Raven was always fond of peace and quiet. During her time with the tribe, she would enjoy the occasional walk in the woods surrounding the campsite. The many trees served as a sort of buffer that deafened sounds from miles away. They also housed creatures from all walks of life that made their own respective sounds. The ambiance was comfortable and reminded her of times that have long since passed.
On this day, the ambiance was missing, and Raven was not used to it. There were no birds chirping nor frogs croaking. The dearth of any large trees in the neighborhood contributed to this, on top of the fact that the neighbors were keeping to themselves in their homes, for once.
The whole street would have been silent were it not for the periodic pluck of a string on an instrument Raven had not touched in years.
Raven cringed as the string vibrated and emanated a tune that was horribly out of pitch. She adjusted the tuning pegs and tried strumming the guitar again. This time, she hummed in delight.
"Much better…"
Now, as she looked down on the guitar, she bit her cheek. It had been so long since she last played the guitar that she was almost afraid of what it would sound like if she tried right now. She was not sure if she would be better off forgetting about ever playing the guitar or taking the chance and returning to an old hobby of hers.
With one last reluctant curl of her fingers, Raven plucked at her guitar strings with dexterous fingers and allowed one of the easier songs she remembered from her past to float with the late summer breeze. It was far from perfect and nowhere near as enchanting as it used to be, but Raven was satisfied and even impressed by how much she remembered.
With her confidence increasing, Raven thought deeply in search of any other more challenging songs she used to know. As her notes and chords continued to reverberate in the air, her vision became clearer; her memory, more complete. She recalled a song she learned a little while after she met Cinder in Mistral.
The song was about forlorn love and was carried out in a minor key. Its sound was somber, yet faithful. At least, that's how Raven felt when she would play that song.
Raven stopped playing her song and adjusted the tuning pegs to better fit the sound she was seeking. With a deep breath, her thumb stroked a string and her next song began. The strings vibrated and sent a doleful sound about the back yard. The white fence only reflected the sound back, helping Raven realize there was something off.
"No… That's not it…"
This song was borderline depressing. The song Raven had in mind was sad, but also hopeful. It reflected the dark times she experienced at the time, yet emphasized that all was not lost, and that there was enough in her life to keep her strong. This sound felt almost like all hope she ever held onto was lost, and that she had died afraid and alone.
Raven altered her strums and the chords she had initially chosen. It did not take her long to feel sick to her stomach by how happy the song sounded now. She had always thought happy songs were boring, just as happiness was a boring emotion. Not to say she did not like happiness. How could she not like happiness? She simply felt that expressing other emotions in songs was much more interesting.
She stopped her strums and sighed as she looked up into the cloudy skies. Once again, the deafening silence filled the yard. She had to ask herself: what did she feel at the time? What emotions caused her to come up with the song that she did?
When she had an idea, Raven readjusted her grip on the guitar and began to play again. This time, the tempo was slower and more forgiving. Her fingers delicately plucked at the strings, letting their sound reverberate for longer and with more strength. The way the chords caused her to melt proved she had found something close to the song she knew.
She let her eyelids fall shut, cutting off the distractions of the world around her. She felt the emotions of times long gone and poured them into her song. Her song of dread and hope. At last, the muscle memory kicked in, and her fingers danced along the strings almost like they did all those years ago. And as her song concluded, her eyes slowly opened, and the emotions of her past returned to their time.
"I always loved that song," a soft voice hummed from behind her.
Raven slowly looked over her shoulder from her seat in an old wooden chair on the patio. She smiled, warmly, as Cinder closed the sliding glass door behind herself.
"Those quiet nights sitting around a bonfire…" Cinder sighed fondly, "Everyone drifting off to music after a long night of feasting…"
"It almost sounds like you miss those nights," said Raven.
"I do," Cinder confirmed as she approached, "And I'm glad they happened, but they're in the past where they belong."
Raven kept quiet and looked down at her guitar. She hummed and leaned it against the wall behind her.
"It's good to see you still know how to play," said Cinder as she sat down on Raven's lap and curled up against her.
"It took a little bit of practice," Raven smirked and placed a kiss on Cinder's head.
Cinder nearly giggled as she snuggled closer, "Where did you get the guitar?"
Raven adjusted the bandana in her hair and looked out into the yard, "Well... After talking to Weiss last night, I started thinking about some things. I figured, now that I have all this free time, it would be good for me to pick up a hobby. I know I used to enjoy playing the guitar, and I remember leaving one at Tai's house before I left, so I went there earlier this morning to grab it."
"That's sweet of Tai to have kept it after all these years," Cinder murmured.
"I knew he wouldn't have gotten rid of it," said Raven, "It's not in his character."
Cinder hummed in agreement, "So, all that talk of singing and music last night got you back into playing the guitar, hm?"
"Mm… More or less."
"Then I'm so glad we went out last night," Cinder chuckled, "When I heard you playing, I felt some things I haven't felt in a long time. Maybe we can have some bonfires of our own now. We could invite the family over… Maybe make some s'mores for the kids…"
"Hm… Yeah…" Raven hummed and sighed.
Cinder sat up slightly so she could see Raven's aloof face, "You don't seem very excited about that, my love."
"No, it sounds fun," Raven corrected, "I'm just thinking about everything. I feel like every time I see Yang, there's something else to sort out in my head."
"Oh," Cinder nodded in understanding, "What do you have to sort out this time?"
Raven bit her cheek. She tried her best to figure out where to start.
"Last night was… One of the most fun nights I've ever had on Patch. I couldn't help but look at Yang and feel like there was finally a solid connection between us. I almost forgot how this all started, and why. I can't believe, almost a couple months ago, neither of us wanted anything to do with the other. And now, I'm able to talk with her and joke with her."
"I won't say I told you so," Cinder chuckled.
Raven failed to smile at Cinder's light jab, "We talked for a long time. I learned a lot about her, and I wish I could say she learned something about me, but I can't. I said things that I truly meant. I told her that I would be there for her if she needed me, and I know that meant the world to her."
"Yang has so much trust in me now, and I know I don't deserve it. I never will deserve it. Not after everything I've done. All of the ruthless, evil crimes I've committed and tried to disguise with the excuse that it had to be done for the survival of my lie I've been living here…"
Cinder frowned and hugged Raven, tightly, "I know it's hard, Rae," she cooed.
Raven shook her head, "I've never felt more conflicted in my life. I mean, what am I supposed to tell her?"
"You could tell her you regret it all."
"Cinder, I've been here for under two months, and there are already some things I've done that I regret. I still did those things, regardless of whether I regret them or not."
"By regretting it, you're admitting it was wrong," said Cinder.
"But how am I supposed to tell her that," Raven growled, "How am I supposed to tell my daughter, whom I abandoned for a reason she doesn't even know, that I spent the last twenty-eight years killing and stealing? How am I supposed to tell her that I broke into her house in the middle of the night just because she didn't want me to see her children? How am I supposed to tell her I spied on her whole family for weeks!?"
Raven clenched her teeth and realized her voice had gotten much louder than she wanted. She sighed, rubbed at her eyes, and rested her hand on her lips.
Cinder slowly pulled away from Raven and looked down on her, solemnly.
"What am I going to do, Cindy…?" Raven groaned.
Cinder shook her head, "Raven… a few months ago, I would've said you should get it over with and tell her everything… But now? I… I don't know if that's the best thing to do… So much so fast could overwhelm Yang, but how long can you live with hiding it?"
"That's… Not what I wanted to hear," Raven sighed.
"I'm really sorry about that," Cinder frowned, "I think this is a choice you need to make."
Raven looked out into the yard. She was afraid Cinder was going to say that. She knew she was right, though.
Now, Raven had to make a choice.
Yang hummed, sweetly, as she danced from one corner of the kitchen to the other. It was a beautiful, new day, and the warm light that flooded the room through the windows only added to its majesty.
The succulent smell of frying eggs and vegetables in an oiled pan drifted to the kitchen and all throughout the house. It was sure to beckon the woman sleeping upstairs to her breakfast any moment now.
As Yang tossed a pinch of salt over the pan, she smiled at the pops and crackles. Not wanting to overcook the ingredients, Yang sauntered to the panty and pulled a single tortilla from a package and placed it neatly onto a plate beside the stove.
She sighed, contentedly, as she waited a few moments longer for the food to cook before finally pouring the contents of the pan onto the tortilla. She carefully shoveled the ingredients into a neat line and wrapped it up.
Satisfied with her work, Yang smiled and turned her attention to the coffee pot that had just finished brewing. As she was pouring the steaming, dark liquid into a mug, she heard soft footsteps coming from the living room.
"Good morning, Babe," Yang sang without turning.
"Good morning," said Weiss in a groggy voice as she entered the kitchen.
Yang briefly looked over her shoulder and watched as Weiss slumped into a chair at the dining table.
Weiss groaned as she buried her face in her arms, "Something smells, wonderful…"
Yang giggled and swiftly placed a plate in front of Weiss, paired with the mug of coffee.
"Thanks," Weiss grunted as she rubbed at her eye, "You have no idea how much I needed this."
Weiss' hand went straight for the mug, and she gulped down a few sips, not even flinching at the scalding temperature.
Yang smirked and filled the mug back to the top. She began to hum again as she tended back to the stove.
"My head is killing me, right now," Weiss cringed as she rubbed at her temples and picked up her fork.
"I told you not to go overboard last night," said Yang in a sing-song voice.
"Oh, hush, you," Weiss snipped, playfully, as she placed some of her breakfast into her mouth and chewed, "Thank you for the food, by the way. It's absolutely delicious."
"Oh, I know," Yang winked over her shoulder causing Weiss to roll her eyes.
"You seem to be in a cheery mood today. What's got you so peppy?" Weiss asked as she sipped her coffee.
"Oh, nothing… I'm just really happy about last night," Yang smiled.
"What happened last night?" Weiss asked with furrowed brows.
Yang looked over her shoulder and furrowed her brows back, "You don't remember?"
"Of course I remember, I just… need a little reminder," said Weiss as she diffidently looked out the window.
"Relax, I'm just messing with you," Yang laughed and picked out a tortilla for herself, "Last night was so fun! It was kind of cool talking to Raven about all kinds of stuff. Honestly, things couldn't be better between us right now."
"Really? It didn't seem like anything was different for most of the night."
"Right, but before we left, Raven pulled me aside and we talked a little more. She really is going to stay, I just know it! She said she would always be there if I needed anything, Weiss."
"Wow, that's wonderful, Yang. I'm glad things are going well," Weiss said and cleared her throat, "So, does that mean you two… cleared everything up?"
"What do you mean?" Yang asked with a chuckle.
"Um… You know... Has Raven told you everything? Like… why she left?" Weiss asked, hesitantly.
Yang hummed as the smile on her face slowly fell, "Well…" Yang attempted to speak as Weiss cringed; clearly contrite for spoiling Yang's good mood, "No, I didn't ask her."
"Are you going to ask her now?" Weiss asked and waited a few moments for a response, "Yang."
Yang sighed and looked out the window, "No."
Weiss frowned and set down her fork, "Why?" she asked.
"I've spent nearly two months working with Raven to find some kind of common ground. You always challenged me to try and see if my life could get any better with Raven in it, and now I finally see that you were right. That piece of me that went missing with Raven is finally back in place. I don't want anything to change between us, and I won't risk throwing that all away."
"Yang, I don't know if avoiding this topic is possible anymore," said Weiss, "Keeping everything hidden from each other? Don't you want closure?"
"Of course I want closure, Weiss," Yang groaned, "But not if getting it will make me hate her even more than I did before."
"You won't know if that is going to happen until after all is said and done. For all you know, your relationship could get stronger because of this," Weiss pushed.
"It's like I said. I'm not taking the risk," said Yang as she looked down at the counter.
"Yang Xiao Long, in the twelve years that I've known you, I have never known you as one to run away from your problems!" Weiss declared as she stood up from her chair, "What did you do all those years ago when I was nothing but toxic to you and your sister? You wanted to find out if I was more than just a bratty, teenage, rich girl. You tried so hard to get closer to me despite how difficult it was. Did you give up?"
Yang was quiet for a moment and sighed, "No…"
"That's correct. You didn't give up," said Weiss, proudly, as she approached Yang, "And because you didn't give up, we have had the happiest years of our lives together. We have a wonderful house on Patch and two beautiful little girls, and none of that would've happened if you gave up on me and decided I was a problem that wasn't worth your time."
"Except I didn't have anything to lose when I made that choice," said Yang as she turned and faced Weiss, "Now, I do."
"I'm telling you right now that I speak from experience when I say this:" Weiss began, "Your connection with Raven will never be on solid ground unless everything between you both is out in the open."
Yang looked away, but Weiss turned her face back towards hers.
"Trust me," Weiss whispered with a slight shake of her head, "I know what you're feeling right now. For years, even after my father wanted to fix all the mistakes he made, I wondered why he spent so long valuing that stupid company more than his own flesh and blood. It never left my mind, and it was torture. But after I got closure? All of my feelings were out in the open and I finally had the strength to forgive him. Just like you will with Raven."
Yang pressed her lips into a thin line, and Weiss finally let her look away. She often forgot about how Weiss used to struggle with her family, and also realized how closely her situation mirrored her own. The fact of the matter was, Weiss had completely nailed how Yang was feeling. That single question that plagued her mind for her whole life was still a thorn in her side.
Why?
Why did Raven leave? Why did she come back? Why now?
And why is it taking Yang this long to ask?
Yang looked back down at Weiss who was waiting, patiently, just inches in front of her. She immediately forgot the last time she had the chance to gaze deeply into her wife's crystal, blue eyes. It was like staring into a mesmerizing galaxy that infinitely sparkled with love and life.
And they were all hers to look at.
The eyes that have always been there by her side; lifting her up from the deepest pits of despair and keeping her head held up high. The eyes that supported her through all life's challenges and the difficult times of late.
Weiss has been the one person to stay with her through it all. Through thick and thin.
Yang did not know what she would do after Weiss left for Mistral. If she was really going to go through with this, she would need Weiss more than ever before. She would miss her greatly for the weeks she would be away.
Yang sighed and rested her head on Weiss' shoulder as her arms delicately wrapped around her torso, "I don't know how I would've done any of this without you…"
"You never had to worry about doing this without me," Weiss whispered as she gently played with Yang's hair, "We're a team. We're in this together."
"And that's why I love you," said Yang.
"And I love you," Weiss hummed, "Always."
