Jyn and Bohdi disappeared into the crowd that hurried and pushed and shoved to win a spot in the small room where the council had chosen to hold their meeting. Mon Mothma's only acknowledgment to Cassian and Rowan had been a small and grateful nod before she, too, was lost in the bustling mess, though Rowan did not fail to notice that the bustling-ness of the crowd seemed to lessen a little at her arrival.
The rest of the trip to Yavin had been tense and quiet; Cassian had spoken only a few words even to Rowan as he wrestled with some frustration burning beneath his skin. The effects had not worn off; Rowan noticed the exhaustion in his eyes had deepened, and her heart went out to him.
"They're not gonna fight," Cassian muttered beneath his breath. The words floated down to her ear, and she nodded.
She'd slid down against the wall, stretching her legs out before her, forcing her body to relax at least a little before its next exertion. Beside her, Cassian stood, arms crossed, his body tight though he tried to play it off as if he were reclining against the cold metal.
"They won't wanna risk it," he elaborated, and she nodded again, though she knew he couldn't see her.
She waited a moment before speaking, giving him time to muse even further. "What are we gonna do?" There was a dare deep within her voice, an adrenaline-fired excitement that alerted him to her intentions. They would fight, he knew, with or without the approval of the council.
Suddenly, he shot straight up, standing still and tall, quivering with an idea. Rowan moved to stand with him. To their left, lounging on a set of crates, Baze looked to them. Chirrut's blind eyes simply stared straight forward, but she knew not to doubt that he was aware of the proceedings about him. She'd made that resolution to herself.
Cassian's voice halted her in her attempts to join him. "Stay there," he told her, "I'll be back."
And, before she could protest, he had disappeared into the dense activity of the landing, moving at a jog through the crowds, his vigor returned at his revelation. Rowan paused, shrugged to suppress her own excitement, and finished standing, moving over to Baze and Chirrut with a strange smile on her features, a curious expression of anticipation, doubt, and hope.
Baze watched her approach, smiling his greeting, though his eyes were tired. "We're going alone aren't we?" he asked, seeming content with the developments, "Without the rebellion."
"I get the feeling that's what Cassian's planning," Rowan answered.
Baze nodded, turning back to survey the busy world about them. He paused for a moment, musing over what Rowan had said, and then grinned. "Good," was his only comment, and Rowan wholeheartedly agreed.
They waited in silence for the return of either Cassian or Jyn and Bohdi, Rowan pacing back and forth before Baze and Chirrut, listening with an evident, but not unhappy agitation to Chirrut's mutterings. She mused on all that had happened in the past few days, how her quest to find Luke had become cluttered with so many more complications. Not that she would use such a derogative term to describe her newfound friendship, if she had the liberty to call it that, with Cassian. She wasn't sure what term she could use, for indeed, it was a complication, but she found it was so much more than that, and she suddenly could not imagine her life moving forward without his presence involved somehow. Brow furrowed, she shook her head, forcing herself to focus on the future, to the battle she was sure to be headed into.
As far as she knew, the planet Scarif was inhabited solely by Empire personnel. The citadel tower was supposedly the only man-made structure on the surface despite the planet's beauty. If such a place had existed on earth, she had no doubt it would easily find itself a tourist attraction. Somehow, with their resources, which she anticipated would be minimal, they would have to infiltrate the building in some form of disguise, and she already began to dread finding herself back in the sweaty cocoon of a Stormtrooper's uniform.
"He's back," Baze suddenly stated, his voice unsurprised.
So engrossed in her musings, it took her a moment to realize what he meant, but when she raised her eyes from their fixed gaze at the ground, she saw that Cassian had returned, this time followed by K and a large group of ragged rebels, each with the same tired, haunted look that Cassian himself bore. She raised an eyebrow, cocking her head in confusion as she met him a short distance from both Baze and Cassian's rebels.
"Where'd you get them?" she asked, gesturing to the men, who were now mingling together, speaking in low voices.
"They're men like me," Cassian returned, taking a short but fond glance back at them. Rowan's eyes begged elaboration when he met them again, and he gave a small smile. "Assassins, traitors, saboteurs," he explained, a restrained tremor in his voice. "This is our chance to get something right before we die."
Rowan's eyebrows knit together in compassion, and her voice was low when she spoke, placing a hand on Cassian's arm and meeting his eyes fully. "We're gonna make it out of this alive," she promised, "We have to."
Cassian smiled, but it faltered and fell, and his expression became troubled. "Are you sure you want to come?" he asked.
Rowan's hand fell back to her side. "Of course," she returned, a steady look of determination sparking to life deep within her eyes.
"But if something happens to you, and you can't find Luke…," he trailed off, and she nodded, her defenses lowering.
"I know the risks," she shrugged, "and I know that I could not justify my search if I abandoned my friends in their moment of need."
Cassian smiled and nodded. "That's what I thought you'd say." There was a laugh in his voice, and Rowan grinned, opening her mouth to respond, before she was cut off.
"You don't look happy." It came from her left, and she turned to see that Jyn and Bohdi had returned, both looking flustered and despairing. A fire burned in Jyn's eyes as she responded to Baze, the voice Rowan had heard. She moved closer to the four.
"They prefer to surrender," Jyn answered, obviously struggling against a ball of anger in her throat.
"And you?" Baze pressed.
Chirrut smirked knowingly. "She wants to fight."
"So do I," Bohdi added. Rowan noticed his nervous energy now had a harsher shade. "We all do."
"The Force is strong," Chirrut's words were an attempted encouragement, but Rowan felt the hopelessness radiating from Jyn and Bohdi, and knew they did little good.
"How many do we need?" Rowan asked.
Confused, Jyn looked to her. "What are you talking about?"
Rowan smiled, a reckless energy in her eyes as she turned back to Cassian, who had returned to his men and was now awaiting introduction.
"They were never gonna believe you," he told her, moving forward, back to where Rowan stood.
"I appreciate the support," Jyn returned. Her eyes flickered to life, a profound glow of hope to them. Anticipation itched in her veins.
"But I do," Cassian added, and Rowan saw an apology deep in his eyes. Guilt churned deep within him, and he could not erase the burning idea that Galen Erso's blood was on his hands, and his alone. "I believe you. We'd like to volunteer," he gestured to his fellows. "Some of us…," he paused, looked upon them with a profound expression of sympathy and sorrow, before he revised, "Most of us, we've done terrible things on behalf of the Rebellion. We're spies, saboteurs, assassins." He looked back to Jyn, then glanced to Rowan as he continued, "Everything I did, I did for the Rebellion. And every time I walked away from something I wanted to forget, I told myself it was for a cause I believed in. A cause that was worth it. Without that," he breathed deeply, "we're lost. Everything we've done would have been for nothing. I couldn't face myself if I gave up now. None of us could," he finished, and looked back to the men. They were nodding in return, eyes bright with hope.
Among them, Rowan suddenly noticed Debnoli, BoShek, Melshi, and Garouf, and she gave them a friendly, curiously sad, smile. Debnoli gave a small wave in return, and her smile brightened.
"It wouldn't be comfortable," Bohdi broke in, seeming a little stunned by Cassian's speech, and, she noticed, a little more at home. "It'll be a bit cramped, but we'll all fit. We could go."
Rowan fist-bumped the air, and the small group, clustered together in the midst of the busy landing seemed to collectively exhale. "Now that's what I like to hear," she laughed, and Cassian smiled, feeling the ball in his throat dissipate.
He turned back to the men. "Okay," and his voice deepened as he rattled off commands, "Gear up! Grab anything that's not nailed down! Go, go, go!"
The men scattered about, running to grab what they could and as quickly as possible. Rowan's heart leapt within her, and she grinned wildly at Cassian, eyes brilliant and dancing with energy. He smiled back, though calmer, a little sadder, but no less grateful. She calmed a little as she met his gaze, doing her best to convey her sympathy and support with him.
"Ready?" she asked, her voice trembling despite her efforts to still it.
"Ready." He nodded resolutely.
Jyn advanced toward them, opening her mouth to speak. K cut her off.
"I'll be there for you, Jyn," he told her, before pausing. "Cassian said I had to."
Rowan laughed and patted him on the cold metal hip joint.
"I'm not used to people sticking around when things go bad," Jyn said, her voice amused.
"Welcome home," Cassian returned, smiling.
- - -
They soon realized how crowded the trip would be. Bohdi, Jyn, and K had hurried to the cockpit while the men, including Baze and Chirrut, flooded the ship below, armed and ready to go, followed by Cassian and Rowan. Just as the two reached the ship, Cassian placed a hand gently on Rowan's elbow, pulling her a little aside. His expression was uneasy, and dread shot through her as she anticipated his words to be on some new and unanticipated obstacle. But they weren't, and her expression softened as he spoke, his voice low.
"Stay-," he hesitated, "Stay safe." He paused and breathed heavily. "Please." He hadn't let go of her arm, now adding pressure to his hold on her bicep, just enough to convince her of his concern.
Rowan smiled gently. "I will, I promise."
Satisfied, he began to move away, but she continued to watch where his face had been, confusion suffusing her features as her heart beat hard. She turned and placed a hand on his arm in turn. He faltered, then turned to her.
"You too," she told him, forcing her heart to calm. "Stay safe." She dared not mention the name of Kronos.
He nodded, and smiled sadly, as if he knew all that had passed behind her eyes, and together, they pulled themselves into the stolen transport ship. Behind them, the door hissed closed, and they blinked rapidly, adjusting themselves to the dim light, given only by bluish strips that lined the floor and the edges of the ceiling. Dead silence, the silence of those marked for death, seemed to suck even the possibility of sound from the tiny, crowded space. Above them, as if from a great distance, they could hear Bohdi's correspondence with the control tower. Bated breath pulled the oxygen from the air, and Rowan hurried up the ladder to the cockpit after Cassian.
Jyn sat huddled in the corner, holding a small kyber crystal attached to a cord about her neck to her lips. Rowan just barely caught the muttered "may the Force be with us" before the flight controller's voice seemed to burst through the speakers.
"Cargo shuttle, read back, please," he crackled. "What's going on out there?" Rowan raised her eyebrows, surprised at the emotion, expecting to hear something akin to the drone of a droid. "That ship's off limits. No one's supposed to be on board until further instructions."
Bohdi fumbled with the mic; sweated beaded on his brow and slipped from beneath his slicked hair. "Yes- yes, we are," he stuttered. "Af-affirmative."
The flight controller sounded unimpressed. "That's an impounded imperial ship! What's your call sign, pilot?"
Bohdi was at a loss. "Um…"
Rowan felt her body shaking with adrenaline. Beside her, Cassian watched the pilot with desperate eyes.
"We have to go," Jyn whispered to him, a stern encouragement on her features.
Bohdi met her eyes, momentarily stunned as he recognized the kindness her father had once shown him. "It's- it's, um…"
Even K-2 seemed to be impatient. Rowan choked on bated breath.
"Say something. Come on," Jyn urged.
A light of inspiration burst to life in Bohdi's eyes, and with renewed confidence, he looked back to the control tower through the windshield, speaking resolutely into the mic. "Rogue," he said, "Rogue One."
"Rogue One?" the flight controller scoffed, "There is no Rogue One!"
But K had already set the ship in motion, saying with that still-surprising shade of humor. "Well, there is now."
Bohdi smiled. "Rogue One, pulling away," he told the flight controller.
"Pulling away," K repeated, pride in his voice. Rowan gave a low chuckle and met Cassian's eyes. Anticipation had brought them to life, and her smile brightened at their shared excitement. She followed Cassian down to the belly of the ship, and together, they armed themselves for the battle to come. She could remember the times before like this, the deep breaths before those awful plunges into warfare and bloodshed, and she forced herself to only hope that this battle would not end in such heartache.
Denying power to those fears, she moved between the men, searching intently for Melshi, Garouf, BoShek, and Debnoli. She found them huddled together on a bench in the corner. They greeted her with smiles and laughter that broke the muttered tones of those about them.
"Nice to see y'all again!" she greeted, forcing happiness into her tone.
They understood full well how she felt, understood that to delve into their fears would be to let them win, and so they matched her lighthearted tone in their own individual greetings. And so they joked and laughed till they had cleared Yavin 4's atmosphere, but as the ship jolted forward, lightspeed engaged, silence took its place among them, and Rowan met Cassian's eyes. In a wordless exchange, they knew each others' minds.
If all fell apart, and the Rebellion did not send reinforcements, this was a suicide mission.
But even so, they would die together.
- - -
"You are cleared for landing." The voice of the flight controller could not have sighed more in relief as the ship bearing Romulus, Clover, Luke, the rebel survivors, citizens of Jakku, and now Morpheus descended through the hazy atmosphere of Yavin 4 to land in a removed area of the landing pad. Luke paced back and forth in the cockpit, now cracking his knuckles, now balling his fists, nails biting into his palms, now shaking them out, now running his hands through his hair. Seated against the wall, Clover watched his young charge with concerned eyes and furrowed brows. Romulus and Morpheus muttered together opposite of the satyr as Gideon piloted the ship under a strict command to take care of it from Romulus, a command Gideon seemed anxious to obey, as he had caught a small gleam of Romulus' sharp teeth during the conversation. Romulus had walked away, muttering that they may still have need of it, a view that Morpheus seemed to share, if his grave expression was to mean anything.
With painstaking slowness, Luke watched the ground grow closer and closer, frantically urging the ship to hurry in his mind. Rowan had to be down there, he told himself, though he did not trust to hope. She had to be. He could not entertain doubt, not now, not anymore.
Yet his breaths did not come any easier when they finally landed with a gentle bump and the gangplank lowered to the linoleum flooring of the Rebellion's landing pad. Held back by the swarming survivors and confined to the cockpit for a moment longer, Luke's breath began to quicken, growing steadily more shallow. Clover's hand on his shoulder served only to increase his agitation, though he knew the satyr meant no harm, and so he suffered its presence, only hurrying out from beneath it when the last of the citizens of Jakku and rebel soldiers had cleared the ship. It was then that he could breathe, and his eyes emerged into the setting sunlight of Yavin 4 with a fresh hope.
Toward them, through the crowd, moved a woman dressed wholly in white, and Luke froze in confusion, momentarily startled by the enormity of the Rebel base. But his gaze was broken when Gideon jostled him, hurrying past to meet the woman in white.
"Senator!" he called, raising a hand in greeting, his voice filled with awe and a profound homesickness. "Senator Mon Mothma!"
The woman smiled brilliantly and kindly, though something troubled her eyes, and Luke's gut sank. He could not help but think it might have something to do with his sister.
"Lieutenant Gideon," she greeted, "It's good to have you home."
Gideon seemed tearful in his joy as she continued.
"Your men have served well, and we are sorry for what you have suffered, but you are home now, and you may rest." Her expression was grateful, generous, good, and Luke himself seemed somewhat soothed for his new Rebel acquaintances, but the fear for Rowan soon filled him once more.
"Ma'am," he interrupted, knowing full well it was a disrespect, and disregarding that fact. "Ma'am, I'm looking for someone, and I'm told she is here, or has at least passed through." He opened his mouth to continue, but the woman silenced him, speaking.
"Your sister," she nodded, and the same troubled expression that had worried him before returned despite his surprise and confusion. "You have similar features," she elaborated, then paused and let out a heavy breath. "Yes," she continued, "She was here, but no longer. Against the orders of the Alliance, she and others of our officers have decided to infiltrate an Empire citadel. They left just moments ago."
The blood fell from Luke's face, and he stood petrified. With a profound urgency, Romulus stepped forward and spoke, his voice sharp.
"Where did they go?"
