong, and that feels wrong. It's never been like this with her before, not with any of you. We don't seem to fit right anymore."

Sam considered carefully. "Yeah, I get that. It was probably harder for you. I got away and had something else to think about, something good. You were there with it." He rubbed his hands along his legs nervously. "I don't know what I feel. I mean, I can relate to her a little now, she hid it because she was scared and I hid Jess for the same reason, but she made honesty such a huge part of our lives that it feels like even more of a betrayal. I want things to be right, I really do, but I don't know how to do that. I guess it's easier since I'm not going to be with her."

"You're not?" Dean asked.

Sam frowned at him. "I'm not coming home again, Dean. I can't leave Jess. I'm going to need to get a job or something since I've not got that much money left, and I'll need somewhere to live other than the motel as that's going to eat whatever money I do earn, but I'm going to find a way to make it work here. This is my life now."

Dean hadn't thought of that. He knew the life Sam was planning now was never going to happen, but that fact it would if Sam had his way was a shock. Sam was going to give everything up, school, their home, their lives together, to stay with his ghost.

Sam had been away from them at college but he'd always come home and they'd visited. How much would Sam see them if he was with 'Jessica' still? Would he even want to? It wasn't real, Jessica wasn't real, but the fact Sam was willing to sacrifice to be with her made Dean see just how deep he was in his obsession. Or was addiction the right word?

"I've been thinking, too," Sam went on. "I know you want to see Jess, and I get it, but I've got to prepare her first. She knows what you do, hunting, and she's scared you'll make her go away. I need to make her understand that she's safe with you, and that might take a little time. I'll talk to her tonight and then find the right time for you to see her. I can't rush her. She's already been through too much."

Dean nodded stiffly, his stomach twisting uncomfortably. "Sure, Sammy, we'll do it whenever you say."

Sam smiled and relaxed in his seat, his restless movements stilling and his head nodding to the beat of the music. "It's all going to be okay," he said quietly enough that Dean thought he was talking to himself not to Dean. "She's going to be fine."

"Yeah," Dean said, a smile on his face that felt like a rictus. "It's going to be good."


Bobby was feeling the tension as their evening progressed, but he was practised at hiding things when he needed to, he was a hunter and had learned how to conceal what he was feeling and thinking to get a job done, so it was easier for him. Dean and Mary were hunters, too, even Clark was in a different way, but Mary and Dean were struggling with it. Thankfully, Sam seemed too occupied with his happiness to notice.

Clark was perfectly at ease, needling Dean and chatting to Sam, teasing him about the fact he'd taken off without an apparent care in the world. It was a vast difference to the man that had seethed with anger when he heard what Sam was living with and what had happened.

Mary and Dean were having a harder time. Bobby guessed it was worse for Dean as he was the one that had broken Sam's trust by telling them what he knew and now felt the guilt of what they were going to do, but Mary also had a rough time, probably because she was also struggling with the awkwardness between her and Sam.

Dean had time to get used to what she had done and he'd been able to talk to her about it, but Sam had been hit with the confession and then had gone straight into the revelation that Jessica was 'alive' and he'd been occupied with being with her. Bobby doubted he'd given much thought to what she had done since he left them. He wouldn't have if it had been him in his place. If Karen was back, it would consume him. He probably would be as blind to everything else as Sam was.

"So…" Clark said expansively as he pushed his plate away and rubbed his stomach. "Obviously, you've got projection mastered, but how's everything else going, Sammy?"

"It's Sam," Sam corrected, giving Clark a pointed look and then glancing at Dean, a clear indication that he knew what Clark was trying to do. "And they're going okay. I have only had that one vision."

"What was that about anyway?" Clark asked.

Sam glanced at Dean, and Dean shook his head and said, "I told them some, but the story would be better coming from you."

Dean had barely told them anything. The hour they'd had to prepare for dinner and been spent discussing their situation and what they were going to do about it.

Sam grinned. "Well, it wasn't much really. I had a vision of my friend Zach being bundled into the back of a van. I had Ash help track him down and I went to Palo Alto. I was too late to stop him being grabbed, but I got there in time to stop him being killed." His eyes darted from face to face, settling on Clark. "I blocked the knife the demon threw with telekinesis and then held it in place while I exorcised it."

Clark raised an eyebrow. "Seriously?"

Sam nodded eagerly. "Yeah, it wasn't even as hard as I thought."

"Show us then, smart ass," Clark said.

Sam looked around and then fixed his eyes on the bottle of beer in front of Clark. It slid towards him and Clark caught it on the edge of the table.

"I'm not sure if you were aiming to give me a drink or tip it in my lap so I look like I peed my pants, but it was impressive either way," Clark said. "All that time using Dean as a cuddly toy and you nailed it on your own." He laughed. "You didn't manage to block something though. What happened to your head?"

Sam touched the bandage on his temple and grimaced. "The demon threw a brick."

Clark chuckled. "So you're not that good then."

"I was distracted," Sam said defensively.

Mary fixed her worried gaze on Sam and asked, "Are you okay now? There was no damage?"

"I'm fine," Sam said. "It was just a mild concussion. They checked me out at the hospital."

"And they were happy for you to leave when you did?" Mary asked.

Sam shrugged. "No one stopped me."

"Anyway," Clark said loudly, cutting off Mary's concerned enquiries. "What about the rest? One vision and some impressive telekinesis is great, but what about psychometry? Tapped into any memories?"

"No, but I've not really been trying. I figured the telekinesis was the most important thing, so w–… I focused on that."

There was an awkward silence as they all heard the aborted word Sam hadn't spoken. We. His training wasn't something he had been doing alone. The shapeshifter had been a part of it.

It made sense. If they were right about it working for Azazel, a goal would be for Sam to be as powerful as he could be as a psychic. It may not want Sam solely because of his powers, but that had to be a part of it. Bobby could imagine 'Jessica' urging Sam to work on it, hone his powers. He wondered what the creature's excuse had been. How had it encouraged Sam to train himself enough that he had this kind of subtle control now, enough control that it impressed Clark who Bobby had seen pinning a demon for over an hour while they drove back from Sioux City?

"You were half right," Clark said. "It's important to train all aspects of your gift, but the better you get at one, the better the others will be, too. We'll get you going with some psychokinesis soon."

Sam averted his eyes and sipped his beer. "I'll work on it when I can," he said. "I'll find things here to do."

Mary gasped. "You're not coming home?"

Bobby shot her a sharp look, and Dean said her name in a warning tone, but Mary kept her eyes fixed on Sam.

Bobby was disappointed in her for letting her emotions rule. Of course Sam wouldn't plan to come home when the love of his life was here, but that was a moot point since they were killing her and ending it all. There would be no reason for him to stay when 'Jessica' was dead. Mary was reacting with a mother's fears, which he understood, but it didn't matter anymore. Sam would be going home with them, and he wasn't going to be doing it with any kind of happiness.

Sam set down his beer and said, "I don't think so. It's been good for me to be here, and I like being close to Jess. I want to stay."

Dean nodded quickly. "That makes sense. Do what you need to do, Sammy."

"Of course," Bobby agreed. "It's whatever works for you, Sam. We just want you to be happy."

When Mary continued to stare at Sam, her lips parted with shock, Bobby kicked her shin, making her start and wince.

"We understand, don't we, Mom?" Dean said pointedly.

"Yes," Mary said slowly and then a little more believably. "Of course we do. We'll miss you, but we know you'll be okay now you've found a way to hide and you've handled a demon. But you have to stay in touch."

Sam nodded eagerly. "I will."

Bobby was a little surprised Sam believed her when it was so unlikely that she would really feel that way. He could block demons from sensing him, but he couldn't stop them looking in other ways. He had taken on one demon, but that was likely a low-level lackey sent by Azazel to trigger a vision. He would be powerless against Azazel if and when he came.

Even if they didn't have a way to get Sam out of Sacramento, to give him nothing to stay for, they would have found another way to get him home to where he was protected. He supposed Sam's distraction made it easier for him to believe.

The waitress came to their table and collected their plates, "Would you like to see the dessert menu?" she asked.

"Yes," Mary said. "And can we get five coffees, please?"

"Make that four," Sam said, pushing back his chair and standing as the waitress walked away. "I've eaten enough and I'm tired. I'm going to head home."

"I'll give you a ride," Dean said, half-rising from his chair.

"No, stay and finish," Sam said, his voice the perfect level of casual. "I'll walk. It's not that far, and I know a few shortcuts."

"Okay," Dean said, sinking down again. "I'll see you in the morning. Maybe we can get breakfast together."

"Yeah, I'd like that," Sam said. "I'll see you all tomorrow."

They said their goodbye and watched Sam weaving through the tables to the exit.

"He's going to find her," Mary said darkly.

"It," Bobby corrected. "And we know. Which is why we've got to get there first. He said she shows up at the cemetery, right, Dean?"

"Yeah."

"Then we get out of here now, arm ourselves and get there before Sam," Bobby said. We're going against the clock, but if he's walking, we can beat him there."

"You guys get the weapons," Mary said. "We need knives, too. It's better if we can do it quietly. I'll pay."

Bobby and Dean rose to their feet and walked to the exit as Mary gestured to the confused waitress who was collecting a tray of coffees for them.

"We're doing the right thing, Dean," Clark said in an unusually kind voice, possibly in response to what he was sensing from Dean with his enhanced ability to empathize.

"I get it," Dean said stiffly. "But it's going to hell anyway. No matter how neatly we get this done, Sam's still losing everything tonight. That's not the right thing to me."

"That part isn't right to any of us," Bobby said. "But it's what we've got to do." He tugged Dean's arm. "Come on. Let's get out of here."

They had to hurry if they were going to get this done before Sam got there. The shapeshifter needed to be dead and the body gone before Sam arrived. And then… they'd deal with what came after together.


Sam trusted Dean with his life, but he would have been lying if he'd said he wasn't worried about him letting something slip about Jessica. Dean hated to lie even more than Sam did, and he had less of a reason to do it. Sam was lying it to protect the woman he loved. Dean was doing it to protect her for Sam.

But he knew his trust had been given to the right person. The dinner they'd shared had been proof that Mary, Bobby and Clark knew nothing about Jessica. There was no way they would have been so at ease if they had known. Dean had kept her a secret, and Sam loved him even more for it. He would never be able to pay Dean back for what he had done and would do, but he would spend his life trying to find a way.

As much as he had enjoyed dinner, Sam hadn't been able to stay a moment longer than he had. When Mary had ordered coffee, Sam had reached his limit. He was sure Jessica was waiting for him, and Sam needed to be with her. He didn't know how much she would have heard before being dragged away from him, but it was possible she'd heard Sam telling Dean the truth, and she would be scared. He had to reassure her. He could do that now with an easy mind. Dean hadn't betrayed him, not that he should have ever believed he would.

He got out of the restaurant into the cool night air and started along the sidewalk. He was more than just eager to get to Jessica now. He needed to be there. He hurried along the street at a brisk pace and then stopped as a cab pulled up just in front of him and an elderly couple got out.

Sam stepped aside for them and then quickly stuck his head in the still open back door and said, "Are you booked?"

"No, buddy. Where do you want to go?"

Sam quickly slid into the backseat and slammed the door closed as he said, "Sunset Lawns Cemetery."

"Bit late for a cemetery," the cabbie said dubiously.

"I'm meeting someone," Sam said easily. "She's waiting for me. I'll pay extra if you get me there quick."

"Sure thing."

The pulled away from the sidewalk and Sam rubbed his sweaty palms nervously on the legs on his pants. He felt unusually agitated. Usually Jessica brought him peace. Perhaps it was because he knew she was surely scared and upset that made him feel that he needed to be with her immediately. He would be able to relax when he could touch her again, hold her, tell her he loved her.

The drove onto the interstate and made fast time towards the district of town the cemetery was located in. Sam watched the other cars rushing past and he tapped his foot.

Before the cab had even pulled to a stop outside the cemetery gates, Sam was handing bills through to the driver with a generous tip. The cabbie was still extolling on his surprised thanks when Sam was out and jogging through the gates to the cemetery.

She was waiting where he knew she would be, standing by her grave, her hands pressed to her chest. As Sam rushed to her, she turned and said, "Sam! What happened? What did you tell them?"

Before answering, Sam grabbed her shoulders and slammed his lips to hers. He kissed her until his need to catch his breath made him draw back and gasp. "It's okay," he said. "I only told Dean, and he understands."

Her eyes widened. "You told Dean! How could you? Don't you know what he's going to do to me?"

"No!" Sam said quickly. "He won't. I told you, he understands. He hasn't told anyone else. He's going to help me. He'll support me when I stay and they leave. He'll help me to make them understand why I can't go with them. It's all going to work out, I swear." He touched her cheek. "He's not going to let anyone hurt you, Jess. We're going to be okay."

Jessica still looked scared and he kissed her again. She returned the kiss and then froze, her gaze fixed on something over his shoulder. "They're here!"

Sam followed her gaze and saw Mary, Dean, Bobby and Clark standing at the cemetery gates. Dean was holding up his phone and something silver glinted in Clark's hand.

In the moment it took Sam to recognize the glint in Clark's hand as a knife, to question why he had it if Dean had told them she was a ghost, he was pushing Jessica away and shouting, "Run!"

She flew away from him and Sam turned on his heel, his hands raised and fists clenched, ready to defend the woman he loved from his own family.


Dean was out of the Impala and halfway through the gates to the cemetery before Mary caught his arm and said, "Dean, stop! Sam is here."

"Do you see her?" Dean hissed.

Mary peered through the dim light that came from the streetlights on the road and saw the woman standing with Sam. At least she looked like a woman. She looked like Jessica, but she knew she couldn't be.

"We can't do it now," Bobby murmured. "Not with Sam here."

"I know," Mary whispered.

Clark snapped open his silver switchblade and said, "We'll wait till he's gone and then take her out."

"He's not going to leave her," Dean said. "They'll go back to the motel together."

Clark sighed. "Then let's get out of here and come up with another way to get the evil bitch alone."

"Wait," Dean said. "I need to be sure." He took his phone from his pocket and held it up. Mary moved closer and saw the camera trained on Sam and the suspected shapeshifter.

"It's a shifter," Dean growled as its eyes flared silver on the small screen.

"Okay," Bobby said quietly. "We know for sure. Now let's get out of here before Sam sees us."

Mary took a step back and then froze as Sam leaned forward and kissed the shifter.

"Oh, god," Dean said in a strangled voice.

"That's too fucked up," Clark growled.

"We've got to go!" Bobby said.

None of them seemed able to move though. Dean was still pointing the camera at Sam and 'Jessica' and Clark was clutching his blade in his hand. Then 'Jessica's' eyes were on them and Sam was spinning to look at them.

There was a split second in which Sam just stared at them and then he shoved Jessica and shouted, "Run!"

She flew away from them and Mary ran forward, heart aching at the sight of Sam's fisted hands as he faced them but her mind set on stopping the shifter. This wasn't how any of them had wanted it to happen, but they had no choice now. The shapeshifter would never come back now her nature was exposed so they had to end her here.

'Jessica' was running but suddenly she was dragged to a halt as if an invisible hand that was holding her. She struggled, but Clark's hold on her was absolute as he pushed her to the ground and pinned her there.

Sam seemed stunned for a moment and then he ran at Clark, bowed over as if he was going to tackle him.

"Sam, no!" Mary shouted.

Dean ran at Sam and caught him around the middle, knocking him to the ground. He held Sam's shoulders down and spoke in a rush, "Stop, Sammy. It's not what you think. Listen to me for a minute. She's not really Jess."

"I trusted you!" Sam growled as Bobby knelt and leaned his weight of Sam's writhing legs. "You told them!"

"It's not her, honey," Mary said, kneeling beside him and cupping his cheek. "It's a shapeshifter."

Sam shouted with rage and Mary felt an invisible force slamming into her and throwing her away from Sam to collide hard with a large tombstone. Bobby and Dean had been thrown too. Only Clark was on his feet still, and he was holding his hands up to Sam, the blade clutched in one as 'Jessica' struggled like a wildcat against Clark's gifted hold on her.

"Look, Sam!" Clark commanded as Sam scrambled to his feet and rushed toward him. "Just see!"

"Let go of her!" Sam snarled.

"She's not a ghost!" Clark said. "I couldn't hold a ghost like this, could I? She's a shifter!"

Mary saw the shock flicker across Sam's face and she said, "It's true, honey. Just watch. We can prove it."

With one hand held up to Sam defensively, Clark bent and pressed the tip of the blade to 'Jessica's' throat.

Sam seemed frozen by shock, though he looked scared and moaned, "No," as Clark pressed the blade into Jessica's throat and drew a shallow cut across the skin. The wound reacted to the touch of silver with a spark of light, and the shapeshifter hissed in pain.

"Jess?" Sam said quietly, his voice weak with uncertainty.

"Not Jess," Dean said, struggling to get to his feet against the hold Sam had on them all. "It's not her, Sammy. It's a shapeshifter."

Sam's lips were parted and he was looking at 'Jessica' as if he had never seen her before.

She looked back at him, her eyes imploring as she said, "Baby, don't let them hurt me. It's me and you know it. This is just some trick they're playing on you. You know me. You know I'm real."

A tear slipped down Sam's cheek and he whispered her name but made no move to attack or defend. Mary felt the hold on her dropping as Sam's focus became wholly on Clark and 'Jessica'. She got to her feet and walked towards Sam. She placed her hand on his arm, flinching at the rigid feeling of him. It was as if he was carved from stone.

"This is not Jessica, Sam," Clark said. "This is a monster. You see that don't you?"

Sam nodded slowly, his face stricken.

Clark took a shaky breath. "You know what I have to do, don't you?"

"Yes," Sam whispered.

Clark pressed the blade to the center of 'Jessica's' chest and Mary watched her eyes widen as she fixated on it. For a moment, she looked terrified, and then she laughed harshly. "It's too late," she crowed. "You've already lost him. He belongs to Azazel now! You're never—"

Clark cut off her words as he shoved the blade into her heart. She bucked once, her eyes wide with disbelief, and then she stilled and they slid closed. Clark dragged the blade free and stepped away from the body as Sam staggered towards it, a keening noise coming from him.

"Sam," Mary said miserably, scared to follow him and try to comfort but desperately needing to for herself.

Sam dropped to his knees and lifted 'Jessica's' body against his chest. He buried his face in her hair and began to sob, his shoulders heaving and her name ripping from him.

"Sammy," Dean said, kneeling beside him and putting his arm around his shoulders.

Sam cried out in pain and Mary heard a word through the release of pain. "Mom!"

She rushed forward and dropped down beside Sam. He dropped the body and fell against her, sobbing desperately. Mary wrapped her arms around him and shushed and soothed. "It's okay, honey," she said. "I'm here. It's going to be okay."

"She's dead," Sam moaned. "She's really gone."

Mary kissed his hair and held him tighter. "She is."

Sam began moaning in pain, and Mary began to cry with him. Her son was suffering and all she could do was hold him. She looked up at the sky and then her eyes fell onto Bobby who was standing opposite them. He nodded once, a looked of mingled sadness and regret on his face, and she understood. They had all waited for this, feared but had no defence against it.

Sam was feeling his grief at last.


So… I warned you, didn't I? After three instalments, sixty chapters, and months of story time passing, Sam is feeling it at last.

This is the last chapter of Another Last Goodbye, but there is one more instalment in the series to come called Rising Power.

See you there…

Clowns or Midgets xxx