Hey, shorter chapter here, sorry guys! I'm already working on chapter 23
I don't own RWBY
Winter leaned forward in the study, mountains of homework in front of her piling several inches high. She had math textbooks, history books, folders full of paper packets, and a research laptop organized in a tidy fashion in front of her. She had already been working for hours, and despite her best efforts, the stress showed on her face. Weiss watched from behind, taking note of each drowsy misstep Winter suffered. Winter's eyes had bags under them, and she had also not been present for several family meals.
"Winter?" Weiss asked.
"Not now, Warren," Winter said. Weiss nodded, stepping back. She turned, heading over to the living room. She watched out through the window, seeing snowflakes drift down from the sky, blanketing the ground. With the pale sky above, clouded over and featureless, it was almost blindingly bright outside. She took note of the height of the snowfall. It looked like so far, there was two inches of snow, but it wouldn't be letting up any time soon. Not that she wanted it to. She always loved seeing her yard transform into a winter wonderland.
"Warren," a voice said from behind, startling her. She turned abruptly, seeing the massive towering figure of Jacques Schnee looking down at her. "You were supposed to be focusing on your grades."
"I did, father!" Weiss excitedly said, beaming. "Nothing but hundred percents! All of my homework is done, I started as soon as I got up."
"If you're done then you should be honing your intellect. After all, it is a Schnee's greatest tool. Our best weapon. It's the reason no one else can even come close to us in the auto industry. Do you understand?" he asked.
"I don't," she said. "I already did all of my schoolwork, what more is there?"
"I have access to textbooks. You should be studying further into mathematics, economy, sociology. Every subject you learn in school is essential to our work. I chose your electives specifically to fit. You've made it into seventh grade with decent progress. You can still grow further, however," he said.
"Yes, father. I was just hoping that I could go for a walk at some point," she said. Upon his scowling, she added more. "Maybe. Not yet, obviously. But maybe after a few hours, just to take a break?"
"A break?" he glared. "A break is time you could be spending improving yourself. What reason would validate a pointless walk?"
Weiss hung her head in shame.
"I was just hoping... I wanted to see the snow," she said.
"You've seen it before," he scoffed. "You'd really prioritize some weather over your own mind?"
"Of course not," she said. "I apologize, father. I'll get started right away."
Weiss moved back into her room, grabbing several textbooks along the way. She opened up an eleventh grade advanced mathematics textbook and began working on the problems inside. She had made it sixty pages in, having lost track of time during her focus, when she was snapped out of her work by shouting from the next room over. She could just barely make out the words being said.
"I've been doing what I can, father," Winter argued.
"What you can?" he retorted. Weiss moved over to the wall to hear better. "You've been at work for hours and this is all you've managed?"
"Maybe if I was able to sleep for more than two hours a night I'd have better focus," she snapped. Weiss heard an impacting noise, one she was all too familiar with. She flinched, aware her older sister had just been slapped in the face.
"A Schnee doesn't make excuses," Jacques sneered. "You're the heiress to this company, and for the life of me, I can't remember why! Failure after failure, that's all you've managed!"
"I've been prioritizing my school's homework over your personal readings," she spat. "I'd prefer to spend my time on work that is relevant to me."
"This again?" he said, and Weiss could practically hear him rolling his eyes. "You're a Schnee. Your life is dedicated to the Schnee Automobile Company, not chemistry. It's an important subject, but it's nothing more than a means to an end."
"I don't want this company," she said. "I've never wanted this company. I have passion for chemistry work. It's what I want to do with my life. Just because you refuse to see that doesn't make it any less valid."
"The entitlement you've claimed as a right, that you just automatically get anything that you want, is a clear sign that you haven't learned even the smallest semblance of responsibility or realism. It's extremely disappointing."
"If I thought I could just have anything I wanted, I would be in an incredibly different situation," she said. "But what I am entitled to is my own life, and the right to make my own decisions with it. I've made enough sacrifices for you."
"Such as?" he scoffed. "You've lived a privileged life most can only dream of, so tell me, Winter, what have you sacrificed for me?"
"My morals," she said. He chuckled incredulously. "One of my closest friends. My self respect."
"It sounds to me like you've done yourself a favor. Morals are important, but you need to hold the proper ones or it's pointless. And friends are a distraction. They gain you nothing," he said.
"You made me believe so many lies," she said. "You're a racist, sexist, ignorant man with no concept of right from wrong."
"If you'd like to believe that, you can. It doesn't change the facts. And the facts are, you are the heiress to this company, and-"
"Not anymore," she said.
"Excuse me, would you care to repeat that?" he asked, his voice dangerously quiet.
"I'm revoking my claim to the company," she said. "Besides, that would make Warren the heir. You'd prefer a male heir anyway, wouldn't you?"
"You can't just throw away this responsibility," he spat.
"I just did, father," Winter said. "Warren may want to be part of your company. But I know I don't."
"You haven't even begun to understand the consequences of your actions," Jacques threatened.
"I understand them well. I understand that you'll probably try to manipulate Warren just like you did with me," Winter said. "And if he doesn't want to be the heir, if he decides he doesn't want to be just like you, I want you to know, I'll be there to watch as he refuses your lies just like I did."
Weiss looked down, confused. She should have been ecstatic at the premise of becoming heir. She should've been more than willing to accept this opportunity.
And yet... when she tried to picture her future, she didn't see herself as the CEO. Whatever her future should be, she didn't know.
She looked over to her mirror, confusion washing over her again. She should have been proud of what she saw. A young Schnee man, hair slicked back, face perfectly symmetrical. Instead, it just looked... wrong.
She knew she was looking at her reflection, but at the same time, she wasn't looking at herself.
"Fall, Cinder," the teacher called.
"Yeah," Cinder said.
"Hill, Robyn."
"Here."
"Katt, Nathan," the teacher said.
"I'm here!" the redheaded student said, standing up. "But, from now on, can you call me Neon?"
"Why?" Miltia scoffed, rolling her eyes.
"Because it's my name now," Neon said.
"What do you mean?" Nora asked, next to her.
"Well, I'm transgender," Neon smiled. "So, now that everyone knows that Nathan doesn't work for me, you all can call me Neon!"
Neon beamed, proud and without even the slightest bit of hesitation.
"Seriously?" Melanie and Miltia scoffed in unison.
"You got a problem with that?" Yang asked from behind them, absentmindedly drumming her fingers on her table.
"Good to know," Nora said from across the room. "I like it! It suits you."
"Neon, N-E-O-N?" the teacher asked.
"Yup," Neon said.
"Alright, I'll use that from now on," the teacher said. "Lie Ren?"
"Here," Ren said.
"Malachite, Melanie?" the teacher asked.
"Hang on, if he's allowed to be called whatever he wants, then can we?" Melanie asked. "I thought you had to use, you know, your name. In that case, I identify as a teacher. So, I should be teaching."
Cardin, Miltia, Russel, Dove, and Tock all snickered.
"I actually use she/her pronouns now," Neon said. "I don't want you to end up embarrassing yourself."
"That reminds me, I identify as an attack helicopter," Cardin said. "And it's discrimination if you don't build me a helipad outside."
"Real funny, guys," Jaune said, annoyed. "Can we just get on with class?"
"Yes," the teacher said. "There's a lot of material to go over today, so I'm just going to proceed with attendance. And the Malachite twins are clearly here, so I'm moving past them. If anyone else wants to make jokes and slow us down, I'll see to it that you stick around after class to make up the time. Anyone else feeling particularly amusing today? No? Good. Nikos, Pyrrha?"
"Here," Pyrrha said.
"Do you really think you can just snap your fingers and change your gender?" Weiss scoffed. Neon was a few feet away, as they both stood outside, about a week after Neon came out, and now waiting for the doors to the school to open.
"I mean, that's not how it worked for me, but if that's what you'd prefer, I hope you can," Neon smiled. Neon now joyfully wore makeup with an incredibly skilled cat's eye, and pink lipstick as the more prominent points. She now had hair extensions set as pigtails. Weiss was honestly blown away at how quickly Neon had progressed in her transition.
"You know what I mean. No one will ever accept you, and you're just living a lie," Weiss said. "Why wouldn't you keep that buried?"
"Why would I keep that buried?" Neon asked. "I was living a lie, but since then, I've been doing a lot better! And maybe not everyone will accept me. Who cares? I accept me. That's all I need."
"You can't be serious. You'd do all of that just to act out some childish fantasy?" Weiss asked.
"What makes you think it's a childish fantasy?" Neon asked, cocking her head curiously.
"I mean, this isn't a playground and make-believe isn't how we do things anymore. We all wanted to pretend to be other people all the time back then, but we all grew up. And you should have, too."
"Growing up is lame," she laughed. "And anyway, I'm not pretending. I used to be. But about a week ago, I stopped! Besides, you act like we all took literally any chance we got to pretend to be someone else."
"We all did," Weiss said. "We all tried to escape reality, that's what being a kid is. No one wants to be who they are like that, but the rest of us don't try to pretend they're someone else."
"I hope you never had to try to escape reality that badly," Neon said. "It sounds like you were miserable."
Weiss fumed.
"This isn't about me!" she spat.
"Hmm..." Neon stepped forward, cocking her head as the door clicked open. "Are you sure? Because I know who I am and I'm happy with that. You honestly seem jealous."
Weiss scoffed, speechless as Neon happily pranced into the school.
"I am not jealous!" Weiss called after her. She stepped forward, glad no one else had been there to see that conversation.
Weiss stared at her mirror, panicking.
No, no, no, she thought to herself. I'm not jealous. I don't want to be a girl. I'm not crazy like Neon! Nathan! His name is Nathan. And he doesn't know what he's talking about. My name is Warren, and I'm a boy. My name is Warren.
Then why does that name feel like poison? She asked herself. Neon seemed like she was the only one who actually got how I feel...
Nathan, not Neon. I'm not like that. I'm not delusional. I can't be. Everyone would hate me. Melanie, Miltia... Whitley... Winter... father...
If he knew I felt this way, he would be so angry. So disappointed.
But I just admitted it. I do feel this way. Why? I don't want to. I don't want to be this way.
Weiss fought tears, conflict swirling faster and faster in her head.
Neon said I was jealous. I thought everyone wanted to be someone else. I thought everyone felt that twinge of jealousy seeing things like heels at the mall or even just things like longer hair or nail polish. I thought everyone wished they could just change, run away from who they have to be.
Weiss buried her head in her hands.
But this explains everything I've been feeling. Why I can't picture myself in my future. But if I see myself as someone similar to Winter-
And with that, Weiss felt true dread as she confirmed her feelings.
That fits. But it can't fit! I can't be transgender. Everyone would hate me. Everyone would leave me. They'd see me as a freak too! I can't be... I won't be...
Weiss pulled at her hair, messing up the gelled hairstyle she'd been wearing every day since she was seven.
Winter already made her feelings on that sort of thing clear. Illia wasn't even transgender, she was just a lesbian, and Winter abandoned her for that. If Winter knew I wanted to change my gender, she would never talk to me ever again. She would hate me. And if father knew, he'd hit me even more. He might even go further, maybe he would throw me onto the street, or maybe he would stop slapping and start punching. I can't be like Neon. I'll die before I'm like Neon. I can bury it. I can be normal. I can be Warren. Even if I hate it. Even if I hate myself. If it keeps everyone from leaving me, it's worth it.
I should have known that I felt this way. The happiest memory I have was wearing a dress and makeup. What is wrong with me? Why am I like this? I don't want it!
Weiss took deep breaths, trying to calm herself.
She trembled, fear, self loathing, and confusion creeping up her arms, and threatening to suffocate her.
One year. One damned year.
That's how long she had known she was trans.
And her self respect had dropped exponentially. Which said something, because it was low in the beginning anyway.
She looked at herself in the mirror again.
Mirror, tell me something. Who am I?
She hated that she knew. She had thought she'd hated not knowing why her reflection bothered her so much, but now that she knew, she wished she could go back.
A year's worth of arguing with herself. A year's worth of trying to tell herself she wasn't transgender.
One damned year.
She couldn't do it anymore. She knew she'd always have to lie.
But she couldn't lie to herself anymore.
My name's not Warren. I don't know what my name is. I don't know who I am. I don't know who I see in the mirror, I just know he's not me.
And I hate who I see. Not just his looks, but who he is. He's a bully. He steps on others.
He's not me.
He's just a younger Jacques Schnee.
Did I get so confused about who I was that I just tried to be him?
I don't want to be him. Ever.
Weiss felt tears run down her eyes.
It isn't fair. Why couldn't I just be happy as Warren?
No...
That's not what I want...
Why couldn't I just have been born as... me? Who I really am?
I don't even know.
Weiss, knowing that this was one of the rare times that no one else was home, and that the noise wouldn't attract attention, screamed out in anguish, throwing her backpack across the room. Schoolbooks piled out.
There was Return of the King by J.R.R. Tolkien, there was her math textbook, and the last book to fall out was her German assignment, Die Größten Märchen Aller Zeiten, Band Eins: Rotkäppchen, Schneewittchen und der Jäger, und mehr (The Greatest Fairy Tales of all Time: Little Red Riding Hood, Snow White and the Huntsmen, and more).
She picked it up, her attention coming to her last name as part of the second title. Schneewittchen. Snow White. As separate words, Schnee Weiss.
Weiss. That sounds... right...
Is that how it works? How do I know what name is right for me?
That seems like the one that fits me. Far better than Warren ever did.
She took a deep breath.
Fourteen years old and I'm just now finding out my name. It's so bizarre.
Weiss, for the first time, looked in the mirror and, aloud, spoke to herself:
"My name's not Warren. It was never Warren, and it never will be. My name is Weiss Schnee," she said.
Thank you for reading! I appreciate all reviews and feedback as always!
It's a crazy world out there, guys. Stay safe!
Edit: My fiancee pointed out a typo, just wanted to swing by and correct it real quick!
