A/N
Hey, welcome to Chapter 19 of Count it Up! It's Ness's perspective, so hopefully you enjoy that. Chapter 19 just so happens to be a pretty decent milestone for me actually, as the 19th (of November) in 2006 was when Wii Sports was released!
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this fic.
Information: The stuff in italics at the start of each chapter is happening parallel to the main body of the story (though the italics are actually currently about 5 hours behind the main story-)
Anyways, enjoy!
Chapter 19: Learning
I greet Duster again as I wander back into the crowd, away from Porky.
Duster claps me on the back. "I didn't know you and Porky were buddies! Wonderful man, ain't he? Wonderful, wonderful man."
I ignore the comment, "Listen here," I lower my voice. "Do not go to New Pork City."
He chuckles obliviously. "Well, you heard 'im! Refuge for all cowards. I'm a coward, ain't I, so I'm goin! Ah, there ain't nothing for me here, not anymore…" He looks down at the floor.
"What do you mean? This is a nice village."
"Ah, it's a lovely village! But, alas, the people ain't really all that! There's a couple nice 'uns, like Fuel, Lighter… but they keep 'emselves to 'emselves, don't 'ey?"
I look over to Porky, who's begun gathering people over to board the horse-drawn carriages. I notice women, children, men alike all boarding, luggage in their hands, all looking so optimistic…
I turn to Duster. "Seriously, everyone who goes into that place will not come back out."
"Ah, is it really that nice?" Duster asks, hopefully.
"No! It's not nice. He'll kill you all."
"Nonsense. Come on, I'm going. You can stay if you wanna, but you're missing out!"
Duster surges off abruptly, joining the queue - dammit! I follow suit. If anything, I can try and get some of these people on my side… or try and rescue some of them. Truth be told, I don't really have a plan. It's just me, against Porky, seemingly. I tried to do as much as I could before making my escape, enough to hopefully cause some help to arrive at some point, but I'm not sure. I'm really not sure….
I join the queue, and I eventually reach the front. Porky's eyes flare, and he glares at me.
He drops his voice. "What are you doing here?!"
I smile pleasantly. "You said it yourself on the stage. - I volunteered to go to the city, didn't I?"
He grins maliciously. "Your loss."
I'm shepherded onto a carriage by some guards in steel - Duster follows me on board the carriage. There's about 10 people already on board this carriage- a steel guard shuts the door of the carriage as Duster and I enter. There's seats bordering the outside of the carriage, meaning everyone inside can easily look at each other awkwardly. Great. The carriages are numerous - there must be about 30 - I always underestimate Porky's wealth. No normal man could afford all of this…
I wonder vaguely if I'll be able to escape. I've only heard Porky's descriptions of his city, as it was being built… His greatest weakness is definitely his frequent boasting sessions in which he monologues all his plans and all his aims. I know exactly what to expect upon arrival, though… I'm fully aware this carriage might well be bringing me to my death. But I'm not scared. I'm not important - I'm not the one who will be able to bring down this empire. The power doesn't lie within my hands. But, hopefully, if I can die doing the right thing… I think that's all I've ever wanted.
Duster nudges me, and points to a lumberjack and his son, out of the window. "There's Lighter an' Fuel. Tried to convince them to come along, but they wanted to stay. They don't trust Porky, see… but, heh, that's life."
"It's not too late to go back," I remind him, on edge. "What about your house? You've brought nothing with you."
"Didn't you hear 'im? Everything's gonna be free!"
We're interrupted by Porky addressing everyone in the coach. "Everyone! The journey will be about 2 days long since we're having to use horse and carriage, so, feel free to sleep, to enjoy your journey. Food will be provided! Just as well - I love food. I'll be meeting you all there! I've got a couple other things to attend, so sadly, I won't be joining you. My trusted guards will ensure your safety - they will check up on every carriage from time to time. Have a good journey!" Porky doffs his cap, and the coaches begin.
I've got just 2 days to get these people to safety.
Lucas and I walk into our temporary dorm on the top floor. There really shouldn't be much moving to do - I only had a couple clothes that didn't get burnt in the fire, and then there's the books, and I guess the figurine of Lucas, though that actually freaks me out quite a lot, so it's quite tempting just to leave it behind in the upstairs room. Lucas sets about finding the few clothes that we still possess in order to carry them down, and I set about collecting everything else.
I study the covers of the books - all 5 of them seem to be about magic, I observe, upon picking them up in turn. All I remember from briefly looking through one of them before was some kind of cloning potion, where - what was it - someone could take the potion and take the appearance of someone else, and that doesn't relate at all to golden eggs or sharing dreams, so I think we should definitely look through the other ones instead. One of the books - Magical monsters and Mythical creatures - appears to be about, well, monsters. That won't help either… though the name of the book bugs me. Curse my forgetful self! I think I've heard of it somewhere. Did Ryu recommend it? I disregard it as unimportant. The mystery of magic - I think that was the book I read before. I open it briefly - oh yeah, I remember now. It was that really cheesily written one… The other books seem more useful, fortunately. Regardless, I stack them all up, placing them on the floor, before wrapping up the golden egg in Lucas's blanket that I got him years back, being careful not to touch it. I'm still not really sure if touching it will bring me back into a dream or not, but Lucas said it's best to be safe. I take the figurine off of the bookshelf as well.
I stand proudly, facing Lucas.. "I beat you! I'm packed - 5 books, one weird figurine, one blanket and one golden egg."
Lucas starts folding up a T-shirt more quickly. "I thought I only got you 4 books…"
I grin. "Whatever, I still beat you."
"Sh!" Lucas finishes folding up the shirt, prodding me, and he stacks up all the clothes. If it were me, I wouldn't have bothered to fold them at all… I admire Lucas's neatness. I admire Lucas himself.
We gather our stuff and leave the room. A short trip later, and Lucas opens the door to our usual dorm again - and woah! It seems to have improved significantly. The walls are even painted now - they're a pleasant orange shade. The beds seem slightly bigger, the wardrobe is definitely bigger, and the bookshelf looks to be more stable too. Much better than a burnt-out room, at the very least. I internally thank HeadMaster Hand, as I lay the books on the shelf… and lay the golden egg on the floor. I glance at Lucas, and he glances at me. It's investigation time.
We crouch either side of the egg. "The person said something is inside it, right?" I ask, just to confirm.
Lucas nods. "They also said it only works once. So, I think we should be able to touch it…"
I move a finger towards it, poking it just a little. Nothing happens, so I pick it off of the floor, and feel it in my hands. It's remarkably cold - though I guess it is metal. The egg just appears to be covered in pure gold - there's no sign of hinges or breakages, but I try bending it and flexing it anyways, attempting to crack it open. Curiousity tingles in my mind - I have no idea what's within! I get the feeling it's important, but… I don't know. I hand the egg to Lucas, who feels it, shaking it tentatively. It rattles - there's definitely something in there, but what!? Lucas puts it down with a shrug. I'd sort of hoped that endeavour would be more successful… but oh well.
"I'll get some books then," I shrug, marginally disappointed.
"Yeah," Lucas nods, putting the egg into the wardrobe. "I hope they explain some of all this…"
I obtain The Mystery of Magic, and I open it. Lucas shifts up next to me, and we study the contents. I'm sort of nervous - I don't really want to find out that magic is real, or things would get pretty complex… I point to a section entitled dreams. Okay. Here goes…
Dreams are important factors in magic. Dreams can convey messages, information, they can remind you of important memories, and they usually provide an image of you while unrestrained. If you have magical abilities, your abilities may be demonstrated within your dreams. It's worth keeping note of what happens in your dreams, just in case.
"Nothing about sharing dreams," Lucas twitches, bursting with tension. "Maybe we should look at 'How to know if you have Magical Abilities' instead." He turns the page, and I grab his hand somewhat roughly, pressure building up inside of my chest, constricting me, binding me down… I've always been scared of what and who I am, but this is a whole new thing- I can't be magical. I don't want to be singled out any further. Regardless, the page is turned. Lucas runs his fingers over my shaking hand- I read:
Magical abilities are rare, and they do not appear to be hereditary. Magic is a hard concept to grasp - many who see it do not believe. However, those with magical abilities have the tendency to express these abilities at times of high strain. Types of currently identified magical abilities include PSI (psychic), LYT (light), ELM (elemental), SFI (diplomatics) and CRN (creation). In order to tell if you fit any of these categories, it's worth looking them over.
I glance up. "In times of high strain… such as when Porky was chasing me, ages ago, and I set the bush on fire. And in dreams- in dreams, I accidentally set things on fire too! In that dream about the Face, we blasted it away with… fire…"
Mesmerised, Lucas turns to the PSI pages.
PSI (psychic) powers vary in strength from person to person. PSI powers are the rarest form of powers that are as of yet discovered. Only 6 PSI users have been put on record, throughout history, There appear to be multiple, as of yet uncategorised categories of PSI power, however. The fundamental abilities and characteristics of PSI users are:
A heightened ability to identify particular emotions within other people.
Limited telepathy with other PSI users.
Tendency to share dreams with other PSI users.
Very mild ability to 'sense' danger and other such things.
Tendency to feel heightened levels of emotions such as fear, panic, and anxiety.
Limited fire/ice uses (only identified in a person once)
All in all, PSI powers aren't particularly powerful, but they vary broadly in power and are, as of yet, mostly uncategorised.
I look up, breathing very heavily. "That's us - that's - that's -" I fall onto the floor, flat on my face, and Lucas has to pick me up. I don't believe it - this can't be right, this is just a book, I'm just, Ness, I'm normal, I'm not magical, I really can't be magical, I-
"That does seem to be… us," Lucas stammers.
I close the book violently, shuddering. "I-"
"We need to see Ryu right now," Lucas decides, standing up abruptly. "He believes all this. He might be able to help."
Yeah. Hopefully he'll tell us that we're wrong, that we're not magical, that this is all just a funny coincidence! Hah. Yeah, that'll be it- I stand up, still trembling, quite unable to process the room, to process anything around me, and it's a blur as we walk to Ryu's office, and as we knock on the door, and sit down, placing the book in front of us…
Ryu looks at it for a few minutes, and then looks up at us, a look of surprise on his face. "You've figured it out?"
Lucas nods, frantically, then frowns. "What do you mean?"
"About your, well, your powers."
My mouth is sealed shut. I don't want this. I don't want powers. I want to make them go away. My mouth feels… so dry.
Lucas stares at Ryu. "You knew?"
I process this information suddenly, and I glare at Ryu. "Yeah, you knew?"
Ryu folds his hands, his face creased. "I thought you'd be pleased to find out."
"Pleased!?" I exclaim, suddenly. "This is terrible news. This is awful! I don't want to be powerful, I don't want to be different… I want to have a nice, normal life." This wasn't what I wanted - Ryu was supposed to tell us those books were meaningless! He's not supposed to tell us it's real.
"This goes against everything scientific!" Lucas exclaims, with remarkably equal volume. "This is an abomination!"
Ryu raises his hands to silence us. "Please, do calm down."
I stand up. I'm not sure why I'm so- so angry- "How the hell did you know about all this before us! Have you been- been watching us or, or something?"
Ryu remains seated, and stares at me, calmly. "I have powers too. I have the SFI powers, which is the name for the 'diplomatics' power. This includes martial art abilities, an apparent ability to teleport and any sort of species away, an ability to detect and locate anything 'evil', and an ability to identify when other people have powers. That's how I've rescued you from those - what did you call them - Future humans - multiple times - I've managed to teleport it away, back to wherever it came from. That's how I 'track' them, too. I am able to sense where they are. Furthermore, that's how I noticed instantly on your arrival to this school that both of you possess the PSI powers."
"And why didn't you tell us straight away!" I shout, angrily.
"Think about it - 12 year olds, knowing they had magical abilities? That would be a travesty. It's usually best for people not to know they have abilities at all, because then, there's the tendency they may fall into the wrong hands. There's a lot of… demand for magical people from, well, traffickers, for example. Fortunately, most people don't actually end up knowing that they have any sort of powers. But, I noticed, throughout last term, until Christmas, something seems very, very wrong in this school. I wasn't certain what, but a couple things were definitely notably different. But it wasn't until this term that things have actually been starting to happen."
I shake. "And?"
"And, I found some copies of some of the oldest magical informative texts," he waves round at the books behind him, "and over Christmas, I selected 4 that I knew would be useful. Because, in this time of crisis, I believe that you two might be instrumental into helping-"
I remain standing. "So, so, wait, what?"
"So, I went out into Onett city, in disguise, and I gave Lucas these 4 books, during the Christmas holidays, for free. I didn't know what he'd do with them, but I figured it was high time you both figured out what you are."
I turn to Lucas, worried. "Is this true?"
He nods, distantly. "Yeah- yeah, a, uh, strange man gave them to me, for free, and I thought they'd be a nice gift for you, Ness-"
I fold my arms, staring intently at Ryu. "Why didn't you wait until this term, and just tell us in person, on the first day back then, instead of all this nonsense with the books!?"
"Because, you simply wouldn't have believed me. In order to believe it, you have to figure it out for yourselves."
I take my seat again, breathing in and out, so quickly. This. Can't. Be. Right. "But I'm not magical!" I exclaim. "I'm- I'm just, well, me! Lucas is just Lucas!"
"The fire in the school," Ryu says, simply. "It all went out - all at once, just like that. That was one of you two - I'm sure of it. It was a blast of ice - which is, well a thing people with PSI powers can do."
I think back to the book: 'Those with magical abilities have the tendency to express these abilities at times of high strain.'
It all makes sense. No. No! "But I don't want to be magical! Can't you take it away?"
Ryu sighs. "I'm sorry Ness, that's just how you were born. People are just, sometimes born with magical abilities. It's unpredictable, and it's not passed down through generations. It's unchangeable. But, I assure you, people with these powers can live fully normal lives."
"I'm- I-" I run out of steam. "Is there anyone else with any of these - powers - in the school, then?"
Ryu nods. "Just one - Rosalina. That's why I knew I could confide in her about all this situation that's happening within the school. She has the LYT, Light powers, if you will; she's able to create a light source at any given moment, she is able to bring peace and positivity to people, and she can also fire a beam of light that evaporates any living being - which is what happened to that Future Human chasing you in the forest, a couple nights ago."
Lucas frowns, thinking hard. "Well… if Ness and I are psychic… well, that book said that psychics are very rare. It's a weird coincidence that we, two of the- the only psychics in the world, happen to be best friends."
"I thought that too," Ryu admits, "but I would put it down to coincidence."
Lucas nods. "And, how do we use these abilities?"
Ryu smiles. "I thought of that - another book I gave you outlines how to use your newfound psychic abilities."
I lean back in my chair. It's so much to take in - so much, and I can scarcely believe it, at all. What if I'm dangerous! What if- if I cause that fire to all come out of my hands, like I did with the bush when Porky was near, and it hurts someone! I'll have to lock myself away in the wardrobe - that's okay, I can do that. I need to do that! I cannot hurt anyone, I can't-
Lucas grimaces. "I'm guessing we were the 'people that you knew that could help' with the disappearances, then."
Ryu nods. "Indeed."
I glare. "Well, what good would psychic powers do?"
Ryu ponders this. "Well on Lucas, the sense I got from his magical abilities appears to be a lot… stronger, than on yours, Ness. I'm sure there's something he could do-"
"So you want to use us, like pawns?" Aggression suddenly flows out of me again, confusing and panic messing up my mind.
"No, not at all! I just thought - that's why I kept asking you if you've seen anything odd-"
I shuffle my feet around, trying to calm myself desperately. "It all fits together. Is that why someone is sending Future Humans after Lucas? Because he's really powerful?"
Ryu thinks. "I thought that too, but I'm not so certain. I wouldn't be so sure on that one."
I breathe out. I've had enough of this. I switch the subject. "Uh, Rosalina also said you knew my Father-"
Ryu sighs, a look of surprise flickers across him, before a troubled expression rests on his face. "Uhm. Yeah. I did, but things went wrong."
"What happened?"
"I'd rather not disclose that," Ryu shrugs. The awkwardness thickens.
Lucas pipes up. "Rosalina also said you had really long hair back then-"
Ryu laughs, a rare occurrence. Why are we making jokes now? I don't understand this conversation.
Ryu unfolds his hands. "Yeah. Well, you should ask Rosalina about her obsession with yellow things that she had." Unfortunately, my mind is too busy to laugh, but I smile politely nonetheless. I stand, also.
"We should go. Sorry for getting angry, Professor."
Ryu waves it off. "It's fine. Just remember - it's about time you looked at what is real, and what is not. Future Humans are real. Magic is real."
He turns dramatically, his face dark. "The 'normal world' is a lie."
Mildly unsettled, Lucas and I exit the room.
"I disagree with him, I don't think it's coincidence," Lucas says, quietly, as we walk back towards our dormitory.
"What, what don't you think is coincidence?"
"That we're two of the only psychics in the world - and we just so happen to be best friends."
I grind to a halt, shaking. "This doesn't change anything, right!? We're still best friends, right!?"
"Of course!" Lucas exclaims, hugging me. "If anything, I think we need to stick together even more, if we're- if we're powerful-"
"How are you not freaking out about all this?" I demand, hugging him in return.
"I am, I really am - this is, this is all so unscientific. You can't just - create ice and fire! That defies all sorts of laws of physics, I-"
"Unless the laws are wrong. But, Rosalina is apparently powerful too, and she teaches science. I wouldn't worry about that too much. Instead, worry about the fact that- that we're different from everyone, and if anyone knew we were magical, they'd kill us, or sell us, on the spot!"
We enter our bedroom, and collapse on my bed. Lucas rubs his face. "Well, it's not so different from you being gay, is it, really? It's a part of you, of us, that you… we... have to keep a secret, from everyone."
I curl up into the foetal position. "That's not a good thing. It's just another thing wrong with me."
"But- but-" Lucas curls up next to me, "it might be a good thing! It could be useful."
"Yeah, but, what good are these powers! I'll accidentally create fire again- or ice - and I'll hurt things, I'll hurt people!"
Lucas frowns. "I don't think these powers are dangerous, if you know how to control them."
I plant my face into the mattress. "It's just- so weird! So weird. Ryu's right - the real world is a lie. It's falling apart."
"We're still together."
I'm quiet, as Lucas nestles up to me, and fireworks explode inside of me. Ngh, Lucas is incredible. Too incredible! Too incredible for my messy self. He's calm, he's kind, he's everything. I… love him. The realisation crashes into me, alarmingly, yet tenderly, like a cuddly tidal wave. I love him. But he's my best friend! I can't- oh, why, why do I have to be such a mess, why? Why can't I be normal? I bury everything down, keeping emotion at bay, I can't break, not again, not here, not now. Lucas would hate me, if he knew. I was fortunate, so fortunate that he didn't feel the kiss in the collapsing passage... I can never tell Lucas how I feel. Never. I'll move on, I'll manage to find someone else. A girl, perhaps! Yeah. That'd be good. Father would approve of that. A lot more than if Lucas and I… Ngh. It'd be perfect. He'd be perfect. But I wouldn't be any good for him! I'm a mess. Lucas needs care, love, not a mess. Why does everything have to be so… complex?
"I think we should read about how to do all this psychic stuff tomorrow," Lucas whispers. "I'd rather just… talk."
I nod, a ton. "Can we just, never look at the other book, ever?"
Lucas smiles slightly. "But c'mon, Ness, telepathy! That's kinda cool, right?"
"I guess. You know, I can't believe Rosalina and Ryu knew my Father," I decide to drastically change the subject.
Lucas shivers, "Your Father sounds scary. I don't think you've told me much about him…"
I shake slightly. "I don't know what to say about him. He's always been scary."
"You don't deserve that."
"...Nobody does."
Lucas huddles up to me. "Talk to me about him."
Words start tumbling out of my mouth. "He's awful- I've gone on about it enough - he's always been… awful. Back, back ages ago, he always used to be really manipulative.. you know, the usual thing, 'after all I've done for you!' whenever I didn't want to - to do all my chores, all of the hours, the hours of work that he made me do. Then, he'd move onto physically hurting me. And mother. He hurt my mother, and my sister - whenever he got angry. There was a week… a week where he apologised, he apologised to us all, and he said he'd try and be nicer to us, but, he slipped back into old habits, and… it was hell."
Lucas slowly wraps his arms around me.
"He's always been into… you know, drugs, he'd get drunk- oh, he was awful when he was drunk. But, he'd tell me he loved me, that he had hope for me, that he had his own plans for me, that if I succeeded and worked, I could be like him… but I didn't, I don't want to be like him. When he said, when he told me I'd failed, whenever he said I've disappointed him, I'd feel like, like nobody."
Lucas nods, letting me speak.
"He's never changed - he hurts me, he beats me if I don't do what he wants. He says it's for my good- and I believed him. But.. I don't believe that. I don't believe that anymore. I want nothing to do with him. I… hate him! Lucas, I hate him, is that wrong?"
"I don't think so."
"He'd always - he'd always tell me everything that was wrong with me. He'd tell me what I wasn't good enough at, and, and I felt, completely worthless. Whenever I stood up for myself, or mother stood up for me, there'd be no escape, we'd just be… hurt. But it was 'all for my good'... When he's at work, managing the coal mines, it's okay, it's peaceful, but, but when he's in the house… I'm scared. I'm scared whenever he calls my name, whenever he speaks to me, Lucas."
"I think… he has unrealistic expectations. You're not worthless."
"I know, I know that now…" I come to a conclusion. "I want to show him, that I'm not going to be scared of him anymore. He can hurt me all he likes, and, I won't do what he wants! I won't study every hour of every day. Yeah, that's right!"
"He's not worthy of being your father," Lucas whispers. "He's failed you."
I curl up, again. "I've given him a lot of chances. I still think - I still wonder if all he's done is my fault, that maybe if I was a little cleverer…"
"Don't say that, Ness. It's not your fault."
"I don't know why he's like that - why he thinks men are superior, why he hates things, why he hurts me - I just don't, I don't understand. How can he have been nice, friends with Ryu and Rosalina, and then just… change?"
Lucas holds me. "Whenever I come round to your house, he's usually… not violent. He's shouty, but not violent. I'm sorry he's hurt you so much, Ness."
"Heh, it's not like your father is an angel either, Lucas... uh, would you like to tell me about him, too? It's only fair."
Lucas leans back. "Uh," he blushes. "It's complicated. It's a long story. Is that- okay?"
"I'll listen." I wrap my arms around him.
"Back when we lived in Tazmily, he was really nice. He's kind of shy, like, well, like me, actually. Uhm, yeah, my mother did most of the work, earnt most of the money, y'know, she collected sunflowers and turned them into sunflower oil, and she'd sell the oil. We had a reasonable house, and Father would usually keep himself to himself, he didn't really work much, he looked after Claus and I. When mother, uh, passed away - in the fields, it was heatstroke, Father became sadder, I think. He wouldn't play with Claus and I- we were very young. We needed money, because mother made all the money, you see, so when Father got an advertisement for a loan service… Porky's loan service… he took out a loan, so we could move to Onett, so he could get a job there. Tazmily and Onett weren't conflicted, then. We moved into a tiny house but, it was still okay, I suppose. Father got a job with your Father's mining corporation - but I don't think he earnt much, so we couldn't pay back the loan, and the debt from that loan still isn't all gone. Then, when I was 8, Claus- Claus ran away, as you know… and Father lost it. Father blamed me, and since then… he just scarcely… talks to me, at all. He only talks to me if he's accusing me of something, tell me off, or if we have to go somewhere, like a family gathering, or something. He doesn't cook for me - he leaves me to do that for us both. I do everything for myself…" He sniffles a bit, so I rub his back gently.
"And then, that's carried on for the past… 8 years. Porky repeatedly has showed up, and charged us money for things - or tricked us, with false deals about information on Claus, and, that's just made Father more distant, more tired, more… angry with me, for being the one who stayed, the one that didn't run away. I try to get him to notice me… but he doesn't. He never does."
I hug him. "No wonder you come round to my place so often…"
Lucas hangs his head. "I'm sorry."
"No, I like it when you come round!"
"I'd have invited you… more than just that one time, but, your Father wouldn't let you leave your house, and my father hates you because of your father…"
I nod. "That makes sense."
Lucas runs his fingers through his hair. "I really do miss Claus."
"Claus might still be around, somewhere," I remind him, hopefully.
Lucas shakes his head. "Onett is a cruel place. And, I sort of, I feel that he's gone, like with Dark Pit."
I think. "I don't get that feeling, at all, about any people. I guess Ryu did say that you were more powerful."
A small grin plays on Lucas's lips. "Yeah."
I pout. "You're mocking me."
He manages to retain a straight face. "I'd never do anything of the sort."
The dinner bell rings - has the afternoon passed already? Lucas stands up, and I follow suit, standing besides him. "It was good to talk."
"Yeah."
We walk out and down the stairs, to eat. I'm hungry again - of course - and my head is starting to hurt. I'm slightly relieved that when we enter the main hall to eat, the food is a good roast mutton and not mashed potato, or something. We're very lucky at this school - most other schools don't even offer meals to the pupils, but then again, most other schools aren't boarding schools. I reflect vaguely on how weird our school actually is - I guess it's thanks to HeadMaster Hand's modernistic revolutionary ideas. But I like them - I think we're all quite privileged to be here. It's actually a miracle that Lucas has managed to get in, considering the inflated costs for each term, but I guess his selling and trading of all his stuff probably was the source of the money… I feel a sting of guilt thinking about it. Lucas has nothing. Lucas gives up everything just to come to school every term. I don't have to worry, but Lucas… I wonder faintly why he does it. Why does he put himself under so much strain, just to come here? Why does he do it? It's the wrong way round. Lucas deserved to be born into a wealthy family - why did I end up with that privilege instead? I look down at the meat on my plate. Some people don't even get to eat meat. I don't think about that, enough - I'm selfish. Yet I still complain about my own life? It's much better than some. I curse my ungrateful self, miserably taking a bite out of the mutton. Villager and Toon Link join us.
Lucas doesn't sit, instead he sort of crouches down - with a sting, I remember his caning. It's probably still sore - Ugh, it makes my blood boil. It should've been me. Lucas doesn't deserve to suffer! And, he eats meagrely as usual. Why doesn't he eat more?! Everything is frustrating me. I need to calm down.
Toon Link glances across at me. "Ness, you look angry, what's up?"
I shake my head, blankly. "Nothing."
"Sure."
Magical. Gay. Disappointing.
There's just silence around our table today. My very presence is making things miserable, for everyone - so, my mutton consumed, I get up without a word, and I just, walk away, my head heavy with the weight of my own inadequacy. I don't deserve to be here. They all deserve better, and now I've got stupid powers. Another privilege that I don't need. I don't even know where I'm going, just… away. My head thuds and pounds as I was up the stairs again. Every step just reminds me more of how unfair it all is. I have a mother, a sister, Lucas has nobody in his family, and he's unfortunate enough to have landed with me as a friend. I don't know how he tolerates me - moping around, being emotional all the time- I trip on a stair, and slip down a little - of course. I drag myself into the dormitory, intending just to do - I don't even know what.
You're not wanted, you're not needed.
I'm not anything.
You should've been abandoned in the forest at birth. You're undeserving and ungrateful for everything you have.
So much is wrong with me. I drown myself in the covers, my ears ringing horribly, retreating into the darkest nuances of my mind, where I belong and where I should stay. Someone's going after Lucas - they should be going after me! I'm the mistake.
You were made wrong. You're a joke.
It's my fault. I'm no good at keeping him safe.
And you hurt him further by falling in LOVE with him. What is wrong with you?
What is wrong with me?
Everything.
A/N ooooops, I made Ness sad again :c
Erm, hope you enjoyed this big chapter. Yeah! They're kinda magical and psychic and stuff. This is something, one of the 4 big reveals I've been planning since the start, so that's pretty cool. Heh, (some of) the answers were in those books the whole time. Who'd have known? This magic isn't canon with the magic and stuff of Mother 3 at all - I'm taking my own spin on things, please don't flame me saying AEAEAE IT AIN'T RIGHT REEE
Also, yeah, this is nothing like a Victorian school system at all. Uh, I have no answer for that one~
Notes:
-Fuel and Lighter are canon Mother 3 characters. Thought it'd be fun to give the lumberjacks a lil cameo.
-Ryu, in his game, is strong at Martial Arts, sorta explaining his power.
Thanks for reading!
~ReadyForTeddy
